quote:
if this thread gets deleted im issuing a fatwa on HTownMARB06 for linking this sh*t on the GB.
Lunch teeth brushers at work
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Last: 9 mo ago by Milwaukees Best Light
I'm working at a new location today and it will be the first time I've had to negotiate the release of some small, dark hostages at this facility. Might need to find the wax paper!
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If you knew about working at the new location, you should have grabbed the Lysol wipes on the way out the door this morning...
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If you knew about working at the new location, you should have grabbed the Lysol wipes on the way out the door this morning...
If anyone else ends up streaming in the stalls due to congestion at the urinals, do you help out the cleaning service by power-washing the skid marks of the inside of the toilet bowl?
Always great to have a targets
I aim for the butt pubes.
quote:
I aim for the butt pubes.
To be honest, this is just a good all around policy for everyday life.
......nah...I better not go there. Such a great setup in the two posts above.
[This message has been edited by MouthBQ98 (edited 12/16/2010 4:44p).]
[This message has been edited by MouthBQ98 (edited 12/16/2010 4:44p).]
Nothing worse than trying to aim at said targets and realizing the beast is tired of being jammed in your pants and decides to stream at roughly 27.5d northeast and you have to quickly adjust midstream without overcorrecting and going to the opposite side of the bowl. Even worse when you're at someone's house.
Two urinals, two stalls.
I'm taking a piss at urinal one. Nobody else in there. Simple etiquette says if you come in at that moment, use either stall.
Not the guy today. Comes to urinal #2 and then wants to make conversation. No. Not in my book. I'll talk to you at the sink. Not while we are pissin next to each other.
I'm taking a piss at urinal one. Nobody else in there. Simple etiquette says if you come in at that moment, use either stall.
Not the guy today. Comes to urinal #2 and then wants to make conversation. No. Not in my book. I'll talk to you at the sink. Not while we are pissin next to each other.
Breach of protocol.
Total breach of protocol
ruSAL
someone email me the ryan's steakhouse story, must have missed that one
jmoranlspc @ att dot net
Oh and I drive around for most of the day, many times I'm close enough to my domicile that I can zip in for a little porcelain fiesta, but if not, I have learned where to go and where not. Target has very clean bathrooms and surprisingly soft toilet paper.
jmoranlspc @ att dot net
Oh and I drive around for most of the day, many times I'm close enough to my domicile that I can zip in for a little porcelain fiesta, but if not, I have learned where to go and where not. Target has very clean bathrooms and surprisingly soft toilet paper.
isnt there an app for that? (clean bathrooms)
There aren't any protocols calling for use a stall if one of two urinals are being used. That is just absurd.
Nevermind, reread.
quote:
There aren't any protocols calling for use a stall if one of two urinals are being used. That is just absurd.
If you come pee next to me in a urinal with 2 stalls open I'm gonna pee on your shoe.
Sending it MrJonMan
Milwaukees Best Light
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AG
Unfortunately, I'm with numbers on this one. That being said, you have to approach this one with care. Talking, or making any attempt at communication is a terrible breach of protocol and must be avoided at all costs. Using protocol to force someone to pee in a toilet because you're scared they might see your little pecker is something from communist china.
I am more concerned about someone's yellow river flowing over the banks and flooding the inside of my shoe.
I went down the yellow river once in the 80s. But I did not enjoy it. [/Leon Phelps]
I am so glad that I have an audience for one of my biggest annoyances at the company crappers.
Every single day, this is our toilet paper setup. What kind of devil-worshipping janitor comes up with this setup? It makes the actual roll part of toilet paper completely useless. This is the reason toilet paper rolls end up getting dropped and rolled across stalls. Is it wrong for me to get so annoyed by this?
[This message has been edited by HotardAg07 (edited 12/17/2010 9:52a).]
Every single day, this is our toilet paper setup. What kind of devil-worshipping janitor comes up with this setup? It makes the actual roll part of toilet paper completely useless. This is the reason toilet paper rolls end up getting dropped and rolled across stalls. Is it wrong for me to get so annoyed by this?
[This message has been edited by HotardAg07 (edited 12/17/2010 9:52a).]
better to have more than less, i suppose. Id use the loose rolls and just spiral around my hand until i have a wad of tumbleweed sized proportions to adhere to my mudslide.
Always better to have more. Nothing worse than finishing a big, satisfying dump and reaching up into an empty tp dispenser. You're just stuck sitting there, hoping a familiar pair of shoes will walk by so you can ask for help before you have to sacrifice your boxers.
Just use your hand to wipe and quit complaining you bunch of pvssies! [/65532ag and MBL]
Milwaukees Best Light
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AG
Don't lump me in there with that guy.
I'm just sayin that sometimes the protocol pushes too far. Crappin in a stall next to another person is definately a foul. However, using the urinal next to someone, if executed properly, is not against the rules, particularly if there is a divider between the two. If it's open pissers, then the stall should be used in all circumstances.
I'm just sayin that sometimes the protocol pushes too far. Crappin in a stall next to another person is definately a foul. However, using the urinal next to someone, if executed properly, is not against the rules, particularly if there is a divider between the two. If it's open pissers, then the stall should be used in all circumstances.
we used to have a dot indian guy here at work that was a conundrum... everytime he was taking a piss at the urinal when it came time to shake off, he would aggressively shake it to where it almost sounded like someone was getting beat with a pillowcase of bars of soap... This guy must have had a vishnu the size of a horse i guess, but after taking a leak i dont see why you would want to slap your hog against your pantleg because you would end up with a moist spot from the shaken off piss-driblets.
Nevertheless, everyone that came across him throughout his history of slap-sessions affectionately named him 'Thumper'
Everyone knows more than 2 mild shakes, youre playing with yourself.
Nevertheless, everyone that came across him throughout his history of slap-sessions affectionately named him 'Thumper'
Everyone knows more than 2 mild shakes, youre playing with yourself.
Did his s*** smell like curry?
quote:
a moist spot from the shaken off piss-driblets
The fear of every man. You don't want to walk back to your office trying to hide that shame.
i always held my breath and got the F out as quickly as possible when i got sidled up next to at the urinal with the slap-happy wonder.
I have lost that battle before. I had to go with the tried and true method of washing my hands and using the pant legs as a paper towel method to hide the shame of having flopped back in too soon. Not sure which is tackier though, using your pant legs as a hand towel or getting piss on the front of your slacks...
Do they not have paper towels where you guys work? Just grab a few and start blotting. Of course, if someone walks in and sees you, it's all for naught.
Electric hand dryers = WIN
But what's more embarrassing...being caught doing that or being seen with piss dribbles?
But what's more embarrassing...being caught doing that or being seen with piss dribbles?
sometimes i just shake it off as seen below...
If someone walks in they just get some pre-wizz entertainment. The only downside is you could get some piss-dribble spots around the belly button and taint areas as the trunk flies north to south.
If someone walks in they just get some pre-wizz entertainment. The only downside is you could get some piss-dribble spots around the belly button and taint areas as the trunk flies north to south.
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