Can't remember if this has been discussed here. I saw a rather large co-worker walking into the restroom carrying a newspaper and a cup of coffee today. He came out a few minutes later without either one. At least you spit out the toothpaste.
Lunch teeth brushers at work
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Last: 9 mo ago by Milwaukees Best Light
CATAGBQ04
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excellent bump. i swear just reading this thread makes me have to poo
One of my former co-workers in AZ was a "large" co-worker. 6'-8" tall and usually ran around the 550 lb mark (he was our mechanic).
When he got done leaving a grogan, the bathroom was defacto out of order for 2-3 hours. I had the misfortune of having one of those days where he dropped the a-bomb and I had no choice but to endure the nuclear winter, or suffer from a blown o-ring. I opted for nuclear winter, and it was worse than you can imagine it to be. So bad that I couldn't even enjoy the stress relief and releasing of endorphines that a bound up sphincter provides when you can open the sluice gate and let the brown trout run free.
When he got done leaving a grogan, the bathroom was defacto out of order for 2-3 hours. I had the misfortune of having one of those days where he dropped the a-bomb and I had no choice but to endure the nuclear winter, or suffer from a blown o-ring. I opted for nuclear winter, and it was worse than you can imagine it to be. So bad that I couldn't even enjoy the stress relief and releasing of endorphines that a bound up sphincter provides when you can open the sluice gate and let the brown trout run free.
i coiled a garden-hose at work today
I saw this and thought of this thread. Maybe I should add that to the list.
quote:
i coiled a garden-hose at work today
Saturday morning I got up, turned the shower on and sat to relieve myself while waiting for it to heat up. Nothing seemed out of the ordinary until I finished up and looked at my accomplishment. It coiled all the way around the bowl, filling the whole thing, and came up and out of the water forming a little poop island. And this isn't one of your pansy ass low flow toilets with barely any water, this was old school, full bowl action. Unfortunatley, I flushed before looking at my miracle of fecal science. I knew the instant I set eyes on it that this was going to be a problem for the system, and sure enough the blue and brown water began to rise instead of fall. I scrambled to find the plunger, but just as the water reached the rim I heard the gurgle of water being sucked through, followed by a full on flush taking all my *****with it, sans a few streaks to be dealt with later. Crisis Averted! I hadn't been so relieved since the 30 seconds prior when I relieved myself.
top-notch cable groganing, Catch
quote:This can be said about so many things...
I hadn't been so relieved since the 30 seconds prior when I relieved myself.
I have to take 5 flights in the next two days and I am suffering from some serious "stomach issues" right now. I am fearing the number of airport grogans I will be dropping in the 48 hours.
t&p
Eat a teaspoon of corn starch. It will block you up for two days.
T&P, friend. Just be sure to hunch down when you're putting the paper covers on the seat, or the damn auto flush will suck them down before you can sit, and you'll be left standing with your trousers around your knees, your jimmy flapping in the air, and you'll have to fight with the overstuffed paper cover carton yet again. I swear, I hate the damn auto flush on airport toilets. Unless I'm sitting down when it flushes before I've finished...then it sort of feels like a bidet.
For the auto flushers, just take a bit o' TP and lay it over the sensor. When you finish, grab it and chunk it in the bowl. It will take everything away then.
~egon
~egon
Damn. How have I never thought of it? That sure would've come in handy in Detroit back in '04. Damn auto flush sprayed my ass five or six times before I finished taking care of business.
After joking around about getting a forever lazy for weeks, my girlfriend got me one as a joke... testing it out now... Not gonna lie, this will change my pooping experience for the better
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5S2p7AiNX9g
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5S2p7AiNX9g
that infomercial is ridiculous
Milwaukees Best Light
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AG
Holy crap! I watched the video and this one was on the side:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-IrlhLF1c3k&feature=related
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-IrlhLF1c3k&feature=related
You haven't lived until you have a football game watching party combined with a forever lazy garment wearing party.
If you say otherwise, you smoke the pole. In fact, you are probably smoking it right now.
On the crapping related front, I went to my buddy's ranch this weekend. Lots of bourbon, some beer, a metric shat ton of food, and not a single dump. By the time I got home, I was in pain and the o-ring was screaming for some pressure relief. Nothing like walking through the door after a weekend away and heading straight to the can to do some business.
If you say otherwise, you smoke the pole. In fact, you are probably smoking it right now.
On the crapping related front, I went to my buddy's ranch this weekend. Lots of bourbon, some beer, a metric shat ton of food, and not a single dump. By the time I got home, I was in pain and the o-ring was screaming for some pressure relief. Nothing like walking through the door after a weekend away and heading straight to the can to do some business.
jetch17
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quote:
Holy crap! I watched the video and this one was on the side:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-IrlhLF1c3k&feature=related
Can't. Breathe.
Haven't laughed like that in a while.
quote:
Holy crap! I watched the video and this one was on the side:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-IrlhLF1c3k&feature=related
Holy.Crap.
A couple of questions about this gadget here:
1. What happens when a dog feels the need to drag it's ass on the ground immediately after the dump? I would not want to have to clean that mess up.
2. What happens when a dog has a cliffhanger with one of these?
HOLY CRAP....THE POO TRAP IS HALARIOUS
Lol, the rib said we need to get one of these:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=bM4eJ38S7Hw
[This message has been edited by Cromagnum (edited 12/19/2011 7:15p).]
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=bM4eJ38S7Hw
[This message has been edited by Cromagnum (edited 12/19/2011 7:15p).]
^
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I was halfway through that before I realized it wasn't an SNL skit.
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I was halfway through that before I realized it wasn't an SNL skit.
To those at Hobby this morning...I'm sorry. Can't resist the urge to take full advantage of a great bathroom full of people I'll never see again
That dog thing is hilarious. And gross.
PooTrap
Droppin' a Yule log
Clark: "Oh no no no, she's not dead. We're just divorced. She's history. And, obviously she doesn't wear underwear. And, there are plenty of shopping days left until aduteries - adulthood - which is to say christmas, as in yule, yule log. Not a log, I don't have a log. I mean you know. If I had a log, not in the sence that you think I said I did. Good golly. Tis the season to be merry."
Mary: "Well that's my name."
Clark: "No *****"
Mary: "Well that's my name."
Clark: "No *****"
jetch17
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Poop trap!
I laughed so much I fogged up the windows in my house.
~egon
I laughed so much I fogged up the windows in my house.
~egon
Been an awesome few days of rope draggin after gorging Christmas eve/day/dayafter
Just blew out my o-ring in the office stall. Long weekend took its toll.
If any of you walked into the McDonald's at 45 & 30 in Huntsville yesterday around the 0500 mark, you have my sympathies. Had to get the pre-game deuce in before heading to the deer blind, and it was impressive.
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