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Lunch teeth brushers at work

416,434 Views | 2665 Replies | Last: 9 mo ago by Milwaukees Best Light
Westicles
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3:39p, 1/12/11
AG
If that happened to me, I'd honestly consider doing the following:

1) Taking a wad of toilet paper
2) Wipe that annoying dingleberry hanger with the wad, causing a really smeared mess on the TP
3) Reach down and sticking the "used" TP onto his nicely shined shoe

Seriously, **** people who invade your personal space, especially your personal ****ing or pissing space.
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Texaggie7nine
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3:44p, 1/12/11
One of the primary reasons I trained by body to go at home. I can think of very few more gross things than having to listen to some stranger's butt flute as it displaces air, solid and liquid into a very acoustic magnifying receptacle all while enjoying the aroma that accompanies it.

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HotardAg07
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3:51p, 1/12/11
AG
Just started taking down that top 100 dishes list today during lunch and already been to the porcelain throne twice since, paying homage to the gods of empanadas.

Next week, anybody near town and country down to try out Cafe Rita?
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et98
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4:36p, 1/12/11
AG
I got pee'd on by a little kid at the urinal next to me at restaurant several years ago. The bathroom was next to the exit, and I stopped to take a leak on my way out.

Instead of paying attention to what he was doing, he was playing with 2 hot-wheels cars (with both hands). He slowly turned toward me as he played with his cars, but I didn't notice because I always stare straight ahead in the bathroom. I felt something on my pants leg but just thought my phone was vibrating. After a couple of seconds, we both realized what was happening at the same time. He quickly zipped up and ran out. I contemplated looking for him & his parents in the restaurant, but just left since I was soaked with piss from the kneed down.
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tamulax33
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4:46p, 1/12/11
David_Puddy
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5:11p, 1/12/11
AG
Christ that is funny, however, I'd be very pissed if that happened to me.
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Echoes97
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5:23p, 1/12/11
AG
Thought of this thread today, after seeing a dude walk in to the facility, wash his hands and take a mirror gander, then head off to the throne. I mean WTF is with the pre-blast cleanup/checkup? I make a b-line, especially if the handi-crapper is open.
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schmendeler
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5:35p, 1/12/11
AG
reminds me of a random saying: a gentleman washes his hands after using the toilet. a southern gentleman washes his hands before using the toilet. don't ask me where that comes from.
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Vernada
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6:42p, 1/12/11
AG
you ever head off toward the work bathroom with full intentions to blow the back out of the porcelain throne, to only discover seconds later you are standing in front of the urinal taking a leak because auto-pilot kicked in somewhere along the way? Then what? If you're all alone it's not big deal. I've had to clench and hold until the bathroom vacated or had to finish up and make a quick circular route back.
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Arminius
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8:30p, 1/12/11
quote:
I got pee'd on by a little kid at the urinal next to me at restaurant several years ago.


Something very similar occurred to me recently...

There was some random dude, probably a visitor in the office for a meeting, talking loudly on his cell looking at the ceiling while taking a leak while on some gawsh-awful important freaking call - 'check me out I'm mister king swinging dick...'

So, my bladder being under immense pressure from having to sit in a long meeting, I take the urinal next to him since there are only two and the stalls are full. Out of the corner of my eye, I realize this guy's shoulders are swaying slightly and I kind of think 'WTF?' and hurry to close off, two shakes, zip and go.

I go to wash my hands/mirror check and as I turn to go out, I see all these small dark spots along my left ankle (I was to the right of "mister I'm so effing important I gotta talk on my crackberry whilst pissing".

Turns out mister important let his stream hit the side of the urinal (if not the wall) to the point that the divider between was unable to protect me from the deflected microscopic piss spray.

Not really sure what to have cooked up as retribution for mister sways 'n' pees if I see him in the gents again...
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ellebee
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9:23p, 1/12/11
We had a potluck at work and my old boss brings her PLATE OF FOOD in the bathroom. If that's not bad enough, she takes the handicap stall and sets the plate of food ON THE EFFING FLOOR BETWEEN HER LEGS while she does her business. Not to mention how often the toilets overflowed. Just no excuse for that kind of nonsense.

[This message has been edited by ellebee (edited 1/12/2011 9:25p).]
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Texaggie7nine
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10:06p, 1/12/11
That's awesome. Did she eat off it while pooin?

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Westicles
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7:15a, 1/13/11
AG
I guess if you know you're going to be in there a while, it's a smart idea to take a little snack.
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jetch17
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7:20a, 1/13/11
Ferris Wheel Allstar
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7:22a, 1/13/11
AG
quote:
taint98


how do you like it when someone wipes back to front?
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Westicles
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7:32a, 1/13/11
AG
Ha, I didn't even notice his username. Awesome.
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Vernada
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8:02a, 1/13/11
AG
Currently mid-groan and someone just walked in and started brushing his teeth!
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sts7049
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8:07a, 1/13/11
AG
time to release a splasher!
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Texaggie7nine
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8:09a, 1/13/11
PLEWP!

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tamulax33
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8:18a, 1/13/11
AG
I think I have the jetch virus. already been in the 'office' 6 times this morning. I should have stayed home.
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spadilly
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8:18a, 1/13/11
S
Checking in on the iPhone from stall #1.

Looks like my morning coffee cleansed me out pretty good...
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jetch17
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8:46a, 1/13/11
AG
man tamulax, that sh*t is not fun. Im still chugging Gatorade & pedialyte today from dehydration yesterday.

that is one kind of sh*t i dont wish upon anyone.
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Ferris Wheel Allstar
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9:15a, 1/13/11
AG
There is a stomach bug going around right now too. I need to lose a few LBs, I am hoping I get it soon
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David_Puddy
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9:28a, 1/13/11
AG
quote:
Something very similar occurred to me recently...

There was some random dude, probably a visitor in the office for a meeting, talking loudly on his cell looking at the ceiling while taking a leak while on some gawsh-awful important freaking call - 'check me out I'm mister king swinging dick...'

So, my bladder being under immense pressure from having to sit in a long meeting, I take the urinal next to him since there are only two and the stalls are full. Out of the corner of my eye, I realize this guy's shoulders are swaying slightly and I kind of think 'WTF?' and hurry to close off, two shakes, zip and go.

I go to wash my hands/mirror check and as I turn to go out, I see all these small dark spots along my left ankle (I was to the right of "mister I'm so effing important I gotta talk on my crackberry whilst pissing".

Turns out mister important let his stream hit the side of the urinal (if not the wall) to the point that the divider between was unable to protect me from the deflected microscopic piss spray.

Not really sure what to have cooked up as retribution for mister sways 'n' pees if I see him in the gents again...


A little kid who doesn't know better is one thing, that's something to let slide. If that dude would have done that to me, I would have been waiting for him outside of the bathroom to punch him in the grill. F a bunch of that nonsense.
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David_Puddy
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9:29a, 1/13/11
AG
quote:
that is one kind of sh*t i dont wish upon anyone.


Not me. I hope that highwayman is plagued with it for the remainder of the month.
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jetch17
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9:31a, 1/13/11
AG
i guess i meant my fellow Tine-board sh*tters & comrades
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Westicles
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9:37a, 1/13/11
AG
quote:
Not me. I hope that highwayman is plagued with it for the remainder of the month.

What the ****? This site, this particular board and especially this thread has been phenomenal without even the mention of that ****ing clown. Why did you have to go and gay it up with that out of the blue nonsense?
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ellebee
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9:47a, 1/13/11
Now I could see a little snack if you're in it for the long haul, but really, who needs a whole overflowing plate of food? It was covered with a napkin, so that might have kept the germs out. Or maybe it was a toilet seat cover...

So my son just used the term "bubbleguts" this morning when describing his intestinal issues. I'm going to have to incorporate this word into my every day vocab.
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jetch17
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9:52a, 1/13/11
AG
bubbleguts & mudbutt are common terms round our house.
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jetch17
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9:53a, 1/13/11
AG
and im happy to report my old lady uses 'grogan' regularly now, as well.
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Ferris Wheel Allstar
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10:23a, 1/13/11
AG


my award for being #800
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jetch17
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10:25a, 1/13/11
AG
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spadilly
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10:32a, 1/13/11
S
quote:
Thought of this thread today, after seeing a dude walk in to the facility, wash his hands and take a mirror gander, then head off to the throne. I mean WTF is with the pre-blast cleanup/checkup? I make a b-line, especially if the handi-crapper is open.


we have a guy that does the same here...no clue. seems like a waste of time.
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tamulax33
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10:36a, 1/13/11
AG
well.. i had to come home. way too many 'office' visits for my liking at the office. Now I get to relax upon my own thrown for the rest of the day. Perhaps I will build my own green chair.
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ellebee
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10:37a, 1/13/11
Mudbutt... Flows off the tongue nicely.

Ha HAAAAAA!! I kill me!!!
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