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Lunch teeth brushers at work

422,833 Views | 2665 Replies | Last: 10 mo ago by Milwaukees Best Light
MouthBQ98
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AG
quote:
I'll lean fwd and clean mr brown from "front" to back by reaching back.


Don't work if you have a big ass.
Westicles
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quote:
Good gawd no! You run the risk of hand touching water (or worse). No thank you.

I've participated in this method for 15+ years and have never once touched water or got and dung on my hand. Maybe you people just have terrible hand/eye/crack coordination.
MouthBQ98
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quote:
wiping from front to back


This is the way chicks do it so they don't contaminate their junk.
KT_Ag08
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Wipe 'til white is right.
jetch17
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if you have that big of an ass that prevents a conventional wiping, maybe you should just resort to a wet rag on a stick to ensure proper cleanliness within the epic crevasse.
David_Puddy
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I feel weird that other dudes are trying to tell me how to wipe my own anus.
Vernada
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quote:
Don't work if you have a big ass.


I can't fathom how huge my ass would have to be to prevent me from utilizing my preferred wiping method.
Catch
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What is this "wiping" you refer to? I just finish up, leave it be and crack it off like dried mud after a few hours.
jetch17
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is it so hard to start the wipe once TP hits taint, then apply force across dirty area and successfully abort wipe by the time you get to the top of the crack?
Westicles
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Vernada
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Westicles
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Oh and I've also never gotten any residual poo on my taint either. What sort of operation are you guys running here.
jetch17
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spot on ada, i always revert to that episode when talking about biggins and hard to reach body canals.
HouAggie
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Within the past few months, I started wiping both F to B and B to F. I've found a whole new level of cleanliness that I didn't know existed.

I attack both from the rear/side, so to do back to front, it requires more of a pushing motion. And front to back is more of a pull.

It sounds much more difficult than it is and I recommend others give it a shot. Just make sure you've got ample TP, especially as a beginner.
Vernada
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I run an operation that is in the reverse of whatever it is that your doing.
Vernada
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quote:
it requires more of a pushing motion
Westicles
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Great idea Houaggie. Your method likely is the most efficient and cleansing your butt hairs of any particles stuck in there from single action wiping. I will be trying this dual method soon.
Arminius
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So, for the standers out there, do you go back to front or front to back?
CATAGBQ04
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What about experience with bidets?

I went to Canada once and used one, wow...just wow.
spadilly
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S
front to back.

end of thread. (actually, i hope not...this is the best thread of the tine board since you-know-who)
jetch17
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any of yall ever just say F*** it and hit it with the grown adult version of this:



get ready to live.
David_Puddy
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quote:
Arminius
posted 2:23p, 12/21/10



So, for the standers out there, do you go back to front or front to back?


Down to up....err I mean, nevermind. Standing to wipe your anus is for 3 year olds.
Vernada
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quote:
What about experience with bidets?

I went to Canada once and used one, wow...just wow.


from my very limited time in Japan I can tell you those fools take their hole cleaning very seriously. Their toilets had more buttons than my DVD player.
Arminius
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quote:
Standing to wipe your anus is for 3 year olds.


Agreed, just seeing where they 'stand' on this topic...
CATAGBQ04
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quote:
So, for the standers out there, do you go back to front or front to back?


That plus what Hou said, works well
jetch17
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pa-dow!

jetch17
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and if youre not careful doing some google image searching, you may stumble upon several pictures very similar to the one referenced above excpet replace the toilet with an upstanding young lady.

squirt-tastic!
Texaggie7nine
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If it's on a good sized toilet seat, especially the oval ones that have large openings in the front, its easily doable without any risk of mud smearage.

Exhausted Nihilist
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They have those toilets in the presidential suite at the St. Regis. I used it and it was a life changing experience. I will definitely be getting one for my next home.
gougler08
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Front to back for the win, no way I'm taking the effort to move my junk out of the way to wipe. HouAggie's method, while complicated, does seem like it could work well...may need to dabble in that method soon
Jugstore Cowboy
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Some time ago I predicted there would be a thread on this board about how to wipe one's ass. Looks like we've finally hit that milestone.

Vernada
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the pushing part seems like it would run the risk of getting your TP out of whack or torn. I guess if you are a nasty wadder then you don't concern yourself with that stuff.
KT_Ag08
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The bidet stream reminds me a POV squirter video...
jetch17
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Caliber
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It really is amusing to see the different variations of wiping that people come up with...

Now, are you a single use wiper or a wipe/fold/wipe wiper?
 
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