Alright, I might end up scaring the crap out of yall.
So in September of '23, I got vasectomy #1. Honestly the most no nothing procedure. Urologist and I sat there and talked about deer hunting and deer biology. I was easily back at work the next day....honestly, didn't slow me down much. I DID exceed my required number of pops. December rolls around, sperm analysis #1, 33k. Technically in the safe range, but let's wait two months (booooo) and try again. February rolls around, surprise 195k. Uhh this is going the wrong way.
The decision is made to do a second vasectomy in a surgical center under general anesthesia. Week out, surgical center calls and it will be about $2,000 not counting the anesthesiologist, but the Urologist was going to forgo his fee. How nice. Crap, I can't afford that. Urologist agrees to do #2 as another office visit. So another co-pay which ends up confusing the hell out of the insurance company.
Since #1 went so well, I decided against the Valium and my wife driving me home, and just went with nitrous for #2. Nut #1 went perfectly fine. Then things went south. Apparently the lidocaine was from a different batch. When he did the "Hey can you feel this" and started cutting, not only could I feel the cutting, the damn lidocaine was lighting me up. There was no stick, sting, burn, and then numb. It was stick, sting, burn, oh crap this is really burning and oh sh-- yes I can feel you cutting. At which point in time I nearly black out, I initially thought due to huffing like hell on the nitrous, but the Urologist said later "no that was from then pain". He went on to state that in 20 plus years, he had never seen that reaction to the lidocaine and had never had a patient fight through the pain I did. Oh yippy. He sent the nurse literally running to get a vial from a different batch. Got stuck again, and it worked like it was supposed to. He finished up the procedure. He showed me where he had taken nearly 4 times the length they normally remove from the vas and yes, he cuaterized the hell out of the ends.
So about a week later, I developed a sperm granuloma about the size and shape to have a third testicle. That was a lovely major to mild ache for about a month, then went away. So about 2 weeks ago (yes, exceeded my number again for spurts), hit my 3 months and time to test again. Surprise, "we detect sperm in your sample". 155k. Somehow my sperm level is 5 times higher 3 months post vasectomy #2 than 3 months post vasectomy #1.
This is literally a Harvard train Urologist and considered on of the best urological surgeons in DFW. I am literally waiting on a call back as he is conferring with colleagues as he has never seen this happen. Yeah, I'm not volunteering to try a third time. But suspect they will want to study the matter.
So in September of '23, I got vasectomy #1. Honestly the most no nothing procedure. Urologist and I sat there and talked about deer hunting and deer biology. I was easily back at work the next day....honestly, didn't slow me down much. I DID exceed my required number of pops. December rolls around, sperm analysis #1, 33k. Technically in the safe range, but let's wait two months (booooo) and try again. February rolls around, surprise 195k. Uhh this is going the wrong way.
The decision is made to do a second vasectomy in a surgical center under general anesthesia. Week out, surgical center calls and it will be about $2,000 not counting the anesthesiologist, but the Urologist was going to forgo his fee. How nice. Crap, I can't afford that. Urologist agrees to do #2 as another office visit. So another co-pay which ends up confusing the hell out of the insurance company.
Since #1 went so well, I decided against the Valium and my wife driving me home, and just went with nitrous for #2. Nut #1 went perfectly fine. Then things went south. Apparently the lidocaine was from a different batch. When he did the "Hey can you feel this" and started cutting, not only could I feel the cutting, the damn lidocaine was lighting me up. There was no stick, sting, burn, and then numb. It was stick, sting, burn, oh crap this is really burning and oh sh-- yes I can feel you cutting. At which point in time I nearly black out, I initially thought due to huffing like hell on the nitrous, but the Urologist said later "no that was from then pain". He went on to state that in 20 plus years, he had never seen that reaction to the lidocaine and had never had a patient fight through the pain I did. Oh yippy. He sent the nurse literally running to get a vial from a different batch. Got stuck again, and it worked like it was supposed to. He finished up the procedure. He showed me where he had taken nearly 4 times the length they normally remove from the vas and yes, he cuaterized the hell out of the ends.
So about a week later, I developed a sperm granuloma about the size and shape to have a third testicle. That was a lovely major to mild ache for about a month, then went away. So about 2 weeks ago (yes, exceeded my number again for spurts), hit my 3 months and time to test again. Surprise, "we detect sperm in your sample". 155k. Somehow my sperm level is 5 times higher 3 months post vasectomy #2 than 3 months post vasectomy #1.
This is literally a Harvard train Urologist and considered on of the best urological surgeons in DFW. I am literally waiting on a call back as he is conferring with colleagues as he has never seen this happen. Yeah, I'm not volunteering to try a third time. But suspect they will want to study the matter.