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Alcoholics Anonymous

308,459 Views | 1180 Replies | Last: 4 hrs ago by aggiejim70
Vernada
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AG
While I won't admit to being an alcoholic, I have struggled for years with what I will just call alcohol abuse. Over the past year (or so) I've become more and more concerned with my drinking and poor choices - basically just knowing the shoe was bound to drop at any point. There's is no telling how many years it's been since I've gone more than 24 hours without a drink.

After coming across this thread I decided to commit myself to 30 days sober. Today is day 30.

Someone posted a quote earlier that hit home: "if I controlled it, I didn't enjoy it, and if I enjoyed it, I didn't control it."

Unfortunately, that's pretty much me.

Thanks to deadhead for starting this thread and thanks to those that participate.
RickSawyer
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AG
Nice! If you choose to explore moderation and it doesn't work out for you come take another break with us!
Swarely
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I told myself that I would make it the first 75 days of this year without drinking. Friday (which also happens to be St Patrick's Day) is the 76th day. Interestingly enough... I kind of don't want to drink again quite yet. I'm gonna go until I decide I want to drink again. Could be Saturday, could be next month. But I feel like I'm in control again.
Pahdz
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Wife and I are giving it up for Lent. Still drinking great tasting O'Doul's lol (which I know some of you consider cheating) but I'm really enjoying feeling great in the morning on the weekends, where previously it was terrible.
RickSawyer
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Pahdz said:

Wife and I are giving it up for Lent. Still drinking great tasting O'Doul's lol (which I know some of you consider cheating) but I'm really enjoying feeling great in the morning on the weekends, where previously it was terrible.


Please don't let other people's judgements change the trajectory of your own self-exploration! A lot of people are quick to share their 'well, for me' antidotes but their truth won't be the exact same as your truth.

Personally I never drank the 0.5% beers but kombucha was something I enjoyed (also ~0.5%). It wasn't a gateway back, perhaps for others it could be. Just keep your mind open and focus on your own humility and so long as you are honest with yourself you will know your truth.

Enjoy the break!
End Of Message
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Quote:

Just keep your mind open and focus on your own humility and so long as you are honest with yourself you will know your truth.
Marvin_Zindler
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Day 1
RickSawyer
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hodgesco said:

Day 1
Hell of a first step man! Day 560 here and I can tell you it does get easier. Focus on you and your community. You are whom you associate with.
simongalicia
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I've been reading this thread since the beginning, and am happy to report today is day 7 sober for me. I had a pretty rough bender in Vegas last week and my body needed a couple days off. That being said, I haven't gone more than 3 maybe 4 days without a drink in 3-5 years. I told myself on day 3 that I wanted to stretch this out for 7 days to prove to myself I can do it. I know 7 days isn't much, but it's the first time in a long time that I can say I haven't had a drink in a week. Feels pretty good saying that.
RickSawyer
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simongalicia said:

I've been reading this thread since the beginning, and am happy to report today is day 7 sober for me. I had a pretty rough bender in Vegas last week and my body needed a couple days off. That being said, I haven't gone more than 3 maybe 4 days without a drink in 3-5 years. I told myself on day 3 that I wanted to stretch this out for 7 days to prove to myself I can do it. I know 7 days isn't much, but it's the first time in a long time that I can say I haven't had a drink in a week. Feels pretty good saying that.
Buddy, 7 days is a hell of an accomplishment. Don't sell that **** short! Good on you.

If you are interested in a challenge, I've been a part of several of the One Year No Beer challenges with some friends (am 560 days here). Its a great program with 30, 90, 180 and 365 day challenges. Helps set goals you would like to accomplish with your time away from drink etc... Really a great program that focuses on mental and physical health benifits from an alcohol free lifestyle, even if its only short lived without the negative connotations that can exist around 'sobriety', AA etc...

I can highly recommend.

-Rick
aggiejim70
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Bumped this one, as my curiosity got the better of me and I want to see how everybody is doing.
The person that is not willing to fight and die, if need be, for his country has no right to life.

James Earl Rudder '32
January 31, 1945
RickSawyer
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aggiejim70 said:

Bumped this one, as my curiosity got the better of me and I want to see how everybody is doing.
587 days today. Staying the course. Gets a little bit easier over time. If I am being honest, a big benifit of my sobriety has been reestablishing my priorities (less measurement on work performance, more focus on being a husband and father) and I have slipped a bit recently. Accountability here... Always a work in progress.

MROD92
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I'll come clean, I had done so well all 2017, fell off the wagon over the weekend. Felt like hell on Monday after having felt so great. Back on now, eating right and working out. I'm down 18 pounds, and BP has dropped from high to now being low normal. Kind of ashamed I slipped up
Counterpoint
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MROD92 said:

I'll come clean, I had done so well all 2017, fell off the wagon over the weekend. Felt like hell on Monday after having felt so great. Back on now, eating right and working out. I'm down 18 pounds, and BP has dropped from high to now being low normal. Kind of ashamed I slipped up
Don't let it get you down. You got this!
agman08
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Just an obstacle to overcome. You can do it. Use it as a learning curve.
Day 225 for me
RickSawyer
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MROD92 said:

I'll come clean, I had done so well all 2017, fell off the wagon over the weekend. Felt like hell on Monday after having felt so great. Back on now, eating right and working out. I'm down 18 pounds, and BP has dropped from high to now being low normal. Kind of ashamed I slipped up
Great job getting back on dude!!!

I struggled for the longest time (years) with moderation and control so I can certainly appreciate the emotional roller coaster you went through here.

It's funny because we are all making lifestyle changes which inherently (we hope) are measured across a long term yet we measure the success on these microscopic day by day measures (which we must in order to reach our lifestyle goals). Don't lose focus on your long term goals and I bet you will be just fine!
aznaggiegirl07
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MROD92 said:

I'll come clean, I had done so well all 2017, fell off the wagon over the weekend. Felt like hell on Monday after having felt so great. Back on now, eating right and working out. I'm down 18 pounds, and BP has dropped from high to now being low normal. Kind of ashamed I slipped up
It happens to the best of us.

Good job for getting back on it!
MROD92
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Thanks everybody, I'll heed your great advice. This is not an excuse, but a reality. It was Easter weekend and we had a side of our family come to our house that alcohol is the lifestyle, with everything. The booze was flowing, and I just wasn't prepared for it. Lesson learned, if I can't be around it and remain true to my convictions, then I just can't be around it.
agbuck
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Been looking for a thread like this... Lost EVERYTHING in 2016 due to drinking. Was a total of a 16 month bender.From the top of the food chain to rock bottom...rehab in January 2017. I am now 97 days sober...
RickSawyer
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agbuck said:

Been looking for a thread like this... Lost EVERYTHING in 2016 due to drinking. Was a total of a 16 month bender.From the top of the food chain to rock bottom...rehab in January 2017. I am now 97 days sober...
Hell yeah man! Congrats on the recovery!
wbt5845
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Hadn't seen this thread before today. Impressed with the commitment many of you have made. I appreciate y'all sharing.

I guess I'm lucky in that I just don't drink that much. I don't like the way I sleep if I do. I go weeks and months without drinking simply because I don't feel like it. And when I do drink, three beers just about puts me in a coma.
strbrst777
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As I scanned topics, I ran across this thread. I was curious, so I read every post. I sense that most if not all posters are serious.. So, I write this post with the intention of encouraging anyone who knowingly or unknowingly is in the "danger zone." I offer the following account of my personal experience: I worked for a major company, was promoted and transferred to the home office located in a state in the Northeast. That was several decades ago. Five months after reporting to my new assignment, the personnel officer (HR) of the department and his wife hosted a social gathering at their home. Present were myself, my wife, another newcomer and wife and several others that worked in the department. The personnel officer's wife, whom I had never met, was taking drink orders and said to me, "You've been known to take a drink, what will you have?" That for some reason struck me wrong...and a little light in my mind signaled "warning." I said, "I would like a diet coke." I do not know why the lady asked me the way that she did...but she did. I will add that for quite some time prior to that event I sensed "danger." From that day until now, I have not had one drop of any kind of alcoholic beverage...and I never will. Offer me $1,000,000 to take one drink of alcoholic beverage, and I'll say, "No..end of conversation." Not being a drinker in business and social settings was not a factor in being accepted by customers or colleagues. And I have not missed one minute of fun by avoiding alcohol. I suppose that this story is a bit untypical, but it's true! I'm convinced that deciding on the spot to say, "No!" may have saved me from adversity. And, by the way, if you want to have lots of money, invest in good stock an amount equal to the cost of drinking and smoking. And if you avoid alcohol, you will feel better, look better and smell better...and you might live longer.
RickSawyer
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strbrst777 said:

As I scanned topics, I ran across this thread. I was curious, so I read every post. I sense that most if not all posters are serious.. So, I write this post with the intention of encouraging anyone who knowingly or unknowingly is in the "danger zone." I offer the following account of my personal experience: I worked for a major company, was promoted and transferred to the home office located in a state in the Northeast. That was several decades ago. Five months after reporting to my new assignment, the personnel officer (HR) of the department and his wife hosted a social gathering at their home. Present were myself, my wife, another newcomer and wife and several others that worked in the department. The personnel officer's wife, whom I had never met, was taking drink orders and said to me, "You've been known to take a drink, what will you have?" That for some reason struck me wrong...and a little light in my mind signaled "warning." I said, "I would like a diet coke." I do not know why the lady asked me the way that she did...but she did. I will add that for quite some time prior to that event I sensed "danger." From that day until now, I have not had one drop of any kind of alcoholic beverage...and I never will. Offer me $1,000,000 to take one drink of alcoholic beverage, and I'll say, "No..end of conversation." Not being a drinker in business and social settings was not a factor in being accepted by customers or colleagues. And I have not missed one minute of fun by avoiding alcohol. I suppose that this story is a bit untypical, but it's true! I'm convinced that deciding on the spot to say, "No!" may have saved me from adversity. And, by the way, if you want to have lots of money, invest in good stock an amount equal to the cost of drinking and smoking. And if you avoid alcohol, you will feel better, look better and smell better...and you might live longer.


Hell yeah! Great testimony!
91AggieLawyer
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Quote:

Not being a drinker in business and social settings was not a factor in being accepted by customers or colleagues.

This has always been my experience. I've rarely drank and almost never away from home or where I've stayed that day. I've never really understood the social thing much because I've never been affected by it. I think if that does get to be a problem for you, as difficult as it sounds, you might need to separate yourself from those that don't necessarily have your best interest in mind. I know that's easy for me to say, but they aren't going to be there picking up the pieces of your ruined life, to pay your fines or certainly not to reimburse you for the thousands you spent on the stuff. I know those that don't actually drink that much but still think nothing of dropping $25-40 a night solely on alcohol. I can eat well for 2 weeks on their weekly alcohol budget.

I was at a wedding about a year ago. The groom's parents bought a bunch of alcohol for the guests to enjoy at the reception -- no costs to them. But they did hire bartenders. Thank God! The groom's mom got so wasted that the bartenders stopped serving her -- even after she pleaded with them that she paid for the stuff. I can't imagine anyone embarrassing themselves to that degree, much less at their own child's wedding.

I wish she would read this thread.

But with all that said, I do support every effort outlined in this thread.
aggiejim70
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91AggieLawyer said:

Quote:

Not being a drinker in business and social settings was not a factor in being accepted by customers or colleagues.

This has always been my experience. I've rarely drank and almost never away from home or where I've stayed that day. I've never really understood the social thing much because I've never been affected by it. I think if that does get to be a problem for you, as difficult as it sounds, you might need to separate yourself from those that don't necessarily have your best interest in mind. I know that's easy for me to say, but they aren't going to be there picking up the pieces of your ruined life, to pay your fines or certainly not to reimburse you for the thousands you spent on the stuff. I know those that don't actually drink that much but still think nothing of dropping $25-40 a night solely on alcohol. I can eat well for 2 weeks on their weekly alcohol budget.

I was at a wedding about a year ago. The groom's parents bought a bunch of alcohol for the guests to enjoy at the reception -- no costs to them. But they did hire bartenders. Thank God! The groom's mom got so wasted that the bartenders stopped serving her -- even after she pleaded with them that she paid for the stuff. I can't imagine anyone embarrassing themselves to that degree, much less at their own child's wedding.

I wish she would read this thread.

But with all that said, I do support every effort outlined in this thread.
That's right, you can't imagine. If the woman in question is an alcoholic, as defined is the Big Book of AA, when she started drinking the phenomenon of craving kicked in with the idea that this time it was going to be different.
This never happens with the average drinker. All the people that love her and give her all kinds of advice, stick to wine, lay off the hard stuff, stop at three, be sure you eat, etc. just don't understand. BUT, she could walk into her neighborhood AA meeting, tell that story to a room full of total strangers, and they would all understand. Very little, if anything will be done to help her until she wants to do something about it.
The person that is not willing to fight and die, if need be, for his country has no right to life.

James Earl Rudder '32
January 31, 1945
MROD92
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Jim,

You mind shooting me a contact number? I have a few questions?

Thanks Jim

Thanks
Na Zdraví 87
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Has anyone's drinking caused you anxiety the next day or two? Here lately, it's been bad. I need to take a break.
MROD92
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It always did for me, I could even feel it in my heart. Honestly, the first few days off of it were even more challenging
RickSawyer
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Na Zdrav 87 said:

Has anyone's drinking caused you anxiety the next day or two? Here lately, it's been bad. I need to take a break.
I used to drink to quiet the anxiety... and it made me more anxious so I would need to have another drink to quiet the anxiety. It was a self-fulfilling disaster.

It wasn't until I faced my anxieties through therapy and sobriety that I discovered how destructive this practice was to my whole being, self worth, self confidence, my relationships with my wife, children, friends etc...

Good luck. Take 30 days off and see how you feel.
Na Zdraví 87
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RickSawyer said:

Na Zdrav 87 said:

Has anyone's drinking caused you anxiety the next day or two? Here lately, it's been bad. I need to take a break.
I used to drink to quiet the anxiety... and it made me more anxious so I would need to have another drink to quiet the anxiety. It was a self-fulfilling disaster.

It wasn't until I faced my anxieties through therapy and sobriety that I discovered how destructive this practice was to my whole being, self worth, self confidence, my relationships with my wife, children, friends etc...

Good luck. Take 30 days off and see how you feel.
This is where I am at now. I am in a bad cycle and want to get out of it.
RickSawyer
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Na Zdrav 87 said:

RickSawyer said:

Na Zdrav 87 said:

Has anyone's drinking caused you anxiety the next day or two? Here lately, it's been bad. I need to take a break.
I used to drink to quiet the anxiety... and it made me more anxious so I would need to have another drink to quiet the anxiety. It was a self-fulfilling disaster.

It wasn't until I faced my anxieties through therapy and sobriety that I discovered how destructive this practice was to my whole being, self worth, self confidence, my relationships with my wife, children, friends etc...

Good luck. Take 30 days off and see how you feel.
This is where I am at now. I am in a bad cycle and want to get out of it.
Hey man - different things work for different folks but might I recommend something pretty fun and easy for you? Check out https://www.oneyearnobeer.com/ This is a light hearted approach with a focus on mental and physical health, setting goals for yourself to knock off the alcohol for a bit and elsewhere in your life.

I highly recommend it.

You can also chat with therapist or your local AA but I understand that those can sound pretty intimidating this early in your self exploration.

Good luck man. If you ever need to discuss with me feel free to reach out. Happy to share my testimony. 616 days here and couldn't be prouder!
Na Zdraví 87
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Thanks so much. This week has been especially bad. I will check out that website for sure. And thanks for the offer. I will probably be taking you up on it very soon. I have to start somewhere. I can't do this anymore.
aggiejim70
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How 'bout getting back with me. I'm curious as to how it went.
The person that is not willing to fight and die, if need be, for his country has no right to life.

James Earl Rudder '32
January 31, 1945
strbrst777
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Adding this to my first post. After the light in my head went on and at that moment I said to to the hostess, "Diet coke please," this followed: I went to conventions where I visited hospitality suites--and helped man a couple.
I went to many company conferences at fancy places near Tampa and Ponte Vedra, Phoenix, Hershey, White Mountains in New Hampshire, and other places. A "free" bar was open in the evening at each conference. And I went to dinner with customers quite often when I visited them or they visited us at the home office. Some were major players in their field. I do not recall in all of those years-three decades -being asked why I did not drink. I don't know if anyone noticed, or cared or thought it odd. Not once do I recall even engaging in conversation on drinking with customers of my colleagues. And I don't know who else didn't drink. (I remember that most did...a few I still remember because they over-indulged; i.e, got drunk. Not "joining the crowd" was a commitment to myself... and I never "felt out of place." Just saying, "NO!" worked for me. It's gone from, "NO" to "NO WAY!
It can be done.
RickSawyer
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Na Zdrav 87 said:

Thanks so much. This week has been especially bad. I will check out that website for sure. And thanks for the offer. I will probably be taking you up on it very soon. I have to start somewhere. I can't do this anymore.
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