bam02 said:
Awesome thread. I struggle with this and the "social aspect" that has been touched on so much here has been my main hesitation. I always have a reason or a season in the near future that I use as an excuse to avoid abstinence.
As someone who has been alcohol free, the irony for me, the life beer commercials promise you (laughing, friends, genuinely good times) is more common in my sober life. The beer commercials didn't show irrational decisions, arguements, anxiety, regret or shame.
But, you are not alone in those feelings. At 30 days sober I had to fly to New York for a big industry outing that was HEAVILY focused on getting ****faced. To distract others from what I perceived as an embarrassment I grew a mustache (hindsight, looked badass and shoulda kept it) and I would find a single bar tender early on and have a very frank conversation with him/her. The jist of it, "no matter what I walk up here and ask for, give me tonic and lime, I am a recovering alcoholic and not totally comfortable sharing that in this community."
And - I actually never did order a "gin and tonic", I faced my anxiety, ordered waters and instead found a great deal of support from my industry community. I also had a fantastic time, real conversation with many good friends and I truly experienced a wonderful time. Sure, I would call it a night early and not watch the sunrise over a fifth of Jack but honestly I don't enjoy that anyways.
Sometimes the monsters our anxieties create are much scarier than the reality. Gotta test the water to find out.