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Alcoholics Anonymous

96,369 Views | 557 Replies | Last: 26 days ago by RickSawyer
deadhead aggie
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AG
I was wondering what everyone's thoughts were on starting an AA thread for members of the Fellowship, as well as for those with questions in regards to the AA program. I did a search and couldn't find an existing AA thread on any of the boards..........figured the H&F board would be an ideal location.

Would love to hear from some fellow Ags with an interest on this subject.

Thanks.
K Bo
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AG
I'd be all for it! I made the decision this morning that I'm going (at least) 30 days sober.
bigtruckguy3500
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K Bo said:

I'd be all for it! I made the decision this morning that I'm going (at least) 30 days sober.
What happened last night?
deadhead aggie
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AG
Congrats on the 30-day target! I'm assuming you're simply looking for a short hiatus from the bottle at this time.

If down the road you want to make a full-time commitment, please check back-in. Perhaps I can be of assistance on your journey.

Take care.

agcivengineer
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agcivengineer
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AG
I dont have need for this, but i applaud you for your efforts to help those who do. Thank you!
AggieOO
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agcivengineer said:

I dont have need for this, but i applaud you for your efforts to help those who do. Thank you!


This.

No need either, but I go 30 days or so a couple times a year typically. Do it to help with training and/or to cut some weight.

The hardest part for me is no the alcohol itself, but losing the social aspect. It's crazy how much social life revolves around drinking.

Can't help with AA directly, but wish you all the best and more than happy to support you remotely, as much as I can.
dubi
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I think this is a fantastic idea.
K Bo
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bigtruckguy3500 said:

K Bo said:

I'd be all for it! I made the decision this morning that I'm going (at least) 30 days sober.
What happened last night?
haha! well played...

In reality, I have been thinking about taking some time off for multiple reasons, one of which is just to live and feel healthier.
K Bo
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AG
deadhead aggie said:

Congrats on the 30-day target! I'm assuming you're simply looking for a short hiatus from the bottle at this time.

If down the road you want to make a full-time commitment, please check back-in. Perhaps I can be of assistance on your journey.

Take care.


Thanks! The 30 day target is step one. I know I will feel better/have a new & different perspective after that period so it'll be interesting to see my thoughts then.
Big Cat `93
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AG
I'd be interested to hear people's takes on this. I have a family member who has tried AA but hasn't stuck with it. Drinking has nearly ruined him. Part of me wants to slap him upside the head and tell him to shape up, but another part of me knows that it's probably not that simple. I don't drink and never have, so I'm trying to understand what he's going through.
The Lost
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AggieOO said:



The hardest part for me is no the alcohol itself, but losing the social aspect. It's crazy how much social life revolves around drinking.


This is my big struggle too as I can go without it, but when I do drink it's either 2 beers or 10+. I really struggle with the moderation aspect.
Dr. Faustus
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AggieOO said:

agcivengineer said:

I dont have need for this, but i applaud you for your efforts to help those who do. Thank you!

The hardest part for me is no the alcohol itself, but losing the social aspect. It's crazy how much social life revolves around drinking.

This is where I'm at too. Going to monitor this thread to see how others have handled it.
AggieOO
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i went dry for August. I started drinking Topo Chico when it was available. It helped reduce the "need" for a drink when out socializing with people who were drinking.

Sorry OP if this thread is going a little off topic.
K Bo
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My decision to quit drinking is borne more out of a lack of understanding how to deal with feelings (good and bad) vs merely wanting to quit drinking. I have realized I use alcohol as a coping mechanism to suppress these feelings. I have to quit drinking so I can proceed down this path with a clear and focused mind.

Yesterday was day 1 without a drink since about April-ish. I am sure there were a couple days sprinkled in here and there but nothing I can remember for sure. Today was day 1 waking up after a dry evening and man was it a great feeling. I love waking up with a clear mind, no guilt, and a free flowing natural energy. I am most excited for, and keeping a strong focus on, the positive health benefits from sobriety.

One Year No Beer and That Sober Guy podcast are resources I have used (and will continue to use) along this journey.
K Bo
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AG
AggieOO said:

i went dry for August. I started drinking Topo Chico when it was available. It helped reduce the "need" for a drink when out socializing with people who were drinking.

Sorry OP if this thread is going a little off topic.
Top Chico with lime is the ish
deadhead aggie
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AG
Yeah, this is a difficult one. When you sit-back and begin to think about quitting drinking, you ultimately think of all of the activities that you're going to have to give up in the future......happy hour beers with co-workers, bourbon in the driveway by the smoker in the fall, vodka tonics during the eventual Aggie football National Championship game, toasting your daughter at her wedding with a glass of champagne, having a shot of whiskey on behalf of your best friend after you bury him when he passes away.

Sobriety is best handled in 24 hour increments. My goal today is to stay sober till midnight. When I wake-up tomorrow, my goal will be to make it to midnight. Looking beyond this timeframe is a bit too much to fathom.

I can tell you, I don't miss the hang-overs, the guilt, the embarrassment, the regret, the memory lapses, the poor decision-making, and the reliance on alcohol to ease my nerves, anxieties, and down-times.

Thanks to all for chiming in !!

agman08
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I almost started this topic last month! I've struggled with Alcohol abuse for years and last month I hit rock bottom.
Ended up in jail (public intox because my wife had my keys and I couldn't drive THANK GOD) I was to the bar, drank all day and passed out IN PUBLIC. Anyway, I went straight to rehab/detox after being released from jail and went to AA everyday while there. I got discharged from Rehab at 11:00am on a Friday and made the 12:00pm AA meeting back home.
I've gone everyday since and I picked up my 30 day chip the day we BTHO Tennessee!!!!!

I still Tailgate, go out with friends and my wife, go to Ranger games (not anymore since we got swept)
Being sober for me is easier than drinking. I have so much relief. Not worried about cops, destroying my family, disappointing my children, having my assistant pick up slack because i'm too hammered to negotiate or execute a deal, etc etc etc
Drinking became a full time job. The sneaking, the hiding money so I could buy more, waking up in the middle of the night and slamming booze to go back to sleep. It got so sickening.

I now workout everyday (sometimes twice a day) and my personal and professional life are amazing.

I substitute with Diet A&W Root Beer. Still put it in a koozie and such, but my desire is gone!

AA truly works. Being held accountable and having the milestones to look forward to are great.
Also, hearing everyone share each day just helps knowing you're not alone and won't be judged by anyone!!!

I attend Graves Street in Mansfield. 12:00 M-F and the 9:00am Saturday. Sunday I try to make whichever meeting I can. The morning ones are during Sunday School and Church.

I'm glad that you started this thread!!!!! If anyone is close to Mansfield and would like to meet up in person for a game, a run or just to talk I would love to! I'm only a month in, but I feel like I still have some good perspective and I am a great listener!!!
deadhead aggie
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AG
^
And that, my friends, is the beauty of AA.

We're here to help, listen, explain, answer.......whatever you think you need, we'll do what we can for you.
K Bo
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AG
deadhead aggie said:

Yeah, this is a difficult one. When you sit-back and begin to think about quitting drinking, you ultimately think of all of the activities that you're going to have to give up in the future......happy hour beers with co-workers, bourbon in the driveway by the smoker in the fall, vodka tonics during the eventual Aggie football National Championship game, toasting your daughter at her wedding with a glass of champagne, having a shot of whiskey on behalf of your best friend after you bury him when he passes away.

Sobriety is best handled in 24 hour increments. My goal today is to stay sober till midnight. When I wake-up tomorrow, my goal will be to make it to midnight. Looking beyond this timeframe is a bit too much to fathom.

I can tell you, I don't miss the hang-overs, the guilt, the embarrassment, the regret, the memory lapses, the poor decision-making, and the reliance on alcohol to ease my nerves, anxieties, and down-times.

Thanks to all for chiming in !!



This has been one of my greatest anxieties heading in to sobriety - the (unfortunate) discomfort from being in a social setting while not drinking. Most of my friends drink - some responsibly and some irresponsibly. We have a bond that hopefully goes beyond drinking but it is still a scary to think about the next time they want to meet at a bar for drinks. Additionally I work in an industry that requires entertainment and the majority of the time that involves drinking, sometimes heavily. I just have to keep looking forward and know that while it might be unconformable now tomorrow is going to feel great. If the people I am with can't understand and respect my decision those are not the people I need to be associating with.

I really like this 24 hour approach. I am going to adopt this mindset in such early stages of the process.

Thanks!
GnomeTalmbout
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The social aspect of sobering up from either drugs or alcohol is very difficult.

What if all your friends drink? do drugs? You leave rehab and slip right back into the same old patterns.

My husband has been sober 13 years and I am thankful every single day. He attends 1 meeting a week, but for the 1st year it was 1 meeting a day. I remember when he cut back to 6 and I was so very scared he would relapse.

Then over the years he cut back a meeting here and there until it just became one. Oddly I am much more uncomfortable in a drunken setting; I immediately want to leave because it scares me. It makes me think of the bad times and I don't ever want to live with a drunk again.

I congratulate those that are sober and want to encourage those that are thinking about it!
agman08
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Sadly and gladly I had my best month of real estate in my career this past month and nearly 2 weeks of that I was in jail and rehab. I doubled my productivity in half the time.

It's never too late.

People ask me, "will you ever drink again"
I ALWAYS say, "not today I'm not" and then I smile real big.

The windshield on your car is bigger than your rearview mirror for a reason! Look forward and don't dwell on the past. Learn from the past but don't let it haunt you. Stay positive.
SoupNazi2001
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AG
deadhead aggie said:

Yeah, this is a difficult one. When you sit-back and begin to think about quitting drinking, you ultimately think of all of the activities that you're going to have to give up in the future......happy hour beers with co-workers, bourbon in the driveway by the smoker in the fall, vodka tonics during the eventual Aggie football National Championship game, toasting your daughter at her wedding with a glass of champagne, having a shot of whiskey on behalf of your best friend after you bury him when he passes away.

Sobriety is best handled in 24 hour increments. My goal today is to stay sober till midnight. When I wake-up tomorrow, my goal will be to make it to midnight. Looking beyond this timeframe is a bit too much to fathom.

I can tell you, I don't miss the hang-overs, the guilt, the embarrassment, the regret, the memory lapses, the poor decision-making, and the reliance on alcohol to ease my nerves, anxieties, and down-times.

Thanks to all for chiming in !!




Just remember you can enjoy those moments just as much without a drink. Society tells you you can't, but you can. The alcohol doesn't make you happy in fact many times it just hides the unhappiness.
agcivengineer
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AG
So i have never drank alcohol, but i have a younger brother who is a drug addict and attends AA when sober. I am so grateful to those sponsors and people who help him. I feel terrible for him that he has been given this tremendous challenge to battle and overcome. I wish i could take it from him, but i cant. It has ruined the amazing talent and skills that he has. He just recently got out of jail over crazy stuff he does while high, he is in a halfway house and hopefully can be stable. My heart goes out to all of you and your families.

For those of you dealing with social situations, i get it. I work in the construction industry and am constantly in situations where people are drinking around me, dinners, receptions, etc where everyone drinks. My advice...be strong, you can do it. None of those people care about you as much as you or your family and they will respect you for your decision. You can and will be successful without it.
agman08
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Your TRUE friends will love and respect you no matter what. Every relationship I have, even with drinking buddies, has gotten better.
In fact, a couple friends have seen how much weight I've lost and see me running everyday and have started asking me to the gym instead of the bar.
Fill the void with something.
I love going to happy hour and such and not getting belligerent like I used to. I have a lot of friends that finally opened up and told me that they would get nervous to invite me to meet a co-worker or friend because they knew if it was after 12:00-1:00 in the afternoon that there's a good chance I'd be at least 12 beers in.
Hincemm
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AG
Agman,

I work in south Arlington (just north of turner warnell along 157.

Be happy to meet up for a run or some coffee.

I work out at lifetime at lunch or before hitting the office if that helps.

Congrats on your journey!
agman08
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Sounds great. I work out at Utopia in Mansfield. My sister owns it. It's a smaller gym off Broad and Walnut Creek.

Do you work at that bank right there? That's the only business besides 711 and Tommy's Oasis hahaha
Hincemm
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AG
Nope. Little further north. The office park just south of Harris. Pronto...

I always say near Mansfield because people don't realize how far south in Arlington.

When do you typically run?
agman08
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Aha! Gotcha.
I don't have a set time or day to run. Just kind of as the schedule allows. Being in real estate my schedule changes daily so I just try to plan the night before or the day of usually. Definitely need to meet up though. Even for a coffee or tea.
bam02
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AG
Awesome thread. I struggle with this and the "social aspect" that has been touched on so much here has been my main hesitation. I always have a reason or a season in the near future that I use as an excuse to avoid abstinence.
queso1
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AG
My friend's has a guy that works on his ranch. The guy drinks from the minute he wakes and then gets hammered every night. I mean hammered like he can't even walk. Rinse and repeat.

Last week he had to go to the hospital. One day and he was convulsing and hallucinating. Crazy stuff.
dubi
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AG
queso1 said:

My friend's has a guy that works on his ranch. The guy drinks from the minute he wakes and then gets hammered every night. I mean hammered like he can't even walk. Rinse and repeat.

Last week he had to go to the hospital. One day and he was convulsing and hallucinating. Crazy stuff.
He shouldn't have that liability working on his ranch. I wouldn't.
queso1
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AG
I'm sure it's over now.
RickSawyer
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398 days sober today, won't drink today.

There are many paths that lead to sobriety/ alcohol free lifestyle. I know AA is a very tried and true path for MANY of us sobernauts but frankly, it hasn't been the path for me particularly due to some issues that surround my spirituality. Instead, I saw a therapist once a week that had many years of experience with addiction behavior and now I still see her twice a month. Therapy plus support groups (One Year No Beer) plus creating community has changed my life.

As I approach 400 days sober I find myself reaching out more with my testimony when those around me ask for it and this I am starting to see amazing changes all around. Be the change you want to ser in the world, true words.

Whatever path leads any of you here, know that you are not alone and what you are going through is ****ing hard.

Rock bottom is not some measurable point of destruction, it is not failed marriages, destroyed lives or lost jobs... Rock bottom is just that point when you put your shovel down and decide to stop digging.

Love this thread!
RickSawyer
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AG
bam02 said:

Awesome thread. I struggle with this and the "social aspect" that has been touched on so much here has been my main hesitation. I always have a reason or a season in the near future that I use as an excuse to avoid abstinence.


As someone who has been alcohol free, the irony for me, the life beer commercials promise you (laughing, friends, genuinely good times) is more common in my sober life. The beer commercials didn't show irrational decisions, arguements, anxiety, regret or shame.

But, you are not alone in those feelings. At 30 days sober I had to fly to New York for a big industry outing that was HEAVILY focused on getting ****faced. To distract others from what I perceived as an embarrassment I grew a mustache (hindsight, looked badass and shoulda kept it) and I would find a single bar tender early on and have a very frank conversation with him/her. The jist of it, "no matter what I walk up here and ask for, give me tonic and lime, I am a recovering alcoholic and not totally comfortable sharing that in this community."

And - I actually never did order a "gin and tonic", I faced my anxiety, ordered waters and instead found a great deal of support from my industry community. I also had a fantastic time, real conversation with many good friends and I truly experienced a wonderful time. Sure, I would call it a night early and not watch the sunrise over a fifth of Jack but honestly I don't enjoy that anyways.

Sometimes the monsters our anxieties create are much scarier than the reality. Gotta test the water to find out.
 
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