I live on Driscoll between Westheimer and Fairview. I don't care if anyone on TexAgs knows where I live. There is very little street parking in my neighborhood partly due to the huge mega shoeboxes that are going up and taking up yards and curbs - all that is left are private drives.

I used to park in front of a nearby house (2410 Driscoll) until these nasty old lesbians put up fake handicapped signs (four of them depicted in the photos below). Two of these signs are on tall poles and look like something the city would erect. The thing is these lesbians don't look handicapped at all and no one ever parks on the curb between their fake handicap signs. I think they did it to keep neighbors from parking on the street in front of their house. I've never heard of fake handicapped people being able to do this on a residential street.

By the way, these are gnarly old lesbians like the four-wheelin' grandma in Napoleon Dynamite. I've never even seen as much as a limp out of these beeotches. I feel like they pwned me and my neighbors. How can I throw some pwnage back at them?









[This message has been edited by Old Main (edited 7/21/2008 11:37a).]

burn their house down.

Call the city and get the cops out there.

If you do burn it down, make sure you spray paint some homophobic slang on their house so you can upgrade that sucker to a hate crime.

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Get a fake handicap tag and then park in their spot.

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Genius.

I'm gonna keep an eye on this thread. It has potential!

I used to live one block up from you. I knew which house you meant before I saw the pics.

Edit:

Do you know 100% for fact that they erected the signs themselves? Do any of their vehicles have placards or hangtags indicating handicapped parking privileges?

The City does, on a case by case basis, approve handicapped parking zones in front of residences, but it is not common.

I'm sending your pics to the person who regulates such signs. If they are illegal, they will get taken down. If not, they can stay up. Either way, I will try to get you a response so you know what is going on.

[This message has been edited by Ryan the Temp (edited 7/21/2008 11:20a).]

hth

Hell yeah!

Someone please teach these wrinkled short-haired lesbian beeotches from hell a lesson!

That kind of sucks for them to have a bunch new urban dwellars always parking in front of their home. Nice idea they came up with.

You can borrow my hanging tag if you need it, I have plates now so I never use it.

i like where this is going.

you think those people are bit particuliar about the 20ft of parking space there? 4 f-ing signs for 20ft...

Bump for the edit.

Ryan the Temp,

I do not know for a fact that these lesbian hags erected the signs themselves. They may have handicap tags on their car so they can get good spots at grocery stores, malls, etc. I've never seen anyone that looked handicapped at that house unless you count the ugliness lesbo factor as a handicap. Since the signs were put up not one car has ever parked on the street in front of their house - that makes me think this was their evil plan all along. When I used to park in front of their house they used to give me this hellish lesbian-devil look.

First, so they're lesbians - BFD - get over it. You chose to live in Montrose.

Second, not all handicapped people *look* handicapped. Just because they have a hangtag doesn't mean they have a gimp leg or something.

It may be perfectly legit. It may not. I will do my best to find out.

I don't consider the Shepherd/Westheimer neighborhood to be Montrose. The lesbian digs were just to add some color to the post - sorry if I offended anyone. I will say that as lesbians go these are the kind you don't want living across the street from you.

My first thought when I saw the new handicapped parking signs was to buy a dozen handicap signs (like I assume they sell at places like Home Depot) and place them all over the yard on little stakes. Sixteen signs might look a little busy!

I don't understand why the hell they are so worried about that street parking when that driveway can easily fit 4 cars there. Doesn't make any sense to me.

yikes!

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By the way, these are gnarly old lesbians like the four-wheelin' grandma in Napoleon Dynamite.

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Also, very nice touch.

"Grandma took a little spill at the sand dunes today....broke her Coccyx."

Exactly Puddy!

I've seen as many as four cars in the driveway and never one in front of the house. Now the neighbors are scared to park along that curb because they might get towed. These old ladies are the kind that will look all day outside those little windows just to catch someone breaking one of their rules!

[This message has been edited by Old Main (edited 7/21/2008 11:52a).]

The SMV (Slow Moving Vehicle) sign on the front porch is a nice touch.

i really like how you pumped up the part about them being lesbians ad nauseum. it really made me feel your pain.

and fwiw the two signs on the post look legit and the two lower ones look like something they put up.

i don't really see what the big deal is. just park somewhere else.

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i really like how you pumped up the part about them being lesbians ad nauseum. it really made me feel your pain.

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I felt his pain. I wouldn't like having to watch 2 dykes that look like Napoleans grandma making out either.

OMG! LESBIANS!??!?!?!

Here is your answer:

The signs may have been installed recently by the City at the request of the resident (this is a "probably yes". The City does not track every single sign, so to get your definitive answer, you need to look on the back of the sign. If the signs are legit, there will be City ordinance information attached to the back. If they are bootleg, the back will not have anything it.

If they have nothing on the back of them. Let me know, and post a pic of the back of the sign.

rdag04,

There is almost nowhere else to park. All of the huge megaboxes that have been built in the last few years have taken most of the front yards and curb and replaced them with private drives.

Thanks Ryan. So if they are legit there will be a little sticker on the back of the sign?

[This message has been edited by Old Main (edited 7/21/2008 12:04p).]

if you can't tolerate lesbians, mcmansions or parking issues you may want to move out to the burbs.

[This message has been edited by Diggity (edited 7/21/2008 12:04p).]

tag the signs with "MS-13"

One more thing -

For people who are concerned about other parking in front of their homes, you can place "Temporary Resident Parking Only" in front of your home.

Such signs generally discourage people from parking there, especially if they have an "official" appearance, but they are unenforceable and cannot be permanently affixed in the ROW (i.e. you can't have them ticketed/towed). If the City were to ask you to take them down you would have to, but the chances of that happening are very slim.

Basically, it means people probably wont' park there, but if they do there is nothing you can do about it. They are effective in most cases.

Diggity,

I'm tolerating it for now, but just barely. I'm not sure I want to replace one set of issues with another issue (a long commute).

pvsherwood03,

MS-13 went completely over my head.

You don't like lesbians, so ... you moved to Montrose?

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There is almost nowhere else to park. All of the huge megaboxes that have been built in the last few years have taken most of the front yards and curb and replaced them with private drives.

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I side with the Lesbians. Streets were made for driving and not parking. Looking out my front window, I would not want to seen some PSBs or whitey mcskulker's suv in front of my house.

Ryan the Temp,

I don't like gnarly four-wheelin' grandma lesbians like the ones from Napoleon Dynamite who put a bunch of handicapped parking signs in their rather small yard. As I stated earlier I don't consider the Shepherd/Westheimer neighborhood to be Montrose.

As far as my car it is a small sporty two-seater not a huge white PSB SUV or anything like that.

[This message has been edited by Old Main (edited 7/21/2008 12:13p).]