I don't know what today will bring, but I just wanted to shout out the patron saint of this thread for all the incredible work he's done for us this year and every year. Apologies for the watermark. Got a new computer, didn't know it would try to make me buy the software until I was 99% done!
Dodgers fans woke up this morning with visions of Juan Soto dancing in their heads and found Joey Gallo in their stocking.
It's a crying shame that the Dodgers left Brooklyn--Joey could have just hopped the 2 train to a different set of New Yorkers screaming obscenities at him, while his parents clean out his apartment.
But, anyway, on to bigger and better things. It's:
HOLLYWOOD DONKEY!!!
No material on this site is intended to be a substitute for professional medical advice, diagnosis or treatment. See full Medical Disclaimer.
While it seems unlikely Gallo would become an everyday player for the Dodgers especially with a .102 batting average and .390 OPS against left-handed pitching this year he does give them more depth at a time when they are dealing with injuries to Chris Taylor and Justin Turner, and could perhaps be an option for a platoon role in left field or at designated hitter.
If a simple curse from a filthy goat could keep the Cubs from the World Series for 71 years, what can be expected from the curse of a Great Donkey? The doom of the Yankees is foreseen--they will not win another championship in the lives of our grandchildren!
Prior to the feckless trade of our Joseph, this year's Yankees squad was 70-34 and had a 12 game lead in the AL East. After parting ways with the Donkey, the Yankees are 0-2. The members of their pitching staff, no doubt beset with anxiety about being anointed as the new worst player on the team and facing the ire of the denizens of The Bronx, has given up 15 runs since the trade deadline.
Extrapolating these results to the rest of the year, we can project that the Yankees will finish 70-92 and lose the division by 17 games to the Toronto Blue Birds.
In the meantime, the Los Angeles Dodgers begin their march to what now appears to be a certain world title tonight, with the best record in baseball and an offense fortified with Big Donkey brand WHIFF POWER!!
Oddly, Joey is not in the lineup tonight. Perhaps he is sitting out the game out of respect for the great Vin Scully (R.I.P.).
No material on this site is intended to be a substitute for professional medical advice, diagnosis or treatment. See full Medical Disclaimer.
Donkey shows off his outstanding versatility in his first start in Dodger blue, with a K looking and a K swinging!
His slash lines in his Dodgers career to date are .250/.250./.250. Amazing what getting away from Aaron Boone can do! The Donkey-fortified Dodgers are 2-0 since adding Joey.
No material on this site is intended to be a substitute for professional medical advice, diagnosis or treatment. See full Medical Disclaimer.
I'm starting to wonder about Dave Roberts, too. Playing Joey 1 out of every 3 games isn't going to help his confidence. Joey needs 2 strikeouts a day to keep his head in play.
No material on this site is intended to be a substitute for professional medical advice, diagnosis or treatment. See full Medical Disclaimer.
0-5 without King Donkey. The Dodgers are, of course, undefeated since the trade going into tonight's game, as Donkey prepares to strike out against Yu Darvish!
No material on this site is intended to be a substitute for professional medical advice, diagnosis or treatment. See full Medical Disclaimer.
If ever there were a team that knew how to embrace the suck, well, it's the Oakland Athletics. But right after them it's the Cubs! Big Franny is ready to get back to doing what he does best!
The Big Donkey is in the lineup again tonight against the Minnesota Twins, batting 8th--the second clean-up hitter!
His stats in four games (all wins, naturally) since coming to the Dodgers: .200/.200/.200 with six big strikeouts. The rest of the Dodgers are clearly benefitting from watching pitches as Joey flails wildly at them.
No material on this site is intended to be a substitute for professional medical advice, diagnosis or treatment. See full Medical Disclaimer.
It's a pleasure to see what consistent playing time is doing for Joey. He added two more strikeouts today, as he has done in every start with the Dodgers. He did accidentally hit a double, raising his Dodger OPS to .500, but fortunately he is keeping the walks (zero) down better than he did in his dark days in Gotham.
No material on this site is intended to be a substitute for professional medical advice, diagnosis or treatment. See full Medical Disclaimer.
lol. he is definitely holding it as a righty would, but still has on his left handed helmet. Probably just messing around on deck or something, but it does fit in with this thread pretty well.
Donkey hit his first HR as a Dodger! Hopefully this justifies Dave Roberts leaving him in the lineup so he can continue to set records with this strikeout tear he's on
In all the hub bub of King Donkey, we are sleeping on the fact that Eugenio Suarez is up to 152 strikeouts on the year and on pace for 218. The Mariners are in the playoff chase, something Suarez rarely had to worry about while playing for the Reds, and he's their best power hitter, which means he'll be riding the lightning right through the end of the season. He's opened up a 9-whiff lead on Kyle Schwarber and is chasing his own personal best mark of 189.
Behold Joey Gallo's extraordinary slash line since his trade to the Dodgers:
.267 (like a regular baseball player hitting .400)/
.267 (probably about a .400 as well--Donkey's unfortunate tendency to walk occasionally has always been a hole in his strikeout game, fortunately one that he has suppressed since moving to Chavez Ravine)/
.533 (OMG! That is a number that is. Actually. Good.)
Joey's OPS as a Dodger is .800--if he wasn't playing the strikeout position (remember, Joey's whiffs help the team see pitches--just ask former teammate Anthony Rizzo), Joey's OPS would be 1.200!
No material on this site is intended to be a substitute for professional medical advice, diagnosis or treatment. See full Medical Disclaimer.
Joey Gallo joined the elite in the game on Saturday night, striking out for the 1000th and 1001st time in his career!
He broke into the top 350 strikeout artists of all-time with the accomplish, shattering his tie at 999 with David Justice and pushing back Jeff Leonard and Shawon Dunson, who both finished at 1,000.
Next in his sights is another legendary Dodger - Steve Garvey - at 1,003 whiffs.
Joey continued to guide the red-hot Dodgers to victory after victory on Saturday night, hitting his second NL Home Run and more importantly striking out twice in 13-3 win over the Kansas City Royals.
As explained on this thread by numerous posters, getting away from clubhouse cancer Aaron Boone was all Joey G has needed to turn his career around. Since being acquired on August 4th, he's hitting .263 and slugging .632 for an OPS of .932 and has struck out 10 times in 19 at-bats.
This is the King Donkey that the fans have missed. This is the kid who gets asses in the seats. I couldn't hate the Dodgers any more if they were managed by Hitler's ghost, but thank god they saw the light and made pulled the trigger on the trade for Jose Rooster!
Interesting side note, Joey has now played for two franchises - the Dodgers and the Yankees - who have combined for THIRTY FOUR world championships! And if you include his original team, the Texas Rangers, in that group, that's three teams that have combined for THIRTY FOUR world championships!
