What the absolute ****

77,754 Views | 459 Replies | Last: 2 yr ago by BQ_90
Madman
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In reply to David_Puddy • 10:37a, 11/4/21
AG
David_Puddy said:
Tom Doniphon said:


Anyone have a link on the World Wide Web where I can go see her sans Dr. K's favorite emoji?


https://instagr.am/p/CV2hc9OADkE
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Tom Doniphon
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10:54a, 11/4/21
Damn it
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Sea Speed
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In reply to Tom Doniphon • 11:16a, 11/4/21
AG
Tom Doniphon said:
Damn it


God bless the internet
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SchizoAg
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In reply to David_Puddy • 11:23a, 11/4/21
AG
David_Puddy said:
Tom Doniphon said:


Anyone have a link on the World Wide Web where I can go see her sans Dr. K's favorite emoji?
No, here's the original facebook post: https://m.facebook.com/poleassassin/photos/a.1081478561970952/1422976507821154/

You can tell she is wearing some purple garment. Probably just didn't like it because she thought it made her look fat or something.
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Sea Speed
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In reply to SchizoAg • 11:28a, 11/4/21
AG
Got some pasties pics just a couple clicks to the right.
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David_Puddy
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In reply to Madman • 11:49a, 11/4/21
AG
Madman said:
David_Puddy said:
Tom Doniphon said:


Anyone have a link on the World Wide Web where I can go see her sans Dr. K's favorite emoji?


https://instagr.am/p/CV2hc9OADkE


You win the internet for today
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HTownAg98
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12:13p, 11/4/21
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HeyMoe
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3:44p, 11/4/21
AG
The Austin American Statesman headline was better....

Austin Animal Services investigating report that child was bit by monkey tied to Texas assistant coach

https://www.statesman.com/story/news/2021/11/02/texas-coach-jeff-banks-monkey-bite-report-turns-investigation-danielle-thomas/6256278001/

Now the monkey was tied to Banks at the time. This story keeps getting better.
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Sea Speed
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In reply to HeyMoe • 3:48p, 11/4/21
AG
They dont mean literally tied to the coach, Moe.
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HeyMoe
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In reply to Sea Speed • 3:53p, 11/4/21
AG
Sea Speed said:
They dont mean literally tied to the coach, Moe.
You sure about that?

This is tu, after all.

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unimboti nkum
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4:29p, 11/4/21
AG

Quote:
"Neither did I know anything about a bite! Until a doctor of neighborhood told me."

Any doctors of neighborhood on here with expertise on monkey bites?
Soso nikinombiki maaki dii.
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agent-maroon
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In reply to unimboti nkum • 4:31p, 11/4/21
AG
They hurt like hell. That's all I got.
No material on this site is intended to be a substitute for professional medical advice, diagnosis or treatment. See full Medical Disclaimer.
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AgCat93
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In reply to unimboti nkum • 6:01p, 11/4/21
AG
unimboti nkum said:

Quote:
"Neither did I know anything about a bite! Until a doctor of neighborhood told me."

Any doctors of neighborhood on here with expertise on monkey bites?

51 years on this planet and this is the first time I have ever heard the term, "doctor of neighborhood."
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HeyMoe
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6:17p, 11/4/21
AG
"Monkey Bite.....Monkey Bite.... Monkey jump up and bite my kid....."
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Tom Doniphon
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6:18p, 11/4/21
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HeyMoe
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In reply to Tom Doniphon • 6:29p, 11/4/21
AG
Tom Doniphon said:
Kid. The Other White Meat.
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HeyMoe
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6:58p, 11/4/21
AG
Ventured over to the Windows95-built website that is Surly Horns to see how the Sodomites were handling this and found some Tech-Level Aggie-Blaming there....

Apparently, Sumlin built a VIP Stripper room complete with a pole in the A&M football building .....



******* In Sumlin's last year, Banks and like 5 of the other coaches were all going through divorces or heading there. It was obviously a program and people in disarray. Fisher arrives in the aftermath and he had to "fix" a part of their offices. Apparently, Sumlin had contractors come in at some point and overhaul an area that was either extra space or conference rooms or some ***** They had shag carpeting brought in, a stripper pole installed, a bar, club lighting, and numerous partitioned areas with couches.
Yeah, Sumlin built a private strip club in the ATM athletic facilities. They began bussing in strippers from Houston and specifically, the main club of choice is the one up 290 towards the Highway 6 cutoff. I can't remember the name of it but one of you degenerates will know.
How did Banks and "Dani" meet and begin dating? You guessed it. She was regularly coming in to dance for major $$ at Club Kyle. Dude dumped his wife and 3-4 kids for her and promptly left them back in BCS when he got the call to go to Bama.********



So evidently this is all Aggies fault. I'm assuming the monkey came from the Vet School; some sort of weird animal experiment gone haywire.
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AgBQ-00
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In reply to HeyMoe • 7:29p, 11/4/21
AG
So if that is true...and sark worked with the guy while he was openly with pole assassin monkey family situation...why did Sark bring him along? Sorry sips. This is your clown show. Hope you have your size 53 quintuple e's laced tightly. The pies to the face are going to get messy.
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West Point Aggie
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7:36p, 11/4/21
AG
Poor tea sips! If you ventured to surly sips you might want check your pc/Mac, tablet or phone for malware…that place looks as backwards as that fan base!
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agent-maroon
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In reply to HeyMoe • 8:08p, 11/4/21
AG
Quote:
So evidently this is all Aggies fault.
Fault? If we're the reason that sip is in a complete meltdown, then I believe the correct statement is:

"So evidently this is all to the Aggies credit"
No material on this site is intended to be a substitute for professional medical advice, diagnosis or treatment. See full Medical Disclaimer.
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Potcake
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In reply to HTownAg98 • 8:28p, 11/4/21
AG
Bitey the Monkey
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Potcake
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In reply to David_Puddy • 8:35p, 11/4/21
AG
David_Puddy said:
Tom Doniphon said:


Anyone have a link on the World Wide Web where I can go see her sans Dr. K's favorite emoji?

You could probably go to any deli, buy a sandwich, and rotate it 90 degrees and get the same thing. Or just search Hope Solo.
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Madman
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In reply to HeyMoe • 8:37p, 11/4/21
AG
HeyMoe said:
Ventured over to the Windows95-built website that is Surly Horns to see how the Sodomites were handling this and found some Tech-Level Aggie-Blaming there....

Apparently, Sumlin built a VIP Stripper room complete with a pole in the A&M football building .....



******* In Sumlin's last year, Banks and like 5 of the other coaches were all going through divorces or heading there. It was obviously a program and people in disarray. Fisher arrives in the aftermath and he had to "fix" a part of their offices. Apparently, Sumlin had contractors come in at some point and overhaul an area that was either extra space or conference rooms or some ***** They had shag carpeting brought in, a stripper pole installed, a bar, club lighting, and numerous partitioned areas with couches.
Yeah, Sumlin built a private strip club in the ATM athletic facilities. They began bussing in strippers from Houston and specifically, the main club of choice is the one up 290 towards the Highway 6 cutoff. I can't remember the name of it but one of you degenerates will know.
How did Banks and "Dani" meet and begin dating? You guessed it. She was regularly coming in to dance for major $$ at Club Kyle. Dude dumped his wife and 3-4 kids for her and promptly left them back in BCS when he got the call to go to Bama.********



So evidently this is all Aggies fault. I'm assuming the monkey came from the Vet School; some sort of weird animal experiment gone haywire.

The fact that half of the sips that read that will also believe it makes me very happy. You can't fix stupid but you can laugh at it.

And just as an aside, if this really did happen, and it didn't, nobody would choose her or her level of co-worker to bus in. If you are spending money on your own club you have enough money to bring in better talent.

Edit

You think it today's environment you could keep pics and video away from the media for more than 24 hours?
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AggieBand2004
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In reply to Potcake • 8:58p, 11/4/21
AG
Potcake said:
David_Puddy said:
Tom Doniphon said:


Anyone have a link on the World Wide Web where I can go see her sans Dr. K's favorite emoji?

You could probably go to any deli, buy a sandwich, and rotate it 90 degrees and get the same thing. Or just search Hope Solo.

Poor Hope. Every time she gets naked, it looks like her torso is blowing a raspberry
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Tom Doniphon
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4:11p, 11/5/21
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BohunkAg
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In reply to unimboti nkum • 4:13p, 11/5/21
AG
unimboti nkum said:

Quote:
"Neither did I know anything about a bite! Until a doctor of neighborhood told me."

Any doctors of neighborhood on here with expertise on monkey bites?
I'd be shocked if there were any MDs on Old Rivalries. People with criminal records, yes.....medical degrees, not so much.
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agent-maroon
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In reply to BohunkAg • 4:16p, 11/5/21
AG
BohunkAg said:
unimboti nkum said:

Quote:
"Neither did I know anything about a bite! Until a doctor of neighborhood told me."

Any doctors of neighborhood on here with expertise on monkey bites?
I'd be shocked if there were any MDs on Old Rivalries. People with criminal records, yes.....medical degrees, not so much.

MDs yes there are some. NDs? Not so much...
No material on this site is intended to be a substitute for professional medical advice, diagnosis or treatment. See full Medical Disclaimer.
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BohunkAg
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In reply to HeyMoe • 4:17p, 11/5/21
AG
HeyMoe said:
Tom Doniphon said:
Kid. The Other White Meat.
GD Moe.
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BohunkAg
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In reply to agent-maroon • 4:18p, 11/5/21
AG
agent-maroon said:
BohunkAg said:
unimboti nkum said:

Quote:
"Neither did I know anything about a bite! Until a doctor of neighborhood told me."

Any doctors of neighborhood on here with expertise on monkey bites?
I'd be shocked if there were any MDs on Old Rivalries. People with criminal records, yes.....medical degrees, not so much.

MDs yes there are some. NDs? Not so much...
Come on man, you're a proctologist or something aren't you?
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agent-maroon
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In reply to BohunkAg • 4:24p, 11/5/21
AG
No. At least not professionally anyways.
No material on this site is intended to be a substitute for professional medical advice, diagnosis or treatment. See full Medical Disclaimer.
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BQ_90
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In reply to Tom Doniphon • 4:25p, 11/5/21
AG
Tom Doniphon said:
Finger food
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Mathguy64
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In reply to BohunkAg • 4:32p, 11/5/21
AG
BohunkAg said:
unimboti nkum said:

Quote:
"Neither did I know anything about a bite! Until a doctor of neighborhood told me."

Any doctors of neighborhood on here with expertise on monkey bites?
I'd be shocked if there were any MDs on Old Rivalries. People with criminal records, yes.....medical degrees, not so much.


Poor Dermdoc. Outta sight outta mind.
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BeowulfShaeffer
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In reply to BohunkAg • 4:37p, 11/5/21
AG
BohunkAg said:
unimboti nkum said:

Quote:
"Neither did I know anything about a bite! Until a doctor of neighborhood told me."

Any doctors of neighborhood on here with expertise on monkey bites?
I'd be shocked if there were any MDs on Old Rivalries. People with criminal records, yes.....medical degrees, not so much.
Haven't seen Dr. K in a while.
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RikkiTikkaTagem
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In reply to BohunkAg • 6:39p, 11/5/21
AG
BohunkAg said:
unimboti nkum said:

Quote:
"Neither did I know anything about a bite! Until a doctor of neighborhood told me."

Any doctors of neighborhood on here with expertise on monkey bites?
I'd be shocked if there were any MDs on Old Rivalries. People with criminal records, yes.....medical degrees, not so much.


There are people on here with MDs. I work in the ER so you guys are Saints compared to what I normally deal with.
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Ag In Ok
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In reply to HeyMoe • 6:37a, 11/6/21
AG
HeyMoe said:
The Austin American Statesman headline was better....

Austin Animal Services investigating report that child was bit by monkey tied to Texas assistant coach

https://www.statesman.com/story/news/2021/11/02/texas-coach-jeff-banks-monkey-bite-report-turns-investigation-danielle-thomas/6256278001/

Now the monkey was tied to Banks at the time. This story keeps getting better.


Now we can add Ace Ventura to the storyline? How many completely absurd characters can be added to this story before before it hits critical mass?
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