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O.G.
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Gotta ask this here because no one I roll with is on TexAgs......but....

Do all BJJ gyms have the same approximate amount of drama as your average High School? Asking because now that I've been around my gym for over a year and a half now, I'm hearing a lot of he said/she said about everybody and everything.

Definitely didn't hear it when I was new, but I swear every week someone is pissed at someone, or someone is leaving the gym or someone is dating someone or whatever.

I don't want to leave or change gyms, I'm inching closer to my blue belt & definitely don't want to leave before then....but damn....are they all like this?
Apache
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AG
Lol, I've only ever gone to one gym.... but we have some.
I don't think it's possible to be in any group like that & there not be gossip. I stay on the down-low about personal stuff as much as possible, but at the same time I don't want to be that aloof old weirdo that doesn't talk to folks. I try to keep conversation to dude stuff like hunting, football, music, movies, MMA etc.
I avoid gossip (along with politics & religion) about others as much as possible. I swear if people would follow that rule this country would be in a better place.

We have a separate ladies class for the past 9 months that most of the gals attend.
Keeping men/women separate cuts down on "intermingling" and that has lowered drama I think.
The Dirty Sock
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O.G. said:

Do all BJJ gyms have the same approximate amount of drama as your average High School?


Pretty much.
Sweep4-2
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Haha.....yeah, pretty much. Seems to be higher at places with A) a younger population and B) MMA fighters though.

I'm fairly oblivious to this kind of stuff though.....so even when it's going on around me I don't notice.

Consistency: It's only a virtue if you're not a screw-up.
Max Power
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AG
After circling this idea for months I finally decided to give it a shot and went to my first class last night. It was huge departure from anything I've ever done before, and it was really enjoyable. There were probably around 20 other adults in the beginners class. I liked the coaches, they were experienced, welcoming, and humble. I was practicing with a guy who was younger, bigger, and an experienced white belt. He took it easy on me which I appreciated. Defense was easier to start doing, offense and escape were just not working out due to the size and experience difference. No rolling after practice, I had nothing left in the tank, but I'll get there one of these days.

Hell of a workout, never felt like I was in danger of being injured, and as a 42 year with bad knees that was a concern for me. Thanks to my hellish work schedule these days I'll probably only get to go a couple nights a week but I did decide to sign up and see where it goes. It was good to be amongst people again and not just working out on my own, also nice that it's so involved you can't sit there thinking about how stressful work is these days. This might be just what I needed.
Sweep4-2
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Glad that you gave it a try and that it was enjoyable! It's a fun sport and it sounds like you're training at a nice place.

I'm always amazed at how a rough BJJ workout can make a bad day at the office seem much less bad!!
Consistency: It's only a virtue if you're not a screw-up.
Apache
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AG
Quote:

It was good to be amongst people again and not just working out on my own, also nice that it's so involved you can't sit there thinking about how stressful work is these days. This might be just what I needed.

Everyone needs it & BJJ is a great way to get it. You get the physical benefits of increased strength, cardio & flexibility. Mental decompression & stress relief. You'll gain the ability to be calm in stressful situations. You'll get a new group of friends from diverse backgrounds.
And on top of alllllllllllll that.... you gain the ability to break bones & strangle people in dozens of unique ways! Much better than chasing a silly white ball around or wearing out your knees out trudging on some hard pan soil or sidewalk.
2x per week is good enough to make progress. Keep us updated!



O.G.
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Sweep4-2 said:

Glad that you gave it a try and that it was enjoyable! It's a fun sport and it sounds like you're training at a nice place.

I'm always amazed at how a rough BJJ workout can make a bad day at the office seem much less bad!!

This.
Max Power
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AG
I appreciate the words of encouragement.

Headed to class 2 tonight, and today has sucked at work so I need it. I'd love to get to go more than twice a week but they only have 2 classes a week after 7:00 pm which is what I need. Work will eventually slow down and they also have 2 classes at 6:30 during the week.

One of the main reasons I decided to try this was mental health. Of all the research I did I don't know if there was anything better than BJJ, not even therapy has helped me with some of what I'm struggling with. I posted about this on the anxiety and depression thread as well to let them know that I'm giving this a go and hope that others consider it. Perhaps the fact I have zero ego is a good thing going into these classes, I suck, I know it, I don't try to disguise it, I'm not big enough or strong enough to walk in and think I can just muscle my way through this endeavor, I accept it.

I'm just going to keep showing up, that's my strategy.
shaynew1
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It has sure become a necessary catharsis in my life. It also helps me make better diet and rest choices so I don't get wrecked too badly.


Anyone doing IBJJF in Waco?
2girlsdad
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O.G. said:

Sweep4-2 said:

Glad that you gave it a try and that it was enjoyable! It's a fun sport and it sounds like you're training at a nice place.

I'm always amazed at how a rough BJJ workout can make a bad day at the office seem much less bad!!

This.


Purple belt in the AM class is 6'1" 340 lbs. I say after rolling with him, NOTHING that day at the office job will be as hard as that.
Moses25
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AG
I'll be at Waco.
Max Power
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AG
Been to 4 classes now and I'm still enjoying it. I'm terrible but it doesn't deter me from going back. I've partnered with a different person each time, some bigger, some smaller. It's hard for me to pickup the techniques right now because of how many steps are involved with doing anything, but I do what I can. The defensive techniques come a little easier than the offensive ones.

I've definitely noticed it's easier to drill with a higher white belt than a lower one, the more experienced belts are more calm and methodical. The guy I partnered with earlier this week was a single stripe and he might have been getting less of the instruction down than I was so it was kind of a mess.

The adult basics classes are pretty full so the mats can get crowded, I'm hoping that as the temperatures drop and it snows maybe that will deter some people. Since there's so many students it doesn't give the coach a lot of time to instruct anyone directly.

It will be nice when work slows down and I can go to more classes.
Sweep4-2
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Glad it's going well. Stick with it and the complex moves will start to get less complex...you'll start to see things as concepts, sequences, etc. rather than 'moves' which makes it much easier to remember, execute, etc.

While the fundamental class is often full of brand new white belts, if you can find upper belts to train with it'll really help. You'll learn a lot more and often the upper belts are happy to help new folks out.

A lot of white belts are hesitant to ask upper belts to train, roll, etc... but most of the upper belts are just regular guys/gals who have stuck with the sport (and are happy to help others learn).
Consistency: It's only a virtue if you're not a screw-up.
O.G.
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Received my Blue Belt last night. Pretty emotional moment for me. I have to live up to this now.



Sweep4-2
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Congrats on your promotion! And enjoy the blue belt experience! It's a 'long' belt in terms of time but it's a really enjoyable part of the journey.
Consistency: It's only a virtue if you're not a screw-up.
Max Power
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AG
That's awesome, good for you!

Last night I learned I need a mouth guard. Pretty sure I chipped a tooth by getting punched a couple times in the mouth by my training partner for the night, who was a bit of a spaz. Really hammering home that I need to try and partner up with higher level guys. I felt I didn't learn much of anything while he was pretty much just laying on top of me, and outweighing me by 40 or so pounds, while I was on defense, and getting punched in the mouth while I'm on offense. I really don't care what size they are if I feel like I'm learning something technique wise, last night I just felt battered without the benefit of gained knowledge. Maybe that is the lesson learned for the class, as a white belt with no stripes the last partner I need is another while belt with no stripes.
O.G.
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Punched in the mouth?!? In Jiu Jitsu? That's completely unacceptable, unless you were leaning more towards MMA. I've been punched many times doing Muay Thai, but never BJJ. Accidents do happen though, so mouth pieces are highly recommended.
Apache
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AG
Quote:

I felt I didn't learn much of anything while he was pretty much just laying on top of me, and outweighing me by 40 or so pounds, while I was on defense
You learned you need some escapes in your tool kit to get out from under than big sob! Were you getting crushed in side control or mount?

You're going to have nights like that from time to time. Keep going!
Max Power
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AG
O.G. said:

Punched in the mouth?!? In Jiu Jitsu? That's completely unacceptable, unless you were leaning more towards MMA. I've been punched many times doing Muay Thai, but never BJJ. Accidents do happen though, so mouth pieces are highly recommended.
He was going across the front very suddenly to grab my lapel while I was on top and he was on his back. It wasn't a purposeful punch, but that's exactly what happened, twice. He apologized, and I accepted because I know it was an accident but I definitely didn't appreciate it. It was the only experience I've had like that so far so it's not one I expect to happen often. And yes, will definitely need some escapes, very true.
O.G.
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Max Power said:

O.G. said:

Punched in the mouth?!? In Jiu Jitsu? That's completely unacceptable, unless you were leaning more towards MMA. I've been punched many times doing Muay Thai, but never BJJ. Accidents do happen though, so mouth pieces are highly recommended.
He was going across the front very suddenly to grab my lapel while I was on top and he was on his back. It wasn't a purposeful punch, but that's exactly what happened, twice. He apologized, and I accepted because I know it was an accident but I definitely didn't appreciate it. It was the only experience I've had like that so far so it's not one I expect to happen often. And yes, will definitely need some escapes, very true.
Ok, that's a little better. At least it wasn't intentional. Injuries and accidents happen, I had a finger broken earlier this year & it was as much my fault as the guy I was rolling with. Couldn't blame him. Talk to the lead instructor about it if it continues.

We have a youngster/white belt in my gym that likes to be a speed demon too. I told him several times that he needed to slow down. He would gas out in 30-45 seconds. All you had to do was defend and he'd be spent. Finally some of the purple belts and the instructor got ahold of him & told him that he had to slow down. Hopefully, he learns. Hopefully your guy does as well.
Sweep4-2
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Yeah, that kind of thing happens. Especially on the white belt side of the mat. I choose my partners carefully these days (but I'm old and my belt level makes it easier for me to politely say 'pass' or 'yes, but were going light today or we're not going').

Recommend you get a custom fit (dentist made) mouth guard. They fit better than the boil & bite, and you'll wear the thing 100% of the time. I have a thin one that I can wear rolling and can talk/coach without even taking it out. It's a little thin, but I wear it the second I step on the mat and take it out only when I walk off the mat.
Consistency: It's only a virtue if you're not a screw-up.
Max Power
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AG
This is just my third week, I've intentionally sought out a different person each time for a varied experience. Also as a white belt with no stripes I don't want to just drill with one person that I get comfortable with. I figure it's best to get experience with different people, but also I don't want to monopolize their time working with someone as inexperienced as me when they should get to work with different people as well. I've seen some of the upper level white belts stick with each other, but one of the reasons I'm doing this is to get out of my comfort zone and that means working with different people. I just know I don't want to roll with that guy the next time.
Sweep4-2
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It sounds like you're doing all the right things and have a great mindset/approach. Each new training partner is an opportunity to learn and to possibly form new acquaintances/friendships.

I pretty much train with everyone, regardless of size, belt level, gender, etc. But the one type of student I often avoid during tournament training is the young (which I'll say is about 25 and under) 3-stripe white belt. Not bashing 3-stripe white belts....just saying that the combo of young, explosive, just enough BJJ knowledge to be dangerous and a large dose of 'still new at this' is a tough combination to roll with.

I'm on the sidelines at the moment with a right thumb injury, and I probably miss the friends, training partners, being at the school, etc. more than the actual BJJ. But I hope to get back on the mats soon.



Consistency: It's only a virtue if you're not a screw-up.
FancyKetchup14
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AG
I feel like you're taking a really great mental approach to the sport. Which is important to avoid burnout or discouragement- keep it up! I started my "journey" about two years ago and wish I had done it sooner.
Max Power
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AG
FancyKetchup14 said:

I feel like you're taking a really great mental approach to the sport. Which is important to avoid burnout or discouragement- keep it up! I started my "journey" about two years ago and wish I had done it sooner.
Thanks, i appreciate that. I'm 42 right now, and having no previous experience I had no misgivings about how quickly I'd pick this up, I know it will be hard, but I believe it will be fruitful. It's something I'd been interested in before but always had an excuse not to. I had gotten to a spot mentally that I needed to do something drastic, anti-depressants can only do so much.

I've worked from home for about 8 years now, and I no longer live in TX. I have zero social life or friends locally. Before the pandemic I found a gym that I did group classes with and enjoyed it but they basically had to shut down, now I have a gym inside my basement where I workout. I tried an adult soccer league but my knees can't take it, I have less aches and pains from BJJ. I work pretty long hours right now, 8-7, and the local BJJ gym was literally the only thing I could find that had something I could do because they have adult beginner classes at 7:30 pm twice a week and they're 5 minutes from my house. I talked to my wife about it, and she was cool with it so at that point I reached out to them and took my first class the week of Thanksgiving.

In addition to learning, which was a big part of this, it's nice to be amongst men. I have a wife and daughter, and I'm not close with any of my three brothers in law. I think it was Sebastian Junger I heard talk about how men need to be part of something they associate as tribal in some capacity, and that made a lot of sense to me because I felt like I've lost a part of myself in feeling isolated. I've heard Jocko and Rogan talk about BJJ ad nauseum and all it's benefits. This is only my third week, I don't know anyone enough to say that we're friends yet but we might get there, there's definitely a sense of comradery being in that room that I don't get elsewhere.

This also isn't something I've been blabbing about to everyone in my life, literally only my wife and kid know. I haven't told my parents, sister, friends back home, or anyone at work. I'm not doing this for any external gratification, I'm doing this for me. I don't care whether they'd think I'm an idiot or find it impressive that I'm trying something like this. This is probably the last thing anyone that actually knows me would think I'm doing.

Honestly someone in this thread at some point wrote that the sport seems to find you when you need it and that stuck with me. I'm sure I could find it if I looked back through. That statement was more profound than that person might realize.

I'm already not the newest guy in class, which is something, even after just 5 classes. I'm going to keep going. I'm really hoping that by the new year work will be slow enough that I can go to the classes on Tuesdays and Thursdays.
Sweep4-2
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Definitely a common theme (wished I started sooner). I had a friend (Judo BB) try to convince me to try BJJ for 10 years…..and I resisted. I made fun of it even. Said it looked like the dumbest sport ever.

When I finally gave in (at the age of 35) and tried it, I was hooked! Been training continuously since. 51 years old now, a little slower and a few more injuries…..but it's been a great time and I'm glad to be in it.
Consistency: It's only a virtue if you're not a screw-up.
Apache
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AG
Quote:

I'm already not the newest guy in class, which is something, even after just 5 classes.
It is rough at first & you feel like you're not learning much (or at least not able to implement the moves in live rolling)

Then a crop of new guys come in & you find yourself able to sweep and submit them....

bigcat22
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AG
Not trying to push religion, but this is a pretty fun event with quality BJJ for anyone interested.

https://instagr.am/p/Cl3_XU3JCmI
The Dirty Sock
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I've punch myself in the mouth a couple times trying to break a few guy's arm bar defenses.They're holding their arm for dear life, their grip snaps free unexpectedly, then POW.....right in the kisser.
AggieChemE09
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AG
I got my purple belt today!
FancyKetchup14
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AG
AggieChemE09 said:

I got my purple belt today!



Nice man, congrats! On what I assume is both the belt and the little one!
AggieChemE09
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AG
They actually gave me the baby as a reward for getting the belt. Doesn't everyone get a baby when they get promoted?
FancyKetchup14
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AG
AggieChemE09 said:

They actually gave me the baby as a reward for getting the belt. Doesn't everyone get a baby when they get promoted?
so that's what that was when I got promoted about a year ago?? I need to make a couple of phone calls...
Sweep4-2
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Congrats on the purple belt and the baby!!!
Consistency: It's only a virtue if you're not a screw-up.
 
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