Given a person can wake up one day, sue their spouse for divorce with NO FAULT on the spouse's part, and take half of their assets and a lopsided custody of their children, should all marriages have a prenuptial agreement?

It doesn't even need to be what prenuptial agreements are typically for, which is usually two people with a lot of wealth want to keep that wealth separate.

It can just be an agreement that if you are suing for divorce for reasons other than (1) marital unfaithfulness, (2) physical abuse, or (3) not providing financially to the family, then you get no assets and the spouse gets all custody of the children.

The government used to do this. Find out who is at fault and take that into account. But today, a wife can cheat on her husband and still get 1/2 of their shared assets, get majority custody, and he has to pay child support.

You're a love stricken idiot if you get married today without prenup.

Yes.

4 pages
2 bans

CDUB98 said:

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4 pages
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I wouldn't have married my wife if I believed she were capable of waking up one morning and deciding to abandon our family out of the blue. That almost never happens in reality where you have a beautiful healthy marriage and then one spouse turns into a vicious monster one morning out of nowhere.

Edit: I wholeheartedly agree with OP that no fault divorce has been a horrible development.

I'll allow the reverend Chris Rock to answer this one

Fast forward to the 8:30 mark and you will realize why getting married at all is a terrible idea.

https://www.youtube.com/live/E5X86wtcusQ?si=0M3vvYWM7eRFQbT5

TacosaurusRex said:

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You're a love stricken idiot if you get married today without prenup.

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I think with most people that's unnecessary. Most rational people can come to an agreement. Don't marry crazy people or *******s.

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Don't marry crazy people

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TacosaurusRex said:

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You're a love stricken idiot if you get married today without prenup.

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Don't marry a gold-digging ***** and you shouldn't have anything to worry about.

annie88 said:

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TacosaurusRex said:

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You're a love stricken idiot if you get married today without prenup.

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I think with most people that's unnecessary. Most rational people can come to an agreement. Don't marry crazy people or *******s.

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If they are mad enough to get a divorce then they are no longer rational. Just not how it works.

Stat Monitor Repairman said:

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Don't marry crazy people

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Some people are sane at 23, and go bat**** crazy around 45 when certain hormone changes kick in, and start making really bad decisions.

I think that no-fault divorce is terrible.

If I were a man in his 20's right now, I would not get married without making it impossible to file for a no-fault divorce.

I'm not going to say I've seen it all because I haven't, but I have recently seen a situation play out where one spouse is going to be a doctor the other a mooch until kids. And then still be most likely a mooch. The pre-nup they are fighting over specifically carves out the doctor's future earnings as protected from being split. Apparently some law firm has drawn up a professional pre-nup for this situation and is claiming its been tested in court.

Remember, they are both young, dumb, and broke. One day they will be older, richer, but still dumb. The doctor-to-be is basically using 'free' in house counsel to defend this pre-nup. The mooch has no money to seek their own counsel.

Much like the mooch's career, I don't see this marriage getting off the ground.

kag00 said:

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annie88 said:

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TacosaurusRex said:

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You're a love stricken idiot if you get married today without prenup.

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I think with most people that's unnecessary. Most rational people can come to an agreement. Don't marry crazy people or *******s.

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If they are mad enough to get a divorce then they are no longer rational. Just not how it works.

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Anger doesn't always play into it. Sometimes it's just growing apart or different goals. Or it could be a bad situation where one of the spouses is literally beating up the other and they don't want be abused anymore.

People are not irrational because they get divorces. I'm shocked that any rational human being would type something like that.

BusterAg said:

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Stat Monitor Repairman said:

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Don't marry crazy people

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Some people are sane at 23, and go bat**** crazy around 45 when certain hormone changes kick in, and start making really bad decisions.

I think that no-fault divorce is terrible.

If I were a man in his 20's right now, I would not get married without making it impossible to file for a no-fault divorce.

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So you think it's only women that go for a no fault divorce that men are never using that angle? Really? You don't think men go through a midlife crisis? Good grief.

BusterAg said:

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Stat Monitor Repairman said:

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Quote:

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Don't marry crazy people

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Some people are sane at 23, and go bat**** crazy around 45 when certain hormone changes kick in, and start making really bad decisions.

I think that no-fault divorce is terrible.

If I were a man in his 20's right now, I would not get married without making it impossible to file for a no-fault divorce.

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There are very few pre-nups that would actually survive a 20 year marriage in tact. Thats a lot of asset growth and opportunities to comingle sources of funds and prove the assets assisted in providing a standard of living for the family.

You keeping the same house, same car, same boat over 20 years in this scenario?

Post-nups are becoming popular as well. I've talked to several married couples who did this. One couple did it in their 60s after being married for decades. They both had successful careers and kids from previous marriages, so they wanted an agreement in place to allow their kids to inherit when they die as opposed to when both have died. At least that's how it was explained to me. I'm curious if anyone here has done this.

At 42 and what I have been through with relationships/divorce, there is a 0% chance I ever get married without a pre-nup. If you are in your 20s with no assets to speak of, I dont see it being necessary. But having wealth and lots of assets, I wont be parting with half my **** again just because you have a bad day and want to leave.

When I got engaged to my wife I had a client at lunch ask me if I was going to get a prenup (he had just been through a divorce).

I thought about it & said "we are both broke recent college grads. If she wants half of nothing she can have it. The end of the day we are going to build this together."

So it was easy for me not to consider getting a prenup.

esteban said:

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Post-nups are becoming popular as well. I've talked to several married couples who did this. One couple did it in their 60s after being married for decades. They both had successful careers and kids from previous marriages, so they wanted an agreement in place to allow their kids to inherit when they die as opposed to when both have died. At least that's how it was explained to me. I'm curious if anyone here has done this.

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This is basically just a rebranding of family trusts. Set up single spouse trust. Both parties agree in writing to the claims that the assets within the trust are wholly owned by that individual, are fair and outlined. Set up one for each parent. Benefactors for each trust fall down family lines. Assets immediately bequeathed upon death.

Broke and broke is just comedy.
Rich and rich is easy and makes sense.
Its the one party broke, one party rich that includes all the theatrics.

Sadly in this day and age, absolutely.

Will not be an issue for me but with the institutional and cultural biases built into the family and civil court system strongly against males in most marriage and divorce related disputes, I can understand the concern.

TJaggie14 said:

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When I got engaged to my wife I had a client at lunch ask me if I was going to get a prenup (he had just been through a divorce).

I thought about it & said "we are both broke recent college grads. If she wants half of nothing she can have it. The end of the day we are going to build this together."

So it was easy for me not to consider getting a prenup.

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This. If you start out life together, who cares. You are broke anyways. Second marriage or get married at 40? Probably smart

Get married when both of you are young and broke. Problem solved.

it worked for me and my wife.

Sid Farkas said:

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Get married when both of you are young and broke. Problem solved.

it worked for me and my wife.

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Ditto

Pretty sure Bud and Sissy at the trailer park in Pasadena were safe from the necessity of a prenup

annie88 said:

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BusterAg said:

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Stat Monitor Repairman said:

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Quote:

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Don't marry crazy people

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Some people are sane at 23, and go bat**** crazy around 45 when certain hormone changes kick in, and start making really bad decisions.

I think that no-fault divorce is terrible.

If I were a man in his 20's right now, I would not get married without making it impossible to file for a no-fault divorce.

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So you think it's only women that go for a no fault divorce that men are never using that angle? Really? You don't think men go through a midlife crisis? Good grief.

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I'm not saying that men don't BUT in my experience and observation over the past 30 years, predominately, it is the woman that initiates and the man gets blamed.I am certain there are some cases where the husband is abusive or unfaithful but the majority of the examples I have seen and/or experienced is where the man is trucking along thinking he's doing the right thing and everything is good to having his heart ripped out of his chest by a harpy. I realize nothing happens in a vacuum but many men don't realize they are in the crosshairs.

Depends. If a second marriage later in life, most definitely.

Hoyt Ag said:

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At 42 and what I have been through with relationships/divorce, there is a 0% chance I ever get married without a pre-nup. If you are in your 20s with no assets to speak of, I dont see it being necessary. But having wealth and lots of assets, I wont be parting with half my **** again just because you have a bad day and want to leave.

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BINGO!!!!!!!!!