***** 2023 Houston Astros Season Thread *****

6,759,438 Views | 114825 Replies | Last: 10 mo ago by texasaggie2015
McInnis
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AG
Porkchop, we've been waiting for you to finish the countdown. No love for Hoes?

L.J. Hoes was the first Astro to wear number 0. He played during some lean years for the Astros and never has gotten his due respect. Had 308 career at bats for the Orioles and Astros and accumulated a career WAR of -0.1. Pretty much the definition of a replacement player.



Wabs
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One hour to go *****es!!!
AggieNiebs
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W said:

Nola and DeGrom shelled in their first starts of the season


Add to the list of Aces with rough starts:
Burnes
Scherzer
Manoah
Mikolas
Webb
Kluber (although hard to call him an Ace anymore)
and Fried having to come out of the game.
The Porkchop Express
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AG
McInnis said:

Porkchop, we've been waiting for you to finish the countdown. No love for Hoes?

L.J. Hoes was the first Astro to wear number 0. He played during some lean years for the Astros and never has gotten his due respect. Had 308 career at bats for the Orioles and Astros and accumulated a career WAR of -0.1. Pretty much the definition of a replacement player.




I had to stop loving hoes when I got married.
AggieNiebs
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So I might have started drinking early…. And until the game starts, I'm trolling the Rangers season thread and they are already crying and calling for Staff to ban me.

It's ****ing Opening Day!!!
redline248
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Quote:

No love for Hoes?
I started drinking at 3:30 and this is probably way funnier to me than it should be
AggieNiebs
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So who gets the first hit today? Home run?
redline248
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AggieNiebs said:

So who gets the first hit today? Home run?
F-ck it. Pena 1st pitch in the Crawfords
The Porkchop Express
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Im going to watch the first few innings at least with the family (hey kids, you can have dinner on the couch if you watch the Astros!) so you guys enjoy and i'll reconnoiter with you later.
KC_Ag14
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We're BAAAAAAAAACK
Ag_07
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Let em be

I'll browse their thread to see what's going on but otherwise leave them alone.

But I'm not big on trolling people so...
Eso si, Que es
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McInnis said:

Porkchop, we've been waiting for you to finish the countdown. No love for Hoes?

L.J. Hoes was the first Astro to wear number 0. He played during some lean years for the Astros and never has gotten his due respect. Had 308 career at bats for the Orioles and Astros and accumulated a career WAR of -0.1. Pretty much the definition of a replacement player.




Hoes Mad
Eso si, Que es
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redline248 said:

Quote:

No love for Hoes?
I started drinking at 3:30 and this is probably way funnier to me than it should be
AM or PM? Only serious fans allowed in this thread
EastCoastAgNc
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I wish we could have gotten gold jerseys in the Framber color scheme
AggieNiebs
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Ag_07 said:

Let em be

I'll browse their thread to see what's going on but otherwise leave them alone.

But I'm not big on trolling people so...



Normally don't post there, but when they pathetically try to post baseless lies about #27, it's just pathetic, and I'll call them out. Then if they cry, I just have to laugh at them.
redline248
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Breaking News from the Mets broadcast: Daniel Bard placed on IL while dealing with anxiety.

Good. F him
W
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note: Bregman has homered on the previous 2 opening days
Eso si, Que es
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30 MINUTES

GOOD LUCK, F-CKERS
Teddy Perkins
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Oxy patches are in gold but look like crap on the sleeve. They are huge and are so stiff they don't allow the sleeve to lay naturally.
Kashchei
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I'm huge and stiff right now
The Porkchop Express
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redline248 said:

Breaking News from the Mets broadcast: Daniel Bard placed on IL while dealing with anxiety.

Good. F him
I got reprimanded for my DeGrom injury joke earlier. But it feels like karma as I'm ghostwriting a book about anxiety and it really sucks. Most guys would just say "too bad" about Altuve and move on. Clearly this guy is struggling. Hope he feels better soon.
Mr.Bond
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Any way to watch online
Im looking for Ray Finkle.... and a clean pair of shorts. Im just a very big Finkle fan. This is my Graceland, sir.


MAGA

RED AG 98
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I'm saying 100-62 for the season.

And Abreu gets the first hr this year.

Let's go!
RO519
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ESPN coverage is fuggin brutal. Showed every second of the White Sox line up introduction then immediately cut to commercial… WTF.
AustinAg2K
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Farmer1906 said:

redline248 said:

Mets batter was just given an automatic strike b/c the runner at 1st took too long going back to base on a foul ball.

MLB has to get rid of this sh-t



It's ironic that the ump made things take so much longer by calling the delay on the runner. If a runner can get a delay, then the manager should also get a delay whenever they come out and argue.
JohnnyTexAg1995
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RO519 said:

ESPN coverage is fuggin brutal. Showed every second of the White Sox line up introduction then immediately cut to commercial… WTF.
i know what the hell!
Marvin
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Teddy Perkins
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Woulda been better coming in on swangas.
JohnnyTexAg1995
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And talking over our intros lol
Kashchei
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Announcers need to STFU during Astros intros
Marvin
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Ready to Reign!
AustinAg2K
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Seriously, what the heck is Dusty doing with that slow ass trot. Fire his ass!

Just trying to work my way into midseason form...
Kashchei
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Machete taking a dump?
annie88
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Marvin said:



Love that photo!
Teddy Perkins
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Nailed the unveiling, no leaf blower necessary!
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