Thanks for the post. Please keep checking back. Things do sound better; exercise aa you are able, don't push your shoulders too hard so you can keep doing what helps

Are your weapons secured?

Update from my wife. She had her first appt with a psychiatrist a couple weeks ago and she had a genetic test done to help identify what is going on and possibly what medicine may be more effective for her. Got the test results back today and was pretty interesting. The main takeaway was that basically her body showed to not be very responsive to SSRIs (Lexapro, Prozac, Paxil) and showed signs of being much more receptive to SNRIs (Cymbalta). Doctor went ahead and prescribed the Cymbalta. She's going to wait to start until she gets a few of her hormone test results back.

Was curious if anyone else has had this genetic testing done to help identify potential matches regarding treatment. It definitely makes a lot of sense from the initial review of data.

I think my job over the past 20 years have given me intense anxiety. To the point where sometimes I have fear/stress of even going to work. Not depression but just severe anxiety where it is starting to bleed over to my home and social settings.

Things that have helped me have been Crossfit about ten years ago and today I do Orange Theory or F45 every day I'm off. Plus get as many miles on my bike as I can. Plus Books and good TV at night. My wife and I had just started travelling to Europe and have been five times over the last two years and that has been great for it. I guess anything that takes my mind off work

About six months ago I went to a Psychiatrist just for advice and he suggested Zoloft. In my opinion I don't think it worked that well and really messed up my stomach and told him I would rather not to any meds but he said try Lexapro before I stop. I actually think that Lexapro may be working. I'm not sure if that's my solution to get through the last 5-10 years of my career but think it's a start.

I'm also going to see another Dr. (Psychologist?) just to talk about work and stuff that I have seen and done there.

Anyway that's my story and wanted to post after reading this thread for the first time. I totally sympathize with everyone on here.

I started using Full Spectrum CBD Tincture and it changed everything

Hey Ags,

Just posting an update. Things were better for a little while but I had another wave hit over the last 72 hours. This one was particularly bad because all I could think about was ending my life. Even at work, I was constantly thinking about how my death would impact others around me and the more I thought about it, the less I started to care. It all kind of came to a tipping point on my way home from work last night, when I got into talking about finances and paying off my debt with one of my friends. He tried giving me advice (albeit in a very harsh and disrespectful way) and it kind of triggered me a bit. When I got home, I was visibly frustrated. I went upstairs slammed my door, and fell asleep for a few hours. When I woke up, I attempted to go to the gym, but I just wasn't feeling it with how bad I had been feeling lately.

My mom finally asked my what was wrong and I broke down and told her that I'm borderline suicidal. Well, you can imagine how things went after that. Lots of "Where did I go wrong", "When did it get this bad", "How can we fix you", "I didn't know you felt this way".

I didn't really know what to say to her so I just kinda starred off blankly. I told her I would get some help when my benefits kick in, but honestly.... Idk if I want help. I get comfort thinking about turning the lights out. idk why, but knowing there is a way out just gives me a sense of comfort. Life has been pain for the last few years and I've completely shut down emotionally. Just knowing there is a way to make it all stop, make it all go away, sounds kinda nice.

Curious if those that have gone keto for anxiety if the impacts you initially felt have lasted if you're able to stay on the diet. I did keto last year and lost a lot of weight and felt a lot of mental clarity but have never heard it having positive impacts on anxiety and depression

Seven, see my post on page 3 of this thread. I've had amazing, continued relief of anxiety/depression while on keto.

Have you been able to keep it up for pretty much 18 months or so?

Yessir! Plenty of stories online and on podcasts of others doing the same.

L-I-A, I went back and re-read your recent posts, and I just want to say I'm thinking about you. That sounds like a tough situation to be in where you were confiding in your friend about your student loans and they were the opposite of helpful. And that sounds especially tough to have an open conversation with your mother about how you're really feeling and she loses it.

Apologies if I'm reading too much between the lines, but your experiences in life sounds a little familiar to me. Went through high school doing what I was supposed to do, got into A&M, finished school, went to grad school, finished that... checking all the boxes.

I wish I could tell you how to find fulfillment, but it's really up to you, brother. Sounds like you may need something just to shake things up. To celebrate paying of your student loans you could take a big trip. Find a new place to live in a more exciting part of town. Or do something drastic and pick up and move somewhere else. Just don't give up. Your Aggie family is here for you.

coop-aero-06 said:

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L-I-A, I went back and re-read your recent posts, and I just want to say I'm thinking about you. That sounds like a tough situation to be in where you were confiding in your friend about your student loans and they were the opposite of helpful. And that sounds especially tough to have an open conversation with your mother about how you're really feeling and she loses it.

Apologies if I'm reading too much between the lines, but your experiences in life sounds a little familiar to me. Went through high school doing what I was supposed to do, got into A&M, finished school, went to grad school, finished that... checking all the boxes.

I wish I could tell you how to find fulfillment, but it's really up to you, brother. Sounds like you may need something just to shake things up. To celebrate paying of your student loans you could take a big trip. Find a new place to live in a more exciting part of town. Or do something drastic and pick up and move somewhere else. Just don't give up. Your Aggie family is here for you.

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Thank you, I appreciate the thoughts. It's been tough. I managed to get a good work out in last night and talk with my best friend. He's doing really well in life and that actually makes me happy. He struggled early on (not the same way I do) and he's doing great now.

It's weird because I know what's wrong with me and why I'm feeling the way I am, I just don't know how to fix. I'm at a point in my life where I have all this education and feel like I know nothing. I have zero confidence in my abilities and zero self-esteem. I don't feel like I can contribute in any meaningful way and that has taken a huge toll on how I view my self worth. You mentioned, go on a trip or something like that. The problem is, even though I busted my ass for years (with not 1 vacation), I still feel like I don't deserve it. I feel like I haven't done enough to deserve the life I want. And because of that, I feel trapped from my debt (even though it's not really that much), and it leaves me unmotivated to do or enjoy anything.

It's like after I graduated grad school, my batteries just never recharged and I've been the most unhappy I've ever been in my life since. It's sad really, that last time I was really happy was when I was attending A&M. I keep getting told I'm in the best years of my life and I'm miserable to the point that I frequently have suicidal thoughts. I probably would have done it a long time ago too if I didn't have loved ones in my life that it would affect in irreparable ways.

I have a doctors appointment set up next week to go and get a referral to talk with a therapist. I know I shouldn't, but I'm really hoping to get a lot from talking to a professional. I'm hoping they will be able to help rewire my way of thinking. We will see.

I have had some problems with it, and I am looking for some support. Do you think some pills are good?

Bump for someone in need

10andBOUNCE said:

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Wife has battled anxiety most of her life. Hard for someone like me to walk in those shoes- never experienced anything like it. Wife had been seeing a psychiatrist consistently- mixed results from standard stuff- immersion therapy, etc. Never got on any meds.

We're both Christians and my wife had a pretty powerful chain of spiritual events occur to the point she was almost overnight a different person. Hard to explain and sounds probably pretty weird if you don't share the faith, but it's been incredible to watch. She's been a different person.

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what led to these spiritual events? Was she in prayer for healing?

How is everyone doing ?

txaggieacct85 said:

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10andBOUNCE said:

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Wife has battled anxiety most of her life. Hard for someone like me to walk in those shoes- never experienced anything like it. Wife had been seeing a psychiatrist consistently- mixed results from standard stuff- immersion therapy, etc. Never got on any meds.

We're both Christians and my wife had a pretty powerful chain of spiritual events occur to the point she was almost overnight a different person. Hard to explain and sounds probably pretty weird if you don't share the faith, but it's been incredible to watch. She's been a different person.

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what led to these spiritual events? Was she in prayer for healing?

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Sorry just seeing this.

I think it was just a lot of her growing in her faith personally and trusting in the Lord. Learning about how God has delivered his people all along the way. She really started to grasp some of the powerful stories in the Old Testament. Sometimes you have to wait and sometimes he brings you up out of whatever you're going through.

Right now it's been a rough patch, but that doesn't take away anything she experienced before. She definitely grew and had a season of really no anxiety. Right now she's going through a season of trial and difficulty and uncertainty. A lot of what I encourage her to do is remember those victories of her past and know that things will change.

Been a struggle for me the last couple of weeks. Turns out I was drinking caffeine late in the day and waking up in the middle of the night with crazy anxiety. I've cut caffeine back in the afternoon and it's gotten better. Hope that helps someone.

My intrusive thoughts haven been lingering around to the point of where I nearly had a panic attack this morning. Gonna see my therapist Thursday. Really thought I was done feeling this way since I graduated