Star Wars Discussion Thread

3,140,274 Views | 30195 Replies | Last: 19 min ago by Brian Earl Spilner
Brian Earl Spilner
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TCTTS
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Brian Earl Spilner
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Yup.
Brian Earl Spilner
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CJS4715
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Brian Earl Spilner said:




The countdown makes me sad, because I am not going until Friday night. The spoiler avoidance is going to require great care.
M.C. Swag
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I can't go until Saturday night. Prolly have to swear off all internet for those few days leading up to Friday and when i see it.
SpreadsheetAg
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I was 6 days early

"TK-421 why aren't you at your post?"



Which brings up a valid question I never thought about before..

-What did Han & Luke due with the dead bodies of the storm troopers and scanner technicians they shot / stunned aboard the Falcon? Carry them back to Yavin?
Flashdiaz
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SpreadsheetAg said:

27

"TK-427 why aren't you at your post?"



Which brings up a valid question I never thought about before..

-What did Han & Luke due with the dead bodies of the storm troopers and scanner technicians they shot / stunned aboard the Falcon? Carry them back to Yavin?
they would have had to stun them otherwise there would have been blast marks on the armor Luke and Han were wearing.

They probably let Chewy eat them.
jabberwalkie09
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Why not just throw them down that giant gaping hole in that hangar of the Death Star?
MuckRaker96
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I'm not going Friday night either so that the people I love best can all go at the same time. Did that for TFA and R1 and both crowds were amazing.

ANd now the hype is real - one of my girls had the assignment in kindergarten yesterday to "draw something you're excited about for Thanksgiving" and came up with "watching Star Wars with my daddy."





Brian Earl Spilner
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Y'all are watching the movie a month early?

Jk, that's pretty awesome.
512Ag
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Flashdiaz said:


They probably let Chewy eat them.
I like this idea.
Ag Since 83
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Not to kill the mood, but it's TK-421
AliasMan02
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Ag Since 83 said:

Not to kill the mood, but it's TK-421


And he's definitely dead. Tarkin was very upset to lose his gay lover.

Not kidding.
SpreadsheetAg
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Son of a - major gaff from this nerd
Brian Earl Spilner
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redline248
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AliasMan02 said:

Ag Since 83 said:

Not to kill the mood, but it's TK-421


And he's definitely dead. Tarkin was very upset to lose his gay lover.

Not kidding.

What is it with these authors making imperial officers gay?
jabberwalkie09
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It's Disney.
AliasMan02
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redline248 said:

AliasMan02 said:

Ag Since 83 said:

Not to kill the mood, but it's TK-421


And he's definitely dead. Tarkin was very upset to lose his gay lover.

Not kidding.

What is it with these authors making imperial officers gay?
He's super creeper gay, too, to the point that surely it offends some people. Older dude using his position of power to exploit his boytoy in a way that if TK-421 had been a female, the Internet would be on fire with rage at the aggressive, exploitative behavior. It's by far the worst story in From A Certain Point of View, just in its execution and story and everything. Maybe the only one that was TERRIBLE.

For comparison, I thought Sinjir (who I assume you're referencing) was very well written.
jbsj9698
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AliasMan02 said:

redline248 said:

AliasMan02 said:

Ag Since 83 said:

Not to kill the mood, but it's TK-421


And he's definitely dead. Tarkin was very upset to lose his gay lover.

Not kidding.

What is it with these authors making imperial officers gay?
He's super creeper gay, too, to the point that surely it offends some people. Older dude using his position of power to exploit his boytoy in a way that if TK-421 had been a female, the Internet would be on fire with rage at the aggressive, exploitative behavior. It's by far the worst story in From A Certain Point of View, just in its execution and story and everything. Maybe the only one that was TERRIBLE.

For comparison, I thought Sinjir (who I assume you're referencing) was very well written.

Ok. At first I thought this was a joke. Are you serious?!?!
Ag Since 83
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AliasMan02 said:

redline248 said:

AliasMan02 said:

Ag Since 83 said:

Not to kill the mood, but it's TK-421


And he's definitely dead. Tarkin was very upset to lose his gay lover.

Not kidding.

What is it with these authors making imperial officers gay?
He's super creeper gay, too, to the point that surely it offends some people. Older dude using his position of power to exploit his boytoy in a way that if TK-421 had been a female, the Internet would be on fire with rage at the aggressive, exploitative behavior. It's by far the worst story in From A Certain Point of View, just in its execution and story and everything. Maybe the only one that was TERRIBLE.

For comparison, I thought Sinjir (who I assume you're referencing) was very well written.
Wait, that's an actual thing in From a Certain Point of View? I've only read the first few stories so far.

I'm going to ignore whatever social/political statement anyone wants to make about retroactively making characters gay, but that just reeks of the lazy "everything must be connected...somehow..." philosophy Lucasfilm abused so much during the prequels. I mean, of COURSE Tarkin's lover has to be the one stormtrooper who happened to have his serial number said out loud in A New Hope. Of course.

Fortunately I think From a Certain Point of View is just a coffee table "read this and then never worry about it actually impacting any other parts of canon again" book. At least I hope.
AliasMan02
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I'm not joking, at all. The basics of the story, before I turned it off, are like this. Feel free to red flag every major problem you see:

The major characters are Tarkin, TK-421, and the mouse droid that Chewbacca scares away on the Death Star. The mouse droid really is the main character, as everything is told through its perspective.

TK-421 is a Stormtrooper who doesn't work as a soldier at all, but in droid maintenance. Because, reasons, I guess. Has his armor and everything, but sits down in the guts of the Death Star working on droids. He has a favorite mouse droid that he has suped up to be really fast that he hopes to race someday.

Said mouse droid was running a replacement part to the torture droid intended for Leia. After the delivery, Tarkin trips on it and falls in the hallway. The damaged mouse droid displays some holo of TK-421 and Tarkin notes how beautiful he is and lusts after him. He sends the droid back to TK-421 to coerce him to come to his quarters to fix something. (Again, a Stormtrooper who is for some reason a mechanic.) Tarkin sends him something as well... I forget what. But it's seriously like some scented bodywash or lotion or something that indicates that he wants to have sex with him. Note that they have never met and Tarkin doesn't even know if he's into dudes.

TK-421 talks at great length about how butch he needs to play it for Tarkin so he can sleep his way up the ladder. When he gets to the quarters, Tarkin sets him to some task that requires him to remove his armor. They talk about how luxurious the carpet is.

Tarkin moves TK-421 up the ladder so he can have better access to him, which is how he ends up on guard duty at the Falcon. After the exchange where Tarkin announces the Senate has been dissolved and Vader chokes out Motti, Tarkin is all fired up and wants to boink so he sends the droid to get TK-421.

Ultimately, TK-421 is dead and the story goes on about other stuff involving the mouse droid but I had to eventually turn it off. Reading it might have been better, but the audio book was unlistenable because the mouse droid does a lot of stuff like:

INITIALIZING
RECORDING
PROCESSING
COMMAND NOT FOUND
etc.

and they read ALL of it. Hundreds of lines of text over the course of the story, for sure.

Anyway, yeah. Tarkin is SUPER rapey. TK-421 is basically a gay guy bestie from Sex and the City (oh, my pores are SO HUGE! Ugh, he really MANHANDLED me. Etc.). I guess because the author is gay he can do what he wants, and he'd know where the line is far better than I would. I just know if the story was between a male officer and a female subordinate, the author would be crucified.

The most offensive thing about it to me was that the guy basically doesn't seem to know what a Stormtrooper is, but he was allowed to write a new piece of canon.
jbsj9698
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AliasMan02 said:

I'm not joking, at all. The basics of the story, before I turned it off, are like this. Feel free to red flag every major problem you see:

The major characters are Tarkin, TK-421, and the mouse droid that Chewbacca scares away on the Death Star. The mouse droid really is the main character, as everything is told through its perspective.

TK-421 is a Stormtrooper who doesn't work as a soldier at all, but in droid maintenance. Because, reasons, I guess. Has his armor and everything, but sits down in the guts of the Death Star working on droids. He has a favorite mouse droid that he has suped up to be really fast that he hopes to race someday.

Said mouse droid was running a replacement part to the torture droid intended for Leia. After the delivery, Tarkin trips on it and falls in the hallway. The damaged mouse droid displays some holo of TK-421 and Tarkin notes how beautiful he is and lusts after him. He sends the droid back to TK-421 to coerce him to come to his quarters to fix something. (Again, a Stormtrooper who is for some reason a mechanic.) Tarkin sends him something as well... I forget what. But it's seriously like some scented bodywash or lotion or something that indicates that he wants to have sex with him. Note that they have never met and Tarkin doesn't even know if he's into dudes.

TK-421 talks at great length about how butch he needs to play it for Tarkin so he can sleep his way up the ladder. When he gets to the quarters, Tarkin sets him to some task that requires him to remove his armor. They talk about how luxurious the carpet is.

Tarkin moves TK-421 up the ladder so he can have better access to him, which is how he ends up on guard duty at the Falcon. After the exchange where Tarkin announces the Senate has been dissolved and Vader chokes out Motti, Tarkin is all fired up and wants to boink so he sends the droid to get TK-421.

Ultimately, TK-421 is dead and the story goes on about other stuff involving the mouse droid but I had to eventually turn it off. Reading it might have been better, but the audio book was unlistenable because the mouse droid does a lot of stuff like:

INITIALIZING
RECORDING
PROCESSING
COMMAND NOT FOUND
etc.

and they read ALL of it. Hundreds of lines of text over the course of the story, for sure.

Anyway, yeah. Tarkin is SUPER rapey. TK-421 is basically a gay guy bestie from Sex and the City (oh, my pores are SO HUGE! Ugh, he really MANHANDLED me. Etc.). I guess because the author is gay he can do what he wants, and he'd know where the line is far better than I would. I just know if the story was between a male officer and a female subordinate, the author would be crucified.

The most offensive thing about it to me was that the guy basically doesn't seem to know what a Stormtrooper is, but he was allowed to write a new piece of canon.
That sounds like some crappy fanfic someone copied and pasted off the internet. This was actually published? Someone spent the money to produce an audiobook for this??
Ag Since 83
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Seems they fell in the familiar trap with those anthology short story collections: at some point, you're like "who cares to write about their lives to this level of detail"

Oh well, it's still useful for light reading when you need something to put you to sleep without worrying about missing out on some crucial detail in a longer story you are reading. I did like the one about R5-D4 and how R2 talked him into sabotaging himself. Poor droid.
AliasMan02
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I still strongly endorse the collection. Many of the stories are as great and insightful as that one is stupid and pointless. I think I like Wil Wheaton's story best.
Brian Earl Spilner
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Edit: Damn, thought it was official. Fan-made.
Duncan Idaho
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Still less gay than midichlorians or the force tree from the comic.
MuckRaker96
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And now I present: Gay Moff Tarkin's lines reimagined and retconned.

"You prefer another target? A military target? Girlfriend, you better name that system!"

"Enough of this .... Vader? Give him a release."

Darth Vader: He is here.
Governor Tarkin: That Rodian I picked up at the mixer on Hoth? Oh my god, can you say stalker?
Darth Vader: Um ... no, I meant Obi-Wan Kenobi. I felt a tremor in the Force. The last time I felt it was in the presence of my old master.
Governor Tarkin: Oh, I loved it when he had the beard and the mullet going on during the Clone Wars. I was feeling a tremor in the Force too. Or maybe a tremor in my pants.
Darth Vader: Don't underestimate the Force.
Governor Tarkin: The Jedi are extinct, their flame has gone out of the universe. You, my big beautiful black bear, are all that's left of their religion.
[answering a comm signal]
Governor Tarkin: Yes?
Voice over comm: We have an emergency alert in detention block AA-23.
Governor Tarkin: That drag queen? She better not be in my shoe closet!"
Darth Vader: Obi-wan *is* here. The Force is with him.
Governor Tarkin: If you're right, he must not be allowed to escape. I'll get my S&M gear. The safe word is ''Lars'
Darth Vader: Escape is not his plan. I must face him, alone.
Governor Tarkin: "Vader, you selfish biatch."

Commander #1: We've analyzed their attack, sir, and there is a danger. Should I have your ship standing by?

Governor Tarkin: Pull out? In our moment of triumph? Will you stop talking and just lay still?

Flashdiaz
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Yeah I'll stick to movies and cartoons
redline248
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I'm never going to read these stories, and this one of the reasons:
Quote:

Tarkin moves TK-421 up the ladder so he can have better access to him, which is how he ends up on guard duty at the Falcon.


I don't care about the gay stuff, but I am not a fan of making someone like TK-421 be in that scene bc of some retconned bullsh.t If they wanted to tell a story about creepy gay Tarkin, have it be anyone else that was stationed on the death star that isn't in the movie.
AliasMan02
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redline248 said:

I'm never going to read these stories, and this one of the reasons:
Quote:

Tarkin moves TK-421 up the ladder so he can have better access to him, which is how he ends up on guard duty at the Falcon.


I don't care about the gay stuff, but I am not a fan of making someone like TK-421 be in that scene bc of some retconned bullsh.t If they wanted to tell a story about creepy gay Tarkin, have it be anyone else that was stationed on the death star that isn't in the movie.


Agreed, but most aren't like that at all. Some of the ones that revolve around Most Eisley are, but some of the stories are great additions and nice accents. Three involve Obi Wan and all are done with the utmost respect and with great insight. Most involve characters who don't even have names in the movies so make great little vignettes.
Brian Earl Spilner
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Just a reminder that The Last Jedi has been finished and sitting in a hard drive for over a month.
TCTTS
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And a cut of Solo definitely exists by now as well. So there are currently two Star Wars movies technically on hard drives at the moment.
512Ag
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Brian Earl Spilner said:



Edit: Damn, thought it was official. Fan-made.

I like it. Reminds me of this, which is one of my favorite fan-made images from TFA.
MuckRaker96
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TCTTS said:

And a cut of Solo definitely exists by now as well. So there are currently two Star Wars movies technically on hard drives at the moment.
Is it weird that I feel really indifferent about the Han Solo movie? I'm excited bout Woody and Paul Bettany in it. A lot less excited about the main dude. Not sure I'll be able to disconnect my brain enough and say "Yes, that's Han Solo." I had a hard enough time with General Dodonna being Barristan Selmyin Rogue One.
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