***** 2023 Houston Astros Season Thread *****

6,531,955 Views | 114825 Replies | Last: 8 mo ago by texasaggie2015
n_touch
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Taken at a Conroe carwash. Not by me siap


JYDog90
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AG
Prosperdick said:

Rangerettes lose! Also, can someone explain to me why espn's homepage has wnba stuff when MLB playoffs are going crazy? That's just insanely stupid. When are they going to kill that league?


My all time favorite thing about the WNBA was the Dude Perfect video they did with Johnny Hekker, the punter for the Rams. Here it is:

https://youtube.com/clip/UgkxiHHfNHF9lohsJv7yiAWgffXQc64Rz5D3?si=HFiqr-gBgZXKm1LC
J Peterman
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AG
Prosperdick said:

Rangerettes lose! Also, can someone explain to me why espn's homepage has wnba stuff when MLB playoffs are going crazy? That's just insanely stupid. When are they going to kill that league?


Bc Disney and all that equality crap. Sports center does this too now and since they started this the ratings are way down. Apparently they don't think devoting more time to the sorts people follow matters.

My favorite family guy quote regarding WNBA "We do it for the fan"
Slackjaw62
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Mathguy64 said:

So. We win today and the Mariners are up 3-2 T9. If they win they very much open the door to that win being a bad outcome for them. It could actually be better if they lose. Do they throw the game?

Please dear lord let that happen. I want to see Servais have to do that and I want to watch Manfred squirm like the weasel he is.
Huh? If the Astros sweep the Mariners are out no matter what. Nothing they can do about that.

If the Astros win 2 of 3, the only path for the Mariners is to win out.
The Artist Formerly Known as Yokel
Prosperdick
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AG
Mathguy64 said:

So. We win today and the Mariners are up 3-2 T9. If they win they very much open the door to that win being a bad outcome for them. It could actually be better if they lose. Do they throw the game?

Please dear lord let that happen. I want to see Servais have to do that and I want to watch Manfred squirm like the weasel he is.
I don't want that scenario. I want us and Seattle to win, and tomorrow the rangerettes, if they get swept, have to root for their HATED rivals to win in order for them to make the playoffs.
Prosperdick
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AG
Slackjaw62 said:

Mathguy64 said:

So. We win today and the Mariners are up 3-2 T9. If they win they very much open the door to that win being a bad outcome for them. It could actually be better if they lose. Do they throw the game?

Please dear lord let that happen. I want to see Servais have to do that and I want to watch Manfred squirm like the weasel he is.
Huh? If the Astros sweep the Mariners are out no matter what. Nothing they can do about that.

If the Astros win 2 of 3, the only path for the Mariners is to win out.
Username for Mathguy does not check out.
OKCAg2002
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AG
Have you guys seen the NL wild card scenario for the Marlins? They were in New York for a game on Thursday against the Mets, and they scored 2 runs in the top of the 9th. It started to rain and the game was suspended in the 9th inning with the Marlins up 2-1. There is a chance that they will need to go to New York on Monday and play the bottom of the 9th to finish the season. They should just finish the season playing MLB The Show.
Cromagnum
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AG
These late night games are killing me right now. I'm spreading dirt to fix my yard and also build a new raised bed garden. By the time I'm done for the day and clean up, I pass out on the couch just as it's coming on. I have literally became my dad whom we used to make fun of for instantly passing out in his recliner when we were kids.
iamtheglove
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Mathguy64 said:

So. We win today and the Mariners are up 3-2 T9. If they win they very much open the door to that win being a bad outcome for them. It could actually be better if they lose. Do they throw the game?

Please dear lord let that happen. I want to see Servais have to do that and I want to watch Manfred squirm like the weasel he is.
I was thinking the same thing, but per the chart, if we win the next 2 vs Dbacks, seattle is out. Their only path to the playoffs is for us to win 1 of 2 vs Dbacks and Seattle wins out over Arlington.
mwm
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Just do what we are in control of - just win. One game at a time.
BTKAG97
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AG
Beerosch said:

Here's the scenarios for the Astros. They've already accomplished win 1. The funniest is Astros winning all 3 this series and the Mariners getting left out no matter what.

Need to highlight the "Astros Win 1" green to show it has already been accomplished.

Added: And all the "Mariners Win 2" boxes.
strohag
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AG
Cromagnum said:

These late night games are killing me right now. I'm spreading dirt to fix my yard and also build a new raised bed garden. By the time I'm done for the day and clean up, I pass out on the couch just as it's coming on. I have literally became my dad whom we used to make fun of for instantly passing out in his recliner when we were kids.


I know the feeling. Many nights I decide to watch a west coast game and make it through maybe 3 or 4 innings to then wake up at 1am or 2am to have to check my phone to see if we won. Made it through the whole game last night though. Almost wish I had fallen asleep and missed the 9th to save some stress.
aggie813
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Dear Lord my liver is gonna take a beating today. Go Ags and Go 'Stros!
tjack16
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AG
Not gonna lie I'm 100% fine with the wild card so that scenario where the rangers get left out is fun given how this has been their dream season.

But I'd like us to just win out and see what happens in the end
cap-n-jack
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TOFA
I was at a wedding last night and it just didn't feel right mining for titties as this young couple was beginning their new life together. I was following the thread though.
Prosperdick
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AG
tjack16 said:

Not gonna lie I'm 100% fine with the wild card so that scenario where the rangers get left out is fun given how this has been their dream season.

But I'd like us to just win out and see what happens in the end
I'm now at the point where I'm done with the hypotheticals and just focused on tonight. Very simple:

We win.

We in.
W
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AG
once the Astros get their second win in Arizona...

the Mariners are in big trouble for the playoffs
Dies Irae
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Man the dookie that Clanton is going to take on the rangers if we win the division will be able to be seen from space
Farmer1906
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AG
Snakes are pretty mid vs 4 seams, sliders, and curves from RHP. Good sign for JV.
Prosperdick
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AG
Some weird crap posted by the Grapesoda lunatic:
Quote:

Feels like the Seattle fans collectively held us down while Scott servais and the mariners just dropped a giant deuce down our throat now we have to chew it up and swallow it.
gambochaman
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Arizona still has not clinched have they?

At least espn table doesnt show they have
Farmer1906
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AG
They have not.
Farmer1906
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Unrelated to our game and race, but the Braves are just 4 HR from breaking the single-season HR record set by Minny in 2019.

We're having a very solid year there too (220). Just 2 more and we move into 5th most by the Astros all-time. Our record is 288 in 2019.

That 2019 year was so broken. 4 of the top 5 & 10 of the top 24 home run seasons happened in 2019 with the bouncy balls.
gambochaman
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Farmer1906 said:

Unrelated to our game and race, but the Braves are just 4 HR from breaking the single-season HR record set by Minny in 2019.

We're having a very solid year there too (220). Just 2 more and we move into 5th most by the Astros all-time. Our record is 288 in 2019.

That 2019 year was so broken. 4 of the top 5 & 10 of the top 24 home run seasons happened in 2019 with the bouncy balls.


Eff it lets hit 69 homeruns between today and tomorrow and break the record
Dies Irae
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Prosperdick said:

Some weird crap posted by the Grapesoda lunatic:
Quote:

Feels like the Seattle fans collectively held us down while Scott servais and the mariners just dropped a giant deuce down our throat now we have to chew it up and swallow it.



Aside from getting pegged by their wives, nobody on that thread could pass a piss test
redline248
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AG
Ciboag96 said:

Man, my ass is puckered so tight you couldn't drive a 9 penny nail in it with a hammer
lmao can I suggest you drink some tequlia
Mr.Bond
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AG
Farmer1906 said:

Unrelated to our game and race, but the Braves are just 4 HR from breaking the single-season HR record set by Minny in 2019.

We're having a very solid year there too (220). Just 2 more and we move into 5th most by the Astros all-time. Our record is 288 in 2019.

That 2019 year was so broken. 4 of the top 5 & 10 of the top 24 home run seasons happened in 2019 with the bouncy balls.



Something fishy going on in Atlanta...... I mean that's how this works right
Im looking for Ray Finkle.... and a clean pair of shorts. Im just a very big Finkle fan. This is my Graceland, sir.


MAGA

Beau Holder
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"Makes you wonder"
Cinco Ranch Aggie
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Cromagnum said:

These late night games are killing me right now. I'm spreading dirt to fix my yard and also build a new raised bed garden. By the time I'm done for the day and clean up, I pass out on the couch just as it's coming on. I have literally became my dad whom we used to make fun of for instantly passing out in his recliner when we were kids.
Hmmm, this sounds a bit too familiar.
JYDog90
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AG
I wish the Cubs played a day game today.

Hard to believe the Cubs didn't have lights until 88.
txags11
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AG
Happy JV Day! I can't wait to watch him shove tonight, here is my lineup guess:

Altuve-2B
Bregman-3B
Alvarez-LF
Tuck-RF
Abreu-1B
Brantley-DH
Peña-SS
Dubon-CF
Maldy-C
redline248
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AG
txags11 said:

Happy JV Day! I can't wait to watch him shove tonight, here is my lineup guess:

Altuve-2B
Bregman-3B
Alvarez-LF
Tuck-RF
Abreu-1B
Brantley-DH
Peña-SS
Dubon-CF
Maldy-C
OKCAg2002
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Wabs said:

West Roxbury said:

Win today. Doesn't have to be pretty. Just get it done. That makes Sunday so much fun
This. Please JV, go out and be JV.


It's time for him to earn that Mets subsidized salary.
rosco511
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AG
txags11 said:

Happy JV Day! I can't wait to watch him shove tonight, here is my lineup guess:

Altuve-2B
Bregman-3B
Alvarez-LF
Tuck-RF
Abreu-1B
Brantley-DH
Peña-SS
Dubon-CF
Maldy-C


Unfortunately this will probably be the lineup.
maca1028
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Not the lineup I would draw up but I'm considering the Dusty factor. I think Uncle Mike gets the day off.

Altuve-2B
Bregman-3B
Alvarez-LF
Tuck-RF
Abreu-1B
Diaz-DH
Peña-SS
Dubon-CF
Maldy-C
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