Dang
Most Dumbass thing I've ever done stories
15,139 Views |
109 Replies |
Last: 12 days ago by Tx95Ag
When I was young at a summer camp, all of us were being stupid and one of the kids was pretty annoying. We decide to hook him / his pants to the flag pole and hoist him up. Mind you, there's about 4 of us working together to make this happen. As we all keep pulling on the rope and he gets a few feet in the air, the rope gives way and pulls the pulley / top to the ground. That topper was probably 10lbs coming straight to the ground. Landed about 2 ft from me - so thankful it never hit one of us / our heads. It could have ended so differently.
Decided to drive to gulf shores, AL from College station overnight. I slept like 30 minutes in my buddy's driveway before we took off. I had been in class and/or working all day. It's a miracle we made it. Had a convoy of 3 trucks. One of which had 30+ thirty packs of keystone in it.
I was so tired that I slept in my truck most of that spring break because I couldn't hang to stay up half the night. I was also the first one up every morning. I pulled someone out of the water. He had passed out on the beach and was sleeping through the water hitting him. After that, I did inventory each morning. I found some interesting sleeping arrangements. Two different days we were missing someone. They made their way back to us by noon both days. Someone else broke a wrist while trying to knee board.
One of the girls in the group drunkenly fell down stairs and her rear-end left two perfect holes of her cheeks in the sheet rock. Hired a local contractor to patch and paint so we didn't have to pay for the damage.
I decided to lay low on future spring breaks after that year…
I was so tired that I slept in my truck most of that spring break because I couldn't hang to stay up half the night. I was also the first one up every morning. I pulled someone out of the water. He had passed out on the beach and was sleeping through the water hitting him. After that, I did inventory each morning. I found some interesting sleeping arrangements. Two different days we were missing someone. They made their way back to us by noon both days. Someone else broke a wrist while trying to knee board.
One of the girls in the group drunkenly fell down stairs and her rear-end left two perfect holes of her cheeks in the sheet rock. Hired a local contractor to patch and paint so we didn't have to pay for the damage.
I decided to lay low on future spring breaks after that year…
Posted on football threads during the season....
I try not to do that any longer....
I try not to do that any longer....
I know a lot about a little, and a little about a lot.
I'm pouring weights for deep dropping and tying hooks, so fishing is on my mind.
Several years ago we were snapper fishing and just got to our spot. I had my rod in the holder, my lure was out and I tipped it with cut bait and I tossed it overboard ready to fish. But I had forgot to attach my line to it...
:facepalm:
Several years ago we were snapper fishing and just got to our spot. I had my rod in the holder, my lure was out and I tipped it with cut bait and I tossed it overboard ready to fish. But I had forgot to attach my line to it...
:facepalm:
maroon barchetta said:
Dang
Can A.I. produce a funny meme that capsulizes the vast gulf between the excitement/anticipation of a trip like that, and the eventual reality? Outdoor-related endeavors seem particularly prone to that phenomenon.
So, back in the day our family vacation spot was a house on South Padre Island that we spent many of summers down there fishing. I was a senior in high school when my brother (who is 3 years older than me) and a college buddy made a long weekend trip down from Fort Worth. We had our boat in the SPI house garage so we weren't pulling anything in his mid 80's stepside single cap pickup. I was in the middle and the college buddy riding shotgun. We left around 6 pm. I remember probably north of the king ranch I couldn't take it anymore so I wanted to lay down. My brother was doing fine on his No Doz and the occasional beer. Yeah, in the middle of nowhere. I decided to get in the bed of the truck and get horizontal. He had one of the cheesy vinyl bed covers that snap along the sides. He agreed to leave the front corner open for fresh air. They basically covered me in the bed.
He pulled over in Port Isabel or it could have been Harlingen to get gas and check on little brother in the back. He unsnapped the cover and i emerged white as a sheet covered in sweat. I often look back and wonder how close I came to killing myself due to the carbon monoxide fumes.
He pulled over in Port Isabel or it could have been Harlingen to get gas and check on little brother in the back. He unsnapped the cover and i emerged white as a sheet covered in sweat. I often look back and wonder how close I came to killing myself due to the carbon monoxide fumes.
snowaggie said:
Spring break in latter half of high school, fishin' buddy and me leave Houston on Friday after school and head for S. Padre. Get to the old causeway pier how many hours later that drive takes. Fish until it starts to get light and head up the beach with intentions of wade fishing on the bay side of the Padre Cut. Get to the cut and make a left turn to get to the bay, go a ways, and the truck stops going. Tires have sunk up to the hubs in whatever slick, grey clay exists there that isn't hard-pan sand. Spend the next 4 hours removing that clay from under the truck a handful at a time to get down to the hard-pan, and clearing a runway behind to get some momentum. Successfully get the truck halfway back to the road and get stuck again. 3 hours of clearing now (we've gotten efficient) and this gets us back to the 'road'. Limp back to the Ol' Surfside Inn 8 hours past check-in time sunburned severely, starved, but too tired to find food. Didn't even catch a croaker.
Ouch!!
My most recent dumbass moment was not raising the door on the boat barn high enough when I pulled my boat out. Sport top caught the bottom panel and bent the hell out of it. It pulled one side off the track and it was hell getting it back on. The maintenance guy from the storage place had it fixed the next morning, but it cost me $350.
DargelSkout said:
My most recent dumbass moment was not raising the door on the boat barn high enough when I pulled my boat out. Sport top caught the bottom panel and bent the hell out of it. It pulled one side off the track and it was hell getting it back on. The maintenance guy from the storage place had it fixed the next morning, but it cost me $350.
Yeah, I feel your pain. Twice didn't put the tailgate up when hauling a trailer……
Will get a used tailgate now….
I know a lot about a little, and a little about a lot.
Forgot to pull the vent plug on the oil catch when I changed the oil on my car.
At the age of eight, my eldest son was tasked with maintaining his grandparents' lawn. His routine included clearing the yard of pet waste before mowing. On one particular occasion, he collected the waste into a bag but set it aside, intending to dispose of it later. Unfortunately, later never came as he neglected to toss the bag into the trash and inadvertently mowed over it. Talk about a ****** experience! My father-in-law was beyond pissed and never let my son hear the end of it.
austinag1997 said:
Forgot to pull the vent plug on the oil catch when I changed the oil on my car.
I did this a couple of months ago…. I'm 50. I blame it on a hangover.
This just reminded me of when my FIL lived in Port Aransas and had just bought a new F150 4WD with a camper shell so they could go down to Big Shell and Little Shell on Padre Island. It couldn't have been more than a couple of weeks old when the 4th of July rolled around and most of the family was down there. We jump into the truck with a bunch in the bed under the shell and they didn't put the window down. Well, ol' Lurker throws the truck into reverse to make clearance in front of the truck for a turn and backs right into the palm tree behind the truck. Needless to say, the window got bent and didn't fit right. I offered him payment to get it taken care of, but he declined it. My BILs rode me pretty good on that for a long time. It wasn't the worst thing ever, but it was embarrassing.
Another one was when I was splitting firewood in the backyard and hadn't maintained the splitting wedge since the previous time. There were some small pieces that, due to not so accurate blows, had started to build up and should have been filed off. While working, one of them broke off and hit me in the upper shin. I cleaned it up and put everything away. My wife wanted me to go to the doctor, but I didn't think it was a big deal. A couple of days later my leg started to hurt and I was really uncomfortable, so I did go see the doc. It turns out i had a staph infection due to the metal shard. A quick trip to get the leg x-rayed and it shows the bit was budged up next to the tibia. I had to get it removed by a surgeon and cleaned out to prevent further issues with staph. The fortunate part was that it didn't penetrate the bone. If it had caused staph in the bone the doctor told me I would have been in the hospital for a few weeks on an antibiotic drip to fight the infection.
Another one was when I was splitting firewood in the backyard and hadn't maintained the splitting wedge since the previous time. There were some small pieces that, due to not so accurate blows, had started to build up and should have been filed off. While working, one of them broke off and hit me in the upper shin. I cleaned it up and put everything away. My wife wanted me to go to the doctor, but I didn't think it was a big deal. A couple of days later my leg started to hurt and I was really uncomfortable, so I did go see the doc. It turns out i had a staph infection due to the metal shard. A quick trip to get the leg x-rayed and it shows the bit was budged up next to the tibia. I had to get it removed by a surgeon and cleaned out to prevent further issues with staph. The fortunate part was that it didn't penetrate the bone. If it had caused staph in the bone the doctor told me I would have been in the hospital for a few weeks on an antibiotic drip to fight the infection.
Was bird hunting in Lometa with a bunch of college buddies and left my Grandfathers Browning Sweet 16 on the tailgate.
Brother took my truck to town and didn't close the tailgate.
Someone in Lampasas County got a nice gift
Brother took my truck to town and didn't close the tailgate.
Someone in Lampasas County got a nice gift
My cousin (also an aggie) had a car for sale. A guy on a motorcycle drove up to look at it. My cousin handed him the car keys but it wouldn't start so my cousin popped the hood, took the air filter off the carb and started pouring gasoline in the carb. He told the guy to turn the motor over. When the guy turned the key the gasoline caught on fire. My cousin threw the gas can away and the fire followed the gasoline all the way to the motorcycle and burned the motorcycle up. My cousin gave him the car.
Same cousin hooked up with an online prostitute. Later his wife developed a rash and he panicked and confessed to her. Turns out the rash was some kind of allergy. Big mistake... huge. For several reasons.
Not the worst by far, but a quick one.
Was doing some carpentry work on a 10' ceiling. Had an old wood 8' step ladder, you know the ones that DON'T have a hole up top to hold, say, a hammer? And I was too lazy to put on a tool belt.
You can probably finish it....started to move the ladder backward, took a 20 oz Estwing right on the hair line.
Was doing some carpentry work on a 10' ceiling. Had an old wood 8' step ladder, you know the ones that DON'T have a hole up top to hold, say, a hammer? And I was too lazy to put on a tool belt.
You can probably finish it....started to move the ladder backward, took a 20 oz Estwing right on the hair line.
I was 3, my sister was 6. We were jumping on the couch. We hit heads. It fractured her skull. Nothing happened to me.
I had forgotten about this one.
I had forgotten about this one.
I know a lot about a little, and a little about a lot.
zooguy96 said:
I was 3, my sister was 6. We were jumping on the couch. We hit heads. It fractured her skull. Nothing happened to me.
I had forgotten about this one.
- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -
AgRyan04 said:zooguy96 said:
I was 3, my sister was 6. We were jumping on the couch. We hit heads. It fractured her skull. Nothing happened to me.
I had forgotten about this one.
Touche.
I know a lot about a little, and a little about a lot.
Haha....I thought you did that intentionally!
- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -
robbio said:
Same cousin hooked up with an online prostitute. Later his wife developed a rash and he panicked and confessed to her. Turns out the rash was some kind of allergy. Big mistake... huge. For several reasons.
We need more stories on this guy
My cousin was visiting our grandmother in Greenville along with some of his kids and a nephew. They had to catch an early flight out to California in the morning but stayed up late playing "42". Finally went to bed and grandma knocked on his door crying a little bit. Lloyd (not real name) said... what's the matter grandma. She sobbed... I stopped up the toilet. Lloyd calmed her down and said he would take care of it. The bathroom was covered in feces, water and toilet paper. Lloyd cleaned it all up. On the flight the next day the nephew asked... Uncle Lloyd, what's the matter you look beat. Lloyd recounted the whole story and when he was finished the nephew said... Uncle Lloyd... grandma didn't stop up the toilet... I did.
AgRyan04 said:
I attached a cover letter to a resume that was signed "Sincerely yours"
Might be slightly better than "Yours Truly"?
My cousin and some of his suite mates decided they were going to go everywhere on the A&M campus that they were forbidden to go. So of course they went into the steam tunnels, they climbed up on the dome of the Academic building among other things. The last place they went was Board of Regents meeting room. They slipped through a chained door and sat in all the big chairs, etc. When they heard someone coming they hid in the stalls of the bathroom.
I was at church the next Sunday and one of the members asked if Lloyd had got into trouble with the Law. You see the Bryan Eagle used to publish that kind of thing.
Anyway, Lloyds punishment was to play basketball with under privileged minorities. Lloyd loved that punishment.
I was at church the next Sunday and one of the members asked if Lloyd had got into trouble with the Law. You see the Bryan Eagle used to publish that kind of thing.
Anyway, Lloyds punishment was to play basketball with under privileged minorities. Lloyd loved that punishment.
Haha...not much better
- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -
Unfortunately my cousin has a gambling addiction. He thinks of it as a hobby but he did have to sell his house to pay off his debt. His brothers and some of the cousins were really beating him up for it. Finally he called me to confess his errors in judgement. When he got done telling me I asked him if he had any money left over. He said... yes. I said, if I was you I would take that money to Las Vegas and win it all back.
I figured he had been beat up enough already. He laughed and said he felt so much better after talking to me. He did get smarter... he quit sharing locations with everyone.
I figured he had been beat up enough already. He laughed and said he felt so much better after talking to me. He did get smarter... he quit sharing locations with everyone.
If we can tell dumb rear stories on other people…
My father in law paid $500 for two fake Rolex watches. Why you ask? Well he had my mother in law go finance a corvette sometime last year because it was the model he always wanted. They have 2008 corvette now that is financed like both of their cars and only mother in law still works. Father in law hasn't (consistently) worked since 2009.
So you guessed it - he bought the fake Rolex watches so he can wear one while he drives his corvette so people think he has money…
They have zero retirement. At Christmas year before last, he asked me how Edward Jones works.
But don't worry, he has a fake Rolex to wear in his corvette
My father in law paid $500 for two fake Rolex watches. Why you ask? Well he had my mother in law go finance a corvette sometime last year because it was the model he always wanted. They have 2008 corvette now that is financed like both of their cars and only mother in law still works. Father in law hasn't (consistently) worked since 2009.
So you guessed it - he bought the fake Rolex watches so he can wear one while he drives his corvette so people think he has money…
They have zero retirement. At Christmas year before last, he asked me how Edward Jones works.
But don't worry, he has a fake Rolex to wear in his corvette
almost got crippled and see my buddy (almost) drown on the same day
Well start with the cripple part. We snuck out and made our own zipline in the neighbors barn. I was third to go and noticed the PVC elbow we were using already had signs of rope burn. That didnt slow me down and I launched off the loft only to make it about 5' before it snapped in half. Not sure exactly but think I pulled off a 1-1/2 gainer and landed right on my tail bone/back and knocked the wind out of me. As I fighting for a breath of air with my legs tingling I see my buddies hightailing it home......to get help I thought. Nope, after laying there for 10-15 minutes and no adults showing up I limped back to the house to find them playing in the pool.
Now to drowning part. We used to play a game called "colors". 2 people agree on a color and then hold a person who doesnt know the color by the arms and legs. Every wrong guess results in getting dunked in the water. We had been playing it all morning and not letting the younger kids play so they were finally getting their chance with me laid up in the lawn chair wondering if my legs will ever stop tingling. When it came my buddies turn the 2 youngest were the dunkers. They agreed on a color and the dunking began........this went on for way longer than it should b/c how many colors do little kids really know? Well every time Joe came up with a guess he was getting more and more flustered, angry, red faced, choking, yelling, etc. After probably 10 minutes of water boarding he broke free and launched up on the deck like and injured seal and started puking up water. Once we all settled down we asked the little kids what was their color and they proudly told us "tiger blue"
Well start with the cripple part. We snuck out and made our own zipline in the neighbors barn. I was third to go and noticed the PVC elbow we were using already had signs of rope burn. That didnt slow me down and I launched off the loft only to make it about 5' before it snapped in half. Not sure exactly but think I pulled off a 1-1/2 gainer and landed right on my tail bone/back and knocked the wind out of me. As I fighting for a breath of air with my legs tingling I see my buddies hightailing it home......to get help I thought. Nope, after laying there for 10-15 minutes and no adults showing up I limped back to the house to find them playing in the pool.
Now to drowning part. We used to play a game called "colors". 2 people agree on a color and then hold a person who doesnt know the color by the arms and legs. Every wrong guess results in getting dunked in the water. We had been playing it all morning and not letting the younger kids play so they were finally getting their chance with me laid up in the lawn chair wondering if my legs will ever stop tingling. When it came my buddies turn the 2 youngest were the dunkers. They agreed on a color and the dunking began........this went on for way longer than it should b/c how many colors do little kids really know? Well every time Joe came up with a guess he was getting more and more flustered, angry, red faced, choking, yelling, etc. After probably 10 minutes of water boarding he broke free and launched up on the deck like and injured seal and started puking up water. Once we all settled down we asked the little kids what was their color and they proudly told us "tiger blue"
"almost got crippled and see my buddy drown on the same day"
Phrasing!! Thought I was going to have to read about this poor fella drowning.
Phrasing!! Thought I was going to have to read about this poor fella drowning.
good catch
Went fishing alone at Matagorda, put in at Rawlings near the mouth of the river.
Got the boat off the trailer, and got focused on some thunderstorms offshore that were possibly going to keep me from fishing in the surf. Decided that they were far enough offshore that they wouldn't bother me.
Got my bait and took off. About an hour into fishing I had one of those random thoughts about where I put my truck keys. Couldn't find them. I had left my truck/trailer on the ramp (the only ramp) with the engine running.
Went back to the ramp to find my truck/trailer parked in the lot and sheepishly told the bait lady that I was the guy who left his truck on the ramp. She handed me the keys with no comment as if it wasn't the first time she had experienced that.
Got the boat off the trailer, and got focused on some thunderstorms offshore that were possibly going to keep me from fishing in the surf. Decided that they were far enough offshore that they wouldn't bother me.
Got my bait and took off. About an hour into fishing I had one of those random thoughts about where I put my truck keys. Couldn't find them. I had left my truck/trailer on the ramp (the only ramp) with the engine running.
Went back to the ramp to find my truck/trailer parked in the lot and sheepishly told the bait lady that I was the guy who left his truck on the ramp. She handed me the keys with no comment as if it wasn't the first time she had experienced that.
Wow
Drove out to the boonies to check out a truck toolbox. 'nuff said.
IYKYK
Beach
IYKYK
Beach
Featured Stories
See All
10:36
6h ago
2.9k
Talent evaluations allows for confidence entering 2026
by Olin Buchanan
20:49
2h ago
838
38:25
31m ago
369
FTM, Ep. 89: Slippery slope between gambling and college athletics
by FollowTheMoney
5:35
6h ago
3.1k