I thought this would be a fun thread. Of course, ask my wife, I've done far more than what I'll list.

A couple of months ago, I was picking up some scrap metal with my truck and 16 foot trailer. I do this as a side hustle to save up for a food trailer.

I was pulling forward to back up again. There was some brush (I didn't see a ditch); as there wasn't a ditch before the brush, I thought it was solid ground. I pulled forward too much, and my truck rolled on its side without the side touching. My back left tire was in the air; luckily, my front right and front rear tire were still touching the side of the ditch, and my trailer (which was loaded with about a ton of metal) was counterbalancing me from rolling the truck.

Also, luckily, there was a guy who lived next-door with a rolloff tow truck. He attached the line to the back axle of my trailer, and slowly pulled me out, having to readjust at least one time. No damage to anything, except my intelligence. When it was happening, it felt like I was in a dream; time was moving very slowly.

Of course, now, I get out check, double check, etc.

I ran over myself with my own truck and broke my leg

Where do I start?

Posted on the Covid board and expected a rational response

I've done a lot of dumb stuff in my life. Here's a random sample.

When I was high school age, after a long day of working cattle in the sun, I rode my horse into the trailer. Yes the trailer had a roof. Yes it knocked me off.

First sal****er fish I caught was a trigger fish. I lipped it like a bass when it got to the boat. Big mistake.

Picked up a 5-6 foot Bushmaster during jungle warfare school in Panama. It was a lot harder to release than I could've ever realized. It was way stronger than the 8-9 foot Boa I picked up the day before and way more athletic

I'll be typing here all day.

I locked my keys in my car about 30 seconds after breaking into my car b/c i had locked my keys in the car.


It was mildly amusing and took longer to break into the second time.

ttha_aggie_09 said:

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Posted on the Covid board and expected a rational response

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yep

December 4, 2002; eager to find out if we were really hiring genius football coach Dennis Franchione I got an account at Texags.com then clicked a button that said "Outdoors".....

changed the oil on my mower yesterday and forgot to close the drain plug before filling

Trusted a fart a couple weeks ago after a crawfish boil.

both were oily messes

also, caught a hard head off a dock in Port A. Tried kicking it back into the water wearing flip flops.

Changed the brakes on the wifes car. Might have consumed a couple beers. Forgot to cinch the lug nuts down. Fast forward 2-3 days and the car starts shaking. I can't figure it out. Take to the dealer, $200 diagnostic fee for them to cinch the lugs. So, about break even on the brake job.
Probably half a million more stories that are dumber, but this is the first one I can think of.

Got drunk and busted a move on my bosses daughter.





Had to find a different job, but we've been married 30 years now…

Married the hot chick with big boobs and more than a few red flags.

Got married at 21

Buddy was restoring an old mustang had left it running at work while ran in to get paycheck. Car jumped into reverse and smacked the building busting the fuel filler line. He drove it home and while it steadily dropped gas he and got underneath and proceeded to replace the line and fix the leak. Neither of us realizing we were both lying under the car with lit cigarettes in our mouths the whole time. Until after we were done.

The first wife.

I've made a lot of mistakes in my life, but my one and only wife isn't one of them. Neither is the boob job I got her!

AstroAggie15 said:

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changed the oil on my mower yesterday and forgot to close the drain plug before filling

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Did this on a new Toro mower. Changed the oil in the grass and didn't notice the new oil went straight out the engine. Ran the mower until it started knocking and seized. I mowed the entire front yard before the mower gave up.

That was 26 years ago and I am still mad at myself about it.

I used to be a loner
Bolder than the rest
Thought about the Navy, but I couldn't pass the test

Look closely at the Forks location. They started off on the front end loader.

Unknowingly, the fork's global connector wasn't fully latched. I had been running them that way for a couple of weeks. That day I raised FEL up fully and then threw the forks backwards

Bounced off heavy tubing framed Canopy, wound up on hood.


Managed to do this while my wife was standing nearby watching me of course.
I had the song " dumb ways to die" playing in my head afterwards.

I've run tractors all my life and had this one since 2018.

Brother and I fishing at Shamrock Cove in Corpus and put in at Wilson's cut. Coming in hot to the boat launch, I hopped off the bow to stop us from bumping into another boat thinking it was just a few feet deep. I was wearing full waders and as I jumped over the front railing, I found myself sinking down down about 7 feet bumping my ass on the bottom. Apparently, all the sand was blown out by boat props loading on and off of trailers. I came up with full waders to a crowd of laughing fishermen, it was a wet ride back to the house!

Early 90's driving to Galveston, buddy driving decides he needs to go. Told me to grab the wheel. I thought he was going to use a bottle. NOPE. Climbs out the window and on crawls on top of the car and and maneuvers into the passenger window as I slide over and drive 60-70mph. Well, all of a sudden I had to go and the cycle started over. Might have been a few beverages involved. Easily the dumbest thing I've done. I am lucky I didn't get to shake Mr. Darwin's hand that day.

Not the dumbest, but I am sure most of us have been there, at least if you have owned a boat for any length of time....

Had an Aggie roommate (from 30 years ago) with me on a fishing trip at the coast for the first time, since I had gotten a newer boat.

Told him casually to check the plugs, forgetting he is from EAST Texas. We drop her into the water, he parks the turck/trailer, and I am looking around, thinking hmmmmm, we seem to be riding slow and harder to get on plane in a boat that usually stands up quick.

I ask, "Didn't you check the plugs?" He says, "plugSSS?" (like a snake in that last part) LOL "I only put in one. This boat has more than 1?"

I reply, "Yes, 4 to be exact. Thus the Ssssss at the end". And just shake my head.....

LOL...we rode hard to the nearest shallow cut where I beached it, he jumped out and put the other 3 in. I also jumped out to verify his work, which I should have done at the ramp. Oh well, no one really hurt.

34-ish years ago...
Use to go out to Bend all the time fishing at Lamar's place. Just across the bridge from there, turn right, and you get to "Flat Rock". There was a big drop down to the river if you take the "other" route. Guys use to try to climb that in their trucks. Me in my 1/2 ton 2wd short bed square decided I could try going down it from the top. I quickly learned that a sufficient angle with cause the floats in your carb to shut off fuel flow. Was also reminded, about the same time, that power brakes need the engine running to be of any assistance. Stopped just before going for a swim.

Anchored on the downwind side of Starnes Island on lake Travis and was swimming around on the other side with my brother. Came back and my boat was 200 yards away drifting in the wind. I told my brother to spot me and tried to swim it down. Half a mile later I caught up to it, and I am a pretty good swimmer. I wasn't worried I couldn't keep swimming so much as I it was also late in the afternoon and I was getting harder to see in the water.

Just really stupid but I lived.

Another was working on an electric clothes dryer and grounding the heating coil with my arm after idiotically forgetting to unplug it. Felt that one.

Drove my 1999 Plymouth Breeze off-road to try and access Yegua creek outside Somerville to collect fish for a class. Kept going farther in the soft ground than intelligence suggested. Got stuck. Hitched a ride into town. Some locals unsuccessfully tried pulling me out.

While trying to to get pulled out, I was trying to to assist with that power from a fwd 4banger. After failing, I get out of the car and accidentally lock my car with the keys in and running.

It's Sunday evening, takes a while to get a tow truck and someone to unlock the car. Thankfully those guys felt pity on me and charged me under $100.

I'm dog tired, finally make it back to TAMUG around midnight. Was seeing people walking in the road while getting off the highway (thankfully no actual people were there).

Last car I ever drove, and will never drive another car ever. Also, will try to avoid driving in anything wet and soft mud.

I was trimming some live oak branches that hung over the roof because there was a hurricane headed into the gulf. Went up the ladder to trim the last one, just stepped onto the roof and the ladder kicked out from under me. My head was probably 16 feet off the ground. Was bleeding from a few places, a good chunk of one of my little toes had vanished. But no broken bones. Caught my breath and went back up and finished the job. I was 68 years old at the time.

When I was 70, I couldn't get the pilot to light on one of the gas water heaters. So late one night I went up into the attic and got on my tummy and looked to see if the igniter was creating a spark. It wasn't. I turn off the gas supply valve and head back down. Still not sure how I got to the opening for the pull down stairs as soon as I did, but my right leg fell into the opening, my left leg remained in the attic, and my face slammed into the back of a children's rocking chair. Again I was bleeding, face and mouth, figured I had knocked out a half dozen teeth, but had not. I was moaning pretty loudly, my wife asked what was wrong, I told her to get my pistol and put me out of my misery.

Then when I was 72 I was going over to my son's house to do something, they were out of town. I looked over in the passenger seat to be sure I had his house key. Didn't see it so I figured I had tossed it into the seat with enough force that it fell between the seat and door. I had just started my pickup while this was going on and it was idling up pretty fast. I shove it into park (evidently, not fully into park), and start to hop out to walk around to the passenger side to see. The truck starts going backward, fairly quickly due to the idle speed of the engine still being revved up. The open door on the driver's side knocks my ass backward and onto the driveway, my back hitting a concrete bird bath that had not been moved to where it should be (broke it) and my big ass is flat on my back. The steering wheel was turned slightly to the right which meant the left front tire was headed right at me. All I could think of is the truck was going to hit the front porch, the corner of it (it would not have), and travel the nearly 600 feet to the farm to market road out front and hit another vehicle or get hit by one. Funny how fast things go through your mind. I knew I could get up off the driveway quicker if I rolled over onto my hands and knees so I did. The tire ran over my heel and part of my ankle as I did, and after the door passed over me, I jumped my big ass up, sprinted to the door and around it (Curtis Dickey would have stood no chance) grabbed the steering wheel and pulled myself up into the seat and shut it down.

So, 68, 70, and 72. Just turned 73. Going to skip 74 and go right into 75.