Screw it. I'm going tonight.
TRANSFORMERS: THE LAST KNIGHT sounds batsh*t insane...
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Last: 6 yr ago by jr15aggie
Same. I'll be seeing this tonight. Why am I like this?TCTTS said:
Screw it. I'm going tonight.
We can start a support group together.
I've seen a few reviews but not a flood of them just yet. Wonder why that is.
Either way, it sounds like ****.
Either way, it sounds like ****.
GiveEmHellBill said:Reviews?jr15aggie said:
I see that reviews aren't live yet... LOL, well that can't be good.
Still going to go see it!!!!
Seriously?
It's a Transformers movie......who gives a sh*t about critic reviews?
You're either in, or you're not.
Just to see how much they're going to **** on this movie is my guess. I expect they're going to rip it to shreds, just like I expect TCTTS to do tonight/tomorrow.
I honestly probably won't even have the energy. When I make an effort to post a negative review it's usually to make an undervalued point or get a conversation going. Here, we all know these are going to suck each and every time, and I doubt I'll have anything to add to the conversation in that regard.
Regardless of what happens the story revolving around the Transformers being on this planet since the middle ages is less bonkers than Patrick Dempsey's family getting rich off of being accountants for the Decepticons in the third one. Or Mark Wahlberg being from Texas.
Regal giving away free popcorn and t-shirt if I go see the movie tonight.
Ha! You could throw in a free ticket and I won't go see this garbage.
Ha! You could throw in a free ticket and I won't go see this garbage.
Will be checking this to see TC's comments though. Can't wait.
It's gonna be Awesomely Terribad!
Saw the last trailer for this movie this past weekend in the theater. Just hearing Anthony Hopkins narrate through the trailer makes even this pile of hot garbage sound awesome.
Same here pard!
It's like a trainwreck. You know it's gonna be bad, you don't want to look, but we do anyway.HeadGames said:
Same here pard!
I'm not ashamed.
In 15 years when we're getting ready for Starscream 2: AllSpark Bugaloo and the crossover Bumblebee Meets The Minions!... I'm holding each and everyone of you that see this movie personally responsible
Just got home from it, I enjoyed the hell out of it and I think a lot of Transformer fans (heck maybe even most) will too.
Was smiling throughout the majority of the movie.
Was smiling throughout the majority of the movie.
Yep agree it was very enjoyable. They packed a lot into the movie but to me it was all interesting tying things back to our history. Yes it has the normal cheesiness and goofball humor at times but had A LOT of action and transformer screen time. The little teaser at the end had me wanting to see the next one. Fire away but I thought it was the best one yet.
It was super good guys, for a robot movie. I felt as though it was very long, but I didn't want it to end because it was interesting and fun. It's probably the 2nd best of the series.
100% agree with stump
100% agree with stump
Honestly, I'm kind of shocked by these pleasant reactions. Not because it's a terrible movie, but because - HO. LEESH. IT. - that was, hands down, the WEIRDEST, longest, most randomly nutzo blockbuster I have ever seen in my life. How are you people acting this normal after what we just saw?
Seriously, it's not a terrible movie. Or maybe it is. Either way, I cannot emphasize enough how incredibly strange, random, and especially looong this movie is, with so many plot lines going on that it feels like five different movies in one. Don't get me wrong - it's definitely BAD - but I have never been in such awe and yet so bored and confused at the exact same time.
I just... what the *****did I just watch??? It felt like something I dreamed. I can't get over how simultaneously confusing and nonsensical that was, but also maybe the most coherent of the bunch? It made sense! Kind of!? But I'm also pissed that it did... and yet didn't. I truly can't describe it.
This movie seriously broke my brain like never before.
Anthony Hopkins, for one, is far more game than I ever thought he'd be, to the point where I'm certain he was on drugs during half his scenes. It's the most unexpected performance and one that keeps getting increasingly unhinged. It's just shocking that not only he, but EVERYONE involved - from the cast to the crew to the effects team - put THAT MUCH effort into making something so stupid and disorienting. It's seriously one of the biggest and most audacious blockbusters I've ever seen, but I just can't comprehend devoting 16 hours a day to it for months on end, knowing how utterly insane the foundation was they had to work from. It's just baffling.
I mean, there's what had to be a 20 MINUTE scene toward the beginning of just Whalberg yelling at Autobots in a junk yard, Wahlberg and Jerrod Carmichael yelling at each other in the same junkyard, and then Autobots yelling and wrestling among themselves in the junkyard, where the plot advances in no way whatsoever. It's SO WEIRD. And you're just wondering how on Earth did human beings A) conceive this, and B) think it was ok to just let this scene NEVER END.
There's even a point at which Wahlberg's character gives a motivational speech to a group of soldiers and I sh*t you not he somehow quotes the lyrics from like three different hip hop songs from the '90s unironically. As in, I don't think any writer or filmmaker on set knew they were quoting famous '90s hip hop lyrics and I'm pretty sure one of the lines was from one of Wahlberg's own songs, but there's ZERO wink-factor. This movie is full of sh*t like that. Just a bunch of crazy weird lines and exchanges that make no sense whatsoever. Some you've heard a thousand times before, but shoehorned where they don't belong, and others - so many others - where it feels like you're truly going mad because it's just random words and sentences being spoken that don't form cohesive conversations in any way.
It really does feel like this movie was written by the characters in Idiocracy - like, their idea of what a 21st century Transformers movie was - and then somehow filmed on the biggest budget ever given to any movie in history. It's like they heard that the Transformers movies of the '00s featured incredibly stereotypical, racist robots, and decided to double down on that conceit in particular. I just can't wrap my mind around it.
Overall, I'm not mad and I'm not disappointed. In fact, I kind of even had fun. Yet, at the same time, I feel like the world is absolutely going to end any minute, as long as this is a world in which this kind of movie can exist. I was so embarrassed to even be in theater watching it, and even more embarrassed for humanity after. That said... I wouldn't begrudge anyone for spending money on it, much less actually liking it.
Seriously, it's not a terrible movie. Or maybe it is. Either way, I cannot emphasize enough how incredibly strange, random, and especially looong this movie is, with so many plot lines going on that it feels like five different movies in one. Don't get me wrong - it's definitely BAD - but I have never been in such awe and yet so bored and confused at the exact same time.
I just... what the *****did I just watch??? It felt like something I dreamed. I can't get over how simultaneously confusing and nonsensical that was, but also maybe the most coherent of the bunch? It made sense! Kind of!? But I'm also pissed that it did... and yet didn't. I truly can't describe it.
This movie seriously broke my brain like never before.
Anthony Hopkins, for one, is far more game than I ever thought he'd be, to the point where I'm certain he was on drugs during half his scenes. It's the most unexpected performance and one that keeps getting increasingly unhinged. It's just shocking that not only he, but EVERYONE involved - from the cast to the crew to the effects team - put THAT MUCH effort into making something so stupid and disorienting. It's seriously one of the biggest and most audacious blockbusters I've ever seen, but I just can't comprehend devoting 16 hours a day to it for months on end, knowing how utterly insane the foundation was they had to work from. It's just baffling.
I mean, there's what had to be a 20 MINUTE scene toward the beginning of just Whalberg yelling at Autobots in a junk yard, Wahlberg and Jerrod Carmichael yelling at each other in the same junkyard, and then Autobots yelling and wrestling among themselves in the junkyard, where the plot advances in no way whatsoever. It's SO WEIRD. And you're just wondering how on Earth did human beings A) conceive this, and B) think it was ok to just let this scene NEVER END.
There's even a point at which Wahlberg's character gives a motivational speech to a group of soldiers and I sh*t you not he somehow quotes the lyrics from like three different hip hop songs from the '90s unironically. As in, I don't think any writer or filmmaker on set knew they were quoting famous '90s hip hop lyrics and I'm pretty sure one of the lines was from one of Wahlberg's own songs, but there's ZERO wink-factor. This movie is full of sh*t like that. Just a bunch of crazy weird lines and exchanges that make no sense whatsoever. Some you've heard a thousand times before, but shoehorned where they don't belong, and others - so many others - where it feels like you're truly going mad because it's just random words and sentences being spoken that don't form cohesive conversations in any way.
It really does feel like this movie was written by the characters in Idiocracy - like, their idea of what a 21st century Transformers movie was - and then somehow filmed on the biggest budget ever given to any movie in history. It's like they heard that the Transformers movies of the '00s featured incredibly stereotypical, racist robots, and decided to double down on that conceit in particular. I just can't wrap my mind around it.
Overall, I'm not mad and I'm not disappointed. In fact, I kind of even had fun. Yet, at the same time, I feel like the world is absolutely going to end any minute, as long as this is a world in which this kind of movie can exist. I was so embarrassed to even be in theater watching it, and even more embarrassed for humanity after. That said... I wouldn't begrudge anyone for spending money on it, much less actually liking it.
I fully expect to pay for my sins.Sex Panther said:
In 15 years when we're getting ready for Starscream 2: AllSpark Bugaloo and the crossover Bumblebee Meets The Minions!... I'm holding each and everyone of you that see this movie personally responsible
Also, just FYI, I saw this opening night in the most popular theater in LA and the theater wasn't even remotely halfway full. Granted, I had no idea until yesterday that they had changed the release date to Wednesday from Friday, and it is a Tuesday night, but still. I definitely don't see this doing the massive numbers of the past domestically.
This is an incredible review. That is all.
I've not seen a single Transformers film in a theater - think I've only watched one of them on TV - but the TCTTS review makes me want to watch this one. I'm a fan of baffling, crazy hollywood movies.
Awesome review by TC.
Hope this fails miserably.
Hope this fails miserably.
All I took from this thread is that Bumblebee is getting his own movie.
Can this be true?
Can this be true?
16% on RT
I was a MASSIVE fan of Transformers when I was a child. Rented the movie every week. Had the toys. Would transform myself around the house and pretend to be a jet or car.
It's crazy how disconnected I feel to this entire franchise. Kind of like how the World War Z writer could enjoy the movie because it only shared a name and that's it. This franchise only seems to share the name and Optimus' voice only.
What it does seem to have is a consistently unnecessary 2 1/2 hour runtime, way too many human characters, not enough transformering, dumb dialogue and characterizations... etc. etc.
The cartoon was 95% robot cast, 5% human, with no racial stereotypes, genitals jokes, or action so messy you couldn't tell what you'd just watched.
I like the Marvel movies because they're a tight 2 hours, with a story that makes sense and enough quality action to keep you entertained. They adopt the source material in clever and faithful ways. This franchise seems to be the exact opposite.
It's crazy how disconnected I feel to this entire franchise. Kind of like how the World War Z writer could enjoy the movie because it only shared a name and that's it. This franchise only seems to share the name and Optimus' voice only.
What it does seem to have is a consistently unnecessary 2 1/2 hour runtime, way too many human characters, not enough transformering, dumb dialogue and characterizations... etc. etc.
The cartoon was 95% robot cast, 5% human, with no racial stereotypes, genitals jokes, or action so messy you couldn't tell what you'd just watched.
I like the Marvel movies because they're a tight 2 hours, with a story that makes sense and enough quality action to keep you entertained. They adopt the source material in clever and faithful ways. This franchise seems to be the exact opposite.
zgood10 said:
16% on RT
Disappointingly high, I'm losing interest now.
I bet it does huge numbers.
Haven't watched the cartoon lately have you? I've rewatched it recently with my kids, all of these things are just not accurate.rhutton125 said:
I was a MASSIVE fan of Transformers when I was a child. Rented the movie every week. Had the toys. Would transform myself around the house and pretend to be a jet or car.
It's crazy how disconnected I feel to this entire franchise. Kind of like how the World War Z writer could enjoy the movie because it only shared a name and that's it. This franchise only seems to share the name and Optimus' voice only.
What it does seem to have is a consistently unnecessary 2 1/2 hour runtime, way too many human characters, not enough transformering, dumb dialogue and characterizations... etc. etc.
The cartoon was 95% robot cast, 5% human, with no racial stereotypes, genitals jokes, or action so messy you couldn't tell what you'd just watched.
I like the Marvel movies because they're a tight 2 hours, with a story that makes sense and enough quality action to keep you entertained. They adopt the source material in clever and faithful ways. This franchise seems to be the exact opposite.
Maybe I should specify, season 1. I bailed pretty hard on season 2.
Season 1 had Spike, his dad, and the wheelchair kid and I think that's it. That's how it should be.
Season 1 had Spike, his dad, and the wheelchair kid and I think that's it. That's how it should be.
I tried rewatching the original cartoon recently as it was my favorite as a kid. It's downright unwatchable, it's so bad.
But if they said Batman makes an appearance, you'd be saying how great of a movie this is.Brian Earl Spilner said:
Regal giving away free popcorn and t-shirt if I go see the movie tonight.
Ha! You could throw in a free ticket and I won't go see this garbage.
Nm
Besides TCTTS' review, these reviews made me chuckle:
"Freed of concerns like plausibility or story, you can simply gape in wonder at the ruthlessly thunderous images in front of you. Maybe that's the feeling of brain cells dying a painful, anguished death" Jake Coyle, Associated Press
"Transformers: The Last Knight isn't so much a film as it is a catalogue of everything wrong with western civilization." William Bibbiani, CraveOnline
"Freed of concerns like plausibility or story, you can simply gape in wonder at the ruthlessly thunderous images in front of you. Maybe that's the feeling of brain cells dying a painful, anguished death" Jake Coyle, Associated Press
"Transformers: The Last Knight isn't so much a film as it is a catalogue of everything wrong with western civilization." William Bibbiani, CraveOnline
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