Maybe I was, maybe I wasn't.
Do Women Respect Men who Give Up Career Growth to Be Mr Mom?
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108 Replies |
Last: 6 yr ago by 62strat
Y'all are slacking
Well, Pampers melt in a Maytag dryer
Crayons go up one drawer higher
Rewind Barney for the fifteenth time
Breakfast at six, naps at nine
There's bubblegum in the baby's hair
Sweet potatoes in my lazy chair
Been crazy all day long
And it's only Monday, Mr. mom
Well, Pampers melt in a Maytag dryer
Crayons go up one drawer higher
Rewind Barney for the fifteenth time
Breakfast at six, naps at nine
There's bubblegum in the baby's hair
Sweet potatoes in my lazy chair
Been crazy all day long
And it's only Monday, Mr. mom
Do you have kids and if so how old are they? As kids get older they get really busy with activities after school so maybe the purpose of his job is to bring in some pay or benefits but that they need flexibility for the kids activities. If two parents are putting in long hours to climb that career ladder who is taking care of the kids? Growing up my parents both turned down some growth in their professional careers because family time and kids lessons were a priority. At the end of the day you will hear people say that they wished they had more family time. Nobody says I wish I had worked longer hours.
So maybe her career growth abd his flexible job are a great fit for their family.
So maybe her career growth abd his flexible job are a great fit for their family.
ac04 said:
love that the OP pretends to be so self-confident and then posts this kind of drivel. hilarious.
That's bc it's Sea Bass.
Depends. Is the woman Amy Grant?
BombayAg said:
My wife's cousin (woman) is married to this guy and they have 2 kids who are in single digits by age. The cousin is very ambitious, career minded and driven. She is doing reasonably well in her career and in many ways defined herself by her career. For Indian women, working is a relatively new thing so it carries a lot of prestige. She works long hours, she leaves early and comes back late, around 7pm.
Her husband is some years older and is very laid back in his career ambitions. I know him for many years and I think he is an intelligent person who knows what is going on in the world and can think and analyze. However, career-wise he is where he was 10 years ago and works for a Government agency where the work is mundane and boring but they have things like pensions and other stuff. Lots of red tape and work happens slow.
Outside of work he does not do anything to learn new skills in his job to move up or to find another job that pays him more. He takes the kids to classes, does the grocery and then watches TV and movies. He works for a Govt agency, so I was able to google and find his salary as it is public. He used to make slightly more than me in 2010 but in 2017 but I make about 85% more than him and now have a higher title.
I believe in learning new skills and making the changes to move up the ladder either in the same company or different. He does not seem to. I met him over lunch a month ago and asked him how his job was and he said "no job satisfaction but it allows for flexible hours". I was taken aback as I think that a man needs to man up and work to advance himself rather than settle for "flex hours".
Some years ago, my wife was praising him about how he helps out his wife in the house, takes care of the kids, does the laundry and helps out and how I don't do enough of that (bad bad husband). My argument was that I am doing an advanced degree from a top school (post A&M), and am learning other things to advance and bring in more income for us. I do help out and do things outside the house like lawn, bills, auto but not as much Mr Mom stuff as him. Last month I told her about what he said and she dismissively said she didn't respect him. Wow.
My question is do women here on this board and around you respect men who give up their career goals so that they can be Mr Mom? Do their own wives appreciate it or lose respect for them?
You sound like an insecure peasant.
Adulterous trash, amiright?bh93 said:
Depends. Is the woman Amy Grant?
GeorgePlimpton said:
How pathetic are you? You're that insecure that you would start a thread insulting this guy with the hope that the replies would all be about how much better you are than him? Clearly your wife doesn't respect you and would rather be with the other guy. Sucks to suck
You dumbo. He is anonymous here and I have not named him. Just like you are not George Plimpton. If you are, I am amazed at your stupidity.
That is why I want to hear from the women here. Maybe they can help.
Asking a dumb*** man like you is useless.
GeorgePlimpton said:
These threads are the best. Guy thinks everyone will stroke his ego and ends up urinating all over himself in front of everyone
Wow, I come here with a genuine issue that is happening and all I see is pimply faced losers pissing all over.
Where is the Adult forum on this board?
Shutup
713nervy said:
Ambition is a personality trait just like being direct, having a good attitude, being resourceful, etc. But, it's unlike the rest in that it's innate and likely cannot be learned. Nothing wrong with that - some people want to actively progress in their careers and some people do not. Just pick something that makes you happy and be the best [fill in the blank] that you can be. That's what I respect, Mr. Mom or otherwise.
Ok, so I am not Mr Mom. But I help out and do my fair share. It is hard with my job as I am the primary source of income. I sometimes think back and wonder if I had become Mr Mom by crumbling to the pressure, I would have hated myself and been probably laughed at later for being Mr Mom.
No easy way out.
aggie0420 said:
Sounds like your wife feels you should probably be a little more helpful around the house and take time to consider her more. Your plate seems pretty full. Seem smart and together. I understand, I am busy too, but take time to consider your wife and what you can do to be helpful. Be in the present. Listen to her.
This will help.
If you ever find that you are pondering what your wife thinks of you as husband... Step up, you are probably slacking.
The main issue is that she does not see what I do around the house. But that is a different issue.
I am not sure if women like Mr Mom, or just like the sound of it, but secretly despise it if their own husband is Mr Mom.
MouthBQ98 said:
Knew a couple guys whose wives got into a really lucrative career, and they both basically quit once they were financially set as a family and became Mr. Mom. Worked out fine for them so far as I can tell.
It might look okay from outside because everyone puts up a show to the world, but I wonder what is going on inside the marriage. Many couples in our circle seemed happy and the woman would post on FB about lavish vacations and relaxing lifestyle but they ended up divorcing.
Haysoos, now we gotta see this sh*tty thread stay bumped at the top while you go back and reply to 53 replies you're just getting back around to after a 12 hour shift at the call center?
ac04 said:
love that the OP pretends to be so self-confident and then posts this kind of drivel. hilarious.
I am self confident, but I am human too. I have the same issues everyone else does.
ag97tx said:
Do you have kids and if so how old are they? As kids get older they get really busy with activities after school so maybe the purpose of his job is to bring in some pay or benefits but that they need flexibility for the kids activities. If two parents are putting in long hours to climb that career ladder who is taking care of the kids? Growing up my parents both turned down some growth in their professional careers because family time and kids lessons were a priority. At the end of the day you will hear people say that they wished they had more family time. Nobody says I wish I had worked longer hours.
So maybe her career growth abd his flexible job are a great fit for their family.
I have kids, entering teenage. His kids are younger though. Post grad school, I could have taken up a traveling consulting job but I did not because I wanted to be around the family and not running after career growth. I do think I had to pay a price though I have made up for it somewhat.
But assuming he is ambitious and is sacrificing that to be Mr Mom so that his wife can work I wonder how things work there. Maybe it is lose lose for him long term.
jetch17 said:
Haysoos, now we gotta see this sh*tty thread stay bumped at the top while you go back and reply to 53 replies you're just getting back around to after a 12 hour shift at the call center?
If you don't like then leave.It's a free country.
Go back to burger flipping, you illiterate degenerate.
BombayAg said:713nervy said:
Ambition is a personality trait just like being direct, having a good attitude, being resourceful, etc. But, it's unlike the rest in that it's innate and likely cannot be learned. Nothing wrong with that - some people want to actively progress in their careers and some people do not. Just pick something that makes you happy and be the best [fill in the blank] that you can be. That's what I respect, Mr. Mom or otherwise.
Ok, so I am not Mr Mom. But I help out and do my fair share. It is hard with my job as I am the primary source of income. I sometimes think back and wonder if I had become Mr Mom by crumbling to the pressure, I would have hated myself and been probably laughed at later for being Mr Mom.
No easy way out.
To clarify, what is hard because of your job? Helping out around the house?
It's all about priorities.
BombayAg said:jetch17 said:
Haysoos, now we gotta see this sh*tty thread stay bumped at the top while you go back and reply to 53 replies you're just getting back around to after a 12 hour shift at the call center?
If you don't like then leave.It's a free country.
Go back to burger flipping, you illiterate degenerate.
It took me over two hours to sound out the words and punch out at burger bonanza, but 1000 goatses to you
713nervy said:BombayAg said:713nervy said:
Ambition is a personality trait just like being direct, having a good attitude, being resourceful, etc. But, it's unlike the rest in that it's innate and likely cannot be learned. Nothing wrong with that - some people want to actively progress in their careers and some people do not. Just pick something that makes you happy and be the best [fill in the blank] that you can be. That's what I respect, Mr. Mom or otherwise.
Ok, so I am not Mr Mom. But I help out and do my fair share. It is hard with my job as I am the primary source of income. I sometimes think back and wonder if I had become Mr Mom by crumbling to the pressure, I would have hated myself and been probably laughed at later for being Mr Mom.
No easy way out.
To clarify, what is hard because of your job? Helping out around the house?
It's all about priorities.
It's hard to do more. I don't cook but I clean, do laundry, and do all of the work outside the house (lawn etc), auto maintenance.
jetch17 said:BombayAg said:jetch17 said:
Haysoos, now we gotta see this sh*tty thread stay bumped at the top while you go back and reply to 53 replies you're just getting back around to after a 12 hour shift at the call center?
If you don't like then leave.It's a free country.
Go back to burger flipping, you illiterate degenerate.
It took me over two hours to sound out the words and punch out at burger bonanza, but 1000 goatses to you
You need to send your mom those goats. Your daddy isn't keeping her busy.
You're a feisty one. My brown curry friend.
Takes a lot of stress out of your entire family's life to have one parent available to shuttle kids around and deal with all of the in's and out's they need. I know stay home dad's and dad's who throttled back their career to take the lead on these needs, and they are all in what continue to appear to be happy marriages and have been for a long time.
Insecure OP and his family are feeling the stress that these other families had courage to address. Women respect a guy that help them fulfill their needs and make them happy. Sometimes that's being the breadwinner. Sometimes that's being the one to focus on the family's other needs.
Insecure OP and his family are feeling the stress that these other families had courage to address. Women respect a guy that help them fulfill their needs and make them happy. Sometimes that's being the breadwinner. Sometimes that's being the one to focus on the family's other needs.
GeorgePlimpton said:
These threads are the best. Guy thinks everyone will stroke his ego and ends up urinating all over himself in front of everyone
You know he's just a massive troll, right? This is what he thrives on. And the GB keeps feeding him, non-stop.
You know you're an adult when you no longer care what other people think or respect.
I hope you get there someday.
I hope you get there someday.
The root of this thread is that many cultures value the world's opinion more than their own as an individual. That's why most of them have average homes but are sure to drive mercedes, lexi, etc. They let people around them tell them what is honorable and live their lives under immense pressure to please any number of people but themselves.
(I learned most of this from that movie where the indian girl wanted to be a soccer player)
(I learned most of this from that movie where the indian girl wanted to be a soccer player)
My wife agrees with OP
"They would appreciate it but not find it attractive."
FML i gotta keep working
"They would appreciate it but not find it attractive."
FML i gotta keep working
Depends on how much she makes and what kind of country club she can afford to get us into...
Is your higher salary and title what allowed you to afford that sweet entry level 3-series? That's the kind of car normally only wealthy people can afford to buy for their teenage daughters.
Hahahahahaha 4 cylinder Beemers.GAC06 said:
Is your higher salary and title what allowed you to afford that sweet entry level 3-series? That's the kind of car normally only wealthy people can afford to buy for their teenage daughters.
Why do you care how your cousin and her husband choose to live their life and handle their career dynamics? Are they hurting you somehow? Does he make you feel emasculated or something?
Dumb thread.
Dumb thread.
CNN is an enemy of the state and should be treated as such.
OP's own wife admiring the guy seems to have emasculated the OP.
This reminds me of a person I was talking to the other day that bought an 80K suburban to haul their kids around in because they didn't like the image of driving a minivan for half the price. I laughed and said that keeping up a facade costs a lot of money.
Moral of the story: who gives an F. That other dude is probably a lot happier than you and he clearly isn't worried what you think of him. Don't derive your self worth out of your career or educational choices. You're still going to be dumb, even after you finish your fancy degree.
Moral of the story: who gives an F. That other dude is probably a lot happier than you and he clearly isn't worried what you think of him. Don't derive your self worth out of your career or educational choices. You're still going to be dumb, even after you finish your fancy degree.
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