"So this is what it feels like <<SNIFF>> when doves cry!"

#15 is the best Simpsons quote ever. Phil Hartman was greatness

I think this is my favorite Hutz moment:

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Judge: The foreman will pass the verdict to the bailiff.

[Hutz hands him something]

Judge: This verdict is written on a cocktail napkin. And it still says guilty. And guilty is spelled wrong.

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[This message has been edited by MW03 (edited 4/25/2011 3:03p).]

Or this one

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Mr. Simpson, don't you worry. I watched Matlock in a bar last night. The sound wasn't on, but I think I got the gist of it.

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I've always loved how much they rip on Fox

Leprechaun to Ralph:
Now you know what you have to do laddie...burn the house down!... burn them all!

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5dJznTAwLSY

"They were having S-E-X in front of the C-H-I-L-D-R-E-N..."

"Sex Cauldron?! I thought they shut that place down?!"

"Principal Skinner and Ms. Krabappel were in the closet making babies and I saw one of the babies and the baby looked at me!"

"I'm not usually a praying man, but if you're up there, please, save me Superman!"

I've seen maybe 5 new episodes in the last 2-3 years. A few were ok, but yeah the humor just isn't the same, and Homer's character hasn't been the same since the early 2000s. The first 10 seasons, and especially the Treehouse of Horrors episodes, are pretty much brilliant.

Shopkeeper: Take this object, but beware it carries a terrible curse!
Homer: Ooh, that's bad.
Shopkeeper: But it comes with a free frogurt!
Homer: That's good.
Shopkeeper: The frogurt is also cursed.
Homer: That's bad.
Shopkeeper: But you get your choice of toppings.
Homer: That's good!
Shopkeeper: The toppings contain potassium benzoate.
Shopkeeper: ...That's bad.
Homer: Can I go now?

My favorite episode is Bart Sells His Soul:

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Bart: Hymns, here! I got hymns, here. Get 'em while they're holy.
Fresh from God's brain to your mouth. Heh heh heh.

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Close second is Marge v. the Monorail.

Favorite Lionel Hutz Quotes:

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Opposing Counsel: What is your opinion of him?
Marge: Hmmm... I'm sorry. My mother always said if you can't say anything nice don't say anything at all.
Homer: Will that hold up in court?
Hutz: No, I've tried it before.

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With all due respect, Mrs. Simpson, you're not a doctor, the boy's not a doctor, the only person who even comes CLOSE is this man [Nick Riviera].

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Someone made a point re: the Lisa Episodes not being as good. I liked the episode where she gets married and the one where she needs braces.

My alltime favorite quote from the series, and I'm not sure why this cracks me up but it does:

quote:

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Sideshow Bob: Ah, Mr. Simpson, you're forgetting the first two noble truths of the Buddha.
Homer: I am not!

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Freddy: Hey! What the hell is this?
Waiter: [French accent] It's a bowl of chowder, sir. ["shaudere"]
Freddy: Wait a minute, come here. What did you call it? Say it loud enough so everyone can hear. Cone on, say it...
Waiter: Ahem. Chowder. ["shaudere"]
Freddy: [raucous laughter] Shau-dere? Shau-dere? It's "chowder". ["chowdah"] Say it right!
Waiter: [pause] Chowder. ["shaudear"]
Freddy: [laugher] Come back here! I'm not through demeaning you.

http://www.snpp.com/episodes/1F19.html

[This message has been edited by MidnightYell2003 (edited 4/25/2011 10:17p).]

I don't get the buddha joke

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I don't get the buddha joke

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You're trying to hard. Homer didn't know what he was talking about.

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quote:
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I don't get the buddha joke

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You're trying to hard. Homer didn't know what he was talking about.

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Yeah, probably the best part, too, is the indignation with which he says it despite that.

Marge, don't discourage the boy.! Weaseling out of things is important to learn. It's what separates us from the animals... except the weasel.

Homer we have someone who can help.
Batman?
No, a scientist.
Batman's a scientist!

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Movementarians: Na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na Leader!
All (except Homer): Na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na Leader!
Leader! Leader...
Homer: Batman! ... I mean Leader!

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Can't believe this didn't make the Top 100 list:

"We need more 'Bort' license plates in the gift shop. Repeat: we are out of 'Bort' license plates."

were you referring to me? My name is also Bort.

one of my all time favs is "the stonecutters" episode, specifically this quote:

"Remove the stone of shame!"

[removes the boulder attached to homers neck]

"Attach the stone of triumph!"

[attaches an even bigger boulder to homers neck]

And of course, "We do! We do!"

Homer: That's it, you people have stood in my way long enough...I'm going to clown college!

^
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Bart: I don't think any of us expected him to say that.

Moe: Oh, boy! The deep fryer's here. Heh heh, I got it used from the navy. You can flash-fry a buffalo in forty seconds with this thing.
Homer: Forty seconds? But I want it now!


Mr. Burns (as the alien): I bring you loooooove!
Lenny: It's bringing love! Don't let it get away!
Carl: Break its legs!

Homer: He called me, "greenhorn." I called him, "Tony Randall." It was a thing we had

Yep, notice what years most of these quotes are from.

What of my all-time favorite segments: Meat and You. Partners in Freedom.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_IMFcJBAQ6I

"I have a CRAZY friend who says it's wrong to eat meat. Is he CRAZY?"
-No, just ignorant. See, what your crazy friend fails to realize...

"Ask this scientician"
-Uh

"SILENT ALARM ACTIVATED!!!"

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Mrs. Krabappel: "Embiggens"? I never heard that word before I came to Springfield.

Miss Hoover: I don't know why. It's a perfectly cromulent word.

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Burns: "I wonder if this Homer Nixon is of any relation"

Smithers "Unlikely Sir...they spell and pronounce their names differently"

First you get the sugar.
Then you get the power.
Then you get the women.

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The goggles...they do nothing!

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One of the great misquoted quotes. It's "My eyes... the goggles do nothing!"

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Ralph: What's a battle?

Principal Skinner: Hahahaha, lets go.

Superintendent Chalmers: Did that boy say what's a battle?

Principal Skinner: No he said What's that rattle, it's about the heating duct.

Superintendent Chalmers: Hmm, it sounded like battle.

Principal Skinner: I've had a cold, so--

Superintendent Chalmers: Oh so you hear r's as b's?

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Ralph: Prinskiper Skipple! Prindaple Skinster! I found something!!!

(Crowd comes)

Ralph: Its a spearhead!!

Ms. Hoover: That's your trowel blade Ralph, it fell of the handle.

Ralph: And I found it!!

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Homer: "Go away, stupid bees! Ow! OW!!! They're defending themselves somehow!"

Chalmers: Aurora Borealis?? At this time of year, at this time of day, in this part of the country, localized entirely within your kitchen?
Skinner: Yes.
Chalmers: May I see it?
Skinner: No.

I believe this show went downhill when Family Guy came around. That show's quick humor was hard for the Simpson's to keep up with.