My favorite is, "If you put your head in a noose, someone will come along and slap the horse."
Post some good life lessons
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Last: 19 yr ago by Avatar02
Dont smoke crack
You can pick your friends and you can pick your nose, but you can't roll your friends up in a little ball and flick them across the room.
Never pull a bird backwards out of a mailbox.
Don't eat the yellow snow.
Don't eat the yellow snow.
Never try to drink alcohol that is still on fire.
Yes...I learned the hard way.
Yes...I learned the hard way.
Never get into fights with ugly people, they have nothing to lose.
~dont put a screwdriver in an electrical outlet
~dont run over someone hands with a vaccum
~toliets are breakable
~dont climb onto the roof adn pretend its a slide
~dont run over someone hands with a vaccum
~toliets are breakable
~dont climb onto the roof adn pretend its a slide
Never quit a job if you don't have another one already lined up.
Learned that one the hard way.
Learned that one the hard way.
never, EVER do the chicken dance in mexico.
Stay the hell away from texags.
Don't post on Texags. You won't be able to stop.
lol bloomer and I tie!
Always put 20% down on a house and pay cash for cars.
Speaking of Mexico
Always make sure you can cover the tab at a sh***y strip joint in mexico.
bad things man.
Always make sure you can cover the tab at a sh***y strip joint in mexico.
bad things man.
tie? I beat you in OT, sally. take your beating and go home.
Beer before liquor, never sicker.
Liquor before beer, have no fear.
Liquor before beer, have no fear.
When you're with a dirty skank, always wrap it before you tap it.
Never go against a Sicilian when death is on the line
Never play leapfrog with a unicorn.
Don't date based on personality
When hiding a body, always apply a fresh coat of bleach in order to destroy as much physical evidence as possible.
At Outback, "Blokes" is the Men's room
If a woman gives great head but says she's never done it before, just believe her lies. You'll both be happier.
quote:
Old age and treachery will always defeat youth and skill.
Not for Randy Johnson.
Dude can't hit the broad side of a barn anymore.
Keep your pants and your weapon where you can find them in the dark.
Always keep your aircraft in the middle of the air. Do not go near the edges. The edges may be recognised by the presence of wires, buildings, trees, mountains, water, and/or interstellar space.
[This message has been edited by Stoney (edited 5/24/2006 2:04p).]
Always keep your aircraft in the middle of the air. Do not go near the edges. The edges may be recognised by the presence of wires, buildings, trees, mountains, water, and/or interstellar space.
[This message has been edited by Stoney (edited 5/24/2006 2:04p).]
Sell your truck while it's still runnin' -
Save the Jesus off the dash...
Say a prayer when you feel like cussin'...
Save your money, pay with cash.
Forget your pride, buy the roses -
If you're sorry, tell her so...
Don't drink the water in Mexico.
etc. etc. etc
Save the Jesus off the dash...
Say a prayer when you feel like cussin'...
Save your money, pay with cash.
Forget your pride, buy the roses -
If you're sorry, tell her so...
Don't drink the water in Mexico.
etc. etc. etc
I believe its, "Old age and treachery will overcome youth and skill."
Never say, "Those jeans make your butt look big".
Never strike a man in ager, unless you are absolutely sure you can get away with it.
DONT JAR!
Never ever ask when the baby is due.
quote:
Never go against a Sicilian when death is on the line
If I hadn't of watched this the other day, I'd have no clue what you were talking about.
Never be WAAAAAY pregnant during the summer, or football season.....
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