Hell hath no fury like a grandma whose cast iron skillet was put through the dishwasher.

An evil robot version of me from the future threw me from a cliff and I did die briefly. But I smoked death at Clue so I came back.

Duck hunting out of a boat my best friend swung on a bird and shot directly over my head close enough that my hair blew

Twice, people witnessed what I'll call an at work "accident" and assumed no one survived.

The last 2 years numerous times. It's been the scariest time of my life fighting to stay alive. At one point I told my mom goodbye because I was certain we weren't making it to the hospital. I was so cold that they couldn't get a temp on me. To life flights. I have stayed pretty transparent through this whole process with the board. So if you want to see more theres posts. I'm thankful to still be here. Blessed. Very blessed.

Almost drowned... twice.

I walked to my car after a Braves game in downtown Atlanta in the 80s.

Krazykat said:

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Almost drowned... twice.

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Learn to swim

When I was about six, I was playing in a pond at my uncle's place. The water near the bank was waist deep to me, and I was pulling a duck decoy on a string. There were flowers or lilies blooming near the bank and honey bees were working them. I took two or three steps further out so I wouldn't get stung and stepped into much deeper water, over my head. I fought to try to reach the surface but could not and had swallowed water in the process and then the fight ended. Everything I could see was an orange colored light, not a bright light. And the orange was somewhat muted, or pale, not bright at all. I could hear some sort of humming sound though it seemed I didn't hear it through my ears, but heard it, or felt it, through my body. Later, certainly not at that moment, I recalled trying to look beyond the orange light, like trying to peer and see what was beyond the orange light. I was no longer fighting, I had given up, seemed just to be floating and looking.

There were five or six kids, my mom pregnant with my youngest brother, and she did a head count and there was one kid missing. She screamed, my dad saw my hair just under the surface of the water, jumped in (he was wearing a suit so must have been to a funeral) and pulled me out. I vomited water for a good bit.

When I was 22 or so, I was working derricks on a workover rig at Spindletop and had just come down out of the derrick. We had pulled the pipe out of the hole, 63 stands, and were checking a milling shoe. The weather had been nasty all day, and there was something weird about it. Never seen anything like it before or since. The sky turned the weirdest green color and the wind (which had been blowing all day) really got nasty. The rig blew over and two of us on the floor were dumped off it as it started to lean over as the rig leaned over.

When I hit the ground, I jumped up and ran knowing the derrick and pipe was falling on me if I kept going. Once I cleared the second mud tank I made a lunge to the right so as to not be under the derrick. After a couple of strides, I tripped over something, hit the ground, turned my head and saw the derrick full of pipe falling to the ground. At this point it was only 15 feet from impact. I covered my head with my hand and arms, like that was going to do any good, lol. It looked as if it was falling on me when I looked up. The derrick hit maybe 20 feet from me, but the wind was howling so hard I could not hear it hit the ground. I was so full of adrenaline I jumped up and began to run. After a few steps I froze. There was decent sized pools of water everywhere and I knew there were power lines in a couple places near the rig (this field was all pumping unit wells, so needed electricity). I was fearful that the derrick had fallen through and pulled down live electric wires and if I stepped into the wrong puddle it was going to be a bad day. I looked up and counted the lines on the nearest pole and the same number was on each side of the derrick, so none had been pulled down. So I took off running again for maybe 75 yards before I came to my senses.

For 3 or 4 months after that event, I would have daymares, in which I looked up at that falling derrick, again it appeared to be falling on me, and would shudder for a second or two.

One New Year's Eve, a few of us were rabbit hunting with headlights on property we didn't have permission to be on. I think the caretaker who lived on the place was likely drunk, because he had never come after us but this night he did. He shot at us about 8 or 10 times, a couple were near misses, lol.

When I was 3 I got Epiglottitis. Basically when the flap in your throat swells and you can't breathe. This is around 1981 in rural Indiana so not ideal.

Parents called doctor and they misdiagnosed and said put me in a hot bath. Exact opposite of what to do.

Made it worse and I couldn't breathe so they said get me to the hospital no time to wait for an ambulance to get to our house in the boonies.

They told my dad on the phone how to do basically a hillbilly tracheotomy if needed on the way and to make sure to bring a sharp knife.

What saved my life was my dad randomly had an oxygen tank and mask at our house that gave me just enough air to make it to the hospital.

Was in a couple weeks in a tent thing.

Ag with kids said:

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Krazykat said:

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Almost drowned... twice.

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Learn to swim

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One was a wipeout surfing before a hurricane came in. Got hit on the head pretty good with the board.

First time, I was a kid doing stupid **** at the river.

Gotta live life! Not scared!

When I was 18 I was working retail and got robbed at gunpoint and pistol whipped. It was the only moment in my life I was 100% certain I was going to die. I remember very clearly being face-down on the floor and making a point to tightly interlace my fingers behind my head in the hope the bones in my hands would deflect the bullet enough to save my life.

Ryan the Temp said:

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When I was 18 I was working retail and got robbed at gunpoint and pistol whipped. It was the only moment in my life I was 100% certain I was going to die. I remember very clearly being face-down on the floor and making a point to tightly interlace my fingers behind my head in the hope the bones in my hands would deflect the bullet enough to save my life.

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Damn, where was this?

Jack Cheese said:

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Ryan the Temp said:

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When I was 18 I was working retail and got robbed at gunpoint and pistol whipped. It was the only moment in my life I was 100% certain I was going to die. I remember very clearly being face-down on the floor and making a point to tightly interlace my fingers behind my head in the hope the bones in my hands would deflect the bullet enough to save my life.

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Damn, where was this?

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At a Blockbuster Music store.

Never been in anything close to that situation so no clue the emotions and thoughts in the situation but if you were that sure that was it did you consider fighting back because you had nothing to lose?

Fairview said:

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Never been in anything close to that situation so no clue the emotions and thoughts in the situation but if you were that sure that was it did you consider fighting back because you had nothing to lose?

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I was outnumbered, had been pistol whipped, and no amount of money was worth my life. "Do what you have to do to stay alive" was all I could think of. When it was almost over and they finally realized I wasn't lying about not having a key to the drop safe that was when they made me lie face-down on the floor. When that happened, I figured they were going to shoot me on the way out.

It was a lot to process and almost 30 years later I still remember every detail of that night. I felt really bad that the opening crew did not know what happened before they arrived in the morning. They were greeted by a bloody print of my face on the floor.

Ryan the Temp said:

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Jack Cheese said:

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Ryan the Temp said:

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When I was 18 I was working retail and got robbed at gunpoint and pistol whipped. It was the only moment in my life I was 100% certain I was going to die. I remember very clearly being face-down on the floor and making a point to tightly interlace my fingers behind my head in the hope the bones in my hands would deflect the bullet enough to save my life.

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Damn, where was this?

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At a Blockbuster Music store.

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Probably deserved it because of y'all's draconian late fees!!!



But seriously, that's horribad. Sorry about it...

There was a music store too? Like you rent CD's?

3rd Platoon said:

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I once told my wife to "calm down."

I have no idea how I'm still alive.

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Same.

A few years ago my wife and I were having a cocktail at home when I fell out (sudden cardiac death). My wife called 911 and performed cpr for 10 or 15 minutes till fire department ems arrived. They shocked 9 times and put a thumper on my chest. Got to the hospital and was shocked 4 more times. Woke up 3 days later.

Wife saved my life.

one safe place said:

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When I was about six, I was playing in a pond at my uncle's place. The water near the bank was waist deep to me, and I was pulling a duck decoy on a string. There were flowers or lilies blooming near the bank and honey bees were working them. I took two or three steps further out so I wouldn't get stung and stepped into much deeper water, over my head. I fought to try to reach the surface but could not and had swallowed water in the process and then the fight ended. Everything I could see was an orange colored light, not a bright light. And the orange was somewhat muted, or pale, not bright at all. I could hear some sort of humming sound though it seemed I didn't hear it through my ears, but heard it, or felt it, through my body. Later, certainly not at that moment, I recalled trying to look beyond the orange light, like trying to peer and see what was beyond the orange light. I was no longer fighting, I had given up, seemed just to be floating and looking.

There were five or six kids, my mom pregnant with my youngest brother, and she did a head count and there was one kid missing. She screamed, my dad saw my hair just under the surface of the water, jumped in (he was wearing a suit so must have been to a funeral) and pulled me out. I vomited water for a good bit.

When I was 22 or so, I was working derricks on a workover rig at Spindletop and had just come down out of the derrick. We had pulled the pipe out of the hole, 63 stands, and were checking a milling shoe. The weather had been nasty all day, and there was something weird about it. Never seen anything like it before or since. The sky turned the weirdest green color and the wind (which had been blowing all day) really got nasty. The rig blew over and two of us on the floor were dumped off it as it started to lean over as the rig leaned over.

When I hit the ground, I jumped up and ran knowing the derrick and pipe was falling on me if I kept going. Once I cleared the second mud tank I made a lunge to the right so as to not be under the derrick. After a couple of strides, I tripped over something, hit the ground, turned my head and saw the derrick full of pipe falling to the ground. At this point it was only 15 feet from impact. I covered my head with my hand and arms, like that was going to do any good, lol. It looked as if it was falling on me when I looked up. The derrick hit maybe 20 feet from me, but the wind was howling so hard I could not hear it hit the ground. I was so full of adrenaline I jumped up and began to run. After a few steps I froze. There was decent sized pools of water everywhere and I knew there were power lines in a couple places near the rig (this field was all pumping unit wells, so needed electricity). I was fearful that the derrick had fallen through and pulled down live electric wires and if I stepped into the wrong puddle it was going to be a bad day. I looked up and counted the lines on the nearest pole and the same number was on each side of the derrick, so none had been pulled down. So I took off running again for maybe 75 yards before I came to my senses.

For 3 or 4 months after that event, I would have daymares, in which I looked up at that falling derrick, again it appeared to be falling on me, and would shudder for a second or two.

One New Year's Eve, a few of us were rabbit hunting with headlights on property we didn't have permission to be on. I think the caretaker who lived on the place was likely drunk, because he had never come after us but this night he did. He shot at us about 8 or 10 times, a couple were near misses, lol.

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A "near miss" is a hit. Who was shot twice?

BwdAg said:

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A few years ago my wife and I were having a cocktail at home when I fell out (sudden cardiac death). My wife called 911 and performed cpr for 10 or 15 minutes till fire department ems arrived. They shocked 9 times and put a thumper on my chest. Got to the hospital and was shocked 4 more times. Woke up 3 days later.

Wife saved my life.

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Quote:

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A "near miss" is a hit.

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Carlin

This is not true. Sounds like you've only visited Beale St. and Mud Island.

BwdAg said:

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A few years ago my wife and I were having a cocktail at home when I fell out (sudden cardiac death). My wife called 911 and performed cpr for 10 or 15 minutes till fire department ems arrived. They shocked 9 times and put a thumper on my chest. Got to the hospital and was shocked 4 more times. Woke up 3 days later.

Wife saved my life.

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Did you wake up and tell her to calm down?

J/K. Glad you're alive and whole. Scary deal.

Ptery83 said:

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This is not true. Sounds like you've only visited Beale St. and Mud Island.

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Funnily enough, I've been through Memphis maybe 6 times and have never actually been to Beale Street.

Lex said:

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There was a music store too? Like you rent CD's?

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Sold.

Ryan the Temp said:

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Lex said:

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There was a music store too? Like you rent CD's?

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Sold.

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What city was this?

Not to derail but those stores were awesome. They had the listening bar area where they'd crack open whatever CD so you could listen to it before buying it.

Died on a life flight. Was gone for 40+ seconds before flight paras managed to fight off the forever sleep for me. Apparently got real close to it again on the table. Car accident.

Numerous overseas ME conflict stuff. More than most I would wager. Also nearly drowned in San Diego as a kid. Small rip tide got me but wasn't too bad really and should have been ok until it rolled me along sea floor and wrapped me in kelp. Managed to get free eventually and surface but when I say it was literally the last second from panicked energy to going limp, it could not be any closer. I think I would have been ok in the end though because a good samaritan did notice I went under and didn't come back up and was on his way to investigate when I surfaced. He actually swam me back as I was completely spent.

I hate the ocean to this day. F that and F everything in it.

Eliminatus said:

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Died on a life flight. Was gone for 40+ seconds before flight paras managed to fight off the forever sleep for me. Apparently got real close to it again on the table. Car accident.

Numerous overseas ME conflict stuff. More than most I would wager. Also nearly drowned in San Diego as a kid. Small rip tide got me but wasn't too bad really and should have been ok until it rolled me along sea floor and wrapped me in kelp. Managed to get free eventually and surface but when I say it was literally the last second from panicked energy to going limp, it could not be any closer. I think I would have been ok in the end though because a good samaritan did notice I went under and didn't come back up and was on his way to investigate when I surfaced. He actually swam me back as I was completely spent.

I hate the ocean to this day. F that and F everything in it.

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Did you see or experience anything in those 40+ seconds?

-Got caught in an undertow on the Medina River as a kid, luckily the old man saw and got me out. All I remember was being able to see the clear blue sky from under water and my arm being out of the water.
-left a hospital with arm in a sling, managed to get my seat belt done about a minute before we were hit and flipped over at I-45 and 242.
-hit by an IED on a foot patrol in Iraq, May 10, 2008. It was only a jug of HME and buried deep into hard ground so the blast went mostly straight up and not out. Still took rocks and **** to the face and blew out both eardrums.
-small arms fire hitting the bullet proof glass on the humvee gun turett. Pinned down by a PKM behind a humvee in an ambush.
-using a chain saw 20 years ago and got the chain in a bind and jerked it back and knicked jeans inside of my right leg. No one was around so probably would have bled out had it cut the femoral artery.

I'm just copy / pasting my post on the similar thread from 2021

Pushed my wife out of the way to avoid an asleep-at-the-wheel driver that came barreling into the parking lot we were in and got hit by it myself. Was in a coma for several weeks and woke up minus an amputated leg.

No Donald Trump sock telling the story of almost being shot in the head in PA?

It's like I don't even know you people anymore.

"You people"?