Hot or Not? Joanna Gaines

8,719 Views | 41 Replies | Last: 6 mo ago by gkaggie08
Athanasius
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Sea Speed
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1 on the binary but absolutely not hot.
Know Your Enemy
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No
Bruce Almighty
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Not hot, but definitely better than your average late 40s woman.
The Porkchop Express
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who's gonna be the guy from Dallas or San Antonio who tells us he sees 18 better looking women at his surburban Target every Wednesday?
Serious Lee
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she looks like one of those Goobacks from South Park.
DannyDuberstein
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She looks like her dad White Eaaaaaaarrrrrrrllllll chased down a korean woman, laid on her with great force, and 9 months later she crapped out an HGTV champion
FIDO*98*
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The Porkchop Express said:

who's gonna be the guy from Dallas or San Antonio who tells us he sees 18 better looking women at his surburban Target every Wednesday?


Do you live in a poor place with other poor people where that's not the norm?
ArlingtonAg2015
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Uh, no.
javajaws
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delete thread, ban OP.
Duckhook
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I've already been through this with a buddy of mine who thinks she's kinda hot. My reply to him.

[url=https://ibb.co/rHqkHyj][/url]
image upload
Ags4DaWin
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Bangable does NOT mean HOT to men.

Here are the categories men put women into.

FUGLY- No amount of alcohol could make me dumb enough to go there

MIRAGES- The right amount of alcohol or the right lighting or the right amount of desperation makes her look good enough to bang. Outside of the right conditions we are asking ourselves WTH happened and why we made such a horrible mistake.

BANGABLE- If she is available, and easy enough to get with, would bang. One night stands or a few weekends worth of fun, but not good looking enough for a relationship and the bull**** that comes with it.

ATTRACTIVE- Would bang repeatedly and long term until we got tired of her bull***** If she has a good personality and her level of Bull **** is low enough we would seriously consider a relationship. If her bull**** is high or her personality sucks we ditch after 1-3 months before she can trap us with emotional blackmail.

HOT- Her personality doesn't mean Jack ***** We would risk it all and happily let this woman destroy us, mind, body, and soul so we could have the memory of being with her for as long as she deigned to bang our brains out.

Now a woman can migrate easily between the BANGABLE category and the ATTRACTIVE category depending on her personality and level of bull*****

This is Joanna Gaines. She would be good for a couple of weekends, but her voice, man hands, and personality quickly drop her into the bangable category. And in the bangable category you dust that chick after 3-4 weeks max before she can trap u into anything long term.

A woman who is in the HOT category stays there......



Ya know.....until she turns 35




Or unless she is a celebrity.

Joanna, while a celebrity is not hot.
maroon barchetta
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Did you factor in net worth?
Ags4DaWin
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Assuming this question is a mix of snark and sincerity...

Most men don't give a **** about a woman's net worth unless they are worthless tool bags. Studies show this.

Men rank women on their attractiveness the same whether they are a CEO or a server at Chik Fil A

Only women and men without prospects care about income.
maroon barchetta
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According to this video, women care about money regardless of "prospects".

TequilaMockingbird
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She's a Waco 8.
Husky Boy Jr.
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Texags posters be like

superunknown
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DannyDuberstein said:

She looks like her dad White Eaaaaaaarrrrrrrllllll chased down a korean woman, laid on her with great force, and 9 months later she crapped out an HGTV champion
infinity ag
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She looks good. She is 46, so don't compare her with a 21 year old. She's kept herself in shape too and not become a fat bomb.
infinity ag
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Ags4DaWin said:

Assuming this question is a mix of snark and sincerity...

Most men don't give a **** about a woman's net worth unless they are worthless tool bags. Studies show this.

Men rank women on their attractiveness the same whether they are a CEO or a server at Chik Fil A

Only women and men without prospects care about income.

You are so right.
The other part to this is women care a lot about a man's money and title (though they deny it because it is shallow). A woman will come to a man and talk about her job, her salary to impress him and expect appreciation and admiration. The man just looks at her and says "so?". The woman is confused... don't men like high achieving like women like high achieving men? All she had to do was dress nice, smell nice, smile and look pretty and she could have him eating out of her hands.
Atreides Ornithopter
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infinity ag said:

She looks good. She is 46, so don't compare her with a 21 year old. She's kept herself in shape too and not become a fat bomb.


Asians don't normally become fat bombs to begin with
Milwaukees Best Light
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Will she love me long time?
jwoodmd
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Ags4DaWin said:

Bangable does NOT mean HOT to men.

Here are the categories men put women into.

FUGLY- No amount of alcohol could make me dumb enough to go there

MIRAGES- The right amount of alcohol or the right lighting or the right amount of desperation makes her look good enough to bang. Outside of the right conditions we are asking ourselves WTH happened and why we made such a horrible mistake.

BANGABLE- If she is available, and easy enough to get with, would bang. One night stands or a few weekends worth of fun, but not good looking enough for a relationship and the bull**** that comes with it.

ATTRACTIVE- Would bang repeatedly and long term until we got tired of her bull***** If she has a good personality and her level of Bull **** is low enough we would seriously consider a relationship. If her bull**** is high or her personality sucks we ditch after 1-3 months before she can trap us with emotional blackmail.

HOT- Her personality doesn't mean Jack ***** We would risk it all and happily let this woman destroy us, mind, body, and soul so we could have the memory of being with her for as long as she deigned to bang our brains out.

Now a woman can migrate easily between the BANGABLE category and the ATTRACTIVE category depending on her personality and level of bull*****

This is Joanna Gaines. She would be good for a couple of weekends, but her voice, man hands, and personality quickly drop her into the bangable category. And in the bangable category you dust that chick after 3-4 weeks max before she can trap u into anything long term.

A woman who is in the HOT category stays there......



Ya know.....until she turns 35




Or unless she is a celebrity.

Joanna, while a celebrity is not hot.
Hell has frozen over. I starred one of your posts.
Fairview
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Atreides Ornithopter said:

infinity ag said:

She looks good. She is 46, so don't compare her with a 21 year old. She's kept herself in shape too and not become a fat bomb.


Asians don't normally become fat bombs to begin with



Vince Blake
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The Porkchop Express said:

who's gonna be the guy from Dallas or San Antonio who tells us he sees 18 better looking women at his surburban Target every Wednesday?

Plano Trader Joe's.
YokelRidesAgain
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The Porkchop Express said:

who's gonna be the guy from Dallas or San Antonio who tells us he sees 18 better looking women at his churro stand surburban Target every Wednesday?
No material on this site is intended to be a substitute for professional medical advice, diagnosis or treatment. See full Medical Disclaimer.
maroon barchetta
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YokelRidesAgain said:

The Porkchop Express said:

who's gonna be the guy from Dallas or San Antonio who tells us he sees 18 better looking women at his churro stand surburban Target every Wednesday?



[/Charles Barkley]
The Lost
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Ags4DaWin said:

Bangable does NOT mean HOT to men.

Here are the categories men put women into.

FUGLY- No amount of alcohol could make me dumb enough to go there

MIRAGES- The right amount of alcohol or the right lighting or the right amount of desperation makes her look good enough to bang. Outside of the right conditions we are asking ourselves WTH happened and why we made such a horrible mistake.

BANGABLE- If she is available, and easy enough to get with, would bang. One night stands or a few weekends worth of fun, but not good looking enough for a relationship and the bull**** that comes with it.

ATTRACTIVE- Would bang repeatedly and long term until we got tired of her bull***** If she has a good personality and her level of Bull **** is low enough we would seriously consider a relationship. If her bull**** is high or her personality sucks we ditch after 1-3 months before she can trap us with emotional blackmail.

HOT- Her personality doesn't mean Jack ***** We would risk it all and happily let this woman destroy us, mind, body, and soul so we could have the memory of being with her for as long as she deigned to bang our brains out.

Now a woman can migrate easily between the BANGABLE category and the ATTRACTIVE category depending on her personality and level of bull*****

This is Joanna Gaines. She would be good for a couple of weekends, but her voice, man hands, and personality quickly drop her into the bangable category. And in the bangable category you dust that chick after 3-4 weeks max before she can trap u into anything long term.

A woman who is in the HOT category stays there......



Ya know.....until she turns 35




Or unless she is a celebrity.

Joanna, while a celebrity is not hot.
You had me until 35… I get we can't all be Leonardo and 26, but 35 is pushing it
Ags4DaWin
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GB joke
jwoodmd
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The Lost said:

Ags4DaWin said:

Bangable does NOT mean HOT to men.

Here are the categories men put women into.

FUGLY- No amount of alcohol could make me dumb enough to go there

MIRAGES- The right amount of alcohol or the right lighting or the right amount of desperation makes her look good enough to bang. Outside of the right conditions we are asking ourselves WTH happened and why we made such a horrible mistake.

BANGABLE- If she is available, and easy enough to get with, would bang. One night stands or a few weekends worth of fun, but not good looking enough for a relationship and the bull**** that comes with it.

ATTRACTIVE- Would bang repeatedly and long term until we got tired of her bull***** If she has a good personality and her level of Bull **** is low enough we would seriously consider a relationship. If her bull**** is high or her personality sucks we ditch after 1-3 months before she can trap us with emotional blackmail.

HOT- Her personality doesn't mean Jack ***** We would risk it all and happily let this woman destroy us, mind, body, and soul so we could have the memory of being with her for as long as she deigned to bang our brains out.

Now a woman can migrate easily between the BANGABLE category and the ATTRACTIVE category depending on her personality and level of bull*****

This is Joanna Gaines. She would be good for a couple of weekends, but her voice, man hands, and personality quickly drop her into the bangable category. And in the bangable category you dust that chick after 3-4 weeks max before she can trap u into anything long term.

A woman who is in the HOT category stays there......



Ya know.....until she turns 35




Or unless she is a celebrity.

Joanna, while a celebrity is not hot.
You had me until 35… I get we can't all be Leonardo and 26, but 35 is pushing it
Enjoy!

https://texags.com/forums/12/topics/3289372/1
Aggie Dad 26
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She aiiight
AggieArchitect04
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The Porkchop Express said:

who's gonna be the guy from Dallas or San Antonio who tells us he sees 18 better looking women at his surburban Target every Wednesday?

I'll be that guy.

I'm from San Antonio and was with 3 hot women tonight. All in their mid-40s. Joanna Gaines couldn't touch them.

Also, she's probably only had sex with Chip her entire life. Imagine that.

Joanna Gaines looks like she got kicked by a horse. Or is one. Can't decide which.
infinity ag
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Atreides Ornithopter said:

infinity ag said:

She looks good. She is 46, so don't compare her with a 21 year old. She's kept herself in shape too and not become a fat bomb.


Asians don't normally become fat bombs to begin with

They do after a certain age. Much later than white ladies.


infinity ag
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Fairview said:

Atreides Ornithopter said:

infinity ag said:

She looks good. She is 46, so don't compare her with a 21 year old. She's kept herself in shape too and not become a fat bomb.


Asians don't normally become fat bombs to begin with






Ah I see you got there before I did
Tree Hugger
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Not bad for someone who has had 5 kids. She is annoying as hell though.
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