Fond memories of HISD subs ...
When I was in HS in the 80s/90s, we had a substitute teacher who had previously been a model for the Marlboro Man cigarette ads who encouraged us all to call him by his first name of Chuck. He never wanted to do anything including once when we had a test on a Friday. As we all watched, he put the test in the teacher's desk and said, "Well, I can't find where she left the test, so let's call it a day and you guys can take an early lunch."
A second sub was a young guy who claimed to play Double A baseball for the SF Giants. He once said to my history class, "If you're going to drive drunk, make sure you have a car." Apparently he had told that joke to every class that day. He was not asked back.
A third sub could not stay awake in class. Once in health we were watching a film with the lights off when we all heard a huge CRASH. He was sitting with his feet up on the desk, had fallen asleep, turned on his side as if in bed, and fallen on the floor.
Then there was the mom of the 2nd hottest girl in my class. The mom was a frequent sub but she was dogface ugly and had a white person's fro. Many feared if they dated/married the girl, she would grow up to look like the mom. Granted, I had no chance in hell with her, but it was a great feeling to tell your friends, "Yeah, I don't want a wife looking like THAT."