Give me your worst airline stories.

11,797 Views | 85 Replies | Last: 5 yr ago by rebag00
JABQ04
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Flew Houston to Tokyo straight through once. That was ****ing miserable.

Escorted the remains of one of my Soldiers killed in a training accident back to his home of record and had to bite my tongue over hearing people beeching about how loading the casket was delaying them 5 or 10 mins. That whole series of flights was just screwed up. Booked through Delta, had to drive from Ft Polk, LA to George Bush, fly to Atlanta, fly to KC, MO then drive to Springfield, MO. Long ass miserable day.
Trident 88
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Worst flight - in the back of a C130 cargo plane with 6 other Marines from Southern California to eastern Canada to Frankfurt, Germany to Saudi Arabia in August, 1990. My battalion (1st Bn, 5th Mar) was the first one to fly over for Desert Shield, and my plane arrived in Riyadh 24 hours in advance of everyone else.

Best flight - riding in 1st class of a civilian plane from Saudi Arabia to Italy to Shamrock, Ireland to New York City (where we flew around the Statue of Liberty) to Southern California in March, 1991. I slept most of the way and only woke up for meals and the 360 flyby of Lady Liberty.
$30,000 Millionaire
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Worst domestic: Had changed a flight to a later one and ended up with a sub par coach seat vs booking first. SFO to DFW flight around a season change. We went into a holding pattern and eventually diverted to Tulsa. They wouldn't let us off the plane for a long time, eventually the weather clears and then during pre flight checks a mechanical issue is observed. Lots more waiting on the plane, then off. Eventually take off at 4:30 AM, land around 5:10 AM. Literally got home, took a shower, and went to work for an important meeting.

Worst international: SN flight from Brussels to Nice, France. Terrible turbulence exasperated by flying DFW-ORD-BRU right before where I didn't get any sleep. The flight took a lot out of me and I hadn't eaten therefore couldn't barf. I think I went straight to the hotel and slept for 16 hours, ended up waking up really disoriented the next day.
MisterScott
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PanzerAggie06 said:

I was living in Dutch Harbor Alaska (the town in Deadliest Catch series) at a time when a fisherman went bat s**t crazy and murdered two of his crewmates on the fishing boat he was on. He beat them to death then tied their bodies to the anchor and submerged them. Anyway, he was promptly caught and after being held by the local police for a few days the Alaska State Troopers arrived to transport him via a commercial flight to Anchorage.

Anyway, no one bothered to check the flight manifest or they would have seen that the other 8 members of the boat's crew were also on the same flight. Being fishermen they were hammer faced wasted when they boarded and continued to drink on the plane. About halfway thru the flight they, in their infinite wisdom, decided it was a good time to seek justice and kill the guy who had murdered their crewmates. So they launched an all-out attack. I was sitting two rows behind the killer with his trooper escorts and got to witness the chaos first hand. Multiple drunk fishermen lunging over seats to try to get the guy with the troopers throwing punches and blocking the full beer cans being thrown at them. Finally, they pulled their weapons and things got really scary. The troopers got the fishermen to back down long enough to retreat to the back of the plane with the killer and stayed there for the rest of the flight.

When we finally landed in Anchorage the plane went to an isolated part of the airport and a SWAT team quickly boarded to restore order. All the crew members who had attacked were arrested of course but they did not go quietly. It was nuts. One a positive note I did receive a voucher for two round trip tickets anywhere the airline flew.

Was it a Ravn flight? I love going through security at ANC and wondering how many drunks headed to Nome or other reaches have loaded weapons....
Class of 1996
PanzerAggie06
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No. It was Mark Air an airline that has since gone under.

I was at the Anchorage airport about a year after the event I described when there was an incident with some sort of hunting rifle. Some guy was flying out after a hunting trip and the ticket agent had him open the rifle case. I guess she had to verify it was clear. Well, apparently it wasn't, I have no idea how, it discharged and blew a hole in the Alaska Airlines sign behind the ticket desk. Needless to say the hunter had a nice long talk with the cops.
MisterScott
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histag10 said:

Great Lakes (aka Great Mistakes) from Dickinson to Denver.

I feel this needs no explanation if you have heard of Great Lakes.
Denver-based Ag. No explanation needed....

But for the poster that asked, imagine planes smaller than the old Saab turbos that ran in and out of BCS flying up and over the Rockies....
Class of 1996
MisterScott
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JP76 said:

My grandparents were at the airport Tuesday morning in a Vegas to come back to Texas when 9/11 happened. I think all flights were suspended until Thursday or Friday of that week. Tried to rent a car to come back, tried to rent a uhaul, tried to take a bus and everything was sold out. They finally found a charter bus where the driver spoke no English that was heading El Paso. Then they took a rental car from El Paso to BCS. I don't remember exactly what they had to pay but people were making a killing on stranded folks desperate to get home.

In the early 2000's right after 9/11 I was in the airport in Vegas and had already passed security. Some idiot decided they were going to run past security and they ended up making everyone get rechecked after they evacuated the secured side.


Not my story but had a relative fly on Spirit airlines. Flight was like at 5 or 6 am out of Atlanta back to Houston and they were 10 minutes late so they missed it. They ended up going to Milwaukee. Then back to Florida. Finally made it to Houston at 2 am the next morning.

Ah Spirit. Never had the pleasure. Walk through Terminal E at DFW past the Spirit gates to get to United. I think to myself, I didn't know Florida was an airline.
Class of 1996
evestor1
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SWA from Houston - New Orleans

Last one to board plane ... no seats available ... I ask the flight attendant what is going on and she points to back row with only two people in it. Like nothing i have ever seen. Two men where touching each other across three seats! They said I had to ride in that seat. So I taxi'd and took off while sitting on the lap of two men with a seat belt extender around my 170lb waste. After take off I walked to back and they allowed me to land in jump seat. at back of plane.

Window seat guy was approximately 6'6" and 400.
Aisle seat guy was approximately 6'0 and 275.

I still have NO idea how they took up so much room. They looked like sumo wrestlers while sitting down.
MisterScott
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evestor1 said:

SWA from Houston - New Orleans

Last one to board plane ... no seats available ... I ask the flight attendant what is going on and she points to back row with only two people in it. Like nothing i have ever seen. Two men where touching each other across three seats! They said I had to ride in that seat. So I taxi'd and took off while sitting on the lap of two men with a seat belt extender around my 170lb waste. After take off I walked to back and they allowed me to land in jump seat. at back of plane.

Window seat guy was approximately 6'6" and 400.
Aisle seat guy was approximately 6'0 and 275.

I still have NO idea how they took up so much room. They looked like sumo wrestlers while sitting down.

I am surprised they didn't have to trim or rebalance the plane. Ironic that airline seats are getting smaller while we, as a population are getting larger.

One of my two stories and this one is short. HOU to MSY on Southwest. Flying back to NOLA when I lived there. Had helped a buddy move back to Houston. Landing on a clear day south to north on the approach that takes you across the river. I am in the window and as we pass threshold I see the white lines still like 500 feet above the runway. Maybe more. I am like he is going around.... They the bottom drops out. I turn to my buddy, and am like "hang on". He's like why? Then we hit the runway with such force I am surprised the airframe was not bent or we didn't blow every tire. Nary a word was muttered by anyone on the plane including the FA's as we taxi'd and deplaned. I suspect that plane was inspected closely.
Class of 1996
histag10
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MisterScott said:

histag10 said:

Great Lakes (aka Great Mistakes) from Dickinson to Denver.

I feel this needs no explanation if you have heard of Great Lakes.
Denver-based Ag. No explanation needed....

But for the poster that asked, imagine planes smaller than the old Saab turbos that ran in and out of BCS flying up and over the Rockies....


I'm pretty sure the plane from that flight was pieced together from parts not destroyed in other crashes. The emergency exit handle/cover was on upside down, flight tape all over the wings, noticeably missing bolts in places on the wings, ash trays in arm rests. Had engineers trying to do the .ath on whether or not the plane could take off with the amount of people/luggage on board- eventually we were told they thought it would be okay. I feel like we drove for miles down the runway before we actually left the ground.

They served water and coffee. I asked if they had anything to go in the coffee (creamer, sugar... whiskey...). The flight attendant responded with "I think I have a peppermint in my purse"
TxFig
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gigemJTH12 said:

I am on my way back from Vegas and didn't get an upgrade to 1st class, so I am jammed in the back of a Continental flight hoping that they close the door asap since there is no one in the seat next to me (I am in the aisle seat). That's when I hear it. The unmistakable sound of a grotesquely fat sack of goo's thunderous footsteps coming down the jetway towards the plane. I think the plane actually began to slightly rock as this Oreo hoarding tub of sheet approached the door. As this rhino thighed hump landed the first hoof on board he gasped and nearly sucked all the oxygen off the freaking plane al la Chuck Norris. I couldn't quite see him yet as there was a hillbilly sitting in front of me with a hat he stole from that crazy old neck who used to be on Gunsmoke (more on the rodeo crowd who was in town later). The guy sitting in the window seat had a horrified look on his face and muttered something to the effect of, "awww ****". A quick glance around confirmed that the slowly approaching, heavy sweating, chimichanga nuking Orcan was in fact inbound to the seat in-between me and the poor ******* sitting in the window seat. When Kong (referred to as SOG Sack of Goo from here on out) was about 15 rows away the guy sitting behind me just started laughing his a$$ off, uncontrollably. He continued to laugh as he verbally noted that SOG had a rather large bag of fast food which he was clutching like it was the hope diamond (he had a bag in the other which turned out to be a travel scrabble game). SOG couldn't hear him as he had taken a break at aisle 23 to rest, I actually thought me might down one of the three burgers he had crammed into his feedbag. As SOG finished his cool down and began sauntering towards me he came into my full view.

Couple observations here: First, this guy was at least 4 bills and might have made 5 hundy after mowing down the grub in the feed bag he had in his paws. Second, dude had a serious case of gator arms which was further accentuated by the set of meat curtains he called a chest. Third, this guy hadn't seen his crank in years due to the heinous keg fuda jutting out like patch's deek at an SPCA open house. Fourth, SOG had alarmingly small feet, I mean dude was pretty skilled at balancing all that goo on those size 8's, oh, and big surprise that SOG was sans socks and his shoes were untied.

When SOG arrived at row 31 I had already grudgingly accepted my fate and had rose out of my seat to let him collapse into the middle seat. Guy in the window seat was just staring blankly into the bulkhead shaking his head and the guy in the seat behind me was pretty much weeping from laughing so hard. That laughter would soon change to horror as SOG had brought a few friends with him on board. Their names were a$$ funk, horrific body odor, & sleep apnea.

Needless to say after they long thirty yard hike from the terminal to the plane, SOG was ready to cover down on some grub. Before ordering the belt extender to secure his gargantuan ass to the seat he already had a couple dozen fries smashed into his enormous pie hole. That's when I realized that this guy smelled like rancid cheese from a goat's nuts. I almost laughed but realized I was going to smell this for the next 2 hours. I had lost sight of the dude in the window seat and feared for his well being especially if SOG mistakenly identified any of his fingers as fries. Shortly after take off SOG basically sheets his size 68W trousers. I can't state it any other way. Dude, grunted and the sound that followed basically equated to mud hitting curtains. I heard something from the guy by the window but do to the distance the sound had to travel around SOG I couldn't tell what the hell it was. I started belly laughing as did several around us including the guy behind me who had not stopped laughing since SOG arrived. SOG didn't seem to care at all and continued his feast. The smell that followed can only be described as Chile Releno A$$. All laughter ceased and I actually thought I might vomit, my biggest fear was that this guys a$$ funk might knock the plane out of the sky. We had several more NBC a$$ releases from SOG an all were equally devastating. I stood in the galley for most of the flight. When I returned to my seat SOG was in a cheeseburger induced coma and was snoring very loudly and was sweating profusely. His travel scrabble game was littered all over his carcass and there were letters in my seat and on the floor. I still couldn't see the guy in the window seat but was sure he was dead by now. I returned to the galley to ask the attendant if I could sit in one of their jump seats for the remainder of the flight and she just burst out laughing and apologized.

Anyhow, I hate fat people and travel scrabble.

It's rare, but every now and again a story will popup on the 'net that is bound to be a classic. A post that will live on for years to come. You never know what forum or platform it might happen in, so you dutifully read them all in the hopes that you might see one every couple of years. I think the last one I read was something a friend of mine posted over on the OLD ShaggyBevo site where he described his worst sexual encounter using MS Paint (the phrase "Angry Dolphin" will forever have special meaning).

Edit:

I see that this story was originally posted in 2005. It's good to see that it has stood the test of time to be counted as a timeless classic.
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Chris Barnes
Retired A&M IT geek - now beekeeper
http://www.cornerstonehoneybees.com/
TxFig
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I'll throw my story out here, even though it's not THAT dramatic.

Back when I was an undergrad here at A&M (mid-1980's), I used my spring break to go with a group of guys on a mission trip to Guatemala. When we arrived in Guatemala City, we took a 12 hour bus ride to somewhere in the middle of nowhere in the mountains, and spent the next 4 days building houses for the indigenous Indian people who still lived there.

Now if you've ever taken a bus ride in a 3rd world country... in the mountains... let me explain that it really is about what it sounds like. 2 lane (almost) roads on a mountain side with no guard rails. Hair-pin turns that the bus had to take in 3 parts (go forward, backup - with the back of the bus hanging off the side of the cliff, then go forward).

But eh, we were college kids who were too young and stupid to know better.


But this is a plane thread, right?

So at the end of the week, the guy in charge decides that we probably shouldn't take the bus ride home. He finds some local airport in the middle of the Guatemalan mountain jungle. 12 of us arrive and drop our bags off the bus. The pilot starts eyeing us with a really concerned look. Says something in whatever Spanish dialect they use in the mountains of Guatemala, then motions us to load our bags in the "cargo area". After litterally body-slamming against the bags to force them in so the door will shut, we begin climbing into the passenger area.

I should have mentioned at this point that this is a 10 passenger plane with a prop on each wing. 12 of us are flying (not including the pilot). Somehow we all manage to fit. I'm sitting in a window seat under the right wing, above the wheels. Before the pilot climbs in, we see him talking to the bus driver who brought us to the "airport". Each of them grab a wing and push it backwards down the road we had come in on.

Pilot gets in, pushes the throttle to max (open cockpit so everyone can see everything), then releases the break. We taxi down the runway - all the way to the end. The runways just kind of ends ... at the edge of a cliff. We taxi out and the wheels never come off the ground - the plane just kind of goes off the edge of the cliff, dropping what seems like 200-300 feet before we get enough air speed to begin climbing.


As I said, most of us were too stupid to be scared. I think most of us wanted to do it again.
--
Chris Barnes
Retired A&M IT geek - now beekeeper
http://www.cornerstonehoneybees.com/
MisterScott
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Worst story, and if this is as bad as it gets, then I am fine, considering all the really bad things that happen hurtling in a tube through the air at 500+mph. I was in NYC and had a late day scheduled flight from LGA (yes, yes - third world charm though when renovated the terminal and gates will be great, but still needs more runway). Get the warning from United that storms are expected in the evening. LGA shuts down to one runway if you look at it wrong. Rebook for early afternoon flight. Get to airport, board and we taxi. And we stop. And we park. While waiting for our take off slot, the rain moves in. We are on the runway for hours and finally time out and head back to gate. Meanwhile, regularly scheduled flights LGA to DEN leave on time, including my original flight. Finally, 7 hours late, we leave for Denver. A-319 is the plane. We get close to Denver and I feel the tell tale motions of doing racetracks in the sky. Log onto Flight Aware and sure enough we are in a holding pattern somewhere over SODAK. Weather and wind in Denver. Hotboxed by weather. Well, as we are holding, we go bingo fuel and have to divert, to, you guessed it, Cheyenne WY. Not Colorado Springs, not any other larger airport. But Cheyenne, a multi horse, but one gate town.

So we land and it is a parking lot. Probably 11:30 PM or so MT. Planes everywhere. There is a local family/ground crew trying to manage things near the general aviation terminal. Chaos. There are passengers getting very, very roudy in couch (I was F on that flight). And there are folks whose final destination was Cheyenne.

Well they cracked the door and brought stairs over but we were not allowed to deplane. Some passengers begin to force their way up and are yelling at the FA's in coach to be let off the plane. The FA's retreat to First and two dead heading pilots position themselves at the boundary between First and Coach. Pilot comes out and says they cannot let anyone off. And....that when we were on decent into Cheyenne, we lost one of the three radar or guidance systems on the plane and that we cannot take off. Per FAA rules. United working on a relief plane. Anger boils over but no violence, though I believe we were close.

As it turns out, the relief plane turns out to be a bus at 1 PM the next day.

Well things do boil over. The pilots decide to move us to The Gate that is occupied by an American regional jet at the terminal but about 1:30 AM. They allow us to deplane.

I was sitting next to an ex-military guy and we had been chatting the entire time. As soon as we started moving to the gate, we both got on Uber. Uber at 1:30 AM in Cheyenne. Uber to Denver International. Boom, we got one. I spent nearly an hour and half sideways in the back seat of an old king-cab (not crew cab) Nissan pickup with the military guy in the passenger front seat he was a much bigger dude than me. The driver was a local retail store manager and maybe a card shy of a full deck and the truck reeked of stale cigs. But we got to DEN. Nearly 15 hours after the adventure started.
Class of 1996
rebag00
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I was stuck on the tarmac for 8 hours on a Northwest Airlines 757 in Detroit New Years 1999. How bad was it? I got a check from NWA for $1,750. I luckily(?) had eaten at Wendy's and had used the bathroom prior to boarding. We did have a crew, and the plane taxied out thinking they could get out but then the snow plows keeping the taxiways and runway open stopped running as it was pretty much white out conditions at that point. Only water or coffee for the next 8 hours. The bathrooms ended up being closed off after about 4 hours as they started to overflow. Threats of violence, screaming children and adults, helpless flight crew. They finally got our plane back to a gate around daybreak. It was nightmarish. NWA settled a class action lawsuit two years later for 7 million with the passengers on the planes. It also began the push in earnest to have a codified set of rights for passengers. It's been a while and I don't remember all the details. It's definitely one of those situations you choose to forget about as fast as you can.
sawthemoffxx
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Did anyone try to fake a medical emergency?
MisterScott
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sawthemoffxx said:

Did anyone try to fake a medical emergency?
No but I had an older gentleman have a grand mal seizure behind me on a flight. Very terrifying as my son suffers from seizures. He was okay.

Funny thing happened last week. I heard a commotion in Coach and a lot of FA's running around. I was heads down on my computer and Glenfarkels on the rocks utilizing what United calls "internet". I got up to use the petrie dish of a commode as was talking to the FA. She said a woman siting in the center seat was apparently loaded up on "mood enhancers" and then had a couple of pops and proceeds to pass out. Older woman, past the cougar stage. Leaning passed out on a younger gentleman. Literally passed out with her hand on his junk.

He was apparently not happy with the state of affairs but did not want to cause a commotion. Kudos. I am reminded of the Tom Brady SNL skit on sexual harassment at work. Worth a google. I bet if the woman was 32, brunette with some nice sweater puppies, there would have been a blanket straddling both seats... Just saying.
Class of 1996
rebag00
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No one had to fake anything. You could have a legitimate emergency and there wasn't anything they could have done. We might as well have been stuck in a plane in the middle of nowhere miles from civilization, and we were only about 500 yards from the terminal. There were planes in front of and behind us on the taxiway. None of the Ground crews could get to the airport so there wasn't anyone to move planes and they didn't have equipment that could tow them through over 14 inches of snow. It was a series of bad situations that all came together.

You can google it and read some of the stories. It was only NWA as all the other airlines had cancelled their flights for the evening due to the forecasted storm.
 
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