Not sure why we are assuming she was the one getting the chance. Sounds like she was giving him the chance to woo her again, and then he got awkward with it. You screwed up. Don't listen to the sunshine pumpers. Realize you screwed up and learn from your mistakes.

Pssssht. She had her chance, not about sunshine pumping. She should get over herself.

Had her chance at what? Sounds like OP was the one wanting it more.

She was the one asking to hang out again. The way I was reading it, it sounded like maybe he thought she had some regrets from the past.

Right, she was trying to see if she could be interested in OP. She found out tonight that she wasn't...again. She was giving him the chance to demonstrate value and he failed.

So? I really don't see the problem. When he is old and by himself, maybe that's a time to reflect as something trivial as this. Right now, hell no.

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I have only broken through the friend zone once, and it was just for 4 months

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Breaking out of the friendzone

Gluck collin

sounds like she hadn't changed at all

sucks that nothing was gonna move forward between the two of you, but it sounds like you handled yourself well OP

that is, if one can wrap their mind around the idea that not getting laid =/= failure

Pretty sure I gave her the chance. She's the one that asked me out. Personally, I don't think I failed anything. I gave her the chance to see me again. That's what she wanted. I said my peace to her and if that's not what she wants right now, fine. I'm not going to start hanging out with her again regularly like I used to. That would just be stupid on my part.

Good for you. Best to move on to the next

Keep telling yourself that if it makes you feel better, but the truth is, before you met tonight she was interested...now she's not. Might as well just rule 1 the girl.

Everyone rule 1 the last piece of wool they pulled. Then everyone can feel better about themselves and the game they run.

for NYDA



[This message has been edited by mid90 (edited 6/27/2014 12:00a).]

Mid90- Blue Star for you

NYDA- Obviously in your eyes I've failed. But I said what I wanted to, so I'm good with that. But please, enlighten us. Tell us wtf you would've done differently.

I already told you

Rule 1 on NYDA. You are very sure of yourself. Let's see what you're working with.

Ah, yes... The ol' take the drunk girl home and bang her approach. Forgive me, but I consider that technique to be a tad beneath me and my moral compass.

Lol, ok

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Ok, going to radio silence. Will provide update when over. If I'm lucky, that won't be until tomorrow morning.

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Didn't mention anything about getting her drunk to sleep with her... Not everyone has to get a girl drunk to get her into bed ya know. I understand this may seem contradictory to your normal practices, but I'd venture to guess others would agree with me.

Oh, so just slightly tipsy is at the level of your moral compass, gotcha.

C'mon man. I don't understand why it even matters this much. if he poozed out, fine... If he truly arrived at that decision, fantastic...

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Pretty sure I gave her the chance. She's the one that asked me out.

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If you get another chance at this, purposely dont reply for a few days. She knows you're interested, but make sure she knows you're not THAT interested. Make her earn it, you'll become more attractive because of it.

If she doesnt call back, sorry dude. There are plenty of others out there and you dont have to sacrifice your ideals for em. Good luck!

You shouldn't have asked her if their may be something between you two. Terrible. Just hang out. Keep getting her drunk. That was pretty bad.

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Not everyone has to get a girl drunk to get her into bed ya know.

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You're such a great friend.

Honestly I feel OP did the right thing. Being upfront with someone (well me) is a lot better than playing a game. Just my opinion though. I'm a chick so what do I know?

Yes. You are a chick. Doomed no matter your actions. Play it cool and aloof...you are a snooty prude *****. Care at all, and you are needy and BSC. Can't win anyway, bc men.

Jesus H. Christ. I told you that were overthinking it 2 days ago and here we are...2 days later and still overthinking it. Why bring up anything about y'all's past this evening? Also, if you're gonna do that, it should have been all small talk until at least drink 4 for her.

Anyways, you brought up old **** and had a chance to recover but kept talking about old ****. You ****ed up big time right there. Had a chance to recover but just vomited all over yourself. She didn't meet up with you to rekindle flames that never were. She was into the new you. And you brought up old ****. That could have waited several weeks or months...after you had put the hooks in her with the sweet meat. Instead, 2 drinks in you went for the tear jerker about how she broke your fat heart 3 years ago.

Troll...has to be.

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Yes. You are a chick. Doomed no matter your actions. Play it cool and aloof...you are a snooty prude *****. Care at all, and you are needy and BSC. Can't win anyway, bc men.

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Yes. You are a chick. Doomed no matter your actions. Play it cool and aloof...you are a snooty prude *****. Care at all, and you are needy and BSC. Can't win anyway, bc men.

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I wish a girl would care and be needy

You say that now bba, but as soon as one does....new thread..."Why are white women so bsc?"

Oh you will, bba. Chicks dig bouncers. Soon some fiesty lass will be blowin up your phone with "how are you? How is work? Want to see me naked?"

I didn't bring up any old **** or mention crap about her breaking my heart. Where in the hell did I bring up any old crap? The only thing "old" that I mentioned was that I'm not a shoulder to cry on and that was after her whole "I don't know what I want." I just made it known not to try to use me like she used to because it won't happen.

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I didn't bring up any old **** or mention crap about her breaking my heart. Where in the hell did I bring up any old crap? The only thing "old" that I mentioned was that I'm not a shoulder to cry on and that was after her whole "I don't know what I want." I just made it known not to try to use me like she used to because it won't happen.

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The part where she was on drink 2 and you decided to be a tad more blunt.

You asked if she was seeing anyone? She's sitting across a cocktail table from you at 9:30pm on a Thursday night. Probably not.