Thanksgiving is my favorite holiday and this appears to be the first year we won't have any additional family around. Sounds like my SIL has unilaterally decided having a gathering is out, my MIL and FIL live with them, wife and I are both pissed. She seemed to have overwhelming concerns about COVID once my wife indicated she wanted to host this year. Hasn't impacted her own life or anyone else in the house much, but Thanksgiving is of great concern.

So my wife, my daughter, and I will just have our own thanksgiving. At least this year we can have whatever we want.

Current menu:
Cornbread dressing stuffed chicken from Hebert's (shipped from Houston)
Potatoes of some kind
Corn pudding
Roasted broccoli, asparagus, or Brussels sprouts

Pecan pie

Hopefully most of you can enjoy a normal thanksgiving, we're just trying to make it through.

Normally we fry a turkey but due to covid we are smoking one.


Jk about the covid thing. Excited to smoke one for the first time though.

Host it anyway, extend the invite to them and make them so no. Invite others who arent compromised and don't live in fear. Remind them that tomorrow is not promised.

My SIL did the same, but we said we are hosting anyways, and you are welcome to come but either way we are hosting. My family will all be here including my grandparents who refuse to live their few remaining years cowering in fear. My in-laws will likely come and we will try to hide it from the SIL at least until after it's over.

We will social distance, have plenty of sanitizer, encourage hand washing and tell anyone with a fever or symptoms to stay home.

We're going to Perry's.

We did a nice restaurant for Christmas a few years ago and it was great

We've hosted Thanksgiving for our extended families for going on 20 years. MZ R's mom did it for years before but when she got up in age I asked her if she wanted us to take over. Bless her heart, she said "I thought you'd never ask." We usually have anywhere from 35 to 45 folks. Babies to parents to grandparents and 2 great grandparents (me and MZ R),brothers, cousins, nieces, nephews, inlaws and outlaws. I think the max was 48 back when my folks and Mz R's folks were still alive. We now have 2 or 3 older folks that are in pretty bad shape w/o the china flu so TG was called off this year. It was a lot of work and a lot of fun and camaraderie but it was decided it wasn't worth the taking chance of one of our compromised being affected. We always baked a turkey and fried 2 more and made the mashed potatoes and gravy. Everybody else brought sides , deserts. #1 daughter of Rattler was assigned the olives way back when but she now has covid she caught from one of her students...

Going to be a weird/rough thanksgiving for us as well. Still don't know what we're going to do. My mom has always been a big holiday person, especially going all out on the lunches/dinners. She past away this year.

My dad is saying he's just going to disappear to the fishing cabin. My sister thinks she'll lose it just seeing a turkey. My wife is 8+ months pregnant so we can't travel. Not sure what we're going to do.

The lack of holidays will hopefully be the nail in the coronavirus coffin. The holiday season is a special time most folks look forward to all year and if they can't see their families what do they have to look forward to.

My dad passed away at the end of September so this will be our first major holiday without him. He made the turkey every single year. My brother and SIL are hosting this year. We will have the usual turkey and sides. I prefer steak for thanksgiving but I'll be doing that on Friday instead.

Thoughts and prayers for you and your family, it's going to be a tough one

htxag09 said:

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Going to be a weird/rough thanksgiving for us as well. Still don't know what we're going to do. My mom has always been a big holiday person, especially going all out on the lunches/dinners. She past away this year.

My dad is saying he's just going to disappear to the fishing cabin. My sister thinks she'll lose it just seeing a turkey. My wife is 8+ months pregnant so we can't travel. Not sure what we're going to do.

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Do what we do every year, stay home, watch football, and cook steaks.

We unexpectedly lost my sister at age 44 in August of 2019, in September of 2019 my Dad had a major stroke and lost the ability to swallow. My Mom was scared about bringing him around during Christmas because she didn't want him to catch the flu as it would likely kill him in his current state and kill him. Glad he decided to risk it, he died of complications from his stroke in February. I got to spend some good time with him over Christmas.

Point being, between my Dad and my sister you never know when death is coming for you. Spend all the time you can with each other.

This fear mongering around the holidays really pisses me off. If people were dropping dead in the streets and they were having to have mass burials/cremations you wouldn't have to force people not to gather. Don't live in fear, just live.

Truth. You don't get this year that we've taken off tacked on to the end of your life. It's gone forever.

I think it was a thread somewhere on Texags where someone asked how they handled the holidays with one of the in-laws dealing with a major cancer diagnosis. Someone else was in a similar situation. They decided to celebrate the major holidays with that parent because it was potentially their last. One of the parents on the other side passed away suddenly before the next set of holidays. Nothing is guaranteed.

On a lighter note, I might fry a turkey for the first time. Maybe try my hand at a pecan pie too.

Derail in place. But everybody's different. A cancer diagnosis doesn't mean a death sentence. That person may have 10, 20, 30+ years left. Yet covid could be deadly for them.

I'm not going to judge anyone who does a virtual holiday for these reasons.

And this is coming from someone who's mom passed away this past may from cancer. And I "lost" February and March with her because of covid and helping keep her "safe".

htxag09 said:

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Derail in place. But everybody's different. A cancer diagnosis doesn't mean a death sentence. That person may have 10, 20, 30+ years left. Yet covid could be deadly for them.

I'm not going to judge anyone who does a virtual holiday for these reasons.

And this is coming from someone who's mom passed away this past may from cancer. And I "lost" February and March with her because of covid and helping keep her "safe".

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yep. just because some people gambled and won, doesn't mean they didn't gamble. if you get together with family that is vulnerable, you are gambling. that's not to say you shouldn't do it if everyone is fine with it, but also don't give someone grief if they choose not to.

For sure, let the people who are at risk make their own choices on gambling. Everyone can look at the data and make a choice for what's right for them. Those of us at no risk (most of us) shouldn't make decisions for others, in my instance SIL didn't get to cancel FIL and MIL plans because she didn't like the risk. All risk of Covid can be mitigated, how far you want to take it depends on your risk tolerance, which should be your choice to make.

A few mitigators we will use

1. Dining outside with some distance
2. Food prep done with gloves
3. Food served by me with a mask
4. Separate entrance and bathroom for the compromised
5. Hand sanitizer on every table
6. Request that everyone takes their temps, stays home if feeling the slighted bit ill

Sorry to hear others are struggling as well. It just hurts more because my family is back in Texas, annual trip back was also derailed due to unexpected circumstances. 2020 is the first year I won't step foot in Texas. My wife's family is just down the road and we are wasting an opportunity to get together due to fear mongering. My FIL is 80, MIL is 70, both of my parents are 70. Who knows how much longer anyone has these days? Thanksgiving is supposed to be the time when everyone comes together, but everyone is just fracturing. We can't just live in fear, pretty sure my FIL is sick of this. Instead of having a meal with his 4 kids, 3 grandkids and extended families he'll be at home with the same people eating the same food. My daughter loves her grandparents so much, and they love her too, this isn't how it's supposed to be. I hope he says to hell with this and just comes over.

Let them know they are welcome at your place and that you will be taking precautions. They are adults who can make their own decisions

My father, 67, passed away at suddenly and unexpectedly in February. I'm thankful we had the Holidays with him last year. We're scaling back this year with my in-laws only because our families our trying to reduce the stress on everyone since many of my wife's family work in the medical fields.
I'll probably smoke a turkey breast instead of a whole (spatchcocked) bird and sides will be assigned; more of a potluck style this year.