What is a point of shame from your service?

10,920 Views | 38 Replies | Last: 1 yr ago by CenterHillAg
Eliminatus
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Can be lighthearted or not of course.

I didn't realize mine until I had gotten out. I was a Marine and I never once wore dress blues. I never even owned a set. Nor did I ever once attend a Marine Corps Ball.

For some reason that bothers me now. Like I wasn't a real Marine or something without those.

Y'all?
OldArmyCT
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I came home from Vietnam. 53 men from my company did not. I'm not ashamed, more grateful, but I think about those guys every day.
aggiejim70
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Shame is not the right word, but it does play on my mind that my grandfather, my class of '50 dad, my son, and several uncles and cousins all went to war for this country, and I spent two long lonely years keeping Oklahoma safe for democracy.
The person that is not willing to fight and die, if need be, for his country has no right to life.

James Earl Rudder '32
January 31, 1945
stoneyjr78
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No shame except possibly that had I not had an argument with someone I barely knew, I may not have made the decision to serve. Just grateful for the opportunity.

Did make it to a Dining In and a Dining Out in the Army. Nice to see everyone all cleaned up. Mostly spent a lot of time in the field and motor pool and supply room training and checking stuff. Peacetime Army seemed to run on paper. Running, yes, that too.
hut-ho78
Ulysses90
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This bothers me a lot. The only reason that aviation training gets the proportion of funding that it does is because of how expensive the airframe is to replace. Ground vehicles and weapon systems, not so much.

https://taskandpurpose.com/opinion/marine-corps-aav-accident-preventable-opinion/

The two most dangerous places to ride are in a "legacy vehicle" that struggles to compete for funding for basic maintenance and a brand new prototype vehicle in operational testing that cannot be allowed to fail.

https://www.sfgate.com/news/article/Marine-Commander-Admits-Falsifying-Osprey-2961116.php
USAFAg
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nm

12thFan/Websider Since 2003
texan12
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Nothing more dangerous than a military contractor with a wild ass idea or having a chance to put a feather in their hat.

I've seen great ideas and technology that were easier and more beneficial to everyone get shot down by some ass clown due to pride/ego. It's really disgusting watching grown men/women accept this in action.

What's worse are those enlisted and officers who are held to a higher standard of conduct having to abide by the above ass clown's decisions.
stoneyjr78
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texan12 said:

Nothing more dangerous than a military contractor with a wild ass idea or having a chance to put a feather in their hat.

I've seen great ideas and technology that were easier and more beneficial to everyone get shot down by some ass clown due to pride/ego. It's really disgusting watching grown men/women accept this in action.

What's worse are those enlisted and officers who are held to a higher standard of conduct having to abide by the above ass clown's decisions.


I didn't work with military contractors until after active duty and I was in the army reserves. They were guys assigned to help run computer exercises. They were all retired army. I had four years active duty and another 18 in the reserves. One of the reservists I knew from active duty and the unit went to work for one of the military contractors in Afghanistan and was killed. He was sharp, really sharp. I was disappointed at the reports coming out of of the Middle East for the contracted support. Sounded like there was a failure to hire competent plumbers and electricians. Just because it was overseas shouldn't mean the government should forget all about International Building Code plus the Army has Technical Manuals on all of that. It really bothers me when soldiers get killed in training or avoidable accidents. We all signed up for the full commitment, the blank check with our lives. Those lives should not be wasted because someone wants to make a bigger profit.
hut-ho78
stoneyjr78
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We're you meaning to reply to Ulysses90?
hut-ho78
texan12
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I was. My bad!
stoneyjr78
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Buck Turgidson
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Eliminatus said:

Can be lighthearted or not of course.

I didn't realize mine until I had gotten out. I was a Marine and I never once wore dress blues. I never even owned a set. Nor did I ever once attend a Marine Corps Ball.

For some reason that bothers me now. Like I wasn't a real Marine or something without those.

Y'all?
Well I never was on active duty or deployed during a war. I was a reservist at the end of the cold war, so it was a narrow window without a war for the US to fight. So, I feel like Vietnam & Desert Storm Marines are more genuine Marines than me in a way. Still view my brief time in the USMCR as a key life experience.
terata
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nm
Human beings understand reason compassion and dignity. Predators understand strength.
MapGuy
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My shame is that I'm here and others aren't. I've dealt with that since I left Afghanistan in 2005. It is a never ending battle that I've fought everyday to push on from. Few years back lost the sight in my left eye and was mistakenly told I had MS, that was a long year before they said that was an incorrect diagnosis, not a good thing to tell a person already having a hard time finding a reason to keep going in life. Thank God I found my way back to God that year, because I found myself on numerous occasions close to pulling the trigger, finding my faith again saved me. My guilt came from how close I was to death but didn't die while others did. I was ashamed I was still here and they weren't. Funny how years go by and it gets forgotten, but tonight I was watching a show and the character newly back from Vietnam talks about looking to the stars to feel connected with home. I don't know why but it hit me like a brick wall, they weren't even tears of sadness totally, they were just uncontrollable, a mixture of sadness and happiness because my grandfathers both told me how they looked to the stars to feel connected to home and I remember many a clear night on top of a hesco barrier staring into the night. TLDR, I understand, just a little emotional tonight.
No Le Hace
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Keep hanging in there! Pulling for you !
Hey Nav
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How are you doing tonight, MapGuy?
Hey Nav
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To lighten things up a little...

I misused military assets.

There I was, flying across the Med the day after Thanksgiving, sometime in the late 80s, and the radios were quiet and we were headed to Italy or somewhere else out in the Med. (That part I just don't remember.)

I needed the score to the A&M/ tu game. So, it became a series of radio calls - UHF to Incirlik. No score result. HF patch to Hellinikon (Greece) then a patch to Phantom (Ramstein, Germany) then RAF Mildenhall in England, then Iceland, then Goose Bay in Canada, then a telephone patch to the ALCC at 21st AF at McGuire AFB in NJ. A controller called a radio station and got the score, and then it all went back the other direction until I got the score. My buddies. Somewhere in there I think the Navy guys at Keflavik got involved, so a tip of the cap to them, also. (They did do some life saving things on one trip across the pond, so maybe another thank you to the squids and coasties on that one.)


Edit:

Then there is the whole use of manpower to create our beer rationing opplans during Desert Storm - although we were already working 20 hours a day... I don't feel too guilty about that.
MapGuy
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I'm much better today, I don't know what it was about that scene but it brought back something I had long forgotten about my time in Afghanistan. I don't think the feeling of guilt will ever go away but ever since I found my way back to Church, I at least feel like I'm doing something worth being here today. A few years back I also got pretty involved in a group back in Florida, Florida4Warriors, that was formed to combat suicide among our ranks and while it was a fun way to help others, it did help others and in turn helped me. I don't live in Florida anymore but I'm still finding ways to help others thru other organizations and would eventually like to form a group here in Missouri similar to the one in Florida.
nortex97
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I left the service just before 9/11 happened, and didn't go back. Long story...but sort of embarrassed by that.
Get Off My Lawn
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Service shame? That my deployment exclusively served the strategic goal of getting Obama reelection.
stallion6
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texan12 said:

Nothing more dangerous than a military contractor with a wild ass idea or having a chance to put a feather in their hat.

I've seen great ideas and technology that were easier and more beneficial to everyone get shot down by some ass clown due to pride/ego. It's really disgusting watching grown men/women accept this in action.

What's worse are those enlisted and officers who are held to a higher standard of conduct having to abide by the above ass clown's decisions.
You obviously don't know much about military contracting if you think the USG does not have control.
Trench55
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Many of us suffer from survivors guilt. I lost a lot of friends in Vietnam. Some with whom I served over there and others who were friends at A&M. Two of the guys with whom I served I will always believe died in my place.
FightnFarmerUSMC
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I didn't get to go to any libo ports as a single man.
Red1
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I was medically retired from the army. I did not finish strong. I got a DD214 and a flag in a cardboard box. I got rid of most of my army stuff to include my collection of coins.
Green2Maroon
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You were enlisted first and then went to A&M and commissioned, right? Didn't you also finish your career as a major? That's far from a bad deal.
Ryan the Temp
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I punched out of the Air Force Academy. I often wonder what could have been if I had made a different choice.
94chem
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I got a full ride AFROTC scholarship to A&M and turned it down. The Air Force insisted on coming to my HS and presenting it to me on awards day anyway. It was embarrassing. They should've just thrown a pizza party for anybody who was enlisting.
94chem,
That, sir, was the greatest post in the history of TexAgs. I salute you. -- Dough
JABQ04
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I wasted my Army ROTC scholarship and never commissioned. Ended up enlisting to pay it back. Really wish I had seen that through, but on the flip side probably wouldn't have gotten as serious with my wife as I would have back then and then wouldn't have the three of wonderful children I have now so it's all good
Teslag
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When I first joined there was a soldier who was kind of promiscuous but not what you would call easy or anything. She later suffered a sexual assault by a superior officer and it was buried. I had some information that backed up her case and I kept quiet just to avoid being caught up in it. This was prior to the Army's big anti-sexual assault push we see now. They basically forced her out and trashed her reputation. I found out last year that she eventually took her own life over it all. I've since volunteered for any SHARP teaching or SARC position I can but there's still a ton of guilt over it.
OldArmyCT
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Teslag said:

When I first joined there was a soldier who was kind of promiscuous but not what you would call easy or anything. She later suffered a sexual assault by a superior officer and it was buried. I had some information that backed up her case and I kept quiet just to avoid being caught up in it. This was prior to the Army's big anti-sexual assault push we see now. They basically forced her out and trashed her reputation. I found out last year that she eventually took her own life over it all. I've since volunteered for any SHARP teaching or SARC position I can but there's still a ton of guilt over it.
Wow.
stbabs
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Not shame at all, just an occasional twinge of "why me", or more accurately "why not me?"
Call came down for 3 Lts to get to the DMZ to spot for naval gunfire during the 72 offensive. I, and 2 other Lts report to the Bn XO. He says, "we only need 2, you and you (I'm one of the two)"
Next day, two of us back with the XO. He says, "one of you leaving tomorrow". Turns to me, says, "you're the battery XO, you're staying here, so Dave, grab your gear.

Dave died at the DMZ during a rocket attack. I'm alive 50 years later.

I get off a helo in Saudi Arabia, having decided to ride back to my pos with my sgtmaj. I wave to the air crew and say "thanks for the ride" then hop in the HMMWV with my sgtmaj. Helo takes off again. I got a radio call 15 minutes later. The helo I'd just gotten off of had crashed killing all aboard.

Glad to be alive? Absolutely! Just wish Dave and that air crew were too.
Strong Men Armed
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The Camp Lejeune contaminated water fiasco… they knew it was contaminated in 1982 and didn't move to stop it for five years. Wife and I were there from 1976-1978, in base housing. Her first pregnancy ended with an ectopic pregnancy in 1976. Now she is on kidney dialysis. Of course, the USMC lawyered up and played the waiting game, until plenty of folks died and couldn't get justice. How is that for Semper Fidelis.
BigJim49 AustinNowDallas
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Navy S2/c 45-46, USAF 1st Lt 54-56. Twice overseas One picture with a class I attended. Nothing to

show for 3 years to family!
Ulysses90
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So true. My local Marine Corps League detachment Commandant was at CLNC in 1977-79. He beat bladder cancer 11 years ago. He learned last month that it's back and in his hip bone. I heard the news a few months ago that an Army officer I knew who had spent a portion of his childhood living at Tarawa Terrace in the 1970s passed away at the age of 57. I had not seen him in years but I knew that he had lost a sibling to a cancer that was presumed to be related to the water contamination there.
CT'97
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While in Afghanistan I did a 15-6 into a medic who was stealing sleep meds.
Initially the command thinks he's selling them to locals or other countries solders on the fob. Doesn't add up as sleep meds are pretty easy to get, but I call JAG and start the interviews. The kids Plt Sgt says he's had issues with hard drugs in the past and is smart so if there is a way to abuse these things he thinks he'd find a way. So I ask a doctor and get it confirmed, you can abuse certain sleep meds and get a hallucinogenic high out of it. The doc thinks it's possible that's what the kid is doing and it's supported by some interviews with soldiers sleeping in the same bay as the medics.
My recommendation is that the kid gets sent to an inpatient rehab in Germany that would return him in country in time for us to redeploy and hopefully get this kids started back in the right direction when we get home.

Commander doesn't believe that the meds can be abused because he's never heard of that and thinks I didn't do a good enough investigation into the possible sales. I felt I had and there was no evidence of it and nowhere else to go with that. Commander decides to dock the kid a stripe, take away his access to the drugs and keep him in country and on duty.

Three months after we got home the kid died from a heroin OD. The Plt Sgt called and told me it all came out from a couple of his buddies after his death and I had been right and when he got home the kid went straight to the hard stuff.

I'll always wonder if I should have pushed back on that commander or done something more for that kid.


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