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Enjoying one's wealth as one gets older

26,859 Views | 205 Replies | Last: 2 days ago by Agilaw
infinity ag
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We are all very focused in generating wealth all the time. So much so that we frequently forget about enjoying it. I was talking to a friend of mine who is close to 60 and he told me this.

There are 3 parameters - Time, Health and Money

  • When you are young, you have time and health but no money.
  • When you are middle aged, you have money and health but no time.
  • When you are old, you have time and money but no health.

There is a period from ages 55 to about 70 when you are most likely to have all three - time, money and health. That is the time to spend on enjoyable pursuits like traveling, relaxing and other hobbies if possible and not chained to one's desk.

Now not everyone can do this and this triangle period is longer or shorter for each person.

Just thought I'd share this way of looking at things. As I near this period, I hope to use it in the best way possible rather than just by working in a corporate job.

Any thoughts on this or any other ways of thinking about it?
Dr T and the Women
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AG
Your friend is basically quoting Bill Perkins who wrote "Die with Zero"


Good easy read


I needed to see that.. was only grinding and not enjoying
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SW AG80
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AG
You and your friend are very spot on. In the early 1990s I was making more money than I should have been for a guy in my early 30s. My financial planner, who did me a really good job and was a good guy, sat down with me one day and told me I was more focused on saving for retirement than any of his other clients had ever been. He convinced me that I needed to enjoy the journey much more than I was.

I took his advise and did better.

Now my wife and I are both retired. 67&66 years of age. In good shape financially and pretty healthy. BUT we are now caring for my wife's 95 year old father. I had always heard it is harder on the care givers. But I never imagined it would be this hard nor life changing.

So what should be our truly golden years are spent doing things I never imagined. I know many people of my generation are going through the same situation. Just never know what life will throw at you.

Guess this was more of a rant. Sorry.
LMCane
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infinity ag said:

We are all very focused in generating wealth all the time. So much so that we frequently forget about enjoying it. I was talking to a friend of mine who is close to 60 and he told me this.

There are 3 parameters - Time, Health and Money

  • When you are young, you have time and health but no money.
  • When you are middle aged, you have money and health but no time.
  • When you are old, you have time and money but no health.

There is a period from ages 55 to about 70 when you are most likely to have all three - time, money and health. That is the time to spend on enjoyable pursuits like traveling, relaxing and other hobbies if possible and not chained to one's desk.

Now not everyone can do this and this triangle period is longer or shorter for each person.

Just thought I'd share this way of looking at things. As I near this period, I hope to use it in the best way possible rather than just by working in a corporate job.

Any thoughts on this or any other ways of thinking about it?

and this is why I have told my company I am retiring July 2026 at age 55

and going to Europe for 4 or 5 months

then down to Florida, Scottsdale, or southern california (if there is a cool job near the beach)
LMCane
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SW AG80 said:

You and your friend are very spot on. In the early 1990s I was making more money than I should have been for a guy in my early 30s. My financial planner, who did me a really good job and was a good guy, sat down with me one day and told me I was more focused on saving for retirement than any of his other clients had ever been. He convinced me that I needed to enjoy the journey much more than I was.

I took his advise and did better.

Now my wife and I are both retired. 67&66 years of age. In good shape financially and pretty healthy. BUT we are now caring for my wife's 95 year old father. I had always heard it is harder on the care givers. But I never imagined it would be this hard nor life changing.

So what should be our truly golden years are spent doing things I never imagined. I know many people of my generation are going through the same situation. Just never know what life will throw at you.

Guess this was more of a rant. Sorry.

now think about the fact you are better off than 85% of people your age who have no money and are dependent on social security and handouts.

and have kids with drug problems like most of West Virginia
EclipseAg
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AG
Yep.

Feeling pressure from two sides now -- saving as much as possible, but doing some things we've always wanted to do, like travel.
LMCane
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EclipseAg said:

Yep.

Feeling pressure from two sides now -- saving as much as possible, but doing some things we've always wanted to do, like travel.
my parents are 80 and 75 and still traveling

but I would recommend to do it as soon as you can
RightWingConspirator
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AG
I always feel like I never have enough. Would be curious to hear from those of you who retired, when was enough? We have reached the magical 7 figures about ten years back so we have that plus a couple more. Is this enough? I'm Type 1 diabetic and in pretty good shape considering I've had it since I was 11. I'm now 51. Wife is 46. One kid is off and married and I have a sixteen and a young thirteen year old still at home.

My job pays me well enough to have my wife stay at home as she chooses, but keep thinking of what "five more years" can do for my retirement accounts.
"But it is easier to purchase products that denote superiority than to be actually superior in economic achievement." - Thomas J. Stanley
MAS444
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AG
Good thread and some good anecdotal experience from SW AG80. I think of these things all the time and try to figure out where that ideal intersection of the three variables is.
Tumble Weed
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When I was 31 I decided to enjoy life along the way. Used to take an international vacation every year. Some years I took several big vacations. Now I don't feel the need to travel to exotic destination again. I care more about visiting and spending time with family than I do about seeing new sights.

My wife and I enjoy physical pursuits while we still have our health. Right now it is riding horses. My advice is to find something locally that you really enjoy that you can do nearly every day.

And since this is the "investing" board, invest your time in family and friends. The only thing that we get to keep are the memories.

ETA: I am currently 48. The only reason I sell my time to my employer is for the health insurance. My goal is to retire at 55.
infinity ag
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SW AG80 said:

You and your friend are very spot on. In the early 1990s I was making more money than I should have been for a guy in my early 30s. My financial planner, who did me a really good job and was a good guy, sat down with me one day and told me I was more focused on saving for retirement than any of his other clients had ever been. He convinced me that I needed to enjoy the journey much more than I was.

I took his advise and did better.

Now my wife and I are both retired. 67&66 years of age. In good shape financially and pretty healthy. BUT we are now caring for my wife's 95 year old father. I had always heard it is harder on the care givers. But I never imagined it would be this hard nor life changing.

So what should be our truly golden years are spent doing things I never imagined. I know many people of my generation are going through the same situation. Just never know what life will throw at you.

Guess this was more of a rant. Sorry.

That's some good insight here, I hadn't thought about that. I am guilty of the same thing, of being too focused on retirement and kid's college and debt freedom that I neglected enjoying the journey. But then grass is always greener, it is great to be debt-free with a good amount saved up. I am beginning to absolutely hate the tech industry these days. I am 10 years away from retirement but I feel like just quitting and doing other things with the 30 odd years I have left.
SW AG80
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AG
To get out of the heat for a few days and to just get away, on a whim we flew to San Diego for a few cool days last week. A short direct flight from San Antonio so easy to get there and easy to get back from in case of an emergency. We talked one day as we were walking around downtown San Diego how nice it is to be in good shape financially so we can do things on a whim and not worry about the cost.

Because we have been so tethered to San Antonio the last few years we have not spent much money traveling. We have had season FB tickets for almost 30 years. Last year the only game we made was the Alabama game. A big part of that was my wife had a serious health issue she was diagnosed with last year right at this time.

Our time will come to hit the airways again. And all that saving and worrying will once again pay off.
jja79
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AG
By the standards of this board I'm probably not wealthy but I pulled the plug on my career earlier this year. I'm 67 and might have continued to work but my industry isn't fun anymore. I am not suggesting anyone follow my path. I gave away all my personal property, packed what would fit in my Kia Telluride and moved 1,200 miles away to a place I didn't know one person. I knew I was moving to where I want to be and quickly found I out I had found the right people. I know people that are so focused on having everything within their control and every I dotted and T crossed and their stress level is through the roof as the time approaches.

Again I'm not suggesting anyone else follow my plan.
SW AG80
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AG
Sounds like you are doing well.
How is the Golden Tor? Still hanging around?

And I am a little envious you did this!
jja79
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AG
Still hanging around. Glad to hear you were able to make the San Diego trip.
EliteZags
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AG
already living on the beach but otherwise frugally enough to be sustained by 4% SWR, just need a couple more years of this market run(unlikely I know) while furiously investing 60%+ of take home, and/or a fat buyout then pulling the plug to be able to aggressively travel while still relatively young/single
maybe try to mostly live off portfolio overwriting/some trading to preserve principal
still have this need to get around to reading https://www.amazon.com/Earn-Income-Your-Index-Investments/dp/0578339633 anyone have experience with that strategy
OldArmyCT
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AG
I'm 77+ and taking a WWII trip to London, Paris & Normandy in September, and we travel a lot. On the downside <1 year after I retired my wife died 2 weeks after knee surgery of an embolism and I do my traveling with a girl from my HS. Money is not a problem but the curves life throws at you as you get older for darn sure is.
cgh1999
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AG
A few years ago, someone pointed out to me that I was the only person who found joy in watching my net worth grow. My family didn't care. My son tells me what's the point of having "lots" of money if you don't spend it.

On the other hand, my wife is fighting cancer right now and my job is stressful…and I'm able to manage because finances aren't a concern. Bills are rapidly approaching $1MM (pre insurance) and if I had to pay all of them out of pocket, I could figure that out.

Her fight has given me a much clearer perspective. I will continue to do my job…but it is 100% secondary to quality time with the family.
infinity ag
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cgh1999 said:

A few years ago, someone pointed out to me that I was the only person who found joy in watching my net worth grow. My family didn't care. My son tells me what's the point of having "lots" of money if you don't spend it.

On the other hand, my wife is fighting cancer right now and my job is stressful…and I'm able to manage because finances aren't a concern. Bills are rapidly approaching $1MM (pre insurance) and if I had to pay all of them out of pocket, I could figure that out.

Her fight has given me a much clearer perspective. I will continue to do my job…but it is 100% secondary to quality time with the family.

Lots of good posts and insight from folks of different ages. Thanks for everyone's perspective.
I am at the stage where I watch my net worth grow and get thrilled about it. I have spent most of my life being risk averse because I felt I did not have enough money to take the risk in case it failed. We were single income for first 14 years of married life so it was incredibly stressful. Now with some good investments I feel comfortable with no debt and good net worth so my next thing is with about 30-35 years I have to live what do I want to do? I hate my current (new) job as it did not turn out the way I expected so I might just quit and look again. Moving to the West Coast for jobs (where the market and weather are better) is another. Traveling.
I had 2 goals - having enough to pay for my kids college without getting them into debt, and having a good house to live in at age 75. It looks like I am covered on both and 75 is a long way away.

I have not reached my "magic number" but then I wonder if I am overdoing it. No one of my age has retired so it feels weird to do it. Of course many of my age still haven't paid off their house debt and I don't want to talk about my finances to them.
ToddyHill
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AG
Quote:

Money is not a problem but the curves life throws at you as you get older for darn sure is.
So sorry for your loss CT.

When I was in my teens, my father used to say, "Son, if you've got your health you've got just about everything." I'd listen, but really didn't give it much thought. Now at 67, I've realized on more than one occasion that he was spot on.

I remember my early years at A&M when CB's were the rage. In CB slang, right now we're "in the rocking chair." But I know that could change any minute.
Strat
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LMCane said:



and this is why I have told my company I am retiring July 2026 at age 55

and going to Europe for 4 or 5 months

then down to Florida, Scottsdale, or southern california (if there is a cool job near the beach)
Any concern that giving your employer 2+ year notice will impact your compensation and work opportunities? I'm turning 55 in a couple of months and plan on retiring next year. I'm going to wait until I receive my bonus (50% is discretionary) and LTI grant (which will vest pro-rata since I'm 55) next March and then turn in my notice with my last day worked around July 1. I will be willing to work a little longer if they want me to but I expect a retention payment. I'm in a niche single incumbent role so I have some leverage.
Bob Knights Paper Hands
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I plan to give the notice roughly 9 months prior to retirement. That gives them time to plan but protects me as well.
Bob Knights Paper Hands
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One piece of advice I wish I would have been given when I was younger was to start saving in a 'pre-retirement' account. I've ended up with more than I'll need in retirement but not enough to stop working yet. The tax benefits are great, but I wish I would have started to do both earlier. I had buckets to save for house, my next car, emergency, etc., but no bucket for pre-retirement until I was well into my 40s.
I bleed maroon
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AG
Great point. I think this thread has illuminated several areas where we all may have blind spots in terms of savings or planning goals. So far, this thread has noted most important ones, including:

- Retiree health care expenses, including long term care
- Pre-retirement income needs, including bridging health care until Medicare kicks in
- Care for aging parents / other relatives
- Timing of desired travel (generally, earlier is better)
- Selection of retirement location (including tax impact)

People usually focus on investment accumulation targets, retirement income targets, and leaving an inheritance, so those are usually well-covered in a typical thought process. Any more major ones I missed above?
SW AG80
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AG
OldArmyCT said:

I'm 77+ and taking a WWII trip to London, Paris & Normandy in September, and we travel a lot. On the downside <1 year after I retired my wife died 2 weeks after knee surgery of an embolism and I do my traveling with a girl from my HS. Money is not a problem but the curves life throws at you as you get older for darn sure is.


You have a great trip planned. I'm sure you will really enjoy it. And it is so great you have found a long time friend to travel with you. Please give us a report on your return.

This is an interesting topic with lots of good insight.
Ghost of Bisbee
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AG
OldArmyCT said:

I'm 77+ and taking a WWII trip to London, Paris & Normandy in September, and we travel a lot. On the downside <1 year after I retired my wife died 2 weeks after knee surgery of an embolism and I do my traveling with a girl from my HS. Money is not a problem but the curves life throws at you as you get older for darn sure is.


Dammit. I hate this for you. One of my best friends just lost his spouse and she was young. That is probably my biggest fear in life.
htxag09
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AG
My wife and I definitely plan to spend a lot of our time in retirement traveling. But we aren't waiting until then to travel either. We're taking bucket list trips now.

One of my first mentors out of college saved all her money and had a long list of vacations to take when retiring. On her first trip to Europe, her legs swelled up so bad she couldn't leave the hotel for most of their trip. Don't know what being old is going to do to your body. If you want to see Rome, go now, may not be able to later.

My dad bought a travel trailer. Spends most his summers in Ruidoso. But takes it all over, Colorado, Florida Keys, Nashville, Gatlinburg, Notre Dame...just a few places I can remember him going in the last couple of years.
jja79
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AG
We have known each other a long time and I have admired your drive, focus and ability to evolve to changing conditions. I'm sure everyone that reads this thread will join me in saying a prayer on your family's behalf.

Congratulations on daughter #1 starting A&M. Our perspective changes over time and in response to real life. I look forward to catching up.
MAS444
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AG
Quote:

I'm sure everyone that reads this thread will join me in saying a prayer on your family's behalf.
+1 cgh1999

And damn jja79...do you know all of us old dudes on this thread?!?
jja79
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AG
Sounds like it doesn't it? You 2 guys aren't old though.

I'm headed to We-Ko-Pa to place some bets on week zero and Canadian Football. Text me if you've got any secret insight.
AgOutsideAustin
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AG
htxag09 said:

My wife and I definitely plan to spend a lot of our time in retirement traveling. But we aren't waiting until then to travel either. We're taking bucket list trips now.

One of my first mentors out of college saved all her money and had a long list of vacations to take when retiring. On her first trip to Europe, her legs swelled up so bad she couldn't leave the hotel for most of their trip. Don't know what being old is going to do to your body. If you want to see Rome, go now, may not be able to later.

My dad bought a travel trailer. Spends most his summers in Ruidoso. But takes it all over, Colorado, Florida Keys, Nashville, Gatlinburg, Notre Dame...just a few places I can remember him going in the last couple of years.


You and me are alike in that regard. My wife and I are doing some of our traveling now and not waiting until we say ok now I'm retired so let's go. That's still a couple of years off for me but you never know. We have family and friends with health issues and I tell my wife we are " going to go and do while we can go and do". Some trips are less expensive than others and not a true bucket list trip but a great time anyway. We just got back from Punta Cana for four days on the beach and I was telling my friends about it. They were saying yeah that's a real bucket list trip and I told them it costs $4,000 all in. These guys make six figures plus, have savings, and no health issues and I tell them they need to go and take their wives. But they never plan anything and I told them y'all have the money (they agreed) and they will look up one day, be retired, and there's going to be a long bucket list without much crossed off.
SF2004
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AG
Bob Knights Paper Hands said:

One piece of advice I wish I would have been given when I was younger was to start saving in a 'pre-retirement' account. I've ended up with more than I'll need in retirement but not enough to stop working yet. The tax benefits are great, but I wish I would have started to do both earlier. I had buckets to save for house, my next car, emergency, etc., but no bucket for pre-retirement until I was well into my 40s.
This... this this this

A lot of people go overboard on hiding from the tax man or they do nothing at all.

I wish someone would have explained that is you want to retire early then that gap has to come from pre-retirement savings.

Also, I feel people need to figure out when it is enough and not piss away their life working and calculating the Future Value of one vs two ply toilet paper.

Lastly using debt on somethings (like a swimming pool) provides a return on that interest paid in non-financial means. If paying some interests allows your children to enjoy a pool in their prime years then it might be worth it to some people. Be reasonable and thoughtful but waiting is always going to incur opportunity cost.
EliteZags
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AG
Bob Knights Paper Hands said:

One piece of advice I wish I would have been given when I was younger was to start saving in a 'pre-retirement' account. I've ended up with more than I'll need in retirement but not enough to stop working yet. The tax benefits are great, but I wish I would have started to do both earlier. I had buckets to save for house, my next car, emergency, etc., but no bucket for pre-retirement until I was well into my 40s.

Roth conversion ladder?



tho I max 401K each year and still have over half portfolio in taxable, have yet to work somewhere allowing the elusive megabackdoor roth which would have been $$$
ToddyHill
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AG
Quote:

until Medicare kicks in
I wasn't prepared for the cost of Medicare. I had assumed (incorrectly) your monthly Part B premium was the same for everyone. Much like prior to retirement when you health insurance premium at your employer was the same for everyone.

Not so in Medicare.

Your premiums could be 340% higher than others on the same plan. I was not aware your income from two years prior determines your monthly premium.

I feel for those who served in the military and expected Tri Care to stay the same. It didn't, and they too have to pay premiums that are adjusted based on income.

.

SW AG80
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AG
I had that same notion with MediCare. Boy was I in for a surprise.

But the coverage is good. What I can't believe is how little the Drs. are paid by Medicare.
 
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