to be Josh Hamilton's chaperone...you know...watch him to make sure he doesn't go drinking or taking drugs again?

Yes.

Did you forget a zero or two?

Do I get a daily dozen autographed baseballs and free admission to all games?

Figure: $75X12X162 = $146K

My wife probably wouldn't like it... but to get paid to watch baseball would be Ahhight...

DA...the value of the autographed baseballs would go down if it gets saturated...however...you still get to fly chartered and free kick ass dinners.

You didn't answer my question.

$20000

there's no mistake there

I figured $75 was a saturated price.

I saw some on ebay for $100, and was going to go $50... but figured at least some of them would go full $100.

$20K for a year's worth of no alcohol or partying? What ****ing moron would agree to that?

I'd just want the stories to tell for the rest of my life.

Hambone wouldn't happen to have a 401k matching plan would he?

That means you can't drink either. Not enough zeros in that salary.

quote:

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I'd just want the stories to tell for the rest of my life.

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What kind of stories could you tell? "Big win tonight. The team went out to a titty bar & got hammered to celebrate. Josh & I went back to the hotel, sipped on some ginger ale, and played Scrabble until the wee hours of the morning. Damn, what a life."

Not for $20k, no...but I would enjoy the going back to the hotel and playing scrabble life. Double that and we are talking.

$20K, are they paying my room and board as well as insurance?

If not hell no. I couldn't even pay my mortgage with that.

quote:

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What kind of stories could you tell? "Big win tonight. The team went out to a titty bar & got hammered to celebrate. Josh & I went back to the hotel, sipped on some ginger ale, and played Scrabble until the wee hours of the morning. Damn, what a life."

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You seriously underestimate my addiction to Words with Friends. But still, change the game to Guess Who and I'd sign right now.

Plus I'm assuming I'd get to go to all the ball games both at home and on the road. That would be incredible. I've also had experience plannnig good times without alcohol because I was the social director of Iron Spikes for two years when we were still sponsored by the athletic department. As long as Josh likes water slides, bingo, and doesn't mind a Toto song or two I'd say we're a perfect match.

Mind you that water slide is in 45 degree weather.

Aww heck... sign me up. I am in. "I bless the rains down in Africa"

Another scenario...Hambone gives you 50 large to find hookers and blow...do you give in?

Yes.

This is a grown man and a father not a child.

Does one get health insurance?