and asks you for spare change, what is your standard response? Does it depend on the bum? On your mood?

Bum, answer is always "nope"

If it's someone that appears to just need help, car out of gas, broken down, flat, phone call, etc... I'll examine teh situation a little more.

don't have any cash... sorry

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If it's someone that appears to just need help, car out of gas, broken down, flat

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Uh, those are bums

"Sorry, don't have any cash/change on me." is my standard response. Doesn't matter when or where I rarely give anything to them.

I always try to be polite to them no matter the situation. There's always a couple that like to throw in a F-you or kiss my ass or something along those lines as they walk away. It's usually good for a laugh. There was a woman in Austin that asked me for change one time and I gave her the standard response. As she's walking away she starts yelling "it's me, it's me" over and over again. That was a little freaky.

[This message has been edited by Green Fairy (edited 6/11/2009 1:32p).]

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"Sorry, don't have any cash/change on me." is my standard response. Doesn't matter when or where I rarely give anything to them.

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+1

"All I have is plastic."

Usually shake my head "no" once they get eye contact with me and they move on...never had any go further than that...

I show them my Glock [pvsherwood]

So I'm walking up to the corner at Bell and Louisiana where a bum is standing and receiving some $ bills from a gentleman in a suit.

As I approach, the bum and I make eye contact but I look away to ignore him.
Bum: "You're not going to give me any money are you?"
Me: "Nope. It's my money."
Bum: "Well at least you're honest."
Me: "Yep"
Bum: "Have a nice day."
Me: "You too"
Bum: "Thanks"

true story


I never give bums money. I tried giving bums left over food and clothes but it's always been turned away. Their signs are misleading.

I normally don't make eye contact or respond.

I ask them as they approach if they want some change, of course they say yes, to which I reply 'Change comes from within my man'

i too have found that "anything helps" = "cash only"

Saw a couple of guys 2 weeks ago asking for gas to get home...while they were driving around in a V8 Chevy pickup burning what they already had.

I give nothing since giving encourages capacity restrictions on the area roadway network.

I'll leave you with a bum-sign stumper that I still can't figure out which meaning they were going for...

Saw a sign that read "GOBLESS". Nothing more, nothing less. Now, does this mean "JOBLESS" or did they leave out the D in "GOD BLESS"? I've gone both ways now for years as to the correct intention of that sign.

That is quite the conundrum.

I'm gonna go with "JOBLESS" as the intended meaning.

I say, "No, none of my change is spare"

I would almost bet that the sign was intentionally done like that so as to make me notice it (and possibly give something). If it were written JOBLESS or GOD BLESS, I wouldn't have ever noticed or cared.

So has anyone seen the usual bum at Beechnut and US 59? He's a white guy that is seen half the time in women's clothes and high heels. Dude is C.R.A.Z.Y. Certifiably, 100% in the loony bin. But he has this three-step trademarked charade down pat:

1) Makes an inch sign with his fore-finger and thumb (to signify "a little" )
2) Puts hand over heart (to signify "me" or "please" I guess)
3) Puts hand to mouth (to signify "to eat" )

This 3-step process makes him SERIOUS cash.

[This message has been edited by Anagrammatic Nudist (edited 6/11/2009 2:26p).]

I wish I had those coins from that SNL commercial sketch to give out. They said something like "not today friend" on one side and a middle finger on the other.

[This message has been edited by agcraigb (edited 6/11/2009 2:35p).]

A week or two ago one a hot and humid day I went to the walgreens by my place. There was a bum sitting outside. I bought him a giant water and two gatorades while inside. When I tried to give it to him he laughed and said 'buddy I've already had too much to drink today, got any money?' F bums.

You got change for a $100?

ask them what Google closed at.

New Army lives at Reed Arena

I always tell them I never carry cash, ever, but I will offer a bottle of water. I always keep a case in my truck.

One evening I was at the Exxon station at 45 & Scott Street and got approached by a bum. I gave him my standard line and he pressed, telling me he was hungry. I offered to buy him dinner. He said sure, and I bought him dinner from the Church's inside the Exxon. He was super excited, and after I finished paying for my gas I saw him up under the freeway eating his dinner and waving to me as I left.

That's the only time a panhandler ever accepted an offer of food from me.

Do you think he's gonna vote for you?

About a week after the election, I was walking downtown and saw a business man, dressed in a nice suit, walking and talking with this lady. A bum walks up to the man and asks "do you have any change?". The man, without hesitation, says "I don't have change, but don't worry sir, your president will take care of you."

I don't know if the bum even knew who the president was.

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If it's someone that appears to just need help, car out of gas, broken down, flat, phone call, etc... I'll examine teh situation a little more.

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I had a guy approach me at a gas station claiming that his car was broken down on the highway and his wife and kid with cancer were in the car. I offered to drive to the car and jump start it, but he said something about it would fry my car because of reverse polarity or something like that. I still said I would investigate, but he kept on trying to talk me out of going to the car and instead asked for money to pay the tow truck driver who was "just over there". I began to see what was up and quickly made a retreat. I'm willing to help out someone, but these jerks try to take advantage of me.

I give them $18 glasses of wine.

This happened just the other day by Shepard at a Vallero. Was walking to car from the store and saw a bum see me and start to approach. I quickly got in my car and started it, he came up to the window and said "excuse me", and i said "you're excused" and drove off.

"No thank you"

Started using it for the people that hand out things, and just moved over to all requests. It is polite, you can say it early as they approch and it confuses them while you move on.

try it.

racists

Similar stories:

@ Jack in the Box on Fannin and Wheeler as I'm walking up to the door:
Bum: Scuse me, sir - you got any change?
Me: Nope, only got my credit card.
Bum: Then can you buy me a hamburger?
Me: No, I can't.

Bum proceeds to glare at me as I walk past him into the place. Watches me the whole time as I place my order to go. Glares at me as I walk out the door, as I get into my car and as I drive away. He completely ignores the two or three other people that walk past him.

@ Specs downtown as I'm getting into my car, the bum walks up to me and before he even says anything:
Me: No, I don't have any cha...
Bum: Whatchou talkin' bout?! I was gonna askyou for no money! I wantedta know what time it iz...
Me: That's okay, I'm not wearing a watch...

He walks off stomping his feet...

They say beggars can't be choosers but they never said beggars can't be *****s...

The whole "what time is it", throws me for a loop. I remember lots of kids in mexico would come up to me asking that. I always figured they had something else going on.




[This message has been edited by Texaggie7nine (edited 6/11/2009 5:19p).]

GET LOST!! (not really)

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The whole "what time is it", throws me for a loop

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The only correct response is to that is "time for you to leave me alone ese'."