Long story short...

I received a job offer for a position that I didn't really want (lateral move), good salary (unemployed right now). Accepted position.

I then received a job offer for another position (promotion) (that I wanted) better salary...

How do I go about rejecting the 1st offer without burning that bridge?

Yea, because I wanted a backup in case I didn't get the second

Yea, I feel kinda bad but not really

It happens. As mentioned above, reach out and decline as respectfully and apologetically as you can. Likely cross off getting another offer from them for a decent period of time, but circumstances and hiring folks change, so not forever.

It happens every day. Smart people get over it.

In my experience, until the new hire shows up on Day 1 as planned, the position is still open. Even then, I hold my breath that they stay minimum of six months. This is in Austin and over a range of companies that are non-tech.

I had a new hire $27/hr and scheduled for start Monday morning. They sent me a text at 8pm Sunday night that they were taking another position. It was more money and same industry as previous experience. YMMV

My brother was in this situation a couple of years ago. Wound up sticking with the first offer. He did not think he would like it. Turned out to be the best job he has ever had. He has worked for probably 8 different companies over the years. He absolutely loves his job now. They treat him very well and it is also the smallest company he has ever worked for. There are only 10 employees spread out all over the south.

You have to take the better option. No question there. Timing sucks is all and chalk it up to that. If it does "burn a bridge", so be it.

But, it could be that they have a few qualified candidates in waiting as well. Look, be honest. They will understand and almost all of them would do the same thing as you if they were in your shoes. So, there's a very good chance that they won't hold it against you. These are different times. Hell, even if you actually started, if the other offer came and you'd been there for 2-3 weeks or so, you take the better offer. That might piss them off, but let's face it, you have a better opportunity. Again, honesty is the best policy

I had a friend take an offer and about a week or so after (she was still at her old job and had given her notice) another opportunity just to interview came up. It was potentially am better situation for her and her family given hours, location etc. So she took a chance and just told the placve that she took the offer from about it. They gladly let her interview and in the end, she went with the original offer and didn't take the other job. Her honesty was the key and really likes where she is working so obviously they never held it against her that she took the other interview. Again, these are people too and likely wopuld do the same if it benefits their family more.

Just had a similar issue with one of our new hires. He accepted another offer before ours came through. What I learned from this is that you can opt out of an offer right up until the start date for that particular offer. Not sure if this is common across the board but that is my experience. And yes, ours was the better offer!

Welp job 1 got rescinded and job decided not to keep the position anymore. So I'm eating major humble pie now

crane said:

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Welp job 1 got rescinded and job decided not to keep the position anymore. So I'm eating major humble pie now

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It happens. No humble pie... probably helps you reconsider the original question.

I was unemployed in 2009 for several months. Really bizarre endings to job opportunities.

Business is fickle and while you want to do the right thing... you've gotta look out for yourself.

Any advice on how not to get depressed

Rescinded before or after you backed out on them?

Ogre09 said:

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Rescinded before or after you backed out on them?

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I'm not following either....

You accepted job one and declined job 2?

Then job one rescinded the offer?

Job #2 decided that they were making internal "changes" and that the position was no longer needed.

Job #1 rescinded my offer

crane said:

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Job #2 decided that they were making internal "changes" and that the position was no longer needed.

Job #1 rescinded my offer

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Oh that sucks.

It happens.

Find your niche. You'll find it.

I am teaching again... after the following:

1. Was unhappy teaching. Was given a new class(es) every year, which made preparation difficult (it also made me very valuable - I have taught every math and science course our school offers in HS). I left for another job 3 days before school started. New job was crap... saw almost immediately. Thankfully, school took me back.

2. Almost a year ago, my wife's company recruited me for an open position (I was not looking) for more $$. I figured.. what the heck. After 7 months... too much stress (won't discuss why). School had an open position that they couldn't fill. They were happy to have me back. Thankfully, teaching position just got a 12% raise (which pay still the best). But, happy to have a job, even if it is MS (I'm a HS teacher).

Point - don't get discouraged. Make finding a job your job. Work your relationships. Those are what matter the most.