fc2112 said:
The absolutely meanest, nastiest bosses I've ever had were women.
My last boss in "corp world" was a lesbian in her mid 50's who was very open about her decades of substance abuse and "recovery". I was a VP and she was a very senior VP. In a reorg, I ended up having my entire department rolled up under her and she was my new boss.
She hated me from day one. We didn't know each other and my reputation was absolutely solid. My internal employee reviews of management were literally the best in the North America/Caribbean region. But she clearly hated me. About a month in, at about 3:00 AM she replied to an email I sent her in an incoherent rant that was full of lies, profanity, and utter BS. I replied first thing in the AM "we need to meet in person, I have absolutely no idea at all what you are talking about, but I have sincere concerns". I have no doubt she was sh** faced when she sent the email.
She didn't respond to me for days then finally sent the mea culpa response that she basically had a bad hair day, and if I would be so kind, please pretend the email was never sent. Sure. Over the course of the next few months I continued to run my department and she basically was a non existent boss.
Annual review came around and she keeps cancelling our 1:1, literally even when I travelled to meet her to have it. When we finally met she informed me that my bonus remained at standard pay out and I was not even getting a merit increase because my pay was already maxed out for that level. When I reminded her that I was still carrying the title and the job and she had not had HR adjust my job stage she just shrugged and said "well, I tried". Whatever. She avoided me for several months after that until I got her cornered at a conference and told her to fix this sh** or I resign. She then went in to denial mode for two months until I finally got HR to work with me on an exit strategy. **** didn't even have the balls to speak to me again and I stayed on in her organization for several more months before finally having HR pull the plug on me.
Ok, so here is the point of this word wall above. I post this only to offer unsolicited advice. When you know, really know, that you are an integral part of an organization, DO NOT FEAR LOSING YOUR JOB. Be patient, be mature, be strategic. Looking back on this I cost myself a good amount of money by not pushing back harder. By not playing being more vocal. This woman was clearly scared of me because I knew my sh** and my department and my people (who all had my back). I should have hung in longer, stressed her out more, and kept documenting every one of her F'ups. But I got tired, defeated, and done with it. I could have rode that gravy train another year at minimal effort. She had no answer for me other than to ignore me. Push back, be bold but smart, milk every dollar out of these big corp fu*** you can before you exit stage left. And then go work for a small company or start your own and manage the F out of your investments and enjoy your life.
Have a great weekend!