*****Official Funny Political Tweet Thread*****

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ravingfans
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In reply to Uncle Howdy • 8:25p, 7/29/22
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Geralt of Rivia said:


HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
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11:34p, 7/29/22
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notex
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https://babylonbee.com/news/government-declares-gay-orgies-an-essential-activity/

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ATLANTA, GA The CDC has updated its list of essential and non-essential activities during a pandemic or outbreak, adding "gay orgies" to the "essential" category.

The CDC officially moved "gay orgies" to the "essential" side of its guidelines for which activities you can still participate in during the spread of a virus, where it joined other activities like "going to dinner at the French Laundry" and "mostly peaceful riots."

"While going to church, work, and school will be forbidden the next time there is a massive outbreak, gay orgies will always be protected activities," said CDC Director Rochelle Walensky. "Certain things are sacred, constitutional rights that the government cannot forbid you from doing. Things like massive group sex with other gay people. This is what America is all about. It's worth the risk."

"It's your right - nay, your duty - to continue doing this important activity during the spread of a disease that's mostly spread by this activity," she added.

Democrat leaders say they are moving to amend the Constitution to include the right to gay orgies in the document, with many proposing the Second Amendment be replaced with the new one.
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Rexter
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8:15a, 7/30/22
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8:35a, 7/30/22
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annie88
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11:03a, 7/30/22
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Currently a happy listless vessel and deplorable. #FDEMS TRUMP 2024.
Fight Fight Fight.
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justcallmeharry
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11:48a, 7/30/22
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If you think I am a liberal, you are incorrect. Assume sarcasm on my part. Sorry if something I post has already been posted. Just the way it is!!
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Russ Dalrymple
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8:59p, 7/30/22
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Well, I'm terrible dealing with Instagram but this is funny…

https://www.instagram.com/reel/CgS6kB6p5zs/?igshid=MDJmNzVkMjY=
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TRM
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In reply to Russ Dalrymple • 9:01p, 7/30/22
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Russ Dalrymple said:


https://instagr.am/p/CgS6kB6p5zs
FIFY
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Russ Dalrymple
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In reply to TRM • 9:04p, 7/30/22
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Thanks
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justcallmeharry
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10:51a, 7/31/22
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If you think I am a liberal, you are incorrect. Assume sarcasm on my part. Sorry if something I post has already been posted. Just the way it is!!
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ravingfans
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11:04a, 7/31/22
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Lawyers should never ask a Georgia grandma a question if they aren't prepared for the answer.

In a trial, a Southern small-town prosecuting attorney called his first witness, a grandmotherly, elderly woman to the stand. He approached her and asked, 'Mrs. Jones, do you know me?' She responded, 'Why, yes, I do know you, Mr. Williams. I've known you since you were a boy, and frankly, you've been a big disappointment to me. You lie, you cheat on your wife, and you manipulate people and talk about them behind their backs. You think you're a big shot when you haven't the brains to realise you'll never amount to anything more than a two-bit paper pusher. Yes, I know you.'

The lawyer was stunned. Not knowing what else to do, he pointed across the room and asked, 'Mrs. Jones, do you know the defence attorney?'

She again replied, 'Why yes, I do. I've known Mr. Bradley since he was a youngster, too. He's lazy, bigoted, and he has a drinking problem. He can't build a normal relationship with anyone, and his law practice is one of the worst in the entire state. Not to mention he cheated on his wife with three different women. One of them was your wife. Yes, I know him.'

The defence attorney nearly died.

The judge asked both counsellors to approach the bench and, in a very quiet voice, said,
'If either of you idiots asks her if she knows me, I'll send you both to the electric chair.
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