Unusual baptism question

2,584 Views | 28 Replies | Last: 1 yr ago by TheGreatEscape
Mister Shipwreck
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This may sound like a strange question... But, I know when you get married by a pastor, you are expected to pay the pastor for his time. I see in advice column's all the time that many people don't seem to know to do this...

If an adult is getting baptized soon, is a similar thing expected?

I really have no idea, and don't want to break etiquette.
aggieband 83
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AG
My Dad was a Methodist pastor for over 40 Years.
He never charged or accepted a payment.
He always said it is a gift to the person being baptized.

Mister Shipwreck
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aggieband 83 said:

My Dad was a Methodist pastor for over 40 Years.
He never charged or accepted a payment.
He always said it is a gift to the person being baptized.


Ok, thanks for the answer.
TheBonifaceOption
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Baptism and Communion are sacraments (even for protestants). A pastor is not to receive a penny for the administration of these. Typically these two are done during the weekly worship gathering. (If you are having a private baptism, the pastor is a cult leader and this adult needs to run away.)

Funerals/weddings are completely different because 1) they aren't done in the confines of "sunday" worship, they are an extra duty you are requesting him to do, taking his time he would otherwise be with family or friends, 2) you typically customize the pastors speech to the event and people involved, 3) funerals and weddings typically require counseling (premarital) or consoling (emotionally draining.)
Bob Lee
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AG
TheBonifaceOption said:

Baptism and Communion are sacraments (even for protestants). A pastor is not to receive a penny for the administration of these. Typically these two are done during the weekly worship gathering. (If you are having a private baptism, the pastor is a cult leader and this adult needs to run away.)

Funerals/weddings are completely different because 1) they aren't done in the confines of "sunday" worship, they are an extra duty you are requesting him to do, taking his time he would otherwise be with family or friends, 2) you typically customize the pastors speech to the event and people involved, 3) funerals and weddings typically require counseling (premarital) or consoling (emotionally draining.)


What's wrong with private baptism?
Zobel
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AG
It varies. In the orthodox tradition baptisms are done separately from most church services, and it's common (but not required) to give the priest a small thank-you gift.
Howdy Dammit
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Zobel said:

It varies. In the orthodox tradition baptisms are done separately from most church services, and it's common (but not required) to give the priest a small thank-you gift.

Same in the Catholic world. Just went through it for the first time with our daughter. Priest got a small gift.
TheBonifaceOption
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Quote:

What's wrong with private baptism?

So much. Let's begin with history.

Moses was instructed to construct a bronze levar to place outside the Tabernacle. This was visible to all that the priesthood must be made clean prior to entering.

Next at the temple there was a similar scenario which was used for more washing of priests (ablution).



The levitical baptism, the same baptism John gave and Jesus received in the New Testament, is a priestly baptism done, like at the Tabernacle and the Temple, done publicly for all to witness.

Further all baptisms (NT and OT) observed in Scripture are all public for all to bear witness. The only time prior to age of "everyone can make up their own denomination" where baptisms were "private" is when the roman church allowed priests to baptize children immediately after birth because of bad pregnancies/deliveries. Otherwise even back then the norm was in front of the church for all to bear witness.

In fact, even here in America, baptism records because the sacrament is public acted as valid governmental records of citizens, birth certificate, evidence of name and inheritance etc. Because it was public, it verifiable by witnesses in the township.

....we can get into the theology of the rationale of public baptism. But if 4000 years of examples of its visibility isn't enough, it's gonna be a fruitless conversation.
craigernaught
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AG
I regularly received honorariums for weddings and funerals. I never received one for a baptism. Traditions vary, as is apparent in this thread. I would feel uncomfortable accepting one. If I received it I would probably have refused or donated it back to the church.

Weddings are a bit different in my experience. Baptisms occurred during the normal service. They require very little preparation beforehand that the pastor isn't already doing.

Weddings take up quite a bit of time. Rehearsals, counseling, planning, sermon and service prep, and the wedding service all happening outside of the typical pastoral work schedule.

You can always ask the pastor and/or offer to make a special donation to a ministry of the church if you would like.
Bob Lee
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TheBonifaceOption said:

Quote:

What's wrong with private baptism?

So much. Let's begin with history.

Moses was instructed to construct a bronze levar to place outside the Tabernacle. This was visible to all that the priesthood must be made clean prior to entering.

Next at the temple there was a similar scenario which was used for more washing of priests (ablution).



The levitical baptism, the same baptism John gave and Jesus received in the New Testament, is a priestly baptism done, like at the Tabernacle and the Temple, done publicly for all to witness.

Further all baptisms (NT and OT) observed in Scripture are all public for all to bear witness. The only time prior to age of "everyone can make up their own denomination" where baptisms were "private" is when the roman church allowed priests to baptize children immediately after birth because of bad pregnancies/deliveries. Otherwise even back then the norm was in front of the church for all to bear witness.

In fact, even here in America, baptism records because the sacrament is public acted as valid governmental records of citizens, birth certificate, evidence of name and inheritance etc. Because it was public, it verifiable by witnesses in the township.

....we can get into the theology of the rationale of public baptism. But if 4000 years of examples of its visibility isn't enough, it's gonna be a fruitless conversation.


We've asked for private baptisms for nearly all our children. Part of the reason is because availability is generally poor, and months out after they're born, and front office lady won't budge even after I show her canon law on when they're to be baptized in proximity to their birth. But also because I like the peace of mind of having a priest I know will perform the rite carefully and correctly and beautifully. Their godparents, both sets of grandparents, and other friends and family are all there. I can't tell in what sense you mean private, but very often it just means you're not one of 30 being baptized.
Mister Shipwreck
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Well, the pastor has given me the choice of doing it during the large service, or on a different day. Lately, they have shown videos of different baptisms during the service - baptisms done on other days. I decided I would rather do it that way.

So, it will not be done during the main service.

So, I am back to deciding what I should do about a gift, as there seems to be comments on both sides of the issue.

I don't want to insult him, but I suppose I should.
dermdoc
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AG
May I ask what kind of church/denomination this is?

I agree with what craigernaught posted above but I am a Baptist.

Baptism is different for Catholic and Orthodox and is more of a ceremony performed by the priest.
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Mister Shipwreck
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The Church of Christ
dermdoc
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Mister Shipwreck said:

The Church of Christ


No idea on that one.

Baptist and Methodist it is not routine to pay the pastor for a baptism.
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88Warrior
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Not sure why a pastor/preacher would consider excepting money for this….if it was me I would consider this a positive perk/honor of the position and validation of preaching the Good News…but that's just me…
dermdoc
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88Warrior said:

Not sure why a pastor/preacher would consider excepting money for this….if it was me I would consider this a positive perk/honor of the position and validation of preaching the Good News…but that's just me…


Agree.
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HDeathstar
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Catholic: Private Events: Funeral/Wedding usually give a gift to Cantor and priest or Deacon (usually deacons these days). Of course, they are invited to the reception as well. Usually, a special gift to Church as well.

Public Sacraments: Baptism, 1st Communion, Confirmation usually a special donation to the church. I usually donated to the youth formation for these.

Howdy Dammit
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88Warrior said:

Not sure why a pastor/preacher would consider excepting money for this….if it was me I would consider this a positive perk/honor of the position and validation of preaching the Good News…but that's just me…

Its purely voluntary, so I have no issue with it. It's honestly nice to have a reason to donate to a priest. They don't make much.
ABATTBQ87
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AG
Mister Shipwreck said:

The Church of Christ


I've been a member of the church of Christ for life, and was baptized in 1980.

The preacher requires no gift or payment for baptism.

He'll be happy with a hug or handshake
Mister Shipwreck
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Ok, thanks for the info
Sapper Redux
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TheBonifaceOption said:

Quote:

What's wrong with private baptism?

So much. Let's begin with history.

Moses was instructed to construct a bronze levar to place outside the Tabernacle. This was visible to all that the priesthood must be made clean prior to entering.

Next at the temple there was a similar scenario which was used for more washing of priests (ablution).



The levitical baptism, the same baptism John gave and Jesus received in the New Testament, is a priestly baptism done, like at the Tabernacle and the Temple, done publicly for all to witness.

Further all baptisms (NT and OT) observed in Scripture are all public for all to bear witness. The only time prior to age of "everyone can make up their own denomination" where baptisms were "private" is when the roman church allowed priests to baptize children immediately after birth because of bad pregnancies/deliveries. Otherwise even back then the norm was in front of the church for all to bear witness.

In fact, even here in America, baptism records because the sacrament is public acted as valid governmental records of citizens, birth certificate, evidence of name and inheritance etc. Because it was public, it verifiable by witnesses in the township.

....we can get into the theology of the rationale of public baptism. But if 4000 years of examples of its visibility isn't enough, it's gonna be a fruitless conversation.


Mikvahs have existed before Christianity and are private pools in Judaism for immersion for purity purposes. There's nothing in history that says every immersion must be public.
RebelE Infantry
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AG
Howdy Dammit said:

Zobel said:

It varies. In the orthodox tradition baptisms are done separately from most church services, and it's common (but not required) to give the priest a small thank-you gift.

Same in the Catholic world. Just went through it for the first time with our daughter. Priest got a small gift.


Correct. Requiring compensation for sacraments is simony and a very grave sin.

A token stipend to the priest is proper, however.
The flames of the Imperium burn brightly in the hearts of men repulsed by degenerate modernity. Souls aflame with love of goodness, truth, beauty, justice, and order.
TheBonifaceOption
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Sapper Redux said:

TheBonifaceOption said:

Quote:

What's wrong with private baptism?

So much. Let's begin with history.

Moses was instructed to construct a bronze levar to place outside the Tabernacle. This was visible to all that the priesthood must be made clean prior to entering.

Next at the temple there was a similar scenario which was used for more washing of priests (ablution).



The levitical baptism, the same baptism John gave and Jesus received in the New Testament, is a priestly baptism done, like at the Tabernacle and the Temple, done publicly for all to witness.

Further all baptisms (NT and OT) observed in Scripture are all public for all to bear witness. The only time prior to age of "everyone can make up their own denomination" where baptisms were "private" is when the roman church allowed priests to baptize children immediately after birth because of bad pregnancies/deliveries. Otherwise even back then the norm was in front of the church for all to bear witness.

In fact, even here in America, baptism records because the sacrament is public acted as valid governmental records of citizens, birth certificate, evidence of name and inheritance etc. Because it was public, it verifiable by witnesses in the township.

....we can get into the theology of the rationale of public baptism. But if 4000 years of examples of its visibility isn't enough, it's gonna be a fruitless conversation.


Mikvahs have existed before Christianity and are private pools in Judaism for immersion for purity purposes. There's nothing in history that says every immersion must be public.

Mikvehs are for women to purify after their period or childbirths. Thanks for comparing apples to washing machines, bud.
Sapper Redux
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That's one use. Hardly the only one.

https://www.jewishvirtuallibrary.org/mikveh
TheGreatEscape
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Baptism is an extension of grace. So just receive it.
aggiesherpa
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AG
Mister Shipwreck said:

The Church of Christ


CofCer here, I would not expect anyone to offer payment to the peacher just for a baptism. If you have been studying with the preacher for a long time during off hours or the evening, a show of appreciation would be considerate, but not expected.
Mister Shipwreck
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aggiesherpa said:

Mister Shipwreck said:

The Church of Christ


CofCer here, I would not expect anyone to offer payment to the peacher just for a baptism. If you have been studying with the preacher for a long time during off hours or the evening, a show of appreciation would be considerate, but not expected.
OK, thanks.
mikes0108@icloud.com
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Amen
TheGreatEscape
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Interesting. I don't have Greek font. But baptizomai (baptize) comes from the root word Bapto, which means "I wash."
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