What Would you Do if You Got Zapped Back in Time?

10,141 Views | 86 Replies | Last: 6 yr ago by Double A
Dr. Nefario
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Dad-O-Lot said:

Assuming I got zapped back to the year 318 but stayed in the same physical location, I would be in a world of hurt.

What existed in Central Texas in the year 318?

I suppose I would try to carve images of technology in the limestone and really freak out future archaeologists.


If you stay in the same physical location and consider that the earth is moving through space along with everything else in the universe, you would find yourself in deep space and then explode. 1700 years later the earth would collide with your corpse.

Aggies Revenge
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AG
Maroon Stormtrooper said:

I read a book called Lest Darkness Falls about a guy that gets zapped back in time 1700 years. The dude helps Italy and the rest of Europe out of the dark ages by introducing different ideas and technologies over the course of the book. It's a pretty good book.

I'd probably get eaten by wolves or murdered by highwaymen in the first 30 minutes after getting zapped back. What about you? Do you have any special skills that would help you out?
Odds of you being called a heretic and sent to stand trial before the Pope would be quite high.

Martin Q. Blank
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Dr. Nefario said:

Dad-O-Lot said:

Assuming I got zapped back to the year 318 but stayed in the same physical location, I would be in a world of hurt.

What existed in Central Texas in the year 318?

I suppose I would try to carve images of technology in the limestone and really freak out future archaeologists.


If you stay in the same physical location and consider that the earth is moving through space along with everything else in the universe, you would find yourself in deep space and then explode. 1700 years later the earth would collide with your corpse.
What makes you think the earth is moving through space?
Aggies Revenge
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AG
Martin Q. Blank said:

Dr. Nefario said:

Dad-O-Lot said:

Assuming I got zapped back to the year 318 but stayed in the same physical location, I would be in a world of hurt.

What existed in Central Texas in the year 318?

I suppose I would try to carve images of technology in the limestone and really freak out future archaeologists.


If you stay in the same physical location and consider that the earth is moving through space along with everything else in the universe, you would find yourself in deep space and then explode. 1700 years later the earth would collide with your corpse.
What makes you think the earth is moving through space?
You might actually survive the heretic trial.
E
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Ulrich
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This is a complete 180 from how these threads usually go, but I would make sure no one does OP's mom.
Cromagnum
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Buy all the stocks I could for Amazon and Apple, then dump those earnings into Bitcoin, wait a few years and cash out. Then it would be hookers and blow like a champ.
Tatem
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I would marry an alien and get the cure for cancer
Uncle Howdy
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S
Tatem said:

I would marry an alien and get the cure for cancer


Tatem is open to being probed. Noted
BenFiasco14
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AG
Marry an Alien
IntensionAg
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chipotle said:

What if you go back and bang a chick that's somehow related to you? Does that mean you wouldn't have existed if you didn't travel back in time? But you wouldn't exist at all because there was noone before to create you...




What if you go back in time before you were born, bang your mom, and get her pregnant with yourself??
Bruce Almighty
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What if you go back in time, bang your grandmother, and get her pregnant with your dad? You would be the dad of your dad.
IntensionAg
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Bruce Almighty said:

What if you go back in time, bang your grandmother, and get her pregnant with your dad? You would be the dad of your dad.


Nah
PrestigeWorldwideAg12
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Let's see if I could go back in time, I would have made about a $50k investment when bitcoin when it was less than a dollar and sold it all back in December at just under $20k. Yea I'd be a billionaire with a B!
3 William 56
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Maroon Stormtrooper said:

ac04 said:

i would meet my ancestors when they're in roman high school and unintentionally interrupt the moment when they were supposed to meet. i'd then have to come up with a wacky scheme to make sure they fall in love to guarantee my existence in the future. at the same time i'd be working on a way to get back to the present so i could save the life of zany scientist who sent me back in time in the first place.
You should make a movie out of that!

Nobody would watch that, sounds stupid
Brian Earl Spilner
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Liquid Wrench
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I'd have to doubleback again.
Emotional Support Cobra
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I am 40 but they would probably think I am 16 because I have clear skin and a full set of teeth.
Ketchup is a vegetable
MD20/20
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Find Fran's ancestors and cockblock them
Cooter Brown is my designated driver.
JJxvi
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The Fife
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AggieDarlin said:

Probably try to pet a dog before I die
Plot twist: your cause of death will be because of a dog attack!
The Fife
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I'd figure out a way to survive 1,700 years if only to keep Jackie Sherrill from resigning and therefore saving everyone from the Fran years.
Bruce Almighty
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The Fife said:

I'd figure out a way to survive 1,700 years if only to keep Jackie Sherrill from resigning and therefore saving everyone from the Fran years.


And then Sherrill resigns in 2002.
The Fife
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Bruce Almighty said:

The Fife said:

I'd figure out a way to survive 1,700 years if only to keep Jackie Sherrill from resigning and therefore saving everyone from the Fran years.


And then Sherrill resigns in 2002.
Philo B 93
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Coin from behind the ear trick to begin a prosperous life as a sorcerer. Or invent a rocket.
AggieDarlin
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AG
The Fife said:

AggieDarlin said:

Probably try to pet a dog before I die
Plot twist: your cause of death will be because of a dog attack!


I'm okay with this. It would be an awkward tussle involving me trying to cuddle the shi- out of it and screaming, "BUT I LOVE YOU" while it tears me to pieces.
3rd and 2
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AggieDarlin said:

The Fife said:

AggieDarlin said:

Probably try to pet a dog before I die
Plot twist: your cause of death will be because of a dog attack!


I'm okay with this. It would be an awkward tussle involving me trying to cuddle the shi- out of it and screaming, "BUT I LOVE YOU" while it tears me to pieces.
That's really sweet and horrible at the same time.
TexasRebel
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AG
Is there a 1700 year old steam engine?

I guess I didn't get zapped back in time.
Drawkcab
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Even after reading the Wikipedia entry for the year 318 I don't think I could contribute any useful knowledge to the people of the day. I'd probably just try to blend in as best I could.
PseudonymK
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AG


I'd go into hiding in the woods and turn androgynous. Next, I'd hatch a plan to gain trust from the Queen by accidentally preventing her assassination, The Queen would have to make me a lord and head of security. I would nonchalantly find out the way the Queen came to power by overthrowing her husband, the former king. I would convince the rebels and peasants to band together to overthrow the mean Queen. I'd teach them football and wrestling moves to fight the armed queen's guards. After the fight the prince finds out I am a girl and the King's reign is restored, and I get married...then wake up at home.
LupinusTexensis
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All of us would be burned for witch craft.
Bruce Almighty
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TexasRebel said:

Is there a 1700 year old steam engine?

I guess I didn't get zapped back in time.


With year 300 technology, you aren't building a steam engine.
DTF_Ag
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put on that rubber...girl got my money for

smucket
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I would probably scratch myself alot. Kinda like now I guess.

Also I would invent the modern double bass drumset and do some awesome kickass solos ala Neil Peart. Those ancient homos won't know what him em. Workin man mdufckas!!
SWCBonfire
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Bruce Almighty said:

TexasRebel said:

Is there a 1700 year old steam engine?

I guess I didn't get zapped back in time.


With year 300 technology, you aren't building a steam engine.




How about 1st century technology?
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