I'm giving a best man speech soon for both the rehearsal dinner and the wedding. How long should each be?

No need to give two. Let family give speeches or make toasts at the rehearsal dinner, and then you knock one out of the park at the wedding reception. There is no hard rule on the time, but the "less is more" idea applies here. Avoid rambling. Make each statement count. If I had to guess, I'd say mine was probably about 60-90 seconds, and I had plenty to say. You can make it work if you practice. Good luck!

Length of the speech depends entirely on how long it will take you to chronicle all the hoars the groom slayed before one of them conned him into marrying her.

[This message has been edited by Beer Baron (edited 3/8/2013 6:55a).]

don't forget to say something nice about the bride

Brevity is the soul of wit.

Bonus points if you incorporate a Visio flow chart into your presentation.

have my man John-Ralphio help you.

- Take a shot or two to take the edge off
- Have an idea what you are going to say. Don't wing it (you'll sound dumb), but don't read from a script (you'll sound 0% sincere)
- Don't try too hard to be funny
- Mention the bride
- Keep the 'historical story' about the groom PG13

And I agree with the poster above. Leave rehearsal dinner to the uncles/aunts/groomsmen and save it for the real show.

quote:

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The Pistol is a pleasure-giver,
that's for sure...

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www.youtube.com/v/Nvyknw4VClE

On the other hand, a tearful and "sincere" rehearsal dinner speech stands a good chance of convincing one of the bridesmaids to go home with you the night.

DO NOT HIT THE BOOZE BEFORE YOU MAKE YOUR SPEECH It may suck, but wait until after then get hammered. I forgot I had taken some sinus meds, then had about 3 beers, THEN did the speech at my brother's reception.

I rambled on pointlessly for maybe 5 minutes before something in my mind finally said "this has gone WAY too far...END THE MISERY!" and I came up with a clever closing line for a toast, and then PRAYED that the maid of honor did even worse than I did

i took the speech from Friday Night Lights...and altered it to the occasion...it actually sounded pretty good...it turned great when a group of Aggies in the back corner yelled "Clear Eyes Full Hearts" and i responded "Can't Lose!"

Talk about how long you've known the groom and how special his friendship has been to you. Say something like "I love you, man" at the end of this section. Then switch to the first time you met the bride when she was his SO and a quick bit or two about how you could tell that she was already someone special. Close it by raising your glass and wishing them all the best that life has to offer. To groomsname and bridesname.

Keep it under two minutes (seriously, maybe three TOPS)and don't do jokes. What I listed above is bulletproof. Seriously. Short, sweet, and nobody will want jokes unless you get paid on a regular basis to make them.

No "funny" stories either. The crowd won't get them and the bride will get pissed. Trust me, I've been to a billion weddings as a guest, groomsman, and best man.

Short, sweet, and basic is what you should be shooting for.

Oh, and the best man doesn't give a speech at the rehearsal dinner. That is for family and the groomsmen.

People only remember the really good speeches or the really bad speeches. If it's a little above average, they will forget about it in a few days. If it's a little below average, they will forget about it in a few days. Point is, don't worry about it because unless you're a great speaker or a world-class moron, you're probably the only person that will remember it.

Even if it's a good story, avoid anything that has to do with living together/sex is implied from story.

Example, I was at a wedding 4 years ago that the best man discussed how he knew the newlyweds would be a great couple when he moved in with his future wife due to Hurricane Ike damage.

Conservative family on both sides flipped out and aided in their drunken ramblings.

As others have said, do not drink to much before hand. My sisters MoH was drunk during her speech and to this day no one knows WTF she was talking about.

I bought books and read up on what was my role as the best man. Brother's wife/family where big on traditional and there also wasn't going to be alcohol served at the reception (had it at the church, SMH). I had a good opening line that got lots of laughs. I only said nice things about the bride, told a PG story about my brother that made him look good, and then ended with sincear toast. After I was done the photographer came up and said that was the best speech he has heard at a wedding.

I didn't plan on saying anything at the rehersal dinner until my grandmother forced me to say something. Luckly I had a second story prepared for the reception speech that I used and just deleted it the next night. Short, to the point, and made everyone feel good.

short sweet and to the point

It should be structured like this:

1) introduce yourself
2) thank everyone for coming, the families for the great weekend
3) tell a story/joke about the groom
4) say how the bride is great for the groom
5) toast to a wonderful life

after its over, get smashed and take home one of the bride's maids

Real simple....

Say " I don't know whether to say Congratulations or You Poor Bastidge, so Congratulations You Poor Bastidge! Cheers!"

Walk to the Maid of Honor, grab her around the waist, bend her down with a long deep kiss then drop her in the floor and head to the tiddy bar in your tux!

“[BANGS FISTS] Blood alone moves the wheels of history! [pause] Have you ever asked yourselves in an hour of meditation - which everyone finds during the day - how long we have been striving for greatness? [BANGS FISTS] Not only the years we've been at war – the war of work – but from the moment as a child, when we realized that the world could be conquered.

It has been a lifetime struggle [BANGS FISTS] a never-ending fight, I say to you [BANGS FISTS], and you will understand, that it is a privilege to fight. We are warriors! [Applause]

Salesmen of Northeastern Pennsylvania, I ask you [BANGS FISTS] once more rise and be worthy of this historical hour. [More applause, and Dwight gives a maniacal laugh] No revolution is worth anything unless it can [BANGS FISTS] defend itself.

Some people will tell you salesman is a bad word. They’ll conjure up images of used car dealers, and door to door charlatans. This is our duty: to change their perception. I say, salesman – and women – of the world... unite! We must never acquiesce, for it is together... together that we prevail. We must never cede control of the Motherland...

Audience: ...for it is together that we prevail! [Thunderous applause] [BANGS FISTS, REPEATEDLY]”