I know on TexAgs I am gonna get murdered for posting this on the GB but I am looking for some serious responses as well. Last night when on the porcelain palace and doing #2 I was cleaning up and noticed my tissue paper was soaked with blood and looked down and saw a good bit of it. I cleaned up with about 3-4 wipes but was wondering if I'm dying. My wife said it could be something like an anal fissure or something a lot worse? I'm gonna go to doctor later today. I'm not in any pain or anything like that.


Humorous responses will help tide me over while I wait for doc.

Tell your wife to quit being so rough with the strap on.

Or tell her about your bf.

Good call on seeing a doc. "Soaked" with blood could mean something more than just hemorrhoids, but usually it will just be a busted hemorrhoid.

But it could be serious, so make sure to get checked out today.

You got raped!!!!

Serious answer, sounded like hemorrhoids.

Was it just on the TP? Was it floating in the water? Mixed in with the stool? Does your butt feel like you just got out of FPMITA prison? If not mixed in with your stool and no pain, probably just hemorrhoids. If it's mixed in with your stool, you probably have the colon AIDS.

If it was bright red, it was just a busted hemorrhoid. The first time it happened to me it looked like someone gutted a deer in the crapper. Just go easy and it'll heal itself in a day or so.

Aids

It was bright red. I've had lots of people that I know around here that had symptoms they could explain away and it ended up being something bad. I am just gonna get checked out sometime today just to make sure it not something serious.

I like joking about bathroom stuff too, butt.... It could be a ruptured hemroid. Blood seen, should see a Dr. I'm NOT a Dr.

It was your ass heart bursting with joy over the coming of this lovely Balemtimes Day!




Probably Hemmies, need to get it checked out.

I HAVE HEMORRHOIDS!!!

T&P for your bottom and butt doctor

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It was your ass heart bursting with joy over the coming of this lovely Balemtimes Day!




Probably Hemmies, need to get it checked out.

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Possibly a 'roid or a fissure, but don't believe the idea that if it is bright blood it is probably NOT colon cancer.

If the tumor is in the descending or sigmoid portion of the colon, it can be bright red when the blood exits.



Trust me on this. Get checked out.

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Possibly a 'roid or a fissure, but don't believe the idea that if it is bright blood it is probably NOT colon cancer.

If the tumor is in the descending or sigmoid portion of the colon, it can be bright red when the blood exits.



Trust me on this. Get checked out.

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Now I'm worried because my wife's friend just got diagnosed with stage 4 colon cancer and I am so worried that there might have been signs previously that I missed.

How old are you, and do you have a family history of colon cancer?

Don't worry until you have something to worry about. In general, bright blood is something closer to the exit like a fissure or a 'roid, but I've heard people say in the past "only if the blood is dark and mixed with the stool do you need to worry about it being cancer".

Not so.

Make an appointment and go see Dr. Jellyfinger and get it checked out. It won't be the most fun you ever had, but being a typical man and ignoring it and diagnosing yourself or letting the internet diagnose you so you end up delaying a solution to your problem also ends up being not fun.

Trust me on that, too.


Sorry to hear about your wife's friend. Has the cancer metastasized to any other parts of the body (lymph, liver, lungs, brain, etc.) or have they found out yet?

Im convinced that FNG would try to bond with just about anyone if the topic is cancer.

No, it's just that it doesn't take a day off.

A really sweet lady we know is in surgery right now at the Fun House for mesothelioma. It's been on my mind a bit more than usual.

Plus, I have to go in for my checkups soon.

And, thanks to ObamaCare, I can't withhold as much of my pay to put into my Flexible Spending Account for medical expenses next year.

Happens to me sometimes. It's always a hemorrhoid. I get them when I strain my anus too much while fapping to girl's bikini pics on the Facebook.

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fapping to girl's bikini pics on the Facebook

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Holy crap that is sad.

That much blood is probably diverticula - which are common and benign - still need a scope.

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fapping to girl's bikini pics on the Facebook

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Holy crap that is sad.

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Agreed. Grandma figured out how to block all the porn sites on the family computer and she took away my iPad. ****ing bull**** bro.

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How old are you, and do you have a family history of colon cancer?

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25 and no family history of colon cancer. Grandfather had a little cancer that they got out...don't really remember what type though.

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Don't worry until you have something to worry about. In general, bright blood is something closer to the exit like a fissure or a 'roid, but I've heard people say in the past "only if the blood is dark and mixed with the stool do you need to worry about it being cancer".

Not so.

Make an appointment and go see Dr. Jellyfinger and get it checked out. It won't be the most fun you ever had, but being a typical man and ignoring it and diagnosing yourself or letting the internet diagnose you so you end up delaying a solution to your problem also ends up being not fun.

Trust me on that, too.


Sorry to hear about your wife's friend. Has the cancer metastasized to any other parts of the body (lymph, liver, lungs, brain, etc.) or have they found out yet?

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Thanks I really try not to worry about it knowing that its in Gods hands but I know it doesn't mean sit back and not do anything. I wanna say that her friends cancer had spread to her liver but I'm not sure. Either way it's a sad situation.

It's probably nothing serious, but chances are you will soon get to experience the joys of colonoscopy.

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It's probably nothing serious, but chances are you will soon get to experience the joys of colonoscopy.

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The colonoscopy is just a nap and then you wake up and go eat since you have not had food in awhile.

The prep...that is the fun part.

Those LPD's are not fun.

Very likely, not colon cancer, but looks you are going to have to literally "prepare your anus".

Why did I read this during lunch?!

Going to Dr. later this afternoon and hopefully it will calm my nerves. Is there anything that I should ask when I'm there?

Yes.

Ask him to lube up the proctoscope and get busy.

Almost certainly not colon cancer with your bright red bleed on the toilet paper. Usually painless red blood per rectum is a sign of:

-diverticulosis (pretty common, they are out-pouchings of your colon that can erode into a blood vessel, associated with constipation)
-hemorrhoids (associated with constipation)
-brisk upper GI bleed (highly unlikely since you would have had more symptoms/passed out by now)
-occasionally, something called arteriovenous malformation (AVMs)

FWIW:
-anal fissures are usually painful when you wipe or strain
-you should see your doc - get a rectal exam done; they will prbly tell you to eat more fiber so those Lincoln logs you are pinching off aren't the consistency of granite

I look forward to your colonoscopy thread and your tales of woe the night before after drinking "the goo".