Does anyone have any thoughts or advice on how to find a therapist/counselor/whatever, what kind of questions to ask, what to look out for, etc? When it is worthwhile, what were you looking to get out of it, do you consider it successful? If you were reluctant how did you get over the hurdle of being your own outlet?

For me finding the right therapist took some amount of trial and error. There are a lot of factors in what makes a therapist good, and what makes a therapist a good fit for someone. I think that personality is probably the most important aspect and that is something you won't know until you've had a few sessions with someone. I've seen some therapists who were really pleasant to talk to. It was like venting to a friend (for $140 an hour). But it wasn't really "working" because there wasn't any growth. I eventually learned that beyond looking for someone who is compatible personality-wise, there are a lot of questions that can be asked up front that will give you an idea of how effective a therapist will be.

What is their background and experience? Where were they educated? Why did they want to become a therapist? How long have they been practicing? If they're comfortable answering basic personal questions (and it matters to you as the client), are they married? Do they have kids?

How many clients do they see regularly? Do they truly have time to take you on? What is their preferred method of communication? Is after hours communication an option in the event of a crisis? Do they handle booking and billing or do they have an assistant? Are virtual sessions an option? How do they ensure privacy within sessions (ie white noise machine outside the door, extra soundproofing)? What about confidentiality?

Do they have any areas that they specialize in or work within the most? Couples counseling? Blended families? Addiction? LGBTQ issues?

What type of therapy do they offer? CBT, psychoanalytic, humanistic, etc? What about treatments like EMDR?

Is their practice informed by any specific worldviews, such as religion or culture? If so, (and if applicable) are they able to effectively work with a client who has different beliefs or customs?

I've been seeing my current therapist for two years now and he is a great fit. I initially chose him because I hoped that my husband would join me in therapy and I knew he would only respect a male therapist. I never would have gone to see a male therapist just for myself because I assumed it would be too awkward to discuss certain things. But it was just me, and it turned out I actually really needed an assertive male therapist who wasn't afraid to challenge me and definitely wasn't in it to just be a friendly sounding board. And the awkward things can be slightly uncomfortable, but it's worth it because I've grown so, so much. This is one of the reasons why I always encourage people to be willing to try a therapist who is just a little outside of their comfort zone.

Anyway, hopefully something in this novel is helpful. Good luck!

I will echo most of what was said above. In my past experience, finding a therapist was a bit of trial and error. My ex-wife is actually a psychologist (PhD in clinical but she does not do counseling / therapy), and when we went through marriage counseling, we initially found someone to start with through Psychology Today (their website has a search feature for therapists). Started with someone close by that sounded like they might be a good fit. She was very helpful and helped us get through a divorce without killing each other .

I saw a therapist myself for about a year (CBT focus), and he was based on a referral. I really enjoyed working with him and got a lot out of it. I met with a few others initially as well, but they just never seemed to click with me.

I'm a big believer in therapy, and I feel that most people would greatly benefit by talking with one periodically. Our marriage counselor would say that most people wait too late to get help (with regards to relationships) and most would do well to see someone periodically to address issues or potential issues before they become a bigger problem. I tend to agree with that.

I used Psychology Today (mentioned above) to find my current therapist. You can browse various profiles by location, filter by what sort of thing you're looking for, and reach out to therapists that might stand out to you to schedule a consultation. It's hard to know where to start in finding a therapist, so I found this site to be helpful!

I talked with 3 or 4 different therapists before deciding on one and talking with them back to back helped me pick up on what things I did or did not like about their approach/demeanor/whatever. You can find some resources online about what to ask a therapist when "interviewing" them, which helped guide that our conversation, but for me it really did end up coming down to which person I felt the most drawn to (whatever that may mean). It's certainly okay to be picky with your therapist and I found that all the ones I talked to were aware that it was a personal and intimate decision that only I could make.

Congratulations on being open to therapy - it's hard putting yourself in a vulnerable position but can be so rewarding!

Above points are all solid. Just wanted to add this: