Howdy...our family has never been to Ren Fest, but my soon to be 12 year old is asking to go for his birthday. I'm seeing Sundays are free for kids so I'm guessing that might be a more "family friendly" day to go?

Any other suggestions for first timers that are taking kids with them?

Thanks!

Bring a camera...

Don't leave them alone with anyone who looks like this.

It's a good time for young and old. They may see some ladies in revealing clothing, but that's a good learning experience.

Bring a wagon if you have little ones. They also rent them there, I think.

Saturday or Sunday during the day will be fine. Plan to hit traffic heading from CS. with 249 now having an exit just a few miles shy of the entrance it has created a new path for tons of the north Houston traffic. I think we were stuck over an hour from 1774/249 to the entrance.

Hoping it's better this year.

Thanks!

As far as traffic goes...is it better to try and get there first thing in the morning when the gates open or wait until mid morning after things die down a bit?

We always get there before the gates open. We like to park close to the entrance and the performers put on a good show for the official gate-opening. With young kids, we stay until mid-afternoon and leave before the traffic gets bad. I've heard that the 'leaving at the close of the day' traffic can be very bad.

Get the steak on a stake!

used to be we'd leave CS around 11:45 or noon and be parked and walking in by 12:45-1.

Last year we left at noon and I think we got in at 2:30 so yes I'd get up and plan to be there when gates open. Especially with kids. Once you get a quarter through the park the place will be full anyway.

Also, I would look at a map and/or walk the park to see the different sections before deciding on what deliciously bad food you're going to buy. There's tons of options.

I appreciate the feedback!

When the gates open, we always head to the far end (Enchanted Forest area) where the giant swings and elephant/camel rides are located. We almost have the area to ourselves since everyone else stops at the attractions closer to the front gate.

Don't camp with kids.

Your 12 year old (and you) will see things you've only seen on the Internet before. A great learning experience for him. You'll be the best dad ever!

I went the year before COVID.

I'll say this: "It was everything I thought it would be and nothing like I thought it would be...all at the same time."

The above is right. It might be a good idea to wait til the temps come down some which will reduce the chances of women wearing really skimpy **** like chain link bikinis with nothing under them. There's not a lot of that but it does happen.

Just tell your boy not to stare more than 2 seconds- and pop the back of his head if he does.
It will be great practice for being married one day.

He has seen much worse on the internet with his buddies.

Around 12 my dad had taken me to Houston Wrestling at Sam Houston Coliseum, stag parties where I learned the basics of shooting craps and how to pull beer from a keg, Bullfights and cockfights in Mexico where the animals fought to the death.

Can't shelter him forever.

Animal Eight 84 said:

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Just tell your boy not to stare more than 2 seconds- and pop the back of his head if he does.
It will be great practice for being married one day.

He has seen much worse on the internet with his buddies.

Around 12 my dad had taken me to Houston Wrestling at Sam Houston Coliseum, stag parties where I learned the basics of shooting craps and how to pull beer from a keg, Bullfights and cockfights in Mexico where the animals fought to the death.

Can't shelter him forever.

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There was a dude in my class in elementary that nobody messed with because his dad had the meanest cock fighter around....no lie

I've never been but I just read up on it and allegedly this is the largest in the world. There are several in Texas but not anywhere close in attendance. I'm curious enough to be interested but not enough to spend hours in line.

TyHolden said:

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I've never been but I just read up on it and allegedly this is the largest in the world. There are several in Texas but not anywhere close in attendance. I'm curious enough to be interested but not enough to spend hours in line.

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The answer is get there EARLY....plan on being there about an hour before gates open. Traffic will be lighter, you will be close to the gate with parking....even more important, you will be close to the gate when leaving. There are bathrooms outside the gate, there will be people selling maps and programs. There are picture opportunities while you wait. Be sure to catch the bird show.

If you're taking kids, go in the gate and stay to the left all the way back. More entertainment that direction. The right split is more booths.

TyHolden said:

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I've never been but I just read up on it and allegedly this is the largest in the world. There are several in Texas but not anywhere close in attendance. I'm curious enough to be interested but not enough to spend hours in line.

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You won't spend hours in line. Once you park and walk in the longest i've stood in line at the actual entrance was maybe 15-20 minutes and we always go on some of the busier weekends when the weather turns nice.

The drive to the fair situation was just a matter of it being the first time 249 had been built up enough to get there and we didn't exactly leave early so we drove right into the heavy portion of people arriving.

I'd recommend everyone go once. It's a great way to kill a saturday, people watching is awesome and there's great food and beer.

I go to this one and the Sherwood one near Bastrop in the spring every year. Great fun, great people watching, good food and brews. Not terribly expensive overall unless you take a school aged niece who wants to do all the rides and little games and such that cost extra.

Love the Raptor show. The fire whip dude is impressive as well.

The Sherwood one has a VIP bird tour that is well worth it if you love them like I do. You get to fly and handle the birds a bit.

Our daughter has been obsessed with it since we took her when she was 10 or so. We try to go at least once a year. We have handicapped tags, so getting there early isn't necessary for us to get close parking. We normally get there about 11 or so in order to watch the parade through town. If your family likes to be up early and see all the production before and as they open, it is fun!

The things to watch for are the scantily clad adults, random role playing folks yelling at you, inappropriate language at times. There are also some crazy costumes! A lot of the extra people dressed up, performing, standing stationary, etc. are paid professionals. They take it all very seriously and stay in character the ENTIRE day!! Some of the 'beggars' and 'vagabonds' sit around and yell obscenities or nonsense at people as they walked by. We just explained to our daughter to just keep walking and ignore them. Most of the time I can't really understand what they are mumbling.

If you check online, you will find a listing of special events. Some of those are really neat. We try to always go the weekend after Thanksgiving while all the crazy people are at the Black Friday deals, we are having a blast at RenFest! Even when it is 'crowded,' there is enough room to move around and feel like you have space.

Check Groupon for discounted tickets!

So I thought the Ded Bob show was a goner after "Smuj" died last year. But it looks like there are other performers that were working with the original guy even when he was still alive. The Ded Bob website says they'll be in Texas, but the Festival website does not have them listed on the schedule.

Duckhook said:

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So I thought the Ded Bob show was a goner after "Smuj" died last year. But it looks like there are other performers that were working with the original guy even when he was still alive. The Ded Bob website says they'll be in Texas, but the Festival website does not have them listed on the schedule.

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Saw the new Ded Bob show last year. It's not the same. I suppose anyone who had not seen the original would enjoy it but for us long time Bobmotizees…

But OP, definitely go. RenFest is a blast!

Tailgate88 said:

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Duckhook said:

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So I thought the Ded Bob show was a goner after "Smuj" died last year. But it looks like there are other performers that were working with the original guy even when he was still alive. The Ded Bob website says they'll be in Texas, but the Festival website does not have them listed on the schedule.

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Saw the new Ded Bob show last year. It's not the same. I suppose anyone who had not seen the original would enjoy it but for us long time Bobmotizees…

But OP, definitely go. RenFest is a blast!

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Bobzombies

We saw him one year when my daughter was probably 13 or 14. She and her younger brother (5 years younger) wanted a picture after the show. As I was taking it, Ded Bob looks at my daughter and says "my, isn't she pubescing nicely". I mean, it's part of the schtick so you can't really get too upset about it. My younger son asked me what he meant. I just said it meant she was growing up.

OP, somewhere/sometime during the day you're going to be exposed to some bawdy stuff. But it's not all day everywhere. You'll find a lot of fun stuff to do. Go to some shows and yell and cheer with the crowd. You'll have a good time.

Smuj died? Aww....

Duckhook said:

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Tailgate88 said:

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Duckhook said:

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So I thought the Ded Bob show was a goner after "Smuj" died last year. But it looks like there are other performers that were working with the original guy even when he was still alive. The Ded Bob website says they'll be in Texas, but the Festival website does not have them listed on the schedule.

---

Saw the new Ded Bob show last year. It's not the same. I suppose anyone who had not seen the original would enjoy it but for us long time Bobmotizees…

But OP, definitely go. RenFest is a blast!

---

Bobzombies

We saw him one year when my daughter was probably 13 or 14. She and her younger brother (5 years younger) wanted a picture after the show. As I was taking it, Ded Bob looks at my daughter and says "my, isn't she pubescing nicely". I mean, it's part of the schtick so you can't really get too upset about it. My younger son asked me what he meant. I just said it meant she was growing up.

OP, somewhere/sometime during the day you're going to be exposed to some bawdy stuff. But it's not all day everywhere. You'll find a lot of fun stuff to do. Go to some shows and yell and cheer with the crowd. You'll have a good time.

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bawdy? It ain't near as bad as it used to be... I used to be the official photographer for the place.. Got to go every day during the weekends and several times in the week for commercial shots... I've seen women get pinched by their chain mail bikinis and remove it in public... I've seen guys wearing nothing but a banana hammock and a leash (weird guy being lead around the fair by a ... ahem... very domineering lady wearing spikes and leather...I think they got kicked out.). stuff like that...

my niece wanted to work there and I absolutely refused to let her... even though she's just my niece.. there were pretty much orgies and drug parties in the back...

its calmed WAAAYYYY down since the early 90s...

d

studioone said:

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Duckhook said:

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Tailgate88 said:

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Duckhook said:

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So I thought the Ded Bob show was a goner after "Smuj" died last year. But it looks like there are other performers that were working with the original guy even when he was still alive. The Ded Bob website says they'll be in Texas, but the Festival website does not have them listed on the schedule.

---

Saw the new Ded Bob show last year. It's not the same. I suppose anyone who had not seen the original would enjoy it but for us long time Bobmotizees…

But OP, definitely go. RenFest is a blast!

---

Bobzombies

We saw him one year when my daughter was probably 13 or 14. She and her younger brother (5 years younger) wanted a picture after the show. As I was taking it, Ded Bob looks at my daughter and says "my, isn't she pubescing nicely". I mean, it's part of the schtick so you can't really get too upset about it. My younger son asked me what he meant. I just said it meant she was growing up.

OP, somewhere/sometime during the day you're going to be exposed to some bawdy stuff. But it's not all day everywhere. You'll find a lot of fun stuff to do. Go to some shows and yell and cheer with the crowd. You'll have a good time.

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bawdy? It ain't near as bad as it used to be... I used to be the official photographer for the place.. Got to go every day during the weekends and several times in the week for commercial shots... I've seen women get pinched by their chain mail bikinis and remove it in public... I've seen guys wearing nothing but a banana hammock and a leash (weird guy being lead around the fair by a ... ahem... very domineering lady wearing spikes and leather...I think they got kicked out.). stuff like that...

my niece wanted to work there and I absolutely refused to let her... even though she's just my niece.. there were pretty much orgies and drug parties in the back...

its calmed WAAAYYYY down since the early 90s...

d

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Yeah, probably so. But the definition of bawdy is "humorously indecent". I think I used it right.

I don't know when it happened (late 2000s/early 2010s) but there used to be comedy duo called, I think, "The Other Brothers", one of them was a big guy and the other a manlet, but it was fairly tame as far as the shows went.

studioone said:

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bawdy? It ain't near as bad as it used to be... I used to be the official photographer for the place.. Got to go every day during the weekends and several times in the week for commercial shots... I've seen women get pinched by their chain mail bikinis and remove it in public... I've seen guys wearing nothing but a banana hammock and a leash (weird guy being lead around the fair by a ... ahem... very domineering lady wearing spikes and leather...I think they got kicked out.). stuff like that...

my niece wanted to work there and I absolutely refused to let her... even though she's just my niece.. there were pretty much orgies and drug parties in the back...

its calmed WAAAYYYY down since the early 90s...

d

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I've heard the "real" camping (not the "quiet" camping) is the one with the orgies and degeneracy.

Duckhook said:

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Your 12 year old (and you) will see things you've only seen on the Internet before. A great learning experience for him. You'll be the best dad ever!

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This post makes me want to go again, been a few years. I just think all the cool hats are Grrrreat!!

Duckhook said:

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studioone said:

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Duckhook said:

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Tailgate88 said:

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Duckhook said:

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So I thought the Ded Bob show was a goner after "Smuj" died last year. But it looks like there are other performers that were working with the original guy even when he was still alive. The Ded Bob website says they'll be in Texas, but the Festival website does not have them listed on the schedule.

---

Saw the new Ded Bob show last year. It's not the same. I suppose anyone who had not seen the original would enjoy it but for us long time Bobmotizees…

But OP, definitely go. RenFest is a blast!

---

Bobzombies

We saw him one year when my daughter was probably 13 or 14. She and her younger brother (5 years younger) wanted a picture after the show. As I was taking it, Ded Bob looks at my daughter and says "my, isn't she pubescing nicely". I mean, it's part of the schtick so you can't really get too upset about it. My younger son asked me what he meant. I just said it meant she was growing up.

OP, somewhere/sometime during the day you're going to be exposed to some bawdy stuff. But it's not all day everywhere. You'll find a lot of fun stuff to do. Go to some shows and yell and cheer with the crowd. You'll have a good time.

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bawdy? It ain't near as bad as it used to be... I used to be the official photographer for the place.. Got to go every day during the weekends and several times in the week for commercial shots... I've seen women get pinched by their chain mail bikinis and remove it in public... I've seen guys wearing nothing but a banana hammock and a leash (weird guy being lead around the fair by a ... ahem... very domineering lady wearing spikes and leather...I think they got kicked out.). stuff like that...

my niece wanted to work there and I absolutely refused to let her... even though she's just my niece.. there were pretty much orgies and drug parties in the back...

its calmed WAAAYYYY down since the early 90s...

d

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Yeah, probably so. But the definition of bawdy is "humorously indecent". I think I used it right.

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Ah the 90s, where I used to wear nothing but a sword, back scabbard, and a loin cloth!

A decade ago, I used to deliver the fortified wine mixes by the pallet to the different beverage folks out there along with a couple of pallets of wax they use for the "dip your hand in wax" attraction.

Only went a couple times as a spectator but as LOYAL AG stated earlier, chain mail as a garment can been seen. Saw a young lady in a chain mail mini dress and zero clothing underneath. It was getting toward sunset by that time... the freaks really do come out at night.

I agree it is much more family friendly than in the 90s!

Also, if your son is interested in the characters, etc, be sure to meet the king. He is very nice and loves interacting with kids.

If you buy anything, other than food/drink, you can negotiate and barter with most of the shop owners.