I admit, I am unworth of the honor of best man if I have to ask this to the public, but do I make a "toast" (speech) at the Rehersal Dinner or Wedding Reception...or both?

Any tips?

The way we did it, it at rehearsal dinner, every man gave a small piece of advice that we had come across in our years of life (partner advice, not some lame advice on cars or something).

I gave the toast the wedding reception.

[This message has been edited by csagyo (edited 6/22/2011 1:09p).]

I would talk to the groom's mother about the rehersal dinner and to the bride's mother about the reception. (I assume that both sets of parents are involved and are perhaps the "hosts" of these events.) It would generally be more appropriate for the best man to make a short toast at the rehersal dinner.

Most toasts (if there are any) at wedding receptions are generally made by parents, welcoming their new sons and daughters.

The clue is to be prepared, say very nice things and speak very briefly. IMO, anything longer than two minutes is too long.

Generally, the best man and maid/matron of honor will give toast at the reception, and sometimes a parent (usually a parent of the bride). You don't want much more than that though because your guests will get bored.

The rehearsal dinner is the better venue for a lot of people speaking.

You don't need to say anything at the rehearsal if you are going to talk at the reception.

What csagyo said.

+1 for what csagyo said.

For help on constructing your toast, I suggest you watch "4 Wedding and A Funeral", "Wedding Crashers", and "The Wedding Singer". Depending upon your outlook, they should give you some ideas as to theme and content. Good luck!

+10 for what Villager said...


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Toast at RD is proper. Speech would be voluntary.

We didn't have a toast of any sort at the rehearsal dinner.

The Best Man gave a speech at the reception. My Maid of Honor was too chicken to give a speech.

Ask the bride and groom and see what they want. Everyone does it differently these days.

take the most embarrasing thing oyu know about the groom and go from there...

I hear speeches about 50 times a year.. the ones who wing it are the best.

Be sure you know the difference between "toast" and "roast" and know whether your audience will be appreciative.

A friend of ours "roasted" his brother and new sister in law and her family refused to speak to him afterwards. No sense of humor at all...

You should make a toast during the wedding reception, not the rehearsal dinner. You can make a small toast if you want but nothing big. This is the polite thing to do.

Reception

As best man… I say BOTH!

Make sure you are drunk, it's always easier!

Here's what Emily Post says:

{Rehearsal Dinner}
The first toast is made by the dinner's host - usually the groom's father - during the main course. The toast is often met by a "return toast" from the bride's father. Then it's open season - the mother's of the bride and groom, the best man and maid/matron of honor, other wedding attendants, family, and close friends.

{Wedding Reception}
.Traditionally, the first toast at the wedding reception is made by the best man. This is the most formal of all wedding-related toasts, and it occurs after all the guests have been provided with champagne or a nonalcoholic alternative. At a sit-down dinner, the toast is made as soon as everyone is seated; at a cocktail reception, it's made after the couple arrives. It's fine if the best man's toast is the only one made. Often, the fathers of the couple will toast each other's families and the marriage of their children. The maid/matron of honor may offer a toast, and the bride and the groom may toast their families and each other.

It's hard to wing a good toast; it's better if you prepare your remarks ahead of time. You'll never go wrong if you keep it short and sweet. The best toasts last a minute or two - three at most - and can even be just a few lines, such as:

I'd like to take a moment to congratulate Mike and Kathryn on their engagement. Let's raise our glasses to a long life filled with happiness and love for both of them. To Kathryn and Mike!

Make it short, make it sweet, and don't drink until you've delivered your toast.