So the other night I came home from Wal-Mart with the required Crystal Light Mojito, a loaf of white bread, 1.5 lbs of black forest ham, a stick of Old Spice deodorant and these:
Holy chit, was I like a god to my kid. These things looked awesome. Squirt guns have sure changed a lot since the 80s when daddy last played with them. Daddy batteried them up and out we went.
First of all, you can't whine and cry when Daddy shoots you, then turn around and shoot Daddy. Once we got that straight, we ran all over the yard and had a ball.
The boy, or as I am calling him, Sam Tzu, realized early what "Tactical Advantage" means in a practical sense. When his squirt gun ran out of ammo, he would cry and say "Play Daddy's gun!" at which point I would surrender my weapon, take his empty one, and sprint for the hose. He would follow, laughing, all the way, and just soaked the **** out of my ass crack while I was filling up his erstwhile empty mag.
I am SO buying some more of these.
Or maybe some of these
Or maybe one of these
At any rate, while he may have seized the opportunity to light up daddy while daddy was out of ammo, I'll tell you what he didn't have an answer for... well chosen cover and suppressing fire. He sat down on the lawn and cried. I thought it was a teachable moment. Mommy yelled at me.
Three year olds are bull****. They're almost big enough to be a LOT of fun, but you still have to navigate all their emotions. They're like little women, basically.
Holy chit, was I like a god to my kid. These things looked awesome. Squirt guns have sure changed a lot since the 80s when daddy last played with them. Daddy batteried them up and out we went.
First of all, you can't whine and cry when Daddy shoots you, then turn around and shoot Daddy. Once we got that straight, we ran all over the yard and had a ball.
The boy, or as I am calling him, Sam Tzu, realized early what "Tactical Advantage" means in a practical sense. When his squirt gun ran out of ammo, he would cry and say "Play Daddy's gun!" at which point I would surrender my weapon, take his empty one, and sprint for the hose. He would follow, laughing, all the way, and just soaked the **** out of my ass crack while I was filling up his erstwhile empty mag.
I am SO buying some more of these.
Or maybe some of these
Or maybe one of these
At any rate, while he may have seized the opportunity to light up daddy while daddy was out of ammo, I'll tell you what he didn't have an answer for... well chosen cover and suppressing fire. He sat down on the lawn and cried. I thought it was a teachable moment. Mommy yelled at me.
Three year olds are bull****. They're almost big enough to be a LOT of fun, but you still have to navigate all their emotions. They're like little women, basically.
