Tell the company they were great and get out of the interview ASAP?

Or

Provide constructive feedback, provide examples, and know your answers will prompt an internal investigation.

Or

Somewhere in the middle….constructive feedback but exclude the key words that will prompt concern or internal investigations.

Discuss.

If you're leaving because they can't change or are not receptive to constructive criticism, make it short and sweet.

Nothing material changes following an exit interview. Say thanks for the opportunity and move on. You are likely only harming yourself for a boomerang opportunity should that ever surface down the line.

Best advice I ever got from a mentor was that the best thing an employee can do is to decline to participate in an exit interview/survey. You have absolutely nothing to gain but risk a lot by opening up.

People still do exit interviews?
Seems like a very '90s or early 2000s thing to do…

These seem entirely pointless. No one gets anything out of these. Anything even slightly negative and the (former) employee is branded as disgruntled and not re-hirable.

I'd decline first. If unavoidable, just remain neutral and keep it brief.

I was forced to participate in one after 13 years with a fortune 300 company. I was being laid off after upper mgmt decided to close a store I maintained my office in (I was asked to moved to give leadership to the store and new branch manager).

I am not the guy to ask a question if you don't really want to know the answer to. I do not sugar coat things as I was always taught to never leave someone wondering what you really meant to say. It's a blessing and a curse I suppose.

I called the upper management out for lack of support in that particular location. Lack of using true purchasing power, being untruthful about my future when I was asked to move (I was told in the event the store was closed, I would be transferred back to my previous store) along with serveral other things.

The interesting thing was I got my management bonus (not quite all of it) they re structured the entire purchasing/inventory control system and now purchase centrally so each item costs the same to land in each store.

I felt like after being there as long as I was, my perception would have been valuable to them so I gave it. I never intended to work for that company again and now use their competitor for other operations and they know it. I still get calls to this day asking if I have interest in returning and I decline each time. I've switched industries and am much happier where I am.

I like hearing from my younger folks that leave on ways to improve.

We're a small firm <50 people and can sometimes implement the items discussed or changes they saw being needed.

Don't see why so many would be against it.

Why not hear them out before they leave?

texan12 said:

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If you're leaving because they can't change or are not receptive to constructive criticism, make it short and sweet.

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I'm leaving because a networking connection from 2 years ago reached out and said he had to have me on his team. It's a 30% pay raise and full remote. I wasn't looking to leave the company.


Thanks for the responses. I've always been of the opinion to be thankful for the opportunity and slide on out the door. It's a small world out there and would hate to leave a bad taste with anyone.

OnlyForNow said:

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I like hearing from my younger folks that leave on ways to improve.

We're a small firm <50 people and can sometimes implement the items discussed or changes they saw being needed.

Don't see why so many would be against it.

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I can see that with a small company, way less bureaucracy than a large company

texan12 said:

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Why not hear them out before they leave?

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Because some people are more forthcoming when they don't have anything to lose; other people are paranoid about divulging too much for fear of retaliation.

Being a small company is different because he actually wants the feedback whereas a big company is just a knee jerk reaction to someone leaving. It's a formality and nothing else.

That goes along with the company culture. If an employee has one foot out the door and something of value to provide, that's the companies' loss.

We had two people just leave our team in the last couple of months. (Large company, 20k+ employees) Both did exit interviews and were honest.

Word got around what they said, and it's now being used against them as they're applying with other companies in the same industry. As those companies reach out for references. Right or wrong, it happens.

For a small company, maybe they value the feedback. For a large company, I'd keep my mouth shut. They don't really care.

I can see the differences in large V small companies.

AJ02 said:

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We had two people just leave our team in the last couple of months. (Large company, 20k+ employees) Both did exit interviews and were honest.

Word got around what they said, and it's now being used against them as they're applying with other companies in the same industry. As those companies reach out for references. Right or wrong, it happens.

For a small company, maybe they value the feedback. For a large company, I'd keep my mouth shut. They don't really care.

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I'm curious. If what they said was truthful, how could it be used against them?

Worst exit interview experience I've had was with my last company. A third party company called me about a month or so after I quit. And of course, they always called at the worst times. If you want me to do an exit interview, it needs to be on your time, aka before I leave.

company I work for now does "Onboarding Interviews" for IT. After about a month on the job we have an informal meeting with the CTO and they get to know us a little more. Why did we leave our last company? What did they do good/bad? In the ~7 years I've been here there have been some good culture changes that have come about, from FlexTime to more WFH (pre-covid that set us up nicely). I think that is better than an exit interview.

Opt out and go grab a beer.

If 'they' really were interested in feedback they'd have a suggestion box... or quiz you while you were employed, and not waiting until the last day.

Exit interviews, as one poster said, are so 90's.

Worked at a small company, and I respected the owner.

On my exit interview, I layed out that the reason I quit was because they had put a coworker in charge of the department that was extremely lazy, and that the rest of the department ended up with more work because of it. Even told them the new guy only out of college a few years would be a better leader. Did this against advice from others because the owner was a good guy that also told it how it was and avoided the corporate BS stuff I hate.

New guy is now leading his own group at a different company, lazy guy got demoted after there was nobody left to do his work for him, and the company called me back a few months later asking me to come back under the condition that I never had to work with lazy coworker again. We came close to agreeing on a price, but it didn't quite work out. The department was changed from a group that went out and got work, to one that only handled internal issues. I can walk back into that company and have a job the next day if I want, and they will go back to getting work from outside sources.

Small companies often are interested in your opinions and are willing to fix actual problems.

AgLA06 said:

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AJ02 said:

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We had two people just leave our team in the last couple of months. (Large company, 20k+ employees) Both did exit interviews and were honest.

Word got around what they said, and it's now being used against them as they're applying with other companies in the same industry. As those companies reach out for references. Right or wrong, it happens.

For a small company, maybe they value the feedback. For a large company, I'd keep my mouth shut. They don't really care.

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I'm curious. If what they said was truthful, how could it be used against them?

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I didn't explain it correctly. They bad-mouthed my current company (company they were leaving and that was conducting the exit interview). Word got out to people within the company what they said and who they said things about. Now those former co-workers are looking for jobs with competitors. Competitors call for references, and people within current company (whom they bad-mouthed) are not keen on providing good references.

Not saying it's wrong or right. But just another reason I fully intend to keep my mouth shut in any exit interview. I'm not planning to burn any bridges. HR departments at big companies don't typically use the info gained at exit interviews to actually make the departments better to retain employees. It's typically used as back-stabbing, water cooler gossip.

If you are dealing with a turd from HR, ignore them and skip the interview. Every time, no exceptions.

If you are dealing with owner or main manager from small company, maybe you do an interview. If they were decent people and they really want to improve, help them out.

Under no circumstances should this be a Festivus "airing of grievances".

tamuags08 said:

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Nothing material changes following an exit interview. Say thanks for the opportunity and move on. You are likely only harming yourself for a boomerang opportunity should that ever surface down the line.

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Agree.
I have done some where I gave honest feedback (which was bad) but now I feel it was useless. I would pass on an exit interview.

I used to do exit interviews for my employees and always wanted to hear truthful answers. Was the only way I could be better as a manager.

In my experience though it's all about doing it constructively.
"John my coworker is an a-hole and the fact that you promoted him is a joke" is received very differently than "I think that the evaluation and respective opportunities for people in the department isn't always handled fairly". Or "you treat us like slaves" is different than "the extra hours away from family, often with little or no warning just wasn't tenable for me".

True story though, I did an exit interview with a woman who worked for me, and she decided that was a good time to tell me she was into me. She said she waited til then because she didn't want to mess up work, but now that she was leaving she didn't have a other chance. Talk about an awkward HR landmjne.

oragator said:

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True story though, I did an exit interview with a woman who worked for me, and she decided that was a good time to tell me she was into me. She said she waited til then because she didn't want to mess up work, but now that she was leaving she didn't have a other chance. Talk about an awkward HR landmjne.

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And now your married?

Haha, I wasn't attracted to her. So I had to politely tell her thanks but no thanks, in a work setting. I let her give me her email and said good luck. And to make things more complicated I was just starting something with another woman in the office, but that was a secret - we weren't breaking company policy but the politics of it had us keeping quiet. So when I told her about what happened, I made the mistake of telling her I gave her a hug on her way out to be nice, which didn't go over well. And these days that would probably be an HR violation too.
But that company was crazy, everyone hooked up with someone there. Was a fun place to be.

Complete digression from the topic, my apologies.

oragator said:

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True story though, I did an exit interview with a woman who worked for me, and she decided that was a good time to tell me she was into me. She said she waited til then because she didn't want to mess up work, but now that she was leaving she didn't have a other chance. Talk about an awkward HR landmjne.

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And did you both start humping each other on the meeting room table like they do in the movies?

I let loose at one exit interview. I mean provided documentation that showed a director needed to be fired because they were bad at their job and were misleading how they were reporting key items to the board of directors. (They did get fired shortly after)


It came back to bite me a few years later when I was interviewing for a job and the guy interviewing me knew this person and reached out to them.

Was it worth it? Sure but only because I'm more spiteful than smart.

All you should do on an exit interview is it exact same thing you would do in the resignation letter. Thank them for the time and the opportunity. If pressed for something they can improve say something meaningless like the coffee could be better

I say somewhere in the middle.

I conducted an exit interview with one of my Marketing Specialists a few weeks back and at first everything was constructive and good feedback (her biggest thing was flex schedules, which I'm trying to get implemented), but then she started going scorched earth on her coworkers and how she couldn't stand working for us anymore. She basically called the Marketing Director an idiot.

Sure enough, she came back about two weeks later saying the new job she took wasn't what she thought it was going to be and asked for her job back. We had to turn her away because of how she ended the interview (and I had already backfilled her role)

One of my favorite quotes is 'the standard you walk by is the standard you accept'.

If you've spoken up about what your concerns are, remind people of that and leave it there. If not, don't use the exit interview as your 20/20 moment like you cared that much in the first place.

Early in my career, I was in a field not really close to what I've done the vast majority of my career and it was something I really didn't like very much. I got decent reviews and bonuses but didn't like my job and really didn't like my boss. I found a new job and quit and had my first real exit interview. I was close to some co-workers who all shared the same feelings (including not liking the job at all or the boss) so I let it fly in the exit interview. Word got out at the company (which was small) and it really put that boss in a bad hole. I wouldn't say it ruined their reputation, but definitely damaged it. You read that and might say well… sounds like she deserved it and that's partially true. But the fact was, I didn't like my job there, knew it wasn't a career for me and only cared enough about it to pay rent while I found my path long term. I didn't even care enough to give my boss the feedback directly when I worked for them which was unfair to that person. That boss did care about all of that but nobody (including me) gave them the feedback they needed to hear because nobody was that attached to that whole situation so we were all accepting low standards because we were all thinking more about our exit plans rather than how to improve the current situation. Just be mindful that your words harm other people so don't use an exit interview to be a cathartic experience if you were ambivalent enough to the culture or people at your work to not contribute any feedback before you began your exit plan.

ATM9000 said:

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Just be mindful that your words harm other people so don't use an exit interview to be a cathartic experience if you were ambivalent enough to the culture or people at your work to not contribute any feedback before you began your exit plan.

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How would you handle it today if your boss was an a-hole who was actively working to undermine you, throw you under the bus, steal credit for your work?
I was in that situation. My boss had no technical background unlike myself. They were in a tight spot when they hired me as one product needed a product manager and I joined the company. Once the phase was over, then I believe he felt threatened and so did all of that. Then he was getting moved to VP and his position was going to be free and wanted to bring his buddy in so wanted to push me out.

Effer.

I told the company that I left because of my manager. Interestingly he ended up leaving after about 6 months but he did well for himself, and ended up at Amazon.

infinity ag said:

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ATM9000 said:

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Just be mindful that your words harm other people so don't use an exit interview to be a cathartic experience if you were ambivalent enough to the culture or people at your work to not contribute any feedback before you began your exit plan.

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How would you handle it today if your boss was an a-hole who was actively working to undermine you, throw you under the bus, steal credit for your work?
I was in that situation. My boss had no technical background unlike myself. They were in a tight spot when they hired me as one product needed a product manager and I joined the company. Once the phase was over, then I believe he felt threatened and so did all of that. Then he was getting moved to VP and his position was going to be free and wanted to bring his buddy in so wanted to push me out.

Effer.

I told the company that I left because of my manager. Interestingly he ended up leaving after about 6 months but he did well for himself, and ended up at Amazon.

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If you addressed it with your manager or tried to or addressed it with other decision makers, then fair game in an exit interview to remind people you did this but since it is a reminder going scorched earth shouldn't be necessary.

Ultimately, nobody is infallible. Everything you are describing could be out of spite or it could be an honest misunderstanding. But if you never explored or spoke about the underlying issues, then you did your manager and frankly yourself a disservice when it comes to holding up good culture and relationships and I'd contend it's a little disingenuous to claim you cared that much in the first place.

I think the obvious retort to this is fear of retaliation or retribution. On the surface that's fair. But… everybody posting here is a grown up as is everybody they work with and will probably face professional bullies more than once in their career. It's your duty to be brave enough to speak up about it… if nothing improves, you are probably leaving anyway so who cares about a little confrontation or temporary discomfort. Ie if you genuinely feel mistreated, it is pretty much always 100% worth the risk to speak up about it and try to clear the air of a workplace misunderstanding. This is something I wish I understood very early in my career… but I am happy I learned it early on in the example above where it has helped me grow some important professional relationships and how to articulate when and why I have frustrations productively.

Happened to me. Ran into a bully I couldn't beat who's besty was the division HR manager. He was married to someone related to an executive at the parent company. He told me he was going to get me fired and I would be the third one he had done that to to retain control.

I figured while I was looking for another job I might as well do what I could to minimize his ability to do that to anyone else. He eventually got his way, but in the process corporate couldn't ignore the situation. Last I heard he had been reassigned and the HR manager was no longer with the company. Everyone lost, but hopefully his ability to be a narcissistic jerk is limited moving forward.

AgLA06 said:

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Happened to me. Ran into a bully I couldn't beat who's besty was the division HR manager. He was married to someone related to an executive at the parent company. He told me he was going to get me fired and I would be the third one he had done that to to retain control.

I figured while I was looking for another job I might as well do what I could to minimize his ability to do that to anyone else. He eventually got his way, but in the process corporate couldn't ignore the situation. Last I heard he had been reassigned and the HR manager was no longer with the company. Everyone lost, but hopefully his ability to be a narcissistic jerk is limited moving forward.

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You had the grown up conversation it sounds like which sounds like it triggered some actions for you. Don't get me wrong… that sucks, but I doubt you regret doing it. It made your decision obvious and probably saved you some time of daily misery. Worth the risk and confrontation.

That's all I'm saying. If you are at an exit interview and using it to reveal things nobody knew already… then you didn't do it right at the job you are leaving.