Now that I'm waiting outside the Courthouse to sit for jury duty selection, what is the craziest excuse you've heard for getting out of duty?

Trust me. This will be far more entertaining than any replies you get to this thread.

https://texags.com/forums/6/topics/3106171

nm

Wrong thread

My favorite is when people act like they can't speak english. Wish I had the ability to pull that off.

If you don't want to be in the jury why even bother showing up? There's zero proof, it's just honor system, that you over the summons.

Is it just an Internet flex to cry and moan about it?

If you don't want to be there the defendant probably doesn't want you there either.

My employer pays me for jury duty, so I'm not dickish enough to try to get out of it.

Just claim you believe in the idea of jury nullification. You'll be off that jury in no time flat.

Shoefly! said:

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Now that I'm waiting outside the Courthouse to sit for jury duty selection, what is the craziest excuse you've heard for getting out of duty?

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I was in vore dire for a murder trial and one of the counselors asked if anyone would struggle to be impartial considering a gun crime. Mousey Hispanic woman raises her hand.

Counsel: "And why is that?"

Woman: "I've been shot."

I was on a jury for a federal case in Houston back in 2016. Lasted almost 6 weeks. I found it fascinating and excruciating at the same time.

We get the justice system we deserve.

It's unfortunate that we have a justice system that asks for participation. Don't they know that it's inconvenient for people and causes a little discomfort in their life.

Back when citizenship had value, and wasn't **** on by the left, it was more of an honor to be on a jury.

I've never heard anything really crazy. Most people seemed honest enough about it, mostly work or family obligations or hardships. I always show, but have yet to be empaneled.

CyanideJenkins said:

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I was on a jury for a federal case in Houston back in 2016. Lasted almost 6 weeks. I found it fascinating and excruciating at the same time.

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I got selected for a jury (county, criminal) a few months ago. Trial lasted a week. One of the worst things I've ever been through. But yes, seeing the process from that side was fascinating, especially when the judge and both sets of attorneys came in to talk to us afterwards.

Ghost of Andrew Eaton said:

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We get the justice system we deserve.

It's unfortunate that we have a justice system that asks for participation. Don't they know that it's inconvenient for people and causes a little discomfort in their life.

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I'm lucky I get paid when off for jury duty. Many are not. It is a hardship for them.

I had a professor for one of my JuCo classes that had a heart attack that day at the courthouse. People thought he was faking it, but nope, it was an actual heart attack.

When we saw him next, he said "I've got good news and bad news! The bad news is I had a heart attack. The good news is I'm still here and got out of jury duty!"

I made it as far as voir dire on a personal injury case. A woman with a settlement from a previous case got in another car crash and was looking to cash out again. She looked pretty much as you would expect, a fat slob.

Her lawyer asked me what I thought of asking for pain and suffering beyond documented medical expenses. My response earned me a tongue lashing from the judge, but got me bounced. Being an engineer also factored into that I'm sure.

Logos Stick said:

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Ghost of Andrew Eaton said:

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We get the justice system we deserve.

It's unfortunate that we have a justice system that asks for participation. Don't they know that it's inconvenient for people and causes a little discomfort in their life.

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I'm lucky I get paid when off for jury duty. Many are not. It is a hardship for them.

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A democratic republic requires sacrifice.

TriAg2010 said:

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Shoefly! said:

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Now that I'm waiting outside the Courthouse to sit for jury duty selection, what is the craziest excuse you've heard for getting out of duty?

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I was in vore dire for a murder trial and one of the counselors asked if anyone would struggle to be impartial considering a gun crime. Mousey Hispanic woman raises her hand.

Counsel: "And why is that?"

Woman: "I've been shot."

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Wife got called up for a drunk driving trial. Judge asked if anyone might not be impartial. She responded, told the judge that our daughter was injured and permanently disabled by a drunk driver (ankle injury). Told him she would listen to the evidence, decide impartially, but if guilty, she'd advocate for throwing the book at him.

She was dismissed.

But really, why? Someone who knows what a drunk driver can do, really ought to be allowed to sit in judgement of a drunk driver.

My ex wife got out of big boy jury duty up in Columbia because she was due to have our second kid any day at that point. So yeah, get knocked up 8.5 months before jury duty is supposed to happen and you'll get off scott free!

I got released from jury duty just last week. Thank goodness I had a previously scheduled morning dental appointment (for a crown) - if it had been an afternoon appointment, they'd have accommodated an early departure and I'd be sitting in the jury box as we speak.

Jackal99 said:

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CyanideJenkins said:

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I was on a jury for a federal case in Houston back in 2016. Lasted almost 6 weeks. I found it fascinating and excruciating at the same time.

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I got selected for a jury (county, criminal) a few months ago. Trial lasted a week. One of the worst things I've ever been through. But yes, seeing the process from that side was fascinating, especially when the judge and both sets of attorneys came in to talk to us afterwards.

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What was the case about?

I served as a juror for a month on a criminal murder trial involving gangs and the murder of the star witness in a other murder trial. It was wild.

Last one was for child rape and I'm Very happy I wasn't selected for that trial. I was deep in the pool and they set the jury + alts before I was asked any questions.

I've been summoned many times and I do attend. For the fact if for whatever reason you're the defendant you do want rational and intelligent jurors vs getting railroaded by the morons of society.

I'd love to sit on a grand jury.

Are you over 70?

Cen-Tex said:

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Are you over 70?

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I think it's funny that old farts can be excused. But they are one of the few demographics that has the time, inclination, and wisdom to serve.

You probably don't want them if you're on trial for drug use, though...unless you get a panel of old hippies.

Me?
No, feel like it often though.

I was on a jury for a murder trial and the sentencing. One of the more difficult situations I've been in because of the seriousness of the situation. The whole situation was pretty good until the sentencing phase and people wanted to give probation or just a few years. I sort of became the jerk in the room and said that I couldn't walk out of there with less than 20 years. He got 20 years but eventually, he was granted a retrial that never took place.

I just served on a jury the last two days. Luckily it was a pretty cut and dry case and was over quickly. Don't know why the guy contested the charge.
I'm hourly at work so missed out on some pay and have to play catch up at my job.
I didn't want to be there but wanted the guy to have a fair trial. If I ever found myself on that side of a trial, I would want someone that was fair and not one of the other morons that were potential jurors.

torrid said:

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I made it as far as voir dire on a personal injury case. A woman with a settlement from a previous case got in another car crash and was looking to cash out again. She looked pretty much as you would expect, a fat slob.

Her lawyer asked me what I thought of asking for pain and suffering beyond documented medical expenses. My response earned me a tongue lashing from the judge, but got me bounced. Being an engineer also factored into that I'm sure.

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That's all you give us?

AlaskanAg99 said:

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Jackal99 said:

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CyanideJenkins said:

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I was on a jury for a federal case in Houston back in 2016. Lasted almost 6 weeks. I found it fascinating and excruciating at the same time.

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I got selected for a jury (county, criminal) a few months ago. Trial lasted a week. One of the worst things I've ever been through. But yes, seeing the process from that side was fascinating, especially when the judge and both sets of attorneys came in to talk to us afterwards.

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What was the case about?

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Murder would have been preferable. It was aggravated sexual assault of a child. Harris County. I was #61 out of 65, so didn't think I'd get picked. Then all of a sudden the numbers getting selected jumped about 25 spots, and I knew I was gonna get selected. The guy next to me also got picked, and they still only wound up with 10 jurors. Had to pick two more and the two alternates from another 65 the next day.

The charge was one very specific incident, which we were told was the only thing we could consider. In the end, we couldn't reach a verdict (11-1 not guilty. We were all pretty sure something had happened, but again, we could only consider one specific incident.). The judge came in and told us were the second jury to hear the case, and the first one was 6-6.

Got home and felt just awful. That was a Friday afternoon, and pretty much shot the entire weekend for me.

The one time I made it to voir dire, the defense attorney looked at me and started his question with, "Ok, Mr. Aggie Engineer..."

Yeah...I was gone pretty quickly. Doubt he even listened to my answer.

It was case about a small amount of drugs (cocaine)...so nothing crazy.

Weird thing is, I'm 55 and have only been called for jury duty 3 times in my life. Last 2, the jury pool got dismissed before even having to meet up.

Last one, I was supposed to show up after lunch and got a text at 0800 that it was dismissed. I still took the day off, though.

Jackal99 said:

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AlaskanAg99 said:

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Jackal99 said:

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CyanideJenkins said:

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I was on a jury for a federal case in Houston back in 2016. Lasted almost 6 weeks. I found it fascinating and excruciating at the same time.

---

I got selected for a jury (county, criminal) a few months ago. Trial lasted a week. One of the worst things I've ever been through. But yes, seeing the process from that side was fascinating, especially when the judge and both sets of attorneys came in to talk to us afterwards.

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What was the case about?

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Murder would have been preferable. It was aggravated sexual assault of a child. Harris County. I was #61 out of 65, so didn't think I'd get picked. Then all of a sudden the numbers getting selected jumped about 25 spots, and I knew I was gonna get selected. The guy next to me also got picked, and they still only wound up with 10 jurors. Had to pick two more and the two alternates from another 65 the next day.

The charge was one very specific incident, which we were told was the only thing we could consider. In the end, we couldn't reach a verdict (11-1 not guilty. We were all pretty sure something had happened, but again, we could only consider one specific incident.). The judge came in and told us were the second jury to hear the case, and the first one was 6-6.

Got home and felt just awful. That was a Friday afternoon, and pretty much shot the entire weekend for me.

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That's the type of case I didn't want to to be on and is the only type of case where the only witness will be the victim. We were given lengthy instruction before the selection process began so we understood evidence was going to be limited and the victim was a minor.

Was happy to walk out and not be involved.

I often wonder why some on this very forum that preach freedom and liberty show disdain to a process that allows an ordinary citizen to act as a bulwark against an over-zealous government and judicial system.

torrid said:

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I made it as far as voir dire on a personal injury case. A woman with a settlement from a previous case got in another car crash and was looking to cash out again. She looked pretty much as you would expect, a fat slob.

Her lawyer asked me what I thought of asking for pain and suffering beyond documented medical expenses. My response earned me a tongue lashing from the judge, but got me bounced. Being an engineer also factored into that I'm sure.

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What did you say to earn a tongue lashing from the judge??

I've been summoned a handful of times. Only time I made it to voir dire once...it was a traffic case with the idiot defendant, who was probably in his early 20's, representing himself.

They picked their 12 before getting to me. I really wanted to be picked just out of morbid curiosity at what kind of train wreck this guy was going to be.

Just let them know you're a Trump voter.

You won't get picked