I have a strange question - has anybody attended a different church/church service than their spouse and kids? I intend to continue attending the service with them but would like to also find something that I enjoy/find growth in. I switched when getting married and after over 20 years it simply is very unfulfilling to me spiritually.

If Christ is the center of your marriage and family, it seems wild that you would not be in corporate worship together.

goatchze said:

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If Christ is the center of your marriage and family, it seems wild that you would not be in corporate worship together.

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He is in corporate worship together with his family. He then ALSO attends something else. I'm okay with that. It's not much different than going to church with your family and then later attending a BSF or some other study separately. If the guy had said he goes to church with his family and then later to a baseball game without them, nobody would say a word against it. But change the baseball game to a religious service and now everyone has a problem with it? Makes little sense as long as the the other service is not heretical. Having said that, I recommend the alternate service be on the Sabbath. (Heresy!!!).

Principal Uncertainty said:

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goatchze said:

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If Christ is the center of your marriage and family, it seems wild that you would not be in corporate worship together.

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He is in corporate worship together with his family. He then ALSO attends something else. I'm okay with that. It's not much different than going to church with your family and then later attending a BSF or some other study separately. If the guy had said he goes to church with his family and then later to a baseball game without them, nobody would say a word against it. But change the baseball game to a religious service and now everyone has a problem with it? Makes little sense as long as the the other service is not heretical. Having said that, I recommend the alternate service be on the Sabbath. (Heresy!!!).

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Really depends on details we don't have. Is it a different denomination or just a different pastor in the same denomination? I have a friend who began attending orthodox services outside of his normal church hours and eventually converted. Years later his wife and kids haven't followed and it doesn't appear they will. That said, even at two different churches in the same denomination you can't engage and connect with both; you have to choose one or you can't properly serve.

Generally it's not a good idea. Better to be patient and go together.

AGC said:

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Principal Uncertainty said:

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goatchze said:

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If Christ is the center of your marriage and family, it seems wild that you would not be in corporate worship together.

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He is in corporate worship together with his family. He then ALSO attends something else. I'm okay with that. It's not much different than going to church with your family and then later attending a BSF or some other study separately. If the guy had said he goes to church with his family and then later to a baseball game without them, nobody would say a word against it. But change the baseball game to a religious service and now everyone has a problem with it? Makes little sense as long as the the other service is not heretical. Having said that, I recommend the alternate service be on the Sabbath. (Heresy!!!).

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Really depends on details we don't have. Is it a different denomination or just a different pastor in the same denomination? I have a friend who began attending orthodox services outside of his normal church hours and eventually converted. Years later his wife and kids haven't followed and it doesn't appear they will. That said, even at two different churches in the same denomination you can't engage and connect with both; you have to choose one or you can't properly serve.

Generally it's not a good idea. Better to be patient and go together.

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Agree. I would probably convert to Orthodox except for my family who would never do that. So we go non denom.

Yes, this is correct: I purposely left out the denominations as looking at other threads that gets people fired up. I'll still attend with my family every Sunday as I've always done. Earlier in the morning I'm just thinking about adding a different service (and denomination) that is more in line with the way I grew up and helps me grow spiritually (more hymns, music, etc.). Appreciate the feedback though and things to consider.

What is your view or understanding on you being the spiritual head of the house?

I'm a Christian, my kids are Christians, my spouse is Christian and I teach them about Christianity. Words are helpful but most importantly I do this by the way I live my life, treat their mother, treat them and treat others. And constantly try to teach them that each and every day we need to try to grow closer to God. Some days are better than others and there are different ways to do that but that is the goal.

Not much more complicated than that.

Alta said:

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I'm a Christian, my kids are Christians, my spouse is Christian and I teach them about Christianity. Words are helpful but most importantly I do this by the way I live my life, treat their mother, treat them and treat others. And constantly try to teach them that each and every day we need to try to grow closer to God. Some days are better than others and there are different ways to do that but that is the goal.

Not much more complicated than that.

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I'm glad you revealed you were a man because I was about to say my view on this differs depending on your gender.

As the leader of your family, I'd perhaps consider if it was time to lead your family in a different direction. If you're not growing at your current church, are you sure they are? If we are talking something like RCC vs Baptist; that sounds mightily difficult to navigate.

Our primary role as husband and father is to help our spouse and children get to Heaven. If you're looking at a different church because of doctrinal/theological reasons, I would say it's vital to try and bring them along. That's not a preference issue, but a salvific issue.

If you just want to attend a 2nd service because you think it helps you in your walk, then the only thing to consider is if it impacts your ability to be a good husband and father on Sundays.

Principal Uncertainty said:

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goatchze said:

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If Christ is the center of your marriage and family, it seems wild that you would not be in corporate worship together.

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He is in corporate worship together with his family. He then ALSO attends something else. I'm okay with that. It's not much different than going to church with your family and then later attending a BSF or some other study separately. If the guy had said he goes to church with his family and then later to a baseball game without them, nobody would say a word against it. But change the baseball game to a religious service and now everyone has a problem with it? Makes little sense as long as the the other service is not heretical. Having said that, I recommend the alternate service be on the Sabbath. (Heresy!!!).

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I somehow missed that "also" part, although it is plainly in the OP. Thanks.

Alta said:

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I have a strange question - has anybody attended a different church/church service than their spouse and kids? I intend to continue attending the service with them but would like to also find something that I enjoy/find growth in. I switched when getting married and after over 20 years it simply is very unfulfilling to me spiritually.

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This is my current situation. My family attends a church that's currently non-denominational after leaving the CRC (most likely to affiliate with RCA or PCUSA), but for the past 2 years I've attended an Eastern Orthodox Church.

It was a challenge at first, but it's become easier as we settle into it. But in my specific situation, it's also been helpful in ways as my priest and I work through that.

Personally, for us, it's been possible because we see the ways in which we're being transformed in our respective churches.

I will also add, I suggest prayer. I just happened to visit my parish while my family was away at camp. That day changed my life forever. So I know you're just looking right now for something "in addition to", but also consider that you never know how God may work in that. Especially if you're looking for something.