Whitetail buck deer munchin on clover.

Alabama Dixieland Delight.

Lol

Then I crossed the empty street,
'n caught the Sunday smell of someone fryin' chicken.
And it took me back to somethin',
That I'd lost somehow, somewhere along the way.

On the Sunday morning sidewalk,
Wishing, Lord, that I was stoned.
'Cos there's something in a Sunday,
Makes a body feel alone.
And there's nothin' short of dyin',
Half as lonesome as the sound,
On the sleepin' city sidewalks:
Sunday mornin' comin' down.

I like beer, it makes me a jolly good fellow.

EOT.

I was drunk the day my mama got out of prison... And so on.

JUGS!!
I'm not saying she's a big chick or anything
One time I did ask her what size bra she wore
And she said 6-7/8
Said My God, what'd you measure it with
Stetson

He said I'll love you 'til I die

or

To hear the Texas playboys and Tommy Duncan sing
Makes me proud to be from Texas where Bob Wills is still the king

I shot a man in Reno, just to watch him die.

"There ain't nothin' cuter than a fat country baby eatin' peaches on a hardwood floor."

Saw that on SNL once.

"My dinner's on fire while she watches TV
And if you've ever wondered what it's like to be me
She takes all my money and leaves me no smokes
Yells at my buddies and insults my folks
I'm breakin' my back doin' the best that I can
She's got time for the dog and none for her man
And I'm no dope, but I can't cope
So hit the ****in' road and piss up a rope

You can piss up a rope
And you can put on your shoes, hit the road get truckin'
Pack your bag, I don't need the ag
On your knees you big, booty ***** start suckin'
You ride my ass like a horse in a saddle
Now you're up shits creek with a turd for a paddle
And I can't cope -- piss up a rope

Uh, you can piss up a rope and feel the pissy dribble
You can piss up a rope and watch me giggle
For the last 6 months I been packin' your bag
You can wash my balls with a warm, wet rag
Till my balls feel smooth and soft like silk
I'm sick of your mouth and your 2 percent milk
And I'm no dope, but I've lost all hope
So hit the ****in' road and piss up a rope"

-Ween

It's Hard To Kiss The Lips At Night That Chew Your Ass Out all day long.

The only two things in life that make it worth livin'
Is guitars that tune good and firm feelin' women


go ahead and lock this thread now.

quote:

---

Well, it was bound to happen and one night it did
Papa came home and it was just us kids
He had a dozen roses and a bottle of wine
If he was lookin' to surprise us, he was doin' fine
I heard him cry for Mama up and own the hall
Then I heard a bottle break against the bedroom wall
That old diesel engine made an eerie sound
When Papa fired it up and headed into town

Well, the picture in the paper showed the scene real well
Papa's rig was buried in the local motel
The desk clerk said he saw it all real clear
He never hit the brakes and he was shifting gears

Mama was a looker
Lord, how she shined
Papa was a good'n
But the jealous kind
Papa loved Mama
Mama loved men
Mama's in the graveyard
Papa's in the pen

---

quote:

---

Sometimes I can't believe those days are gone
Most of my friends back then have moved along
One's in Hollywood one's a millionaire
Some are gone for good some still livin' here
Me I'm just the same lost in a crowd
Lookin' for the rain in a thunder cloud
I have moved around but it don't matter though
One thing I have found there are just two ways to go
It all comes down to livin' fast or dyin' slow

---

Almost anything by Kris Kristofferson, to me.

He's a poet.

Roses are red, violets are purple.
Sugar is sweet and so is maple syruple.

Roger Miller

Cornbread and iced tea have took the place of pills and 90 proof

And old one-eyed John said her name was Alice, and she used to be a ***** in Dallas...

wh0re...can't even get away with Biblical words or song lyrics...what's the world comin' to?

[This message has been edited by pilgrim82 (edited 11/22/2011 9:38a).]

quote:

---

Ten years ago, on a cold dark night
Someone was killed, 'neath the town hall light
There were few at the scene, but they all agreed
That the man who ran, looked a lot like me

The judge said son, what is your alibi
If you were somewhere else, then you won't have to die
I spoke not a word, thou it meant my life
For I'd been in the arms of my best friend's wife

---

[This message has been edited by Worm01 (edited 11/22/2011 10:46a).]

Girls down on bug creek about half grown
Jump on a man like a dog on a bone

Get your biscuits in the oven and your buns in the bed - Kinky Friedman

"There's nothing in the world more sad, than a broken hearted sinner... out in the world, here in this bar, trying like hell to be a winner."

Roger Creager

For some reason I've always loved that line.

The Perfect Country Western Song -

"WELL, I WAS DRUNK THE DAY MY MOM GOT OUT OF PRISON AND I WENT TO PICK HER UP IN THE RAIN
BUT BEFORE I COULD GET TO THE STATION IN MY PICKUP TRUCK, SHE GOT RUNNED OVER BY A DAMNED OLD TRAIN"

+1 to sushi94

quote:

---

Sometimes I can't believe those days are gone
Most of my friends back then have moved along
One's in Hollywood one's a millionaire
Some are gone for good some still livin' here
Me I'm just the same lost in a crowd
Lookin' for the rain in a thunder cloud
I have moved around but it don't matter though
One thing I have found there are just two ways to go
It all comes down to livin' fast or dyin' slow

---

Another REK selection:

quote:

---

I'm feelin' better since I got your card
I read it over and over when the road gets hard
Ain't nothin' better than your own backyard
I'm comin' home to you

---

And if you want a little bang in your ying yang
If you wanna little zing in your zang zang
If you wanna little ting in your tang tang

I parked my car beside the highway and I didn't lock the doors...left a note there with the keys...'if it cranks, my friend, she's yours'

Anyone mentioning REK for greatest lyrics ever, and NOT using Lonely Feeling as their evidence is useless to this conversation.

quote:

---

Sometimes I can't believe those days are gone
Most of my friends back then have moved along
One's in Hollywood one's a millionaire
Some are gone for good some still livin' here
Me I'm just the same lost in a crowd
Lookin' for the rain in a thunder cloud
I have moved around but it don't matter though
One thing I have found there are just two ways to go
It all comes down to livin' fast or dyin' slow

---

Good choice

"In the bathroom, she slit her wrists. I sat down to a breakfast; bacon, eggs and grits. And I said I may be a dumb ol' country boy but Lord that might be true, but them blonde hair blue eyed beach boys, don't do the down home things I do."

quote:

---

He used to ask about you
About a million times a day
I got so tired of trying to answer
I just turned my head away
Now he don't pay me much attention
He's not asking anymore
I guess he'd probably know you
If you walked back in the door

Calling out to the empty night
Watching as the snowflakes
Come dancing round the light
Dancing up against the window
It's like they're peeking through the glass
And they hover for a moment
And then they fall on past

---

"You're not the best, but you're the best that I can do."

quote:

---

Fall turned to winter another year gone
Over and over again
Some took their lives from their land and moved on
And some stayed on to plow it back in
And the good Lord he giveth and he taketh away
And the restless shall go and the faithful shall stay

Now my grandaddy died in the room he was born in
Twenty-three summers ago
But I could have sworn he was beside me this morning
When the sheriff showed up at my door
So don't you come around here with your auctioneer man
'Cause you can have the machines but you ain't taking my land

---

"Go and see your Momma, son,

She told me that it's time.

But hands off little sister,

'Cause she's mine."


David Allan Coe



BTHO tu!!!!!!

Gig 'em, FAST FRED '65.

Before the world wide web, village idiots usually stayed in their own village.

"Why don't we get drunk ... and screw!"

-Jimmy Buffett

It's a statue of Jesus your grandmother had when she died
All cracked and all yellow
And you know you should throw it aside
But you're growin' religious, the older you get
You haven't been saved
But it could happen yet




[This message has been edited by Andyzipp (edited 11/22/2011 5:20p).]

[This message has been edited by Andyzipp (edited 11/22/2011 5:21p).]