That you want(ed) to spend the rest of your life with a person?

And, what if, you really do dig the person, but, logistically, do not think it'll work out?

i glanced at this thread and thought it said dildo

Logistically?

I read a Cosmo article that said I was past the average age of marriage, so I got freaked out and got all clingy with the person I was currently dating, and finally wore them down and we got engaged.

/typical chick

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lo·gis·tic ( P ) Pronunciation Key (l-jstk) also lo·gis·ti·cal (-t-kl)
adj.
Of or relating to symbolic logic.

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log·ic ( P ) Pronunciation Key (ljk)

The study of the principles of reasoning, especially of the structure of propositions as distinguished from their content and of method and validity in deductive reasoning.

A system of reasoning: Aristotle's logic.
A mode of reasoning: By that logic, we should sell the company tomorrow.
The formal, guiding principles of a discipline, school, or science.
Valid reasoning: Your paper lacks the logic to prove your thesis.

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Thinking about the whole situation & our personalities (reasoning, I suppose), not sure if 'relationship' in which I'm now involved will work.

uh oh pjf has went from gay to grammar nazi and gay

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Valid reasoning: Your paper lacks the logic to prove your thesis.

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Well, I've never been a big fan of logic, so personally, I never let that get in the way. We just found a way to make it work.

If you're having doubts now it's for a reason. You shouldn't have to make a relationship work, it should work on its own.

Hmm. Well, she's a lucky gal.

FTA06, thank you, hon. I have thought the same thing over & over. Shouldn't be this hard.

BTW, how was the zoo today?

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uh oh pjf has went from gay to grammar nazi and gay

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That was an excellent ZING, except that I wasn't questioning grammar. Why don't you bring that one back out during a pertainant (sic) discussion.

It was great but I am completely exhausted. I've already taken a nap but I need another one, maybe one that lasts until about 10am.

I petted an opossum that was completely passed out, it was funny. Little kids at zoos are hilarious.

how long have you been in a relationship kregan?

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We dated for a couple of years & I got feeling funny about things & told him I wanted to break it off & asked him to move (that's why he's out of state now). Started dating again last fall. But, I'm keeping my distance this time. Don't know if it'll work out for us (another long story), so I'm keeping the feelings/emotions in check.

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FTA06, sounds like y'all had a good time. Again, you're a sweet sis.

Love those petting zoo things.

Why would you ask him to move out of state???

well all i can say is good luck. I dont know the guy so i cant give you any advice about what to do with him.

FTA06, his old college roommate lived out of state & was always joking & saying, "Hey, you oughta move here! We could live like we did in college. Got a job lined up for ya."

So, one day, I just said, "Hey, think you need to move there and take that job." So he did.

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So, one day, I just said, "Hey, think you need to move there and take that job." So he did.

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Geez, you should have also asked him to empty his bank account and give it all to you in cash. Sounds like you had a firm grip on his stones.

DA1999, I always wear the pants.

I'm kind of a believer in if it didn't work out the first time, there's almost always a reason for it and that reason will surface if you give the relationship another chance. Notice I did not say always, but almost always. Sometimes there are valid reasons for a couple splitting up that wasn't really a sign of a troubled relationship. But, it kinda sounds like yours didn't work out for a reason.

The beginning shouldn't be difficult, but eventually everyone has problems. It's impossible to be on the same page with someone for the entirity of your life.

The only real question is do you care about the person enough, do you trust the person enough, and do you believe in the person enough to do everything you possibly can to make it work?

If you're going to go by logic then throw love out the window because there's nothing logistical about that!

[This message has been edited by MaxPower (edited 6/24/2005 11:00p).]

Thanks.

We just got off the phone a little while ago. He got a little worried about a few of my statements. As of now, we're together. This whole thing is weird. I just wanted to tell him we should break it off....but I do miss him.

Weak.

Don't drag him along because you feel sorry for him. It turns out even worse for the guy than if you had simply been truthful and honest up front.

first of all, lasting relationships aren't "just easy", they do take work to maintain, especially after you have careers, get married and have kids/a home/pets to care for.... I've been together with my husband for 15 years and if it doesnt take effort some times, then you aren't communicating.

That being said, if you would rather he leave the state than be near you, I'd say he isn't the one for you. Think hard about it...do you miss him or was he part of your routine and you are lonely now? That definitely isn't a reason to marry someone. If that's the case, break it off and go out and meet some new folks.

The person you marry should be someone you can spend time with - and that is up and down time. Oh, and this is VERY good advice passed on to me from a woman in a sad marriage. BEFORE you marry a guy, take a roadtrip alone with him - a couple of day thing. In the car, you will see how a guy reacts under pressure. Is he a nice guy or an absolute a$$. Are his reactions something you can live with or do they drive you gaga?

Since she is in the process of a divorce, she tells me all the time she wishes she'd had that trip BEFORE the wedding.

My wife and I spent our first 9 months dating with her in CS and me in SA.

If it's right, it can work.

I'm not married and am currently single ... so I know this question isn't directed at me. But I think I can contribute anyway.

Pending what your doubts are, I think you should break it off with this guy. I'd been in a relationship where I'd had doubts about us working out in the long run, and those doubts were always there in the back of my mind. As long as they aren't resolved ... you aren't going to be 100% into your relationship; and that's wrong for you and the other person.

Your other half can probably tell you're not all in(and it looks like he has since up above it appears he didn't like a few of the things you said). So now that he can tell you're not all in - he is now going to have doubts about you guys working out.

What I'm saying here is - you need to clear up your doubts with him or break it off now. No sense in hangin' in there when you already know you're not going to be completely happy with yourself while you're in it.

Also - if this guy leaves the state the moment you tell him to - it might be flattering now and something you can brag about - but he's going to bore the hell outta you. If you want a partner to follow commands you should invest in a dog.

Lost a bet and only had one cow to trade when three were required.

AggieAlphaMale, like the dog comment. Actually, think he just didn't want to live in the same city if we were not going to be together. And I think he was looking forward to hanging out with his buddy again. However, he is planning to move back to Texas this fall (San Antonio, I'm in CS).

Anyway, I like your advice, thanks.

I do my best. I saw a hint of my last relationship in your posting - and felt the need to chime in.

Just don't let it drag out. You gotta move quickly and deliberately!

Saying you "wear the pants" could be the problem.

oil baron - I almost hit on that, but I think her winky face carries some weight there.

You're right, Alpha, that's what those winkies are for. In fact, quite the opposite is true. I trust his judgment, and he is more vocal about things, so we usually agree on his decisions.

DA1999, I'm not dragging him along, but I can see how it might appear that way from my statement a few posts above. Anyway, that's why we're having these talks, seeing if we can work this out or not.

KRegan00 - thought so. sorry for the delay in response ... been in H-town for a wedding.

Do you have an update for the fans?