... without discussing the expenditure with your spouse or SO?

Generally speaking I can get away with spending up to $500 without needing to talk about it, but I did buy a trombone once and told him after the fact because I saved $800 buying it on the spot.

I bought an outboard boat engine without ever discussing specifically how much I spent, and it was almost 5 figures.
I just basically said we could afford it and I was going to go ahead and do it, so I sort of talked about the purchase while skirting the actual cost until after the fact.

Given she easily outspends me 4:1, I think I am ok to indulge now and then but typically if it will be several hundreds of dollars or more, we at least run it by each other so we are both aware. I get a little more leeway since I do all bills and taxes and finances.

depends. we each have our own accounts as well as the joint account. we both have full access to all accounts.

no discussion is required for the individual accounts, but it is generally discussed at some point.

so far the most is $71k

ac04 said:

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so far the most is $71k

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but was it fun to drive?

I don't have a limit. But as a general courtesy of being married I usually talk about anything over $5k.

Tree Hugger said:

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ac04 said:

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so far the most is $71k

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but was it fun to drive?

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yes. 2018 m3 competition. it's ****ing sick

I don't have a spouse.

It's your money. Use it when you need it.

Considering I buy something for myself once a decade, it would have to be several grand before I'd even mention it.

For her, $200

For me, whatever I feel

And she outspends me every year

Depends on what it is. Frivolous: $200-$300. Something she knows is important to me and is needed: ~$1k.

Usually it's a couple hundred. Not that either of us would say no, but more of a courtesy.

From our joint checking / savings account for the household? >$500.
But these were almost always things that we'd be discussing or planning together anyway (new couch, TV, a vacation, etc), so it almost never warranted a separate discussion.

From our own respective checking / savings accounts for ourselves? Nunya business.

Can't set a number to it. I would consider the need that we discuss it if it is something that would affect us financially in a negative way, commit us to something long term, induce reoccurring financial outlays, cause the other to have to invest significant amounts of their time, etc. We both do well financially and come from well off families (her's much more than mine, but we don't get anything financial from our families nor are we counted on any inheritance) but considering our peers we live pretty modestly. But, that doesn't mean we don't have some very nice items or splurge on an expensive trip.

713nervy said:

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From our joint checking / savings account for the household? >$500.
But these were almost always things that we'd be discussing or planning together anyway (new couch, TV, a vacation, etc), so it almost never warranted a separate discussion.

From our own respective checking / savings accounts for ourselves? Nunya business.

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The only time I wish she'd have consulted me was on a new couch she bought. When they showed up with it and she told me where she wanted it I said "that won't make the turns through the complex hallway and the door opening. After a couple hours of trying the poor guys had to take it back. The guys didn't mind as my wife really was embarrassed so they got a couple hundred each for trying so hard.

C@LAg said:

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That's what it was like. The salt in the wound was the hallway and door jams needed patchwork and repainting. It's been years since I've been able to say the word couch around her without a death stare at me.

713nervy said:

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From our joint checking / savings account for the household? >$500.
But these were almost always things that we'd be discussing or planning together anyway (new couch, TV, a vacation, etc), so it almost never warranted a separate discussion.

From our own respective checking / savings accounts for ourselves? Nunya business.

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You have your own respective accounts?

In addition to a joint checking and savings, yeah.

I manage our money. My wife doesn't know and doesn't care how much we have as long as she can buy what she wants. I complain at times though.
I generally buy small stuff up to about $200 if it is a guy thing but otherwise I discuss with her.

I really don't. We have totally separate finances, but I'll still mention when I do spend over $1000 or so.

Bachelor, so no problem with how much I CAN spend. ABLE is the problem.

infinity ag said:

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I manage our money. My wife doesn't know and doesn't care how much we have as long as she can buy what she wants. I complain at times though.

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This is exactly the same arrangement we have at my house.

I have problems convincing myself to spend money, so I frequently over discuss purchases even though she doesn't give a ***** Except when I bought a new bike... that call simply went "Just so you know, I'm about to spend a lot of money on a bike. I'll see you at home."